"I'm coming home as soon as I can. I love you so much."
"I love you too."
With a trembling hand, Midori put away the phone. It didn't take long before the tears began to fall. The man was sitting on the sofa in comfortable black clothes, wrapped in a blanket and cried. For hours, Midori had been waiting for Lucas to answer the phone or walk through the door. At first, he was angry when Lucas never answered, but the more time that went by, the more anxious he became. And when he called Simon, who told him that Lucas wasn't even supposed to visit them, Midori got scared. What if Lucas had left him or if Lucas had an affair? The panic paralyzed him, and when Lucas finally called, Midori had been sitting completely still on the sofa for hours. He had cried so much that his eyes were red and swollen.
During the conversation with Lucas, Midori felt dizzy. Lucas had a child with someone else. Someone Lucas had loved before him. It didn't feel real, it felt like a sick joke, but Midori knew that Lucas would never joke about something like that. Lucas wasn't cruel. No, Lucas was a kind man, and Midori could hear the distress in the alpha's trembling voice. So it had to be true, Lucas had a daughter. It scared Midori so much that he didn't know what to do. And that reaction confused him. What had happened? When had Lucas become so important to him? When Midori found out just a few days ago that he was pregnant, he panicked. The thought of having children with Lucas irritated him. But now he was filled with regret. Why had he thought so? Lucas was a wonderful man, and he would definitely be a good dad. Lucas was nothing like Midori's mother. He was kind, and he would love the child. He would never treat Midori badly. Lucas wouldn't abandon him. But when had he begun to think so? He didn't understand. What had happened to him?
Midori got up from the sofa and started walking back and forth through the living room. He had a headache and his heart was pounding like crazy. He felt anxious, shaky.
"What is going on?" Midori mumbled to himself.
He stopped walking. He needed to see Shiro, who had always managed to calm him down. Midori quickly picked up his tablet. He sat down on the couch and put on his favourite music video with Shiro. It was one of Shiro's oldest songs after he started his career as a singer. Shiro's voice was like that of an angel, and his beauty was breathtaking. But the excitement Midori used to feel was gone. He sat there staring at the screen and felt nothing. The calm, the excitement he used to feel wasn't there. Midori quickly put on another video. It was Shiro's latest video, but still nothing. He just thought about how much he missed Lucas. He even saw Lucas in front of him.
Surprised by his reaction, Midori flinched and shook his head as if to get rid of the image of Lucas, but it didn't work. Lucas was still there in front of him, smiling his lovely smile.
"Lucas," he whispered and put the tablet away.
"Your useless piece of shit."
Midori froze and looked around.
"Who's there?"
"Disgusting."
Midori was terrified. He didn't dare to talk or move. It was a voice he had never heard before, and it was so full of hatred that Midori shivered to the bone.
"So Shiro means nothing to you now? You get some alpha cock, and so now you don't want an omega anymore."
"Where are you?" Midori cried out, searching through the room.
"You're a joke, Midori. A fucking joke."
Several minutes passed, and the voice didn't return. But Midori couldn't move. The fear was paralyzing. Five minutes passed, and then Midori's legs gave way. What just happened? Who talked to him? He didn't recognize the voice. Who was it?
Midori heard the door open, and he rushed to the hall. 'Lucas. My Lucas,' he thought, throwing himself at the alpha.
I've been so worried."
Lucas took Midori in his arms and held him tightly. He repeatedly kissed the side of Midoris head.
"Please forgive me. I should have said something earlier. I'm so sorry."
"No matter what you tell me, I want you to know that I will never leave you. I love you, and you are mine."
Midori gently stroked the crying alpha's back as they walked out of the hall. As he walked past the mirror, Midori happened to look at his own reflection and what he saw there made him cringe with fear. His face was distorted, so much that he could barely see that it was his own reflection. Midori looked away in panic. With trembling legs, he walked beside Lucas, clinging to him. He told himself he had seen wrong. He was just tired.
Lucas and Midori sat down on the sofa close to each other. Lucas took a deep breath before telling Midori everything that had happened. Midori let him talk without interrupting him, and he listened closely. He tried to forget what had happened earlier. It was because of stress. Nothing more.
Lucas had a worried expression on his face when he was done, and he carefully took Midori's hands in his.
"I should have said something as soon as I found out, but I didn't know how to bring it up. I was afraid that you wouldn't want to be with me anymore. I was a coward."
Midori leaned forward and kissed Lucas' cheek.
"I understand that you're scared, but I'll be by your side through everything."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, you have to be there for her. She needs you."
Midori put his arms around Lucas' neck.
"But don't leave me. I need you too."
"I will never leave you. I love you, and you are the one I want to marry."
Midori froze and stared at Lucas, who had a gentle smile on his face. It was as if time stood still. Lucas' smile and the love he could see in those beautiful blue eyes made all the worry disappear. It healed him.
"Midori?"
"Do you really want to marry me?"
"If you will have me."
"More than anything," he said as he pulled Lucas to him and kissed him hard.
The kiss the two shared was passionate, and they didn't break it as they walked to the bedroom. There they made love. It was soft and passionate. It felt like they melted into one. Never letting go of each other's eyes.
Afterwards, Midori lay in Lucas' arms, and he felt determined. He was going to change.
"I have something I need to tell you, Lucas. About my childhood."
Lucas' heart hammered in his chest. His Kenji finally trusted him.
"My mother, Youko, was an alpha, and she was the principal of an omega school. Her wife was an alpha, and they had two teenage kids when she met my father. She was forty-one, and my father was twenty-two years old and had just started to work as a teacher. Dad was an omega. Youko quickly showed interest in Dad, but Dad rejected her. It only made Youko more interested, as if Dad was a prey she had to catch. Youko became obsessed with Dad and wanted him no matter what. She called Dad to her office and used her pheromones to make him go into heat. Then she marked him and raped him for hours. She forced Dad to keep quiet about everything, which was easy because he was terrified of her. Dad got pregnant right immediately and Youko made Dad totally dependent on her. She gave him an apartment and money each month so he could survive. Youko didn't care about us kids. All she wanted was dad. I'm the oldest, and I have seven younger siblings. Every time Youko came to rape dad, I made sure that my siblings didn't hear them. If they cried, which they often did, Youko took it out on me. She used to beat the shit out of me. She hated me just because I didn't look like Dad at all. I looked just like her. And when Dad died she stopped coming."
Lucas stared at Midori with shock and tears in his eyes. He pulled Midori in his arms and held him tight.
"I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It's awful. I wish I could have been there for you."
'Me too,' Midori thought. And he wondered how different his life would have been if he had met Lucas when he was younger.
"You don't have to answer, but how did your father die?"
"He took his life when he found out he was pregnant for the ninth time. I found him in his bedroom. He hung himself."
Lucas held him tighter, and Midori closed his eyes as he spoke.
"I loved Dad, and I don't blame him for the things I went through because it wasn't his fault. It was all Youko's fault. She ruined Dad's life. Dad was so gentle and kind, and he loved us. But he just couldn't keep going. I was fourteen when Dad killed himself, and I had to take care of my siblings. We still got money from Youko, but I had to take care of Hina, who was only a year old, so I was about to drop out of high school, but my sisters from Youko's marriage contacted me out of nowhere. Misaki and Shiori had somehow found out about us, and they helped us. They gave us somewhere to live, and we never saw Youko again. I later heard she drank herself to death after being fired from her job, and her wife divorced her. But she got away too easily. She should have been punished more for what she did to Dad."
Midori looked at Lucas with his tear-filled eyes.
"When I had to keep my siblings busy while Youko raped Dad, I turned on Shiro's movies and music so we couldn't hear their moans. My siblings loved Shiro and they never knew what Youko did to dad. That's why his music means so much to me."
Lucas understood. That explained everything, but now, it was his turn to take care of Midori. To make him happy.
"I'm here for you now. For the rest of your life."
Midori kissed Lucas' cheek.
"I know, and I'm so incredibly grateful to have met you."
They kissed for a long time, but Lucas could barely keep his eyes open, so they said good night, and it didn't take long before Lucas was sleeping. But as usual, Midori was awake. He looked at Lucas and nodded to himself. Yes, everything would be fine now. Shiro was a thing of the past. He had moved on.
"Pervert."
"Fraudsters."
Midori jerked and sat up straight. His gaze ran across the room, but he couldn't see the people that were screaming.
"Liar!" roared the voices. "Liar! Liar! Liar!"
Midori rushed out of bed and into the bathroom. Those who screamed at him didn't seem to follow. He locked the door behind him, went to the bathroom mirror, and looked around to see if anyone was there. He then looked at his reflection and froze. In the mirror, he saw someone's reflection, but it wasn't him. Or, yes, it was him, but it was his face before his plastic surgery.
Midori closed his eyes and opened them again. His old face remained. He splashed water in his face, took a deep breath and looked in the mirror again. But the reflection was still there. Midori got so dizzy that he had to hold on to the sink so he wouldn't fall over.
"He's just like his mother," he suddenly heard a bright voice just behind him say.
Midori quickly turned around. No one was there.
"Yes, he also thinks of Shiro as nothing more than a sex slave," another person agreed.
"I'm nothing like her," Midori shouted, trying to see where the speaker was hiding.
"He wanted to make Shiro his mate, even though he's also an omega. Pathetic!" The first person said again, and it sounded like it was coming from the shower. Midori ran there and pulled back the shower curtain. The shower was empty.
Midori didn't know what to say. Why had he thought he could bond with Shiro? The therapist had told him it was impossible, but he refused to believe her.
"I did love him, but I was wrong. I know that now."
"Youko also said she loved his father. See what she did to him."
"I'm nothing like my mother. Stop saying that," Midori said desperately. Why couldn't they listen?
"He never cared about Shiro. He just wanted to own him, like Shiro was a thing and not a person."
"Yes, he wanted to take Shiro away from the one he loves. To make Shiro miserable."
Midori shook his head. He knew what they were saying was true. But he regretted it.
"And he betrayed Lucas, who has been nothing but kind to Midori. Just like his mother betrayed her wife."
Midori put his hands over his ears and closed his eyes tightly. He didn't want to hear them anymore.
"I won't do it anymore. I want to be with Lucas. No one else."
"And he was thinking of killing his own child. That's sick!"
"I didn't mean it. I would never do it."
"You're lying! You disgusting, pathetic whore. Why don't you just die?" The two voices had suddenly disappeared, and the one he had heard before was back. Roaring at him with deep hatred.
"Please stop."
"You know where Lucas keeps his sleeping pills. Take them all."
"No, no, I don't want to."
"Take them! What do you think will happen if Lucas finds out the truth? He will hate you. He will leave you. Just kill yourself now."
It was no longer just one voice. Midori couldn't even count how many people surrounded him. Screaming, urging him to take his life.
Midori fell to his knees and cried. He knew they were right. He knew it was better if he was dead.
"Kenji, open the door."
Midori jerked but didn't move. The voices kept screaming.
"Please open the door."
But Midori shook his head. He didn't want Lucas to hear what they said about him. He didn't want Lucas to see his ugly face.
"I'm coming in."
Lucas managed to open the door, and he ran to Midori, who was sitting on the floor and took the crying man in his arms.
"Baby, what happened?"
"Don't listen to them, and close your eyes. Please, don't look at me!" Midori tried to hide his face by pressing it against Lucas' bare chest, and he put his hands over Lucas' ears.
Midori trembled violently in Lucas' arms.
"Who were you talking to?" Lucas asked, both confused and worried, but it was as if Midori didn't hear him.
"I love you. Don't throw me away. I will do better. I promise."
"Kenji, you need to calm down. Talk to me. Why are you saying these things?"
Midori looked up. His eyes were huge, and he was pale and trembling.
"I don't know what I'm doing anymore," Midori whispered in a faint, trembling voice.
"Come on, Kenji, let's go to bed. It's been a long day. I promise you will feel better tomorrow."
Midori didn't respond. But he didn't object when Lucas gently took him in his arms and carried him to the bedroom. Lucas managed to keep quiet even though his hands hurt a lot. Midori held on to Lucas as if he would die if he didn't, and he didn't let go when Lucas laid him on the bed. Lucas got down next to the weeping Midori, holding him in his arms.
"Does it hurt anywhere?"
Midori shook his head.
"Did something happen?"
Midori shook his head again.
"What can I do?"
"Hold me," Midori sobbed in a small voice.
And Lucas did. He spoke slowly and repeated that everything would be fine as he continued to stroke Midori's hair. In Lucas' safe embrace, it didn't take long before Midori began to calm down and finally fell asleep.
For most of the night, Lucas didn't move from Midori's side. Lucas tried to calm down, but it was difficult. He had seen people behave like this before. When he was in rehab, and he saw people go through withdrawal. Lucas had heard people screaming in panic when they saw things that didn't exist or when they heard voices that told them to hurt themself. But Midori didn't take drugs. Lucas was sure of it. It had to be because of too much stress. It had to be.