Pagka pasok ko sa pintuan pa lang ay hinanap ko agad sila mommy at daddy sa katulong na sumalubong saken.
"Nasa garden po si Ma'am. Si Sir naman po nasa Library." Sagot nito.
Hindi ako ngumingiting umalis sa harapan nya.
I know its very unsual for me to not smile to the maids.
I am really in bad shape today.
Una kong pinuntahan si mommy sa garden. Nakita ko syang nakatalikod at nagdidilig ng mga halaman.
Mommy loves Flowers. Pinagmasdan ko sya. She's really beautiful kahit halata na nag edad neto sa mukha.
Tahimik lang syang nagdidilig.
She looks so peaceful.
I don't know what i can feel pag nalaman kong alam ni mommy lahat ng natuklasan ko.
"Mom .." Agaw pansin ko. She looked at me and smile like she always does.
"Yes dear? Nandyan ka na pala? Saan ka natulog kagabe? Nag alala ako sa'yo. I can't even contact you. It says your out of reach." Sunod sunod na tanong nito.
I smiled. Hindi parin sya nagbabago.
When it comes to me and lindy, parang daig pa nya ang imbestigador.
"Morning ma. And about the other night, I slept in the office. I got lazy to drive so yeah. And about my phone, I'm sorry i forgot to charge it" paliwanag ko.
Mom looked at me again.
I know that look! Hindi sya naniniwala.
Pero hindi na sya nagsalita pa at itinuloy ang pagdidilig sa mga halaman nya.
"Mom .." Tawag ko ulit. This time hindi na sya tumingin sa akin.
But i saw her sigh.
"I hate to say this but i know you're lying. I don't want you to pressure you to say anything to me. Malaki kana. Marami ng naranasan." Pag uumpisa nya.
"Pinalaki kitang maayos at laging pinangangaralan na ang pagsisinungaling ay masama. I don't want you to lie. Because it might ended up you, lying to yourself" she continue.
Mom always has a point.
I smiled bitterly.
I remember those. Sana bata na lang ako ulit.
Pero hindi pwede right?
"Yes mom, you taught me that. But can i ask you a question?" tinatagan ko ang loob ko.
I know mom will understand.
"Sure. Ask away. Hangga't kaya kong sagutin lahat anak, I will give you anwer." Sagot nya.
"Did you lie to me?" Matapang kong tanong.
Napatingin sya sa akin na nakakunot ang noo. Clueless to what I am asking.
"About?" Clueless nyang tanong.
I look at her eyes. And i saw nothing but confused eyes.
So she knows nothing at all.
"Lie about what leigh?" She ask again.
Oh god. I'm doomed!
"Ahm .. No mom. Just don't mind what i said" sabi ko.
Nilapag na nya ang hose na gamit nya at lumapit sa akin.
She touch my cheeks.
She has a very soft hand. And it calms me.
Napapikit ako.
No one can ever be this good as my mother.
"What's wrong anak?" She ask. Her voice is soft.
She's worried.
"Mom .." i know tears are starting to fall down. And i can't do anything about it. I can't help it.
She hug me. Not knowing what I've been through.
She let me cry to her shoulder.
Inalo nya ako.
"Hush now my baby" she said while patting my back.
Like she's saying 'Nandito lang ako'
Mas lalo akong napaiyak.
Akala ko wala na akong kakampi, akala ko.
And mommy's here. Hindi nya ako iniwan.
Pinatingin nya ako sa kanya.
She wipe my tears.
"Always remember mommy's here ha anak?" She said.
And i cried to her.
I really can feel her love and support.
I know mom's is hurting. I can see it through me. She's hurting for me.
"I'm sorry .." sabi ko.
She just smile at me.