People don't understand what happens between us, what I feel for you, why we write to each other, why we don't see each other, why I don't put an end to such a messy relationship.
I don't understand either, but I've accepted it.
I still hurt sometimes, but not because it's blurry. On the contrary, it's very clear: the reason why I hold on to you is you.
I didn't make a detailed list to know whether I should break up ties with you.
In the pros, there's you.
In the cons, there isn't.
And the only thing I know is that among all these "I don't know", the only thing I don't want is a life without you.
It's as simple as that.
Well, it's not that simple actually… But I think we can always make things simple. I think it's up to us.
I don't expect anything from you. I just want you and only you. Not because I accept it as a consolation prize, but because I don't want anything more than what you can give me.
I don't want a standard relationship; I want what we have since the beginning. This thing that looks like nothing else, that neither you nor I have known in the past.
Earlier, when my stomach hurt, it wasn't because I was jealous.
It was because I missed something: our beginning and the intensity we've known and lost.
I remember a time when you were as happy after we saw each other as when you came back from her place earlier. A time when you always found ways to see me, a time when you wanted to see me.
That's what I miss, what I envy you and your girlfriend.
I don't want you for me only.
I don't want to deprive you of all the joys you can find outside of me, because they are worth discovering and experiencing.
I don't want you for me only, but I want you in my life.
I love you for no reason.
Neither for your qualities nor despite your flaws.
I don't think about the future.
I think about today and I realize that even apart, even after a year, I still think about you.
I shiver when I read your words. Your messages never leave me indifferent. They make me smile, angry or cry but never, ever do they leave me cold.
That's why I keep coming back to you.