Madame Muffinpie opens her eyes, dazzled by the light of MA's gargantuan, pellucid, and spherical soul. Her soul engulfs the trading port, or rather, what is left of the trading port. After Madame Muffinpie slings her sickle, dissipating MA to nothing but residual vapor, all that remains are ruins. MA's deafening sob finally stops, and with its leave enters a blinding darkness, disrupted only by the lights of growing fires and fractured lampposts. As the smoke subsides, the lights reveal obliterated freights; eugh fulgurites; and many, many, many maimed but not dead people. The cat surveys the horror.
"Oh." She gulps, slipping MA's soul into the body bag but not shifting her gaze. "Huh."
The other Hotel employees rise from the wrecked warehouse. Before anyone can process the event, Molly rushes to Madame Muffinpie, who explains the catastrophe. The two maids call the Hotel and beg for backup. They begin the grueling process of cleanup, which is especially difficult because they phase through not all but a torturous amount of objects and people. They don't phase enough to rationally quit, but they do phase enough to experience tedium-induced trauma.
Steadfast, Juno sprints to the crumpled Hearse. Oto jump kicks through the nonexistent windshield. He lands on the charred ground softly. Cheron's unconscious body sways in his arms.
"Is she okay?" Juno reaches a hand to Cheron.
Oto's eyes fall and stay on her. "She's tired." He sits down on the ground and sets the Scythe somewhere near. He shifts to where he thinks Cheron would be more comfortable. Juno sits beside them.
Hal trudges toward the Hearse. His eye bags sag down to his tusks as he, unblinking, inspects the vehicle then reaches in his back pocket for a roll of duct tape. Repairs are somewhat difficult as well.
Still atop the warehouse's remains, Todd grabs Juby's arm. "SQUAWK?" He neatens her uniform. "SQUAWK? SQUAWK?"
"I'm fine!" She swats away, looking around as she does. "I'm not a baby, Todd, I can handle myself, by myself, now." Her eyes drift to Juno. "He didn't once check to see if I'm okay."
"SQUAWK."
"Yes, I know what I just said sounds silly now, but you'd think he'd check at least once."
"SQUAWK…"
"I know I'm already dead!" She crosses her arms. "Some friend you are…"
The two concierges back up, noticing a dark-skinned, somewhat flayed arm reach up from the wreck. The flayed bits reveal scuffed metal and sparking wires. It's Lorel AI. She heaves rubble off herself, dizzy from rebooting. Her unfocused eyes snap to Oto.
"You…" Lorel AI snarls, limping toward him.
Still focused on who he's holding, Oto doesn't notice. Todd and Juby attempt to console and grab her; neither is effective. She tears a small but very sharp shard of her forearm's chassis and grips it tight. Only Juno sees this.
"SQUAWK!" Todd scurries behind Lorel AI. "SQUAWK!"
"Ma'am..." Juby follows, picking up the pace. "I know we've had our differences, but it would be totally tubular if you would just please save your criticisms for later. And maybe don't make a big deal of how I punched you. I'd have to change my default skin again and that's always a pain. Please. Come on. Ma'am. Ma'am. Tubular, I said. Please?"
With arms wide, Juno steps in front of Oto and Cheron. "Ma'am, I'm warning you. I will do anything to protect Cheron."
"I'm sorry. I didn't quite catch that. Who? I just want Death." Lorel AI smiles. "And, just so we're clear, basically, I am 148.8 kilograms of cold, hard steel. You are literally a gas. What should I expect?"
Juno looks around. His eyes fall on the Scythe. "I have a weapon." He reaches for it.
Cheron's eye bursts open.
Oto stops stroking her bangs and looks up. "Juno? Wait." He begins to lay Cheron down. "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wa—"
Juno holds the Scythe. The moment his bare hands grace the snath, he feels death (the concept, not the himbo). Juno is human; he experiences time linearly, so I will present what he sees the way he sees it, but, you know, with words. Come on. I'm trying.
So what does death feel like? To watch the sunrise one last time. To know you are watching it one last time and not ask for more even though you want more.
It is starting something new. It is what you sacrifice when you start something new and when you ask yourself, "Was it worth it?" It is concluding it was not. Why should you do anything? You must answer. Otherwise, why is life worth living? You must answer or else you might as well just die. Why not just die? Isn't that easier? You must answer.
It is settling. It is two people making plans to meet but never meeting and never telling each other that there was never a chance. It is knowing you will never leave your dead-end job. It is knowing you will never find better friends. It is knowing because you stopped trying. Why did you stop trying? You must answer.
It is picking a flower. It is putting said flower in a vase of just water and watching it wilt completely within a week. It is forgetting about it. Why do you take it if you know it will die? You must answer.
Remember when playing pretend stopped being fun? When the world stopped being overwhelmingly big and beautiful but kept being overwhelming? What changed? You must answer.
The sting in the back of your eyes, long, long after that Thing already happened. Tell yourself no one thinks about it. 99% of the time, no one thinks about it. However, that 1% gnaws at your skull. Why do you care? You must answer for yourself, to yourself, or else you will hate being awake, and you will do everything you can to shake the feeling.
You will distract yourself. You will make something, then you will be disappointed in what you made or you won't even finish it. So why not just watch something? Why not take drugs? Isn't that easier?
You will deflect uncomfortable conversation. You will change the subject and laugh and at some point you will stop being funny or charming or cute. Why do you hate silence?
You will seek comfort, but making friends is difficult. Making people care is impossible. Why not just cry? What if no one hears you? What if people do hear you but no one cares? What if it hurts way more now? You will have created another painful memory. How will you live?
You will run away.
You will act like you don't care.
You will overwork and act like that's any better.
You will lie.
You will be someone else.
Alternatively, remember that no one thinks about you anyway. No one thinks about you. Does that feel better? What feels better? What do you think? What do you want? You have to decide because, who knows, you might die as you read this and now the last thing you think is a wishy-washy mess. Do you want that? What do you want? You must answer.
You cannot give more. You cannot get more. Everyone is just waiting for a turn to be loved. Not everyone gets a turn. It doesn't make sense. It isn't fair.
Natural, necessary death is realizing that. It is realizing that this is all there is and the only way to make it better is to believe that it is better.
This call is for you. You must answer.
That's the abbreviated version, anyway. I just wanted to get the feelings across. Truthfully, as he holds the Scythe, he sees you, and he sees all of time, but I didn't show you that because I don't want to spoil the rest of the book. Also, I'm a lazy bum. Okay, back to your irregularly scheduled story.
Juno blinks. "Oh. Huh. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH."
Lorel AI takes several steps back. "Not what I was expecting."
"Juno?" Juby peels herself off the ground.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH." He hacks away frantically, still gripping the Scythe as if undergoing rigor mortis. "AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AHA AHA HAHA AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AHA AHAH!"
"Hm." Lorel AI pivots and glides out of Juno's range. "Sure. I can wait until after to give my criticism."
"Juno! Are you—?" Juby ducks. "You absolute spazz!"
Juno stops. He stares at and through Juby, not seeing her but rather the past and future he spends with her. He sees pain.
Fear brims in her eyes. She doesn't recognize him. "Just be careful, o—" The blade hews between her lips. She dissipates. All that remains of her is her sickle. It clatters on the rocky ground. Oto swipes it. Around Juno, Juby's excess vapor swims, forming wings and rings of fog. He hacks through it all.
Todd's eyes widen as Juby's somber visage reflects off the Scythe. He unsheathes his sickle and lunges for the bellhop. The sickle hurls down. Juno blocks it and strikes with a spin. Todd just barely limbos beneath it. Juno round kicks Todd's back. The bird stumbles forward, turning his head just in time to see the sharpest end of the Scythe.
Before Todd's sickle can fall, Oto snatches it and flings it at Juno's neck. Not looking, Juno deflects it. The sickle returns with a spin. Oto tilts his head. The sickle almost flies past. Oto grabs it then throws both blades. Juno dodges one and slings back the other. Oto leaps. The projectile slices the ground where Cheron was.
Juno vomits, as if overdosing. He falls to the blackened eugh. "Cheron." He drops the Scythe. "Cheron?"
"Right here," Cheron says from behind. She picks up the Scythe. Her hands are bare.
"Oh." Juno faces her. "Sorry about that."
She yawns. "Yeah."
Oto picks up the sickle he just dodged and chucks it at Juno. While Oto walks over to collect the blades, Cheron nearly falls over. He grabs her too and lays her in the back of the tape-ridden Hearse, atop the peachy pink pillow.
Before he can close the door, Lorel AI meets him. Unconsciously, Oto is still gripping the sickle holding Juno.
"You knew this would happen. You have lists." Lorel AI's yellow eyes pierce Oto's kumquat ones. "You could have stopped this from happening, but you didn't."
Oto grips the sickle tighter. "No, no, please, I swear. I didn't know about the moon or— How the hell could anyone have known that it was alive!"
"It was your job to know! You have to know these things!" She falters. "Aren't you supposed to know this sort of thing? Isn't this your purpose?"
Juno's reflection, a glazed gaze, swirls and fades. Oto holds the sickle a bit too close to his neck. Oto can't move. The blade cuts, but nothing comes out. He doesn't even feel it.
"Ma'am..." Hal interjects, tapping Lorel AI's shoulder. "The LIFE AFTER LIFE Hotel staff is very sorry to inform you that your broadcasting ship is in critical condition, which means, when you die, you're entitled to compensation of a FREE tea set and UNLIMITED time in—" He inhales."'The-room-filled-with-pimento-grilled-cheese-paperclips-just-stuffed- to-the-brim-with-that-specific-thing-I-know-it—' Hm. You know what, ma'am?" He twirls a roll of duct tape around his finger. "It would be better for you if I explained this all while repairing your ride."
"Hm." Lorel AI puts a hand to her mouth. She notices that it's missing quite a bit of artificial skin. "You're good at repairs? Could you repair me too?"
"Of course." Hal grins a tusky grin. "Cross my heart and, well, you know." He walks her back to her ship, nodding to Oto as they go.
Oto smiles painfully but genuinely. He enters the Hearse's driver's seat then looks to Cheron in the back. Her sleeping face is littered with bruises, abrasions, and eye bags. The man's neck begins to bleed. It is the worst pain he has ever felt.