As my life flashed before my eyes, the memory cleared up like a fog on a mountain. The vision of the past 20 years replayed as a vivid yet murky daydream. My surroundings were moving in slow motion. I couldn't hear anything as the adrenaline was pumping in a frenzy along my veins. Shouts and screaming noises turned into muffled and intangible mumbling. My body felt cold, but I wasn't freezing.
If I had to describe it, I would say imagine having pins and needles all over your body, but you felt numb at the same time. Your skin was yours, but it felt far away. You felt sleepy, but you knew you shouldn't sleep because you might not wake up.
I didn't realize what had just happened in the past three seconds that felt like two decades. My body refused to move. It took so much energy just to turn my hand to see if I could wiggle my fingers. My wrists were still tied to the hospital chair. After what felt like hours, I could finally see the dagger jutting out of my stomach.
A huge rose petal grew from the wound and it kept expanding into my shirt and eventually my pants. I started to feel like it was getting harder to breath. As if I was drowning without any water around me.
Every time I inhaled; a lighting just zapped me on my stomach. The sticky and warm blood latched onto my skin like a second skin. I tried to look up to make sure she hadn't hurt my friends.
I didn't know what I could have done, but I would never forgive her if she was to harm any of them. Not even as small as a prick of a needle. Though my sight was slowed down, my hearing was somehow amplified. I could hear those treacherous wooden slippers retracting away from me. That's right b*tch, you better run away.
"Y-you made me do this…" her voice shaking horribly.
I knew I had no time to see her run towards the exit. So, I decided to focus and spent the last of my energy to have one last look at my loyal, lovely, and good-hearted true friend. My tunnel vision was solely on his pretty face. Even with tears running down his face, he still looked as sweet as ever. Who knew I still had the strength to smile in a situation like this?
The frame of my view changed again. Something allowed me to see the bigger picture of the scenery. Kelly ran for the door, but her speed was no match for Tadashi's ultrasonic reflexes. He grabbed the revolver out of Hiro's pants pocket, loaded a bullet and aimed for Kelly's leg.
* BANG! *
I saw the round-tipped bullet carved the air around it as it travelled straight for its target. Tadashi walked off to the window and made a call as Kelly's favorite son lunged at her to make sure she was completely immobilized. A huge weight had been lifted off my chest, we put a stop to her without harming Hiro's dad. They would win the case against her for sure.
My head felt heavy all of a sudden. It just fell without my permission. I couldn't feel much of my body anymore. At least the stab wound wasn't hurting anymore. But the room felt colder and brighter than before. There were still so much I had to do and say to people.
My parents, my friends, Kirby, my employers, and most importantly, Koshiro; my most treasured friend. Who could have guessed it would end like this? You falling for me and me dying for you. I still hadn't won any debate competition because of you, but I had forgiven you for it. Maybe in the next life we got to meet again.
You asked me once, if I believed in reincarnation. Now I understood why people would want to believe that it was real. I understood the yearning for a second chance. Another shot at life.
People thought that they get to read the book and get a different ending. But the bitter truth was that no story starts in the middle, and we didn't get to choose whose book we get to live in.
But just for today, I naively believed in a better story. Maybe I would be born into a family with two parents or raised by a couple of fishmongers. I wouldn't care about how my next story began as long as I get to have you written in it, I would be satisfied.
That was weird, I felt the strain on my wrist disappeared. There it was again! The muffled screaming! It was like the sound my dad made when he tried to whisper to me underwater. The air bubbles always tickled me. Then I felt my body getting lifted. My hands were shaking, and I couldn't make it stop. I wasn't even sure if my eyes were opened or closed.
I felt something warm wrapping itself on my hand. I couldn't return the gesture however hard I tried. My eyelids were shut like a heavy metal gate, but I refused to give up just yet. A shadow sat next to me; its face fixated on mine. Warm tears rained over me and onto my cheeks. I managed to lift one of my hand to his cheek and my vision cleared up.
His brown and glimmering eyes were covered full of tears. Just like the ones on my mom's eyes that day. But why was he sad? Did I disappoint him again? Had I failed to protect him again? His whimpers broke my heart. What was going to happen to me? Why was he sobbing? We should be celebrating the end of our successful case. We could eat hotpot peacefully again.
The excruciating pain came back. I curled up as my muscles contracted to minimize the sensation. I tried to look down. To my surprise, Roberto was pressing on my wound to prevent more blood from oozing out. More steps. More people rushing into the room. Where are they taking me?
"Hey, hey! Don't look at it, keep looking at me. Stay with me. Ren, please," that buttery voice of his warmed my body.
So, that's why. I might die and this would be it. I guess this was the end of my book. A bitter-sweet ending. Do I deserve a better one? Could it have been different? No, I wouldn't have it any other way.
Having you in this short book had been a blessing; a miracle. You taught me that it was okay to be vulnerable because you would be there to protect me. But it was time to return the favor. And for all the memorable memories you had given me, I want to say:
"Thank you."