Fooling yourself because you can't forget him yet. Fooling yourself because healing isn't something you're ready for. Fooling yourself because you still love him. Fooling yourself because you can't bear to leave him.
Many people let themselves be deceived by their own emotions, not because they don't see the truth, but because facing reality feels unbearable. They cling to the illusion that nothing has changed because accepting the loss would mean breaking apart. The moment they acknowledge that the person they love is gone, their world threatens to crumble. And so, they allow their feelings to take over, to keep them standing, to keep them sane.
You continue talking to him, staying connected as if nothing happened. You pretend you're still together, even though you know he's already seeing someone else. You ignore the signs, avoid the truth, and convince yourself that maybe, just maybe, things will go back to how they used to be. And the worst part? He lets you do it. He knows it's difficult for you, so he doesn't push you away. But deep down, you both know this is just an illusion.
But why do people allow this? Not everyone does, but some do. Why do you keep denying what's so obvious? Is it because you still love him? Because you're still hoping that, one day, you'll find your way back to each other? That maybe this is just a phase, and in the end, he'll come running back into your arms?
But that's not the case here.
The truth is, you're fooling yourself. You know he's already moving on. You know there's someone else. You know the future you once dreamed of together is no longer possible. But still, you stay. Not because you don't see reality, but because you're not ready to face it.
Healing is never easy. Forgetting someone you love is one of the hardest things in life. People say "move on," "let go," "move forward." But those words are easier said than done. They don't understand how impossible it feels when the heart refuses to listen to reason.
You know that staying connected to him is stopping you from moving on. You know that pretending everything is fine is preventing you from healing. But still, you insist on staying, because the thought of cutting him off completely is even more painful than this slow, lingering heartbreak. Between the two choices facing the unbearable pain of letting go or living in a fragile illusion you choose the one that hurts a little less.
It's not the right choice, but it's the only one that makes sense to you right now. At least this way, you can still talk to him, still share your thoughts, still feel like he's part of your life, even if the love between you has already faded. You stayed, and he allowed it not because it's what's best, but because even he knows how hard it is to truly say goodbye.