"Ouch, I have lost myself again."
Sia.
In short, the date was amazing. Even talking about it now causes my skin to buzz and my heart to melt as if it were ice. Just day-dreaming about the hot-pink petals on those flowers, the reds and oranges mixing together, the loving words that Wyatt spoke, it's enough to bring me over the edge of an overwhelming happiness.
Somehow, during this period of time in which we spent together, the perfect boy ended up confiding in me, telling me about his toxic relationship. It was difficult to get through, second-hand pain doesn't even begin to cover it. He would stop to take deep breaths, run his hand over his face, pull on the ends of his hair. Evidently, I would rub his back, whisper in his ear that everything's alright, that he doesn't have to continue.
Being the stubborn person he is, Wyatt was determined in carrying on and fortunately, he managed to, despite the misery that was created when reliving those memories. I held his hands, I hugged him and when he was done, I rewarded him with a kiss on the cheek. I rewarded him with a thank you. Not just for telling me, but for everything that day.
In summary, Wyatt explained that his toxic relationship consisted of three dominant factors: manipulation, insecurity and lack of trust. When giving a description of his past relationship, he said that the girl would mainly control how much time he spent with family and friends, what he wore, who he talked to. Then, he went into the fact that he was always judged, always diminished and seen as inferior, always neglected.
Life appears to be one, big circle because the girl that Wyatt was in a toxic relationship with, is the same girl I saw posing with him on Facebook, when I discovered that he slits his wrists. Wine-red hair, ocean-blue eyes, flat stomach, slim waist, pimple-free face, perfect pink lips. She's the type of girl my grandmother said that all men wanted. She's the type of girl that anyone would fall head over heels for.
From the outside, Wyatt and her seemed like the ideal couple.
I could never live up to that.
"What's her name?" I asked, hoping I wasn't being intrusive.
"Heather," he deadpanned. "Heather Marie."
Heather Marie.
Such a pretty name.
Such a pretty girl.
Such an ugly personality.
...
Red boasts about his exemplary performance at athletes club as the leaves whisper and the breeze caresses our cheek. Planes fly in the light-blue sky, drifting past the blinding, white clouds. Flint-grey pigeons flutter their wings in preparation to take flight and look for the nearest meal. A caramel-brown dog fetches for the mint-green ball thrown by its owner.
Meanwhile, the side glances and snarls pierce through my skin, my melancholy rising as whispers travel and fingers point. Tuts and sighs of disapproval are passed by everyone, anyone willing to discriminate the plus size girl whose mere existence irritates her peers. Keeping my head down, I make an attempt to ignore them, a little disappointed that I still haven't managed to numb the pain.
Pushing and shoving the crowd out of his way, Wyatt waves to me, smile plastered across his face as he hastily jogs to catch up with us. Whilst he greets me, asking how the rest of my weekend went, I can't help but notice Red's vexation and annoyance, his eyes rolling at every compliment Wyatt offers me, exasperation evidently intertwined in the huffs and puffs that escape his lips.
"You look really nice today," Wyatt says, expressing his admiration. "Not that you didn't look nice yesterday or the day before-"
"That's nice, Hunter, but instead of giving Blue your empty compliments," Red interrupts, "you should focus on flossing. I can literally see this mornings' breakfast trapped between the large gap of your front teeth."
Giggling, I witness as the perfect boy panics, reaching for a mirror in his back pocket. I send Red a huge grin and he reciprocates this small gesture before turning to our flustered friend and adding;
"I was joking, dude. You look fine."
Frowning, Wyatt returns the mirror back to its original place, glaring at me the whole time.
"You know, these past few days have been kinda uneventful. I kinda like it," I smile, stepping into school whilst being taken by the immense congregations of students.
We laugh and joke all the while to registration, shaking our heads when wanting to compose ourselves. Playfulness is conveyed through every act of friendship and I relish in this happiness, finally relaxing.
However, all good things come to an end because that's when I hear it.
"May Valentina Blue-Rose please come to the HeadMistress' office?"