Chereads / Broken Mate's / Chapter 18 - Alone

Chapter 18 - Alone

My eyes open but it takes a moment to realise that I was still on the sofa in the front room and I look up to see one of the older female pack members above me with a gentle smile

"I thought you might like waking before all of the pack come for breakfast would you like to join us?" She asks but I give her a shake of my head not feeling any appetite and then I went straight over to the hospital and I sat with Alex whose condition still hasn't changed every day I would sit there feeling so lost not being able to do anything until today. I'm sitting in the hospital room as usual and I sit by her bed and talking her through everything

"Everyone in the pack is better of course except you but you'll get better won't you" I say and as I go to continue the door behind me opens

"Sandra I'm not really hungry today either" To be honest I don't really remember the last time i ate anything I'm pretty sure it was the dinner but I wasn't really concerned

"Really Emmy we both know Alpha will kill me if you don't eat" I turn and realise it wasn't the usual tall nurse that it usual but rather Indigo standing there with her slight bump which she rubs gently with her hand and in her other sits a tray of fruits and other things "I know you don't feel hungry rey but you might be" I shake my head turning away from her

"I'm not I'm not hungry I'm not" almost as if I was trying to convince myself of the fact that I wasn't My want for food had gone out of the window it simply had not yet appealed to me once so I just chose to ignore it

"I know but there's something we need to talk about although it should probably be my mate but I wanted to talk you" She says and I look up at her as she sat across from me on the other side of Alex" the pack is struggling and Lorcan can't deal with it alone"

"You... he wants my help?"

"You're the Luna Emmy whether you've been introduced formally or not, the way you took care of us all during the fight the way when you were in agony you pushed it aside and made sure everything was prepared for them getting back the way you practically flew down the stairs when that girl screamed" She says with a slight chuckle "You are our Luna, Melody keeps telling everyone how you made her feel better and less alone, The way you make breakfast for everyone else" She says looking into my eyes

I let out a defeated sigh "I can't I have to be here with her " I say looking at my mate her pale skin and limp hands were engraved into my brain just like her limp body

"She is constantly surrounded by people who love her and care for her here" She says grabbing my hand"We need you and she won't mind If you leave for a bit, Please Emmy Lorcan hasn't slept since either he has no time to I barely see him and I need him too" I take this moment to really look at her and I take in the deep circles under her eyes and the obvious frown on her face the nervous bite of her lip and she watches me

"ok just tell me what I need to do" She lets out and crystal-clear sigh of relief at my acceptance and She stands

"I'll meet you outside in a few moments okay?" She asks and I mutter a Quick yes before turning my full attention back to my mate as she walks out

"I'll be back okay I promise" I say my voice wobbling slightly and I place a kiss gently on her forehead the breathing tube in her mouth doesn't allow me to kiss her properly and I walk to the door but as I open it I turn back "Please don't leave me"

I let out quietly before shutting the door behind me and I give a slight smile to Indigo who was sitting on one of the seats outside the room looking at me with a warm hearted smile and she wraps her arm around my forearm and begins to walk me out of the hospital and I see some of the pack give me worried glances and shocked looks at the fact I had left which I don't usually do. We arrive back at the pack house and I smile at the members who greet me and I say thanks to one of the members who hand me an apple on my way past and I take a bite out of it as we make our way up to the office and she stands outside of Alex's office as we enter I see Lorcan sitting at her desk which angers me slightly but I knew she had all of the work on her desk but what troubles me the most is that he was so focused on the work that he didn't even know his own mate had walked in

"Lorcan I brought you some help " At this he finally looks up and he gives a bright grin to his mate before looking at me and I watch as the tension leaves his body and in that split moment, I decide what I was about to do

"Lorcan go spend the day with your mate I'll be okay here" He looks at me questioningly "You've been so buried in work neither of you have properly slept and I doubt you've eaten and she needs you so go spend some time with her" He looks over at Indigo before nodding at me and I am surprised when I feel Indigo hug me and I give her a slight hug before moving away from her and sitting where Lorcan was just sitting

"No offense Luna but do you know what you're doing?" I let out a small laugh

"Zane was often too lazy for his paperwork so he would make me do it, I basically ran that pack but he got all the glory" I say whilst staring at the paperwork on my desk noticing the school needs some work done and this is apparently the third time they've asked so I start signing and making my way through it

"He's dead you know" Lorcan says almost as if he was asking me about whether I knew

"I know"

I say looking up at him he simply turns and walk out and I can hear him and Indigo talking whilst they made their way wherever they were going.I stare down at the work that I have to get done and Start flipping through the pages and signing each one and I hadn't realised the time when I finally finishes and I see its well into the night and I look up at the night sky and I see the stars but its like they don't feel the same, its like the moment she slipped into that painful coma that keeps her from me the stars don't mean the same as they used to. They don't shine like they used to but I push the feeling away as I sit back at the desk but deciding to finish the work I had set aside for tomorrow rather than leave it, Signing each piece as I worked through it then organising it into the right pile and once again I lost track of the time and i turned to see the sun rising over the forest and I hear the door open behind me and I see Lorcan watching me with a surprised look on his face

"Oh um I didn't exactly expect to see you in here its really early" He says looking at me curiously "You getting a head start on today's work?" at this is blush slightly knowing i had finished the next week's worth of work that my mate was behind on "Erm no actually i've already finished that and I'm completely caught up until about next tuesday" his jaw drop as I finish and now its my turn to look at him curiously

"how it usually takes us forever to finish that much work how did you, wait have you even slept at all?" He asks me

"No I wasn't sleeping much in the first place it was usually only an hour or two anyway so it doesn't really affect me" I shrug

"Luna this isn't healthy you haven't slept you haven't eaten at all you can not keep going like this Emmy" I look up at him from the spot I was staring at on the desk and i sigh.

"I don't have much want to do anything, the thought of food repulses me and I haven't been able to sleep without her and the nurses wont let me stay overnight so i Just don't" I say finally sitting back down onto the desk chair "Nothings the same without her, she gave me the confidence to talk to people she always let me know that it was going to be okay no matter what. I get nightmares everytime I close my eyes she kept them away"

"Luna have you even went home?"

I just shake my head rather than responding

"Why?"He asks me

"I tried at one point I did try but I took one smell of her scent and it had me breaking down on the doorstep in the pouring rain someone brings me fresh clothes but other than that I can't I just cant shes my everything without her im worthless" "Luna you are still you and she is still here she isn't dead, You with or without her you are still the same loving caring and hardworking person you always have been" I sigh knowing he was right but the nagging part of my brain constantly told me i wasn't the same without her

"What do I do now?" I say looking at him and he gives me a soft before answering with a simple"relax" and I nod my head and open my mouth to speak again before the phone rings so I pick it up to answer it "Hello Luna of the Graycrown pack speaking how may I help you?"

"Hey Emmeline Its me Blake from the Council?"He says asking if I remembered him"Where is Alexandra?" "Shes um erm in the hospital right now but what can I do?" "oh I'm sorry to here that is everything okay?" He asks

"Hopefully It will be but its all in the mist right now" I hear him simply hum in response "Well what can I do for you Blake?"

"Well I think I might know who is your parents" "WHAT?" I say my voice reaching a whole different octave "Who when how what?" I sat once again barely comprehending the words that came out of his mouth.

"Emmy that picture you showed us when the council was there but before we talk more about this I think we should do this in person I can be in your pack within the next few days" I immediately agree and hang up the phone and I look up surprised to still see Lorcan there"I might find out who my parents are" I say answering the elephant in the room and his eyebrows spring up in shock

"What who?" He says seemingly in the same state of shock as I was.

"I don't really know but Blake phoned me and said he recognized the photo i had with me" I say as the nerves begin building and tears spring to my eyes "What am I supposed to do we were supposed to do it together"

"you're not alone you've got people here and I know we aren't the same as your mate but we are as supportive as possible" I just nod and he takes it as his que to leave