Today I start my first classes. I spend all yesterday unpacking and getting to know my roommate. She seems very nice, so that's at least a relief. Her name is Emily and she's from Arizona. We have plans to explore the enormous campus together this weekend together.
As I make my way towards my first class, I stop by a small coffee shop. I need coffee to get myself going. I'm honestly useless without it.
I'm one of the first people in the classroom when I arrive. The professor is sitting on a chair at the front, just waiting for people to arrive.
*****
It's 3 PM and I am towards my last class of the day. I will say, college is definitely different from high school, but I like it. It's not as scary as I had imagined.
I get situated close to the hall about halfway down, so I'm sitting in the middle of the classroom. This way I won't attract too much attention to myself, but I can also listen and participate in the lection.
People scurry inside and find a place to sit.
Soon there are only 4 seats left. 2 at the front, 1 at the back corner beside some nasty guy, and 1 beside me. Almost everybody came in pairs, so they didn't wanna you know split up. That's why there are only single seats left. This is a high-level class, so that's probably why everybody knows each other. Because they aren't freshmen.
Anyways, 2 minutes into class the door swings open. A tall, lean boy with dark-brown hair, eyes so dark that they're almost black, and with a long scar from his eyebrow down to his chin walks in.
Holy moly! He looks scary to say at least.
The teacher only spares him a glance before sighing, "Take a seat, Dimitri."
Dimitri… interesting name. It doesn't sound American.
Dimitri scans the room for free seats. First, he looks at the front rows but quickly scurries on to the creepy guy in the corner. Guess it's not there either. Wait, then there's only one seat left and that's beside me. Shit, shit, shit. His eyes land on me and he gives me a once over. I guess he's satisfied because he makes his way towards me and sits in the seat next to mine. I've never had a guy sit this close to me. I guess there wasn't much of a choice, but it still makes me nervous. He gets himself comfortable in the chair, but he doesn't say anything or introduce himself. Rude.
Some minutes into the lecture, I can hear Dimitri ask someone for a pen, as I start to take notes.
"Did you hear me?" he says again, but this time I notice an accent in his voice. Is that- is that a Russian accent?
"I asked you a question," he says yet again, but this time he nudges me. Oh no, he nudged me. Was he asking me for a pen?
"I'm sorry. Is it me you were talking to?" I ask him. My voice is teeny weeny. I feel very intimidated by his whole demeanor.
"Yes, I was talking to you. Are you deaf or something? I asked you if I could borrow a pen," he scuffs, but with annoyance in his voice.
I'm offended about the deaf comment and the rude attitude.
"I didn't think you were talking to me, and yes, you can borrow a pen," I say as I open my bag to find a pen for him.
I hold the pen out for him, before saying, "And I don't appreciate the comment about deafness, thank you very much." Now I was the one annoyed.
He grunts but takes the pen anyways. God, he is rude. I'm definitely going to make sure, that I don't sit next to him tomorrow. I definitely don't like this boy, but at least I can just pretend he's not here. It is a big campus, after all, it's not like I'm going to see him everywhere. But then again, I guess he is better than a creepy guy in the corner.
5 minutes before the class ends Dimitri nudges me again.
"What is it?" I ask him but with no annoyance in my voice this time. I'm honestly too tired to stay mad at a complete stranger for over an hour.
"Here is your pen."
How can someone say, a simple sentence like, that so ice-cold? I can definitely confirm, that he isn't like the people I'm usually around. But again, the only person I hang out with is my dad, and now Emily.
"Thanks," I tell him and accept the pen.
All this over a frickin' pen.
*****
It is currently 10 PM. Emily and I have just gotten back from the grocery store. We've bought a lot of snacks, some cereal, milk, mac and cheese, and Gatorade. You know the essentials. There is a cafeteria, but come on, we need these things close to us.
"Do you have my phone?" I ask her.
"Nope, why?"
"Oh shit, I think I left it at the store. Crap. I have to go back," I tell her.
"Oh, do you want me to go with you?" She asks me.
"No, no. It's just a 15 min trip. I'll be fine," I say. Even though I don't feel safe walking alone this late at night, I know she has a lot of work to do.
"At least take this with you," she says and hands me a pepper-spray.
This would actually make me feel safer.
I accept the spray and make my way outside. I hold the pepper-spray tight in my hand. There is absolutely no one out here, but that's not making me feel any safer. Actually the quite opposite.
I feel relieved when I reach the store. The cashier had put it in a safe for me, in case I came back. I quickly thank her as I grab it, and make my way back outside.
When I'm about halfway home, I hear footsteps behind me. My entire body tenses up and I squeeze the spray even tighter. The steps are only a few feet behind me now, so I make an impulse decision. I turn 180º and spray the person right in the eye. I don't even see who it is, I just spray like a crazy person.
"For fucks sake! What did you do?" A very angry voice asks me. Holy shit! That is definitely Dimitri. I can recognize that accent anywhere after our discussion in class today.
"Holy shit. I'm so sorry. I thought you were a burglar or a rapist following me," I try to apologize.
"Shut the fuck up!" He yells, making me flinch. It quickly shut my mouth up though. I didn't like being talked to like that, but then again, I just sprayed him in the eyes with a fuckin' pepper-spray.
He stands there for about 10 minutes and holds himself to his eyes while swearing under his breath. I don't know if I should stay or go, but in the end, I decide to stay. It would definitely be rude to just walk away, after this. Emily is probably getting worried back at the dorm by now.
5 more minutes past and he tries to open his eyes. After a little, he succeeds and his eyes meet mine. I swear, I stop breathing.
There is so much hatred in that look. I can't even describe it. I'm starting to regret the decision about staying. I just hope he won't kill me.
"I'm really sorry, Dimitri," I tell him again, even though I doubt it will help anything.
He just scuffs and begins to walk away.
Before I have time to react, my feet pulls me along with him. We don't talk to each other, just walk in silence.
I know I have to turn left, as we get closer to the buildings. I don't know if he's also a freshman. He probably isn't since the teacher knows his name, in that class, we have together. But you never know. When he starts turning right, I get my answer. He is heading toward the other dorm rooms for the upperclassmen.
I stop him from walking away, by saying, "Look, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to, you know, hurt your eyes. I just got paranoid and reacted to a dumb impulse decision. This doesn't mean we have to be friends or anything, but can you at least say that we're cool? I really didn't mean to it."
"No."
And with that, he walks away.
Jesus, what's up in his ass? Okay, maybe pepper-spray in his eyes, but that's not the point. I tried to apologize, and if he can't accept it, then there's nothing I can do about it.
I quickly make my way towards my own dorm. When I arrive, Emily jumps up in my face.
"I thought you got kidnapped. Do you realize you were gone 30 minutes?!" She yells.
"I'm really sorry! Nothing happened, I just ran into a little trouble. Kinda pepper-sprayed an innocent guy from my class," I tell her.
"You did what?"
"I thought he was a burglar or a rapist. I acted on instinct," I tell her embarrassed and jump into bed. I throw my jeans and bra off and decide, just to sleep in my t-shirt. I quickly set my alarm and try to fall asleep. I think Emily has realized how tired I am because she lets the topic go. For now anyway.