Mini was a handful and a half.
The paternity tests came back, but I didn't have to look at them to know this baby was mine. I scanned over them, but after all the time I spent with Nellie, I couldn't find it to be angry or disappointed. The little thing had grown on me.
Apparently I get benefits from the adoption center, Lexi's social security, etc. It helped me out a ton. I could afford the diapers, formula stuff, and even this cool carry on thing that held her close to my stomach and I could still be arms free. I haven't gotten her a crib yet, but she'd taken nicely to the corner of my arm pretty well. Still, I'd have to get on that shit. When she wasn't crying, or spitting up peaches all over me, she was actually a chill baby. However, she was crying and spitting up a great majority of the time.
"Nellie, please." It seemed to be a mantra for the two of us. She was almost two months old, and I'd been looking a lot online about what to expect when the baby turns that age.
She makes noises now, which was pretty amazing and annoying all at once. All she did was 'ah' and 'dooo', but she did it so often. I could tell she was going to be a talker.
The most amazing thing I was looking forward to in her two month growth was finally getting her to smile. I tried to make funny faces but she just got scared, so I stopped.
When my Mini finally took down her food, I decided I should check the mail. Mini and I spent our Saturdays at the park, usually. My work schedule had been hectic before, but with the income from Mini I was able to cut back a few hours and spend some quality time with my little girl.
I still haven't told my parents.
It's probably a shitty thing to do, but they could hold off for a while.
I make my way down the staircase, bumping Nellie in my arms, trying not to coo at her in public. If I didn't have to take care of Nellie, I'd be getting laid every night. You can't imagine the things that women want to do to single fathers. It's sick.
I'm not sure what a DILF is, but these teenaged girls at the mall whispered it to each other. I have to remember to look that up.
When I make it to the mailboxes, the girl with the nice ass was there. I'd seen her (and her ass) a lot more now that she moved into the apartment above me. I never talked to her, or looked at her, because every time I saw her she was yelling at someone. She had a really pretty voice, if that even makes sense, so sometimes I eavesdropped on bits and pieces of her conversation. Usually, talking to a girl wouldn't bother me, but something about her was extremely intimidating.
So I choose this moment to dawdle around the mailbox, patiently waiting for the woman to move. For some reason, this chick likes to read her mail at the mailbox.
Can't she see some people want to avoid her?
I quietly wait, and check out her ass for a few more moments until Mini opens her big mouth.
"Adoooo." she mumbles unintelligibly. Fuck my life. Then the girl turns around, and I see her face. That's actually a lie; the first thing I see is her eyes. They were the most expressive ones I'd ever seen.
I mean, usually I go for the more exotic eyes, you know? Brown is known as being so typical, and boring. But these eyes, for some reason, were anything but. Then I looked at her lips, which were really kissable and red, but also really distracting. I could see myself looking at her lips for hours, which was a really big problem.
I'd seen plenty of attractive women before, and she wasn't the hottest thing I'd ever seen, she was just different. In a really, really, good way.
She stares at me for a moment, then she raises an eyebrow and I think my balls shrink into nothing. Like I said, this girl really freaks me out a bit. She's always screaming. I think she's kind of pissed I was openly checking her out, but then she sees my Mini and it's like she's viewing the Holy Grail. Her eyes light up and her mouth opens in this playful baby grin that probably only she can actually pull off. Then, she reaches over and puts her finger in front of Mini's mouth, and wiggles it around. Mini watches it and makes all sorts of little noises she never made for me.
I want to snap at her, because who the hell just plays with people's babies? Is that even normal? Then I think that Nellie might be the only reason that I get out of this place alive, so I just let her.
The Nice Eyed ( I'm not being crass today) Girl looks at me and doesn't smile or anything. "How old is she?"
My tongue feels really heavy but I just look down at Nellie and try to man up. "Almost two months."
She smiles, nods and then laughs when Nellie almost reaches for her finger, but then pouts when her arm can't move like her little hands.
"What's her name?"
"Jacob."
She pauses and gives me a dubious look. "You named your daughter Jacob?"
I try not to look embarrassed and look down at Nellie again. What the hell is wrong with me? "Her name is uh...Nellie. I thought you meant...my name is Jacob."
I thought she'd be pissed, but for the first time she laughs at me. Not in a rude way, but in a comforting way. "I'm Elena." she shares kind of quietly. Hm. Elena.
She has a weird confidence in her tone. Even when she's speaking softly, she's really authoritative. I've decided I'm both scared and, oddly enough, turned on.
"She's adorable."
"Just like her daddy." I say surprisingly. I haven't really referred to myself as Nellie's dad before, but this odd surge of pride fills me. I cockily puff out my chest a bit and Elena rolls her eyes at me and continues going ballistic over Mini.
It was starting to get awkward because I hadn't gotten my mail and we were just standing, sharing Mini. "Do you like kids?"
Well no shit, Jake.
"I love them," she tells me in an even tone. I ignore her a bit and try not to dwell on the tenseness of the air. I needed my fucking mail.
"I uh..." Why am I talking like this? "Could you hold my kid?" Elena giggles at my question and then nods enthusiastically. Well, it doesn't take much to make her happy.
I'm sort of jealous because Mini goes straight into her arms and snuggles towards her chest like she's known her forever. She holds her perfectly, just like I had to look up online to do. So I kind of hurry to get my mail out, so that way Mini doesn't get to comfortable.
"Nellie." Elena hums kind of nostalgically, "Did your wife name her?" I shake my head and pull out the contents of my mail box.
"No, I don't have a,....I'm not married."
"Girlfriend?"
"No."
"I'm sorry." She says sincerely. I nod and I'm really not sure how to ask for my baby back from this girl because she looks like she could rip my balls off so I decide to offer an alternative.
"Want to walk me back to my apartment?"
She eyes me warily and I backtrack. "No, I mean, you seem to have fun holding her, and I have this mail to carry, so..." The only mail in my hands was a coupon to Pizza Hut. She bites back her laughter and nods.
"Okay. Jacob, you're really funny. Kind of stupid, but really funny." she remarks. I've never met a stranger or a girl that's called me stupid before. My mind races. Did I even say anything funny? I'm not even being my charming, arrogant, self. We start walking back, and I furrow my eyebrows.
"Why do you say that?"
"You've been walking around me like you think I'm going to rip your head off." More like balls, but okay.
"You're pretty intimidating." I admit. Elena seems like a nice girl. A nice hot girl. A nice hot girl who actually gets along with Nellie. This could be an issue.
Elena laughs. "I'm not. I don't try to be. It's what my job entails."
I try not to be caught up in how pretty she is when she smiles. I can't just start acting like a pussy because the girl is attractive to me. "What's your job?"
"I work at rehabilitation center." She tells me. "I work with people with addictions. Our cases come from family members that ask us to help their relatives."
I find myself actually interested in what she's saying. "What would make you want to do that?"
"I think it's remarkable. I have a younger brother, and I think the bond between siblings or family in general is pretty impeccable. It warms my heart to see people doing things for the people they love." She was definitely passionate about her work, that's for sure. I didn't want to tell her what I did for a living. Being a factory worker isn't the first thing I want to tell her about me.
I've always been really independent about everything I did. When I was adopted, my parents had a lot of money, but I never took any of it, even to get into college.
The outcome of putting my pride first, was that I ended up having to pay off school that I only went to for two years. I live paycheck to paycheck, which could be quite the struggle.
I was always proud of my success. I was an adopted teen and I made it out pretty unscathed. I got a job, went to college for a couple years, and had good friends. I was never ashamed to let people know that, because for the circumstances, you can get away with pretty much anything.
I'm a little ashamed right now.
He's got a kid, and he has no career.
I smile at her and when we reach the apartment door, she continues toying with the baby. What is with this chick?
"She seems to like you." I tell her honestly. Nellie always pulled on Bonnie's hair and Nik teased her too much, so Mini was just as annoyed with him as I am.
"Kids love me." She says seriously. I'm a little sick of her attitude just because I've never had someone act like this towards me. She acts twice as cocky as I do, except she isn't as smirky. She's dead serious.
"Are you always so odd?"
"Yes, but right now I'm mostly trying to get a reaction out of you."
"It's working." I say sarcastically. "Can I have my kid back?"
"Maybe in a second." I stare at her for a long moment, and my traitorous kid tucks her face into Elena's chest.
"You're insane." I tell her. She snorts and laughs and I bite back a smile because I've decided I don't like this girl and I'm not going to laugh at her jokes or her cute snorts.
"You asked me to hold your kid, did you not?" Her eyes twinkle with mirth and I scowl.
"For a second."
"Actually, you didn't give a time frame. I have to be at my yoga class in an hour, I should be done by then." Fuck no. I'm not even going to get caught up in the fact that she goes to yoga, and is probably rather bendy.
"This is my Mini and I's time together. This is fucking kidnapping."
She smiles. "Shh, don't curse." She chastises me, looking down at Nellie with a grin. This woman was fucking nuts. She isn't keeping my baby for another damn hour. I run a hand through my hair and bite my lip. She watches me for a moment and then quickly returned her gaze to my baby.
"Give me my fucking kid."
"I said to stop cursing."
"I said to give me Mini."
"Her name is Nellie, and you're going to scare her."
I glare at her and shake my head, "Just give me my baby back." I growl, "you can't just take someone's kid."
"I'm not taking her." She clarifies in a snotty tone. "I'm just standing here. In front of your door."
I can feel my face turning red and I scowl at the floor. I can't just grab Nellie. If I were a chick, I could punch her, but I'm a guy, and I don't hit girls. I could call Bonnie, but she would probably join this wackos side.
I haven't felt this mad in forever.
"Besides, what are you going to do?"
"Call the fucking cops!" I lose it, and I yell. I think she wanted that all along because she smiles at me the biggest she ever has, and she looks so fucking beautiful but that isn't important at all right now. I knew this chick was crazy. I just knew it.
My neighbor comes out the door and he's this 50 year old man with a gas problem. I've never actually spoken to him before, so I'm surprised when he sticks his head out to see us.
"What's going on out here?" He mumbles tiredly. Suddenly, Elena gets a solemn look on her face. She turns to the man, and shakes her head.
"Nothing at all." Her voice cracks and she looks like she's going to cry.
"What the hell?!" I shout, because this girl is nuts. She's hot as hell, but she's nuts. "Give me my kid!"
An innocent expression casts over her face. "Okay, Jacob." She hands Nellie over, and lays a kiss on her forehead. "Mommy's gonna be back. When Daddy stops yelling, I promise I'll be back."
I don't know what to say, because the old man looks like he's going to get a gun. I swear I hear a gun cock. Then Elena wipes this fake ass tear and stomps away. And of course I watch her ass, because I'm still a guy, and it is still a nice ass.
As if this wasn't enough, Mini starts crying like a motherfucker. "Dammit." I mutter. The old man's eyes stay trained on me in a cold glare.
I have no patience left. "What?!" I snap at him. He recoils, but then shakes his head.
"This isn't even her kid! This is my baby!" I exclaim angrily. He slams the door on my face, and Mini cries harder.
I open the door to my apartment and mutter curses as I look for the pacifier.
"If you don't care, why are you still talking about it?"
"Because, there has to be a law somewhere about this shit. I've been looking for her and-"
"Why are you looking for her?" Bonnie says with a taunting look. Nellie pulls on her hair and she flinches. Good girl.
"Because, she stole Nellie. Almost."
"She wasn't going to steal her, Jacob. I've never seen you this worked up before. I think it's funny." Of course you do.
I'm not going to lie and say that Elena hasn't been on my mind the past week. She hasn't been at her apartment this week, and I'm still pissed but halfway intrigued and concerned. That makes me more pissed.
I don't care about her at all, I care that she stole my kid. That's what I'm concerned about. I think.
"She's nuts, and Mini wouldn't stop crying for an hour after she left. She even spat out her pacifier. This chick has put me through hell this past week. I deserve an apology." I announce indignantly. Bonnie scoffs and feeds Mini more formula.
"I don't think she's thinking about this half as much as you are."
That's another thing that pisses me off! She just swoops in, ruins my life and makes me all crazy, and then leaves.
That should be illegal too.
"You should really get her more food instead of formula." Bonnie says, straying from the topic. I accept and appreciate the change and nod.
"I want to, but they haven't sent me any allergies and things for her." Mini visibly perks up at the mention of her and lets out a little 'gah'.
Bonnie hums and I continue. "Nik and I have been looking up cases online, and all these kids throats close up and shit, it's crazy."
Bonnie laughs at that and puts the formula down. "Stay away from the internet. And stop cursing around Nellie! Months are going to fly by, and soon she's gonna be saying her first words. If it's 'fuck', I'm going to rip you a new one."
That would be funny, but her first words need to be daddy.
I looked up an article online, and they told me that if I say the word a lot, she might catch on. So lately, I've been doing a lot of talking to her in third person:
"Daddy's here."
"Eat for daddy."
"Daddy loves you."
The 'L' word was another big milestone. I surprised myself when I said it, but I definitely meant it. How could I not love my Mini? It was overwhelming how quickly I'd turned into a dad and how good I was getting at it.
"I need to get a new babysitter. Lora Underwood says she can't do it anymore. Monday through Thursday...is that really so hard?"
"Yes." Bonnie says as she scowls at Nellie for pulling her hair again. "People work."
"It's afternoons."
"If it's so easy, you would be able to do it." She says, daring me to argue. I don't.
We sit for a moment, and I toss back a beer while I watch some CSI: Miami. Bonnie breaks the silence with something I've been dreading for a long time.
"Have you told your parents? Damon?"
"Now, why would you ask me that? I'm in my element, Bennett, I don't have time for heartbreak." She rolls her eyes and if she could, she'd be hitting my shoulder right now.
"You need to tell them. This isn't fair."
I hum and ignore her. I really don't want to fight with Bonnie, because she's like my little sister, and every time she gets angry with me I always get really guilty. But also, I don't want to tell my parents. I don't even care if it's a dick move anymore. I thought about what Elena said when she wasn't being a nutcase. When she was talking about the bond between a family.
I never had that bond, because I was not family. After deducing that I loved Nellie, I know I love her far too much to give her the half-assed love I had to endure growing up. Nellie was going to be spoiled with people who gave a shit; people who genuinely gave a shit. I'd make sure of it.
"It wouldn't be fair to Nellie to put her in that family, anyway."
"But it is fair for you to take away her only grandparents?"
"How many kids do you have, Bonnie?" I snapped. She shut her mouth and glared at me.
"Don't be a dick, Jacob."
"No, seriously. You seem to think this is all a walk in the park for me. You think I haven't thought about all that? I'm not a damn idiot. I know shit too. Not just from the internet, either. I know you think that you know a side to Damon that I don't. But the truth is, we haven't spoken in years, and I'm not about to show up at Christmas time barreling a baby, so they can judge Nellie and I. Nellie can have other grandparent figures."
"You don't even know how they would act, Jacob. You're bitter, and acting close-minded."
"I don't know how they would act? They fucking raised me, Bennett. You don't know how they would act. I don't know where you got this image of the Salvatore family from, but it's twisted."
She pauses and bites on her thumb nail. "Damon told me-"
"Half the stuff Damon spurts out comes straight from his asshole."
That was that.
"How's Nellie?" A voice goads from behind me. I look back and squint my eyes. I'll be damned.
Maybe I should pinch myself. "You sure have a way of pulling a nice, dramatic, disappearing act." She chuckles at that and walks towards her mailbox. Right next to mine. She smells really good, which I always liked about girls.
"I didn't disappear, Jacob. You just haven't seen me in a while. The socially acceptable response would be to ask me how I am in return."
I pull myself a little closer to her, no longer intimidated by the basket case. "I'm not always socially acceptable."
She lets out an airy laugh and eyes me warily. "What, no screaming? I'm surprised." She teases. I put my hand to my chest dramatically.
"You mean, I'm not the only one who you pulled a psychotic stunt on? I don't know if I should be relieved, or offended."
She gives me a lazy, sarcastic smile, and turns on her heel after slamming her mailbox shut. I follow her on her heels and she wheels around to give me a dubious look. "What the hell are you doing?"
"Nothing, I'm just making sure a pretty woman gets to her home safely." She squints her eyes at me suspiciously and sighs.
"I'm far too tired to be dealing with your shit today." She relents. I perk up a little at her crestfallen expression and continue to follow her up the steps.
"Rough day?"
"Rough week." She says with a bitter laugh.
I raise an eyebrow. "Is it a patient?"
She nods sadly. "Yeah, but he's a little closer to home than most." I motion for her to continue, and she does, but not without giving me an annoyed look. "I'm not going to tell you much, only that he isn't as motivated as he should be, and it's hard to get that motivation going, you know?"
I nod, because I can be an attentive listener and nice person when I want to be. Plus, I want to know why she left that whole week and why it bothered me so much.
"I bet you didn't want to know all this when you decided to follow me up here." She kids, lifting her shoulders back into her confident pose. I scoff.
"I followed you up here so that I could watch your ass, but being a venting toy was just as fun. You know, if you ever want to get together sometime, and judging by your expression, you might want to, feel free to drop by my house. Anytime." She stares blankly at me and then reaches out and hits my shoulder. Hard.
"Fuck." I curse, rubbing the spot. She glares at me and turns to her door.
"What, you're just going to walk away?"
"Yes, I'm going to walk away, otherwise I might end up shoving my foot up your ass."
I feel my voice getting louder. "No! Let's talk about this; let's talk about how you've been fucking him everyday for the past month, on our couch, with our child in the room!"
Her face dawns in realization and her face heats up. "Jacob, this isn't going to work." She whispers indignantly. Her eyes flash with a cross between annoyance and amusement.
I try harder. "You don't give a shit about her, and now you're going to take her from me? Fuck you, Elena. Fuck you."
Her glare intensifies and a girl, maybe our age, opens the door, seemingly on her way to work. She looks up at me with frightened gray eyes and I glare at her. Elena turns to utter something to her, but I stop her.
"Don't try to play the fucking victim, okay? You're not taking my fucking kid. You can keep fucking the mailman, but you are not going to take my kid."
Then Elena crumbles, and she's not the confident girl I met at the mailbox. She looks flustered and embarrassed, but angry and hot as hell.
The woman with the gray eyes looks at me with pity. Good. "And another thing, stop calling my phone. We're fucking done. You'll hear from my lawyer."
Then I leave her, standing there, until she unfreezes and starts yelling curses.
"You jackass!" I hear her shout.
At first I just snort, but then I start laughing really, really, hard. I think she hears me, because her insults get louder. Huh. I guess I see the appeal to this after all.