My name is Zoe. I'm an average human that works on computers. I probably get paid way more than I need to at my job but I still complain because that's just the human thing to do. My boss is a complete idiot and my co-workers take credit for work they didn't do all the time.
My work.
Of course my boss doesn't give two shits. He just gives me a smug look and says something like "Well at least someone is doing it. I just want it done." After, he'd usually shrug and go hide in his office for the rest of the day. Let me make a correction, hides from me for the rest of the day. It really becomes a bit more annoying when he decides to go out for lunch and 'forgets' to ask me to come along. He then comes back and says something like. "Oh! I forgot to invite you! I'll get ya next time, kay? Kay." Then go hides in his office. My only saving grace is the one other worker who does anything here and the one guy I'd call my best friend. Max. He normally does the half of work that I'm not doing. We easily started to get along and sometimes plan to one day leave this company together and let it crush itself. However, My boss seem to realize how important we are so he pays us a pretty sum to keep us around. It's the only reason we have not left yet.
Anyway, enough complaining about my boss and my work. The reason I ranted about that was because I needed to explain my after work habits. I go clubbing everyday after work as a stress reliever. I say clubbing but in reality, I just sit at the bar and drink until I get wasted. Then I walk home. I don't live too far from it and I've done it enough to know my way back blind and deaf. Not to say I want to be blind and deaf but at least I'd have something I could do. Sometimes I can get Max to come with me and by come with me I mean watch me so I won't do anything stupid because I'm going to get wasted. He doesn't seem to have a problem with it usually but this time he declined the invitation for whatever reason. He only really declines when his wife is on his ass about something ridiculous. So I went to the club alone...which changed my life forever. Sadly I can't give you any details about what happened that night so I'll skip to this morning.
I woke up in my bed feeling warm. Well normally I wake up warm obviously but this time I felt warmer than usual. I felt a leg going across one of mine, half my body had another naked person on it and there was a hand on my chest. I have no idea who this person is or where they came from but given I was naked as well, I figured I probably got a little too wasted last night. I also realized something else. The way this person was holding me prevented me from escaping without waking them. It wasn't like I could escape anyway. We were at my apartment...oh yeah...and this woman had no head. I just let my head hit the pillow and groaned. Let me explain why I didn't freak out.