daphneanmarcia

Dazzle is a young teen girl with a beautiful face and a kind heart. She is such a angel and a loyal friend but not the peoples around her.

Bullied by school mates, Harassed by her teachers, seeing all her friend being abused...Even after seeing all this, she couldn't do anything.

Why? Because the city where she lived gives respect and rights only to men. 

If a woman talks backs or rebels, it is her end. End of her life and dignity.

But not anymore. She has the power of karma by her side.

Going through continuous assaults and facing deaths of her loved ones, made her a heartless bitch.

"WOMAN'S AREN'T SUPPOSED TO UPSET A MEN? THEN WHY NOT KILL THEM INSTEAD?" Dazzle thought 

Read more to find Dazzle's journey from a weak angel to a deadly demoness.


Will she be a psychopath who devours blood or just revenge?

I say the descriptions could a bit more flavor but characters are decent.

See this! I just gifted the story: Balloon

See this! I just gifted the story: Lollipop

Parents : Her parent were killed in a car accidents

Character : unpredictable, sensitive

Dazzle has a long black, soft hair, with dark eyes balls. She is kindhearted but always get in trouble because of her pretty face and good-looking structure.

Noah is a blonde haired, handsome teen. He is sweet and funny but when it comes to his sister or friend, he is a totally different person. He likes to end things short and sweet.

Parents : His father died when he was young and mother is a prostitute but it is unknown.

Liam has a silky and black hair, with equally dark eyes balls. He was usually a friendly person but life made him cold and hard.

Parents : Her parent are rich and has a brother, Noah

Lisa is a cute but bossy teen with brown hair. She is sweet to her friends but to those who hurt her, she is a total mean girl. She is close to Dazzle and loves her like her own sister.

Me, as a new reader loved it. I love these mysterious stories. Most of the gangster stories are based on male leads but I loved how you chose female and KIDS... I could relate this story because it is about a **** girl. I noticed some grammar error but for your age it is splendid. By each chapter your grammar is improving too. I think I am in love with Noah author 😅.

I like the idea of the main character fighting back against the rules of their society. It makes for an interesting premise and can go a variety of ways. In the 5 chapters I have read, I felt that the character description were quite devoid of charm and that statement can go for most of what I've read. 

Emotions aren't shown, but told directly to the reader. (Ex: Liam was angry, Dazzle was shocked, Dazzle was scared, etc.) You want to describe their emotions, not tell them. For example, you could say Liam's blood boiled like lava instead of using the word angry.

The text was also very bland at times since the word choices were basic. I recommend a thesaurus to spice up your story. Overall, this novel has a very unique premise and that's the first step to fame. Work on what I said and I can assure you'll gain massive popularity.

Intriguing and enrapturing! I could relate to and understand Dazzle, her struggles and the wrongs done to her. Revenge isn't an healthy path in life but I can enjoy a good book centered around it. 

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Most awesome book ever
The thriller was at peak 
Everyday I come to check if u posted next chapter. 
Nice work All the best 
U r doing good


The story is really intriguing! I love the flow of the story and it makes me look forward to the next chapter! It makes me wonder who's going to die next 😂 Good job author! 😍

Intriguing, this book is so very interesting. The title is what hooked me in the first place, and kudos to the author for writing such a wonderful book[img=recommend]

This novel is extremely intriguing, the title is catchy, and I can't believe I found this book only today. Kudos to the author. [img=recommend]

Nice work author, there were some grammar errors but your book was really captivating! Keep writing and Don't give up! I like the way you explain the characters and stuff!!!!

I do honest reviews. Always. So, sorry if you feel bad. I really liked the story. It had a feel that the middle aged century was brought into a modern world story. The struggles of a young girl living a life in the shadows of the males. I love the concept. But i am pretty dissatisfied by the grammar. I, as a new reader and writer, look for the grammar and vocabulary first. Vocabulary was on point but the grammar needs to be edited thoroughly. 
 

Sis, you gotta check that grammar and do some thorough editing. The story is very intriguing. I also like the way the main characters were explained before but you missed out jenny. 

Other than that the story is nice and I have added it to my library as well.

this litterally got me hooked! very good story! i would recommend this to anybodu who will ask me which story i read is amazing! i would definitely add this to my collection!

I don't see any problems there and all. But, the small things like good grammar (e.g. stop points and captials etc) should be checked. These stuff could get new readers to turn away thinking that 'oh, it has bad grammar so the next chapters going to be bad or something' but that's my opinion. Good Work!

The world background description is superb. The scenes are well described and written. The characters are nicely done. Great job author, keep up the good work 🤗

The storyline and the blurb is great! It will make you hooked up to the first chapter of it! Revenge is the best part, but it is a dangerous thing to do really! Great job! 

Well, your storyline is superb. I loved it. The process’s kind of obscure and a touch of thriller. I liked reading it. The chapters look impressive. Suggested to everyone.
Suggestions which I would like to address is, firstly, make your paragraphs a little quick. Prolix paragraphs make readers misplace their interest. Secondly, seek to write more dialogues that don't conduct everything in paragraphs. When a reader reads the dialogue with a small classification of how it is maintained, the reader can visualize individually and all dialogue. Thirdly, write explanatory paragraphs, like how the school of Dazzle looked like or how she looked like. Characterization is necessary for a novel. Try to explain the person and place to make readers visualize them. Fourthly, don't leave a space between a word and punctuation. That is all I want to answer… All the fittest for your forthcoming chapters.


Well, your storyline is superb I liked it. The way it is kind of mysterious and a bit of thriller I liked reading it. The chapters seem interesting. Recommended to everyone.

Suggestions which I would like to give is, firstly, make your paragraphs a bit short. Lengthy paragraphs make readers lose their interest. Secondly, try to write more dialogues don't convey everything in paragraphs. When a reader reads the dialogue with a small description of how it is said, the reader can visualize each and every dialogue. Thirdly, write descriptive paragraphs, like how the school of Dazzle looked like or how she looked like. Description of is necessary for a novel. Try to describe the person and place to make readers visualize them. Fourthly, don't leave a space between a word and punctuation. That is all I want to say..

All the best for your upcoming chapters :)

it was a nice story of a poor girl,facing many problems all together in a city which doesn't allow girls with much freedom. oops i shouldn't give spoilers, you guys have a look at it, it's a good story with little errors.

Pretty nice intro to your book! Be sure you write more everyday! Your descriptions is quiet well too! Must sure to change up the beginning of sentences

Quoting Cruella, "They say there are five stages of grief. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Well, I’d like to add one more. Revenge."
I only started reading this book, but I am in awe with Dazzle and her personality!
Keep Up The Great Work, Author!!

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Table of contents

Volume 1 :The start

Chapter 1 - Main characters