Akira tucked Takumi underneath the duvet.
"Goodnight," Takumi said sleepily.
"Goodnight." Akira kissed his forehead, eliciting a murmur of approval.
He rested his head on a propped elbow and watched as his best friend, now lover, fell into deep sleep. Overtaken by remnants of a massive hangover and spillovers of an emotionally charged day.
A day which still astonished Akira.
Every thought in his mind had vanished with that kiss.
Slow and sweet. Sealing a vow. Careful because it was precious.
They only broke the kiss for unsteady breaths of air.
The next step would have been a quick descend into passion but it felt right to leave it there.
Perhaps it was also only right that things were a little awkward after that.
They have known each other for so long. Been together for a third of their lives.
Never have they been so overly conscious of each other's presence. They nearly jumped when they accidentally touched, fumbled over words and tried hard (and failed) not to stare too much.
The tension only broke during supper. Akira chuckled quietly when he recalled the ridiculous conversation.
"I forgot to ask. Don't you have work tomorrow?" Takumi queried.
"Taking tomorrow off," Akira replied. It was Friday anyway and he was in no mood to be in the office, uncharacteristic as it was.
"Great! I've nothing on too," Takumi said brightly.
Normally, they would just make plans. Now silence stretched between them.
"So tonight-"
"About tonight-"
They stared at each other before breaking into laughter.
"We're being stupid," Takumi managed while holding his stomach.
"We are," Akira agreed.
Somehow that relaxed them considerably. Clumsiness replaced by comfort tinged with excitement.
"I need to go back and get some clean clothes," Akira told him.
"I'm coming with you," Takumi declared and then a little shyly, "Actually…stay at yours?"
Akira nodded and reached out to hold his hand.
By the time they arrived at his apartment and despite the early hours, Takumi was visibly tired.
They didn't discuss the arrangement before heading to his bed, instead of using the spare bedroom. It was as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
The mere thought warmed Akira before guilt filled him.
He knew that he shouldn't have waited until now. He also knew that he had hurt Takumi along the way.
When he finally gathered enough courage to confess, it was Takumi who did so first. Unequivocally.
It was likely the most forward, unfiltered, honest declaration of love that one could receive.
Akira wasn't sure he deserved it.
Nevertheless, the only way was to look forward, especially when there was so much to look forward to.
In the darkness, with only the bright lights of the city outside seeping through the curtains, he could make out the contours of Takumi's face.
He had always thought Takumi to be beautiful. That was a fact.
But beauty did not compare to the parts of his heart which Takumi owned.
Takumi taught Akira that he did, in fact, possess the capacity to love.
"I swear I will make it up to you," Akira whispered.
xxxxxxx
When his eyes opened, not quite awake, it was still before dawn and Takumi found himself nestled against Akira. A protective arm around him.
He heard Akira's calm breathing. Felt the warmth of the body next to him.
Takumi wanted more and pressed himself closer.
A stir underneath. A sleepy murmur. "Takumi."
A tilt of their faces. Awkward angles smoothened by a kiss.
Takumi sighed and didn't want it to end.
Akira didn't let it end. He pushed Takumi onto his back and bent down to kiss him again.
In the haze of sleep, intimate.
Also maddeningly unreal. And it pushed them to deepen each touch.
Whether it was breaking off for short breaths of air before locking their mouths again. Or trying to close the space between their bodies.
Takumi moaned when Akira's lip trailed down his neck. He drew in a sharp breath when Akira sucked his throat.
Somewhere in the back of his fuzzy brain, he was aware of Akira's weight pinning him down. Aware of hands which roamed underneath their shirts. Aware of how broad Akira's back was when Takumi encircled his arms around him.
He arched when Akira suddenly bit his neck.
Hardness rubbed against each other.
It was like a jolt, and their eyes flew open as if both had woken up from a dream.
Breathing hard. Eyes locked.
Even in the dimness of the room, Akira looked at him with such need.
If this was a dream, Takumi never wanted to wake up.
"Do you want to?" Akira whispered. So quietly even if the storm in his eyes remained.
A million distorted thoughts threatened to drown Takumi. Screaming yes that this was always what he wanted and holding him back with a past nightmare he forcefully dismissed.
He swallowed and stammered, "Y-yes."
Akira studied Takumi for a moment, as if deciding.
Takumi couldn't bear it. He whispered, "Show me."
Show me how it should be. Between lovers. With the only person who could touch me.
I want to know that I could be loved.
Takumi wanted to tell Akira but the words wouldn't form.
Yet Akira understood. He always had and, in this moment, that understanding gave way to a caress of Takumi's hair.
"Look at me."
This time, when their lips met, it was urgent. Something unraveled, something more had to be released.
Akira didn't allow him to think. Only feel.
At some point, Takumi found their tops divested, Akira nibbling at his nipple and causing him to gasp. Tongue swirling at the tips, bringing forth a pleasure Takumi hadn't felt before.
Until a hand reached inside and fondled him.
Takumi jerked. "Akira!"
There was a part of him that was so damn embarrassed. Quickly cast aside by how awfully good he felt.
So much so that he lifted himself helpfully for Akira to remove his pants. Moaned nonsensical noises as he was stroked.
Nearly screamed when Akira inserted fingers inside him and trailed kisses across his stomach. He struggled to hold onto anything.
Even then, Akira's words were gentle.
He kept telling Takumi to look at him. Brushed away any shyness with a kiss here and there. He told Takumi that he loved him.
The sex in his actions and the sweetness in his words nearly undid Takumi.
"I-I'm losing my mind!" His voice frantic.
"I've lost mine," Akira replied hoarsely and stretched him further.
It drove Takumi close to the edge of a cliff. Only now, he wanted to jump into wherever it would lead him. He felt so raw and wet. He wanted to feel even more.
He tried to hold, almost claw Akira's back closer.
His lover saw his need and withdrew his fingers.
He parted Takumi's legs wider, lifting his knees for access.
Takumi couldn't breathe when Akira entered him slowly, carefully. He was torn apart and put together. Inch by inch.
Akira's control was beyond him. The taut expression and gritted teeth expressed the edge he was on too. It turned Takumi on so damn much.
But he didn't have time to think further either because he was consumed by the knowledge and sensation that this man was inside him.
Inside. Him.
Then Akira started moving and Takumi lost everything sane and good.
In its place, he might have mewled incoherently with every thrust. Might have also gasped Akira's name over and over. Thrusted his own hips to meet the man's cock literally invading him.
He almost came when Akira started to stroke him again. Whispered into his ear about how tight he was, how perfect he felt.
This was insane. Nothing should feel this insanely pleasurable.
To see this man, usually so taciturn and reserved, lost in passion and desire. Takumi flung himself over that cliff.
He climaxed with a burst inside him. A wave of dizziness swept over. He wanted to come again when Akira did soon after and collapsed onto him.
They stayed silent for a while. Panting amidst the musky odor of sex and sweat.
Akira recovered first and pulled himself out. Takumi let out a protest, despite himself.
Akira brushed away a strand of wet hair from Takumi's forehead. Kissed his left eye. Gazed at him with an affection that caused Takumi to almost tear up.
"How are you feeling?" he asked.
Takumi couldn't quite answer. Like his heart might just explode? Or that his body was in flames? Or that he loved Akira so damn much that his vocabulary failed him?
"Y-you should show me more," he finally whispered.
Akira smiled, somewhere between a sexy smirk and a fondness that made Takumi's heart stop.
Instead of replying, he kissed Takumi again. Deep and almost reverent.
Outside, dawn had finally arrived and sunlight was filtering into the room. As if welcoming them to a new beginning.
When they parted, they were both smiling.