♡Harry's POV♡
I love Louis. I am truly in love with Louis and the past two weeks have been amazing. He kisses me everyday, holds my hand, cuddles with me, sings to me, he is doing everything I've ever wanted. When we won the talent show, a rush of excitement and love went through my body and I could not help but pick him up and twirl him around. In two weeks it will be my birthday, I hope he asks me to be his boyfriend because I am afraid he will never ask me. I have a new song I have written for him, and I want to give him a present on my birthday instead of him giving me one. "Niall please I need help." Louis barges in the room and he is on the phone, why is he talking to Niall?
"Lou?" I say, he was unaware I was in the room and his face is filled with dread and worry. "I will text you later bye." His voice is annoyed when he hangs up and throws the phone in the floor and walks to me and straddles me while I sit in the office chair. He sighs and begins to speak"Hazza I'm so upset." His voice is muffled as his head is pressed into the crook of my neck. He continues, this time with his forehead pressed against mine, "Niall was supposed to help me with your birthday present and he backed out because I am-" he stops and brings up his hands, "a fag" he uses his hands for quotations. I hate Niall, I hate him more than anything. "Do NOT listen to him Boobear, I would rather you get it by yourself then to get help from that idiot. Let's stay away from him yeh?" He nods his head and lays it back down on me. He is small, his legs dangle and can not reach the ground. He is warm, the heat from his body makes me burn up. He is perfect, and I want him to be mine. "Can you reach and get me a pen out of that drawer." I say to him, I want to write something on his arm to remind him of the love I have for the small boy. He reaches to the wrong drawer and pulls it open. Fuck. "Wrong drawer Lou..." I whisper. That was the drawer I hid all the extra pills I was supposed to be taking. I could feel the anger build in his chest, I knew he was going to scream at me. Im a horrible person, I deserve nothing but dirt.
"Harry what the fuck!" He is not loud yet but he is mad at me, I know he is I can feel it in my heart. He gets off my lap and sits on my- our bed. He pressed his index finger and thumb on the bridge of his nose, I do not know whether to cry or to answer him. "Harry you know God damn well you are supposed to take those! Do you not remember what happened last time you stopped taking them? Are you dumb Harry, no you aren't you are smart so why the hell are you doing this shit again!" He gets louder and louder and almost yells at me. My choked sobs are the only thing he can hear as I try to answer. I do not like taking the pills, they make me loud and I talk too much, I don't want to be someone that gets in everyone's way...especially Louis'.
"I-I get annoying when I t-take them and I didnt w-want to bother everyone e-e-especially y-you Lou." I take a breath to catch myself from stuttering, I'm so afraid he will leave. "L-Last time I stopped I got quiet a-a-and everyone stopped bullyin-ng me so much and y-y-you didn't tell me to calm d-down a-all the time L-Lou. Please dont b-be mad a-at m-m-me." I choke out the words as I can. My stutters and sobs get in the way and it takes me longer than it should to speak. I know he is mad, he is going to be mean, I hate it when she is mean. The last time he was mean was in 8th grade, he called me so many bad names. He opens his mouth, why cant he just kiss me and hold me to make me better, I just want to be okay right now.
"Harold Edward FUCKING STYLES-" he stops to calm himself, he is going to blow up, and it is going to be bad. "If you do not take those I will shove them down your throat and make you. You get bad with out those, you get too fucking sad and want to die and I'm too afraid to loose you. You dont get fucking annoying you come out of YOUR FUCKING SHELL YOU HAVE BUILT UP AND YOU DONT NEED ONE YOU NEED TO BE YOURSELF I DO NOT LIKE IT WHEN YOURE SCARED ALL THE TIME IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I CAN NOT PROTECT YOU DUMBASS!" I can in no way control my crying this time as I fall to my floor and wait for him to hold me, but he doesnt, he walks to the door and stops before he leaves. "When you decide to grow the hell up and take your medication that HELPS you, Ill be back but im going to the bakery. Bye Harry." He left, he left my laying on the floor bawling my eyes out and its my fault. He doesn't love me anymore, I know he doesnt.
I spend my day alone in my room, no calls or texts. My mum hasn't even checked up on me and Louis isn't home. I open one of my bottles and decide to take one, if I want Louis to come back I have to take one. The phone rings and rings and rings until he picks up. "What Harry. " He is still mad at me and I sing think he will come back. "I took one of them, please come home. Please I need my sunshine. " Im crying again and I dont have the energy to stop anymore. "Harry Ill be home tomorrow, I'm going to stay the night with Liam." He isn't being nice to me, he said he would come back when I took it. He lied to me. "Is Niall going to be there too." My voice cracks and I dont care if he hears me like this. He knows I don't like Niall. He sighs into the phone and I can just see him rolling his eyes. "No. You honestly think I'd do that to myself or to you?" At least he wasn't going to be with him, he just needed to be away. "Right now, I wish you were here with me. And right now everything is new to me....and I cant fight the feeling and tonight I'm feeling it. I need you....right now." I let my heart speak for me and it comes out a jumbled mess but I dont care. I dont care if he is mad, he is supposed to protect me. "Baby..." he called me baby. Holy fuck he called me baby. "You know I cant resist you. Ill be home in a minute. I love you." His words are finally soft and sweet again, he hangs up before I can respond. Happiness fills my body as he walks through the door and I throw myself at him. My boy is back.
"Louis, Louis, Louis." I whisper into him. I haven't even noticed I have him pinned against the bed until I open my eyes to see the small boy beneath me with wide eyes. "Harry, Harry, Harry." He smiles, a broken smile. His eyes are red and puffy, his face is tired, and his hair is messy. Is he drunk? "Lou?" I ask him cowardly, how could he be drunk right now when I need him. "Louis. Are you drunk?" I repeat to him but all he does is look at my lips and tries to kiss me, im not letting a drunk man kiss my mouth. "Im not drunk I just had some beer with Li" his voice is like earlier but slower and slurred. I've never seen him drunk, he'll I've never even seen him pick up any alcohol. "Let me kiss you." He whispers pulling me in as I try to get up, but he won't let me. I rip myself away and step back, he is scaring me. I dont feel safe right now, not with him being drunk.
"Just kiss me please I need you baby." He speaks and its like I'm talking to someone I dont know. The sudden feeling of worry fills my body from head to toe when I realize he didn't mean to call me baby on the phone, that was the beer talking. "Louis no, you aren't yourself. I will kiss you when you aren't drunk." I speak to him slowly and softly and I walk back slowly towards my desk. I need to call my mum, I'm scared. The only person I've ever known to drink was Louis' dad and he was a bad person, I did not want Lou to be like that man. He keeps walking towards me and wraps his arms around my waist, I'm not safe. The memories of his father flash through my head and I cant hold myself up. My body falls and I hit my head, everything is black and I can not see, feel, smell, or hear anything. Everything is black and all I can think about is Louis' dad. I hate thinking of him, but it will not go away.
♤Louis' POV ♤
When I came home 5 days ago Harry thought I was drunk and wouldn't let me kiss him, I wasnt drunk and I only had one beer. He has been laying in the hospital for almost a week and he hasn't woken up. He hit his head on his desk and started bleeding and shaking, I thought he was going to die and if I wasnt there he would have. I wait everyday after school at the hospital for him to wake up and he doesn't. He hasn't woken up and I'm afraid he never will. My poor baby is asleep for who know knows how long and I miss him. I wish he was okay and I could hold him. Flashes from that night go through my head again and again.
*flashback*
I run upstairs to my love, my everything and he tackles me to the bed. "Louis Louis Louis" his shakey voice is a whisper to me, and he is scared. "Harry Harry Harry." I repeat to him smiling and giving him a hug and he pulls away, did I do something wrong? He looks so attractive right now, his hair is in a bun the way I like and he is wearing his blue jumper I bought him for Christmas. "Lou." Why is he scared of me, I didn't do anything wrong? "Louis." He says my name again, this time louder and more violent. "Louis are you drunk?" Why would he say that, he knows I would never get drunk because of my father. I try to kiss him and he pushes me away, I feel so alone and so scared, what is the matter with my boy. "Im not drunk I just had a beer with Li." I speak clearly so he knows I'm okay and he should not be scared of me. I lean in again for a kiss, and once again he steps back. "Just let me kiss you." I say with a pouty face so maybe he will pity me and let me kiss the boy of my dreams. I grab his arm to hug him and he rips himself away and presses himself against his desk. "Just kiss me please I need you baby." I keeo my voice soft and sweet, he is scared and I dont him to be worse. "Louis no, you aren't yourself I'll kiss you when you aren't drunk." His voice is cracking and his pupils are dilated, what is the matter with him. I reach for him again and he pulls back, he slips and his head on the corner of his desk and when he hits the floor blood is pouring from his head.
"HARRY!" I yell for him and shake him, he doesn't move and I feel useless I don't know how to help him. I pull out my phone and call Anne, there is nothing else to do. She is a nurse and she will know what to do. "Anne Anne please come home! Harry fell and hit his head and he is bleeding he won't wake up please Anne please he needs to be okay please!" I cant control the tears running down my face as I hold my baby. "Call an abulance I will be at the hospital. Cover his head with a rag he will be okay Louis." Her voice is calm, way too calm. How can she be okay when her son won't wake up!
*end of flashback*
♡Harry's POV ♡
I open my eyes and see bright lights all around me, there is a woman beside me that I dont know and she is pushing liquid into an IV in my arm. "Oh my good heavens you're finally awake!" She seems excited and smiles very wide at me. Im in the hospital? Why am I in the hospital. "Where is my boyfriend?" My voice crack, my throat is dry and I'm so thirsty. "Boyfriend?" Her voice is high like my mother's, she seems nice but she is confused. "He is short, blue eyes, brown hair-" she cuts me off and claps her hands. "Oh the sassy lad that comes by everyday! I'll get him!" She runs to the door before stopping at turning to me again. "Louis Tomlinson." I say the love of my life's name. She leaves me alone in the small room, everything is white and too clean. I see the date but the last I remembered it was the 17th and now its the 22nd. Ive been here for five days, and Louos has been here everyday. I hope he didn't miss any school. My head is wrapped in a cloth and it hurts, it hurts really bad. The iv in my arm is sore and red, my eyes are tired and my legs are numb.
♤Louis' POV♤
Remembering five days ago haunts me and I hate thinking of. The doctors said he had a seizure and the medication clouded his brain because he took it once after not taking it for awhile, but he would be okay. I feel like it's my fault that he is hurt, I told him to take it and it caused this. Im a horrible person, I shouldn't have forced him. I just wanted him to be okay and take his pills, I didn't want him to hurt himself again, I dont know if I'm strong enough to save him again. I look up to see Harry's nurse running down the hall to the waiting room I'm in, anxiety fills my body like a glass of water that is too full.
"Louis! Louis your-" she can't breathe but she speaks in broken words. "Your boyfriend-" she still can't breathe. My boyfriend, does he think we are together? I love the thought of that. "Your boyfriend is awake and he asked for you." She finally finished and rests on the counter. Harry is finally awake, he is okay, my angel is okay. She turns to back down the hallway and I run with her, I need to see him as soon as possible, he is mine. I reach the door and she pushes it open for me, and there he is. Even in this bad state with bandaged all over him and laying in a hospital bed, he is the most attractive person on this god forsaken planet. He, he is so beautiful I could cry. "Boo" his frail voice is quiet and broken, I can tell he needs water. "Baby...I missed you." I run to him and kiss his chapped lips, I missed kissing him. "I'll leave you lovebirds to talk, I will get Anme and we will be back soon." The nurse nods and leaves, I finally get to see my boy.
"You know...you asked for your boyfriend, which was me." I keep my voice low and sweet to keep him calm, I hope he still isn't mad at me. "Im sorry I didn't realize, I had just woken up-" I stop him before the love in my heart ends. "Shhh it's okay. We can talk about it later Haz." I kiss him again before sitting on the bed with him, I need to tell him what happened to him. I kiss his forehead before speaking, "Harry, love, did the nurse tell you what happened?" He nods his head from side to side and closes his eyes and opens them back up slowly, he shouldn't be tired after sleeping for 5 days. I let out a big sigh and tell him what actually happened and not what he remembers. "Sunshine..when you took your pills a couple days ago..where you didn't take them for awhile they messed with your head and made you think things that didn't happen. You thought I was drunk and you were scared of me and...baby...I was not drunk you know I would never do that..you know why. You kept running away from me and you fell and hit your head and had a seizure..you broke a part of your skull but you will be okay..Harry I was so scared. Im so sorry for yelling at you for not taking your medicine this is my fault thay it happened Im so sorry." I end my word with laying my head on his chest, clinging to him like a baby to his mum. Im the adult, I'm supposed to take of care of him and hold him and I'm the one holding onto him for help. I know I should grow up be the mature one but right now I really can not pull myself together right now. He holds me and pushes his fingers through my oily hair to calm me. I open my mouth to talk again but all that comes out is squeaks and "im sorry." "Angel..it is not your fault. This would not have happened if I would have been responsilble and taken it like I was supposed to. Its okay that you yelled, I needed it I really did Lou. I love you so much, I need you. I need you more than anything and everything is going to be okay I promise. I am not going to hurt myself and you will not lose me. I am going to take my medicine now, I need it I know sunshine." his voice is smooth now, nice and raspy just like the velvet I am used to.