I'm a piece of shit.
Fucking hell, why am I doing this?
"What the fuck man, you're doing shit today!" Andrew snaps, throwing the controller at me from his beanbag chair.
"I'm preoccupied, man," I complain, picking up the controller and handing it back.
"You're supposed to be the talented one, Chester! Our team is losing!" Rhea says.
"So? It's just one match!"
"Against the team just below us, Ches, this means everything! What are you thinking about, anyway?" Drake asks.
"None of your business." I start focussing on the game, helping the others beat out the kills of the other team.
I swear, I carry this team. Anyway, when the match is over, we shut off the game and head downstairs to eat something. The others are chatty, as usual, so I can relax. My little sister comes in to grab a package of Dad's cookies--he'll be pissed--and heads back into her emo ass room before my friends can start in on her.
"Do you get your fashion sense from your sister?" Andrew asks innocently.
"Fuck off dumbass, she's twelve. Everyone in middle school is an emo," I say, cracking a chip between my teeth.
"Then what's your excuse?" Drake asks.
I roll my eyes. "Girls, duh."
"Girls don't go for monochrome, Chester," Rhea alerts me in an attempt to help.
"Well, they don't seem to mind it on me. Look, guys, I just don't feel the need to wear color. Just pin it on me being clueless about making choices like what color matches my complexion," I say.
Rhea tilts her head. "Honestly you do look good in black and white. But have you considered grey?"
"That would make his eyes look greyer, Rhea. Girls dig blue eyes!" Drake scolds.
"Sounds like guys dig blue eyes, D," Drew comments.
"Oh, fuck off, you know I'm straight!"
"You're all clueless straight boys, we are aware. Stop arguing. Remember last time?"
"Last time we were drunk!" Drake and Andrew both say as one.
I snort. "The time you guys kissed to prove you weren't gay?"
"Drunk. We were drunk." Drake clears his throat.
Andrew just stuffs a handful of chips into his mouth to avoid speaking. Me and Rhea exchange a look of amusal. We both know that they don't like eachother, but it's fun to screw with them anyway. I mean, they're jerks.
"Okay, my parents are gonna be home soon, you all should probably go."
They groan, annoyed that we can't play more video games, but leave anyway, listening to me. I finish my food, and head upstairs, dragging my feet. Between friends and my parents, I hardly get a moments respite. I open the door to my bedroom, hearing Eva's music through her speakers for a second before I shut the door behind me.
I pick up the controllers and put them all on chargers, then flop down on my bed, sinking into my mattress.
I'm rich, respected, popular, and I have everything I could dream of. So why do I do terrible stuff? The second I'm left to my devices, I do shit like join the fucking Villains Alliance.
Yeah, big surprise, rich boy leads a double life. Batman anybody? Except unlike DC or Marvel villains, I don't have some sob story to bring method to madness. I guess I just needed some thrills.
All this happened after I discovered my peculiar aptitude for summoning demons. All I wanted was somebody to help me, I was feeling desperate and lonely, when he appeared.
Kalju, a demon who was trying to make friends. It just happened that he was exactly what I needed at the moment, and I didn't even know how he got there.
He tends to be the easiest to summon demon I have. The dangerous ones are harder, but I've gotten better and better, and it only gets easier. I can control them.
Kalju suggested that I join the villains. I agreed, because I figured the heroes wouldn't appreciate my skill set. The only thing I needed was a name... And Kalju came in clutch with hundreds of suggestions.
Finally, we settled on Decayance.
Decay and decadence combined. Both of my lives easily smashed into one name. Ingenious. Nobody knows about my life as Decayance but Kalju.
And nobody knows about Kalju except the villains. A perfect situation, really. And since the heroes are very deliberately gentle, my family doesn't know either.
Of course, my rival is dreadfully close to crossing the line of injuring people. Fucking Assassin Insect. A genius, really, but somehow clueless at the same time. His electronic weapons send my demons back to their realms instantly, and his antennae device tends to deal brain damage.
Which is why as soon as he starts trying to use that thing I hightail it out of there. I know he doesn't mean to do any harm, but I assume the device is still imperfect. Like the wings he's making.
Those are impressive. Surprisingly compact, sleek, and occasionally they even work! I laugh at my own thoughts.
Man, I don't even mind it when that guy beats me. It's not like I really want to control the city, I just want some fun. And genius man provides. He's excellent with his swords, and decent with his shurikans. He eludes capture easily and confusingly.
He's a badass.
I draw the symbol of summoning on my bedspread with my finger, and Kalju appears beside me.
"Hey, Chester," He greets, setting down the comic he was reading when I pulled him here.
"Woah, demon comic!" I pick it up, then sigh. It's just a regular Dark Horse comic.
"We get mostly the same reading material as you do, Ches. What's up?"
"Being a villain. Why? Seriously, why did you put this idea in my head?" I ask.
"Chester, I'm a fucking demon. I corrupt kids like you. It's my thing. Kind of, um, in my nature? Like how summoning demons is in yours," He says, "But man, this was your call. Don't pin it on me."
"I just don't get what made it so compelling."
"The constant romanticizing of villains and evil you're surrounded by daily as a human. Twilight, Joker 2020, every fandom ever?"
"Don't get me started on romanticising mental illness, trauma, and chronic illnesses... Okay, I guess that does make sense. Thanks, Kal."
"No problem, you little shit. Fist bump before you send me back?"
I smile, give him a fist bump, and draw the return symbol on the bed. He's gone instantly.
I hear my mom pull in the driveway, followed by my dad. I look around to see if there's any mess in my room, then grab a sheet of homework from my bag and start working on it at my desk. My dad goes to tell Eva to turn down her emo rap, and Mom peeks in my room to see what I'm up to.
"Shouldn't one of your friends be in here playing videogames and distracting you?" She teases, sitting down on the bean bag.
I smile. "I sent them home so I could focus. Lots of homework today."
"Responsible. Well, I'll leave you be! Your aunt and cousin are coming to dinner tonight, dress appropriately!" She looks at me. "Or stick with that. Love you bunches!"
"I love you too, Mom."
She leaves, and I keep working on my math. No reason I can't get it done. I was a little distracted today, the kid beside me was taking up some of my focus with his incessant staring and awkwardness. It was worse than usual, because I asked him for a pencil.
And the wink probably didn't help. I need to regulate my levels of charmingness from now on, especially in Math. I mean, Rizaldo Sundita--Rizzy--isn't as annoying as some of the people I deal with, but I probably should crush any idea that he has a chance with me.
I'm straight, after all. That never comes into question, because it's obvious. I like girls, even though I don't date much. I just prefer the freedom of not dating. I'm happier single.
I look through my closet, trying to see if I have any better shirts for tonight's dinner. Aunt Martha is rather picky with fashion, and so is Denley, my cousin. Should I wear a tie? No, those things are suffocating.
I'll just fix my hair, I guess. I head to the bathroom with my comb, and consider my messy golden locks. Where do I even begin? I sigh, and summon Kalju.
"Can I not read my comic for ten minutes? Why am I in your bathroom?" He asks, setting the Dark Horse comic on the counter.
"My aunt and cousin are coming over and they're very particular about looks. I don't know how to handle my hair."
"Shave it off."
I sigh. "It could use a trim. And since you're here, you can help with the back!" I grin.
"You have to comb it before you cut it, Chester," Kalju says.
I admit defeat, and struggle to comb my hair while Kalju reads his comic. Then I throw a towel over my shoulders, snip the front, and have him do the back, checking it carefully.
"It looks great! Thanks, Kal!"
"You're still mentally a mess though."
I shoot him a glare, and put the scissors back in the cupboard with the comb.
"Okay, I won't bother you for the rest of the day," I promise, sending him back.
I clean up the hair that was cut, then check none is on my clothes. I brush my teeth, apply chapstick, and go downstairs to wait.
"Oh, Chester, you changed your hair!" Dad notices, looking up from his Business magazine.
I smile sheepishly. "It looked a mess before," I say.
How will I survive this dinner?
"Hurry, they'll be here any second!" Mom says, pulling Eva down the stairs by one of her pale wrists.
Eva, as usual, is wearing black, but you can tell it's one of the dresses Mom bought her. The dress has a flowery light pink pattern, a loose skirt, and a belt-like tie on it. Mom even got her to cooperate with different makeup, a light blush and pale lipstick with winged eyeliner.
I know Eva is only okay with it because it's bonding time with Mom, who isn't around much.
We hear the honk that signals Aunt Martha has just pulled up, so Mom drags us all to the door so we can greet them. Mom opens the door for her sister with a welcoming smile, and Martha kisses her cheeks in greeting.
Of course. They were with Grandma and Grandpa in Italy, so now they're going to bring the culture back with them. Only Grandpa is Italian, but of course, Americans love to over-immerse themselves in the culture of their ancestors. Me and Eva both take after our father and Grandmother. We're pale and blonde.
Denley steps in behind Martha, smiles slightly, and then becomes his usual stern-faced self. Now, Aunt Martha turns her attention to me and Eva.
"Oh! I swear, you two are growing so fast! Eva, you look absolutely gorgeous!" She gives her a quick hug. "And Chester! You're getting taller than me! Love your shirt. Very sophisticated!"
I give her a smile, glad when she doesn't try to hug me. We all go to sit down at the dinner table, and Mom gives everyone a plate of her lemon pepper salmon with steamed broccoli.
"Oh, this is lovely Marie! Remember that night Mom made this, when I told her I was engaged? Salmon everywhere!" Aunt Martha jokes. Mom smiles slightly, and we all start eating.
"So, how's school, Chester?"
"He has amazing grades!" Dad answers for me. I smile awkwardly.
"Any lucky ladies in your life?" Denley shoots her a glare, she rephrases, "Or lucky gentlemen?"
"Uhm, no." I shove a forkful of broccoli in my mouth, fully understanding Andrew's diversion tactics.
She moves on to talk to Eva, and I focus on my food. Denley is just as quiet as I am, so I don't feel obligated to talk. I shouldn't have promised Kalju I would leave him alone, now who will I vent to? Probably Drake or Rhea. I mean, Andrew is my friend, but he really wouldn't care.
"Alright, meals over! Kiddos, you wanna head upstairs and catch up? The adults need their time," Aunt Martha says.
We all go upstairs, somehow ending up in my room.
"Denley, you play videogames, right?" Eva asks, turning on my gaming console.
"Yeah." He grabs a controller, and they start playing Minecraft, not asking me to join.
Which is all well and good, now I can message Drake.
Chessy: My aunt and cousin are over for dinner and it's so fucking weird.
Draco: That sucks ass. My mom was too tired to make dinner, so I get Sandwich al á Lone.
Chessy: That sucks even more ass. Next time that happens just come over here, we always have extra.
Draco: Ah, yes, the Copley family; always in excess.
Chessy: Rich shaming is as hurtful as poor shaming, you know. I didn't choose to be upper-class.
Draco: Mostly I meant your mom's excess sexy, but that too.
Chessy: Fuck you. Stay safe. Bye.
Draco: You too. G'night.
I set my phone aside. Drake is probably my closest human friend. He actually cares about me, and we've been close since third grade.
"Who were you messaging?" Denley asks, mining iron in the caves.
"Drake. You met him last year at the homecoming football game you decided would be a bonding expirience."
"The snarky one or the sweet one?"
"Sweet one."
"That guy makes me wish I was in school here, Christ," He says.
"How's Italian school, anyway?" Eva asks.
"It's... nice enough, I guess. They think I'm retarded because I speak slower. Makes me want to stand up in front of class and lecture them on Quantum physics."
"You're the smartest in our family, congratulations," I say.
"Well, you're socially adept and Eva is creative, so it looks like we all have a talent."
"Socially adept... hm," I mumble.
I think it's more that I'm good at acting. Easily falling into roles. Good kid, cool friend, demon-summoning villain. I think I'm most comfortable with my normal role, confused teenager.
I mean, wouldn't you be confused if you could suddenly summon demons? I lean against the headboard of my bed, and think about my two terrible talents. Acting and summoning.
Aunt Martha calls Denley down, so we all go to say goodbye to our extended family so they can go back to their hotel. They leave, and everyone seperates instantly. Mom goes upstairs, Dad goes back to his magazine, Eva and I go to our rooms. I flop down on my bed.
Sleep sounds good.