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Chapter 30 - Ram Is Ram

Ram is Ram.

We know who Ram is.

Ram is great.

Ram is love.

Rem just wants to slap her in the face.

Subaru sees his morning star under his pants, he guess Beatrice didn't kill him this time.

That's good.

He doesn't want to end up in a endless loop of suffering and pleassure from Beatrice.

"Rem, rem. He's looking at his dick."

Ram says to Rem.

"Sister, sister, I agree that he is looking at his own genitals, he's probably thinking about us and thinks if it can fit inside of us but it's too small."

Rem says to Ram.

"I agree, Barusu's dick is pretty small."

Subaru:

"H-hey! You want me to show it??"

Rem:

"Yes! I mean...

*cough* No need sir, we probably would take minutes to figure out where it's located."

Ram:

"Rem, Rem. If we were to look at it, we would probably need a magnifying glass, Because it's so microscopic.

Rem nods.

"Sister, sister. I agree, our guest is really hopeless."

Subaru:

"S-stop being so mean!"

Rem:

"Sister, he's begging for us to to stop."

Ram:

"Rem, let's not stop teasing him violently until he proves he's not a spy."

Rem nods.

"Alright, sister."

Emilia comes in with her hands up.

"Here comes Emilia! The greatest character in this show! Yes! thank you! thank you! I appreciate you all!"

Subaru looks around.

"Uhhh."

Emilia: "Subaru you're finally awake! I'm so glad. The twins were looking for you when you were gone but you were found just laying down near a door. I do gotta ask, what happened?"

Subaru:

"Uh, well, you see. ... Let's forget about that. that doesn't matter."

Rem:

"Miss Emilia, your guest has awoken."

She points to Subaru.

"and was talking about his genitals."

Ram:

"Miss Emilia, his dick is microscopic."

She points to Subaru.

"and I'm sorry I have to say it."

Rem:

"It's alright though Subaru.

I will appreciate you no matter the size."

She stops pointing and puts her hands on her front.

Ram:

"Rem, that's not part of the script.

You're not supposed to love him yet."

She stops pointing and puts her hands on her front.

Rem:

"Oh oops, thank you for reminding me sister."

Ram:

"It's no problem at all, Barusu will oogle you later.

Emilia:

"Alright you two enough with teasing."

Emilia approaches Subaru.

"How are you feeling?"

Emilia asks him.

Subaru rubs his chin.

"Well, My stomach hurts, my penis hurts.

But I'm fine overall. You look beautiful in that dress by the way, Mimi!"

Emilia:

"Mimi?"

Subaru:

"Oh it's uhh"

Subaru rubs the back of his head.

"It's a pet name, since we're close together, we need to have pet names because it makes sense."

Emilia thinks.

"Pet names huh..."