Junpei reached his doorstep at ten in the night. The harvest has been called off early because of an incident that the police are now on. This was good as he got to go home early to watch over his sister. He also didn't want to see what he saw anymore or do what he did.
Flashbacks of the little sister he threw away and her neck snapping in front of him repeated themselves for his viewing. They were vivid and intense.
Junpei squeezed his eyes to shut them out. He stood there for a while. Hesitating to come home to his sister because he felt like a fraud. Was he truly a brother fit for his sister? He finally inserted the key into the door lock and opened it.
Kata-kata
He heard footsteps as Hanae ran downstairs. She stood a distance and stared longingly at him.
"Brother! You're home early!" She said excitedly.
"The meeting finished early today. I might not need to come in for a couple of days." He smiled.
"Brother... Where's your pin?" She asked worriedly.
"I... didn't want to get it dirty," He said avoiding her eyes
"Dirty? What have you been doing brother?"
"Nothing. I just don't think I should be wearing that in front of others."
"But that's why you should wear it... Don't you remember?"
"Of course, I do. But we all grow up. I can't just keep wearing that for the rest of my life."
Hanae stared at her brother with teary eyes. She was worried that he didn't remember the symbol that the pin represents. She was afraid that he was changing inside too. She can already tell from his expressions that something was wrong. Especially when Junpei wasn't looking at her, she knew he always did that when he was hiding something.
Hanae felt that she was losing her brother but so did Junpei. The distance between them feels literal when he looked out how far she was standing from him. Although a coincidence, the distance between them and the expression on her face was reminiscent of what he saw that day.
***
Junpei's mother has divorced two years ago. Ai Kaoru was better than the average businesswoman but couldn't be called an elite. She compensated for the raw skill with her looks. Her body finally found its way to her husband.
Years later quit his high position and started a company which she wanted to be a part of. She got her husband to put her in a high position out of greed which he accepted for a while. Until he found a new mistress.
His wife knew he was having affairs but that was to be expected. She wasn't a fool to believe that men can be satisfied with one woman for the rest of their lives. She was fine with it as long as she was the main woman, his wife.
He, however, needed someone competent to replace her position. His company was being held back by her. Ambition, perseverance and skill was his only redeeming quality.
It wasn't necessary to marry someone to have fun with them but he felt that one of the girls he has been cheating with was irreplaceable, he loved her. They wanted to marry and so he demoted Ai to a position fitting her skill sets, of course, she was furious and demanded that he give it back to her.
When he didn't, she quitted. He also gave Ai the divorce papers which she refused to sign for a long time. When she finally signed them, she took custody of his kids to pressure him to either remarry her or give her back her old job.
She didn't love him but was attached and she was mad she lost her high-ranking position. A nice high-ranking job was the high she had instead of the pleasure of sex. Her children were just tools to her. She never played with Junpei or Hanae and never gave them a sense of familial love.
She'd often lash out because of her frustrations. She got a job but she wasn't happy as it was a middle-class position. Her body wasn't the same as it used to be after having kids and entering her 40s. She had to compete with the new generation of nubile office women.
She's currently dating a man in her workplace who was in his 50s and whose grey hairs populate 80% of his head. He has some modesty despite his strong lustful desires and so doesn't touch her much, but when he does, she finds him disgusting. She tries hard to hide that underneath her alluring smile.
Junpei having to raise himself and his sister, often protects her from Ai's blows. The broad chest and shoulders he inherited from his father make him look like a large and sturdy shield.
Her bullying gradually reduced as they got older but were mostly verbal by then.
One day she walked to Junpei's room with loud footsteps as she usually does to signal her arrival. When she opened the door, she saw Junpei shaking like a madman. It shocked her at first but Ai understood that he was acting out of frustration.
Her abuse has finally taken a toll on him. She knew he was expressing insanity but wasn't insane. She thought that everyone does crazy things under stress, sometimes when no one is looking. Like shaking crazily and laughing randomly when home alone.
She knew that he was just trying to make her laugh sardonically so that she'd leave him alone this time or gain her sympathy and show that he was at a high-risk mental state to abuse.
However, she would not take the bait. She was greedy and merciless.
"You piece of sh*t! You missed a spot! Can't even clean the toilet properly."
She was referring to some dust at the corner on the hinges of the toilet seat and inside the gaps of the hinges themselves.
"Are you that pathetic and useless that you can't even clean where you shoot your filthy waste? You are just like the dirty toilet seat. Maybe it's because you're a boy. I should drag Hanae out here and get her to clean up your mess!"
Junpei suddenly sat up from his bed with a retarded look on his face.