My eyes lock on his and my body tenses as he slowly lowers my hand to drop it. I'm hypnotized and I have forgotten how to move. Always being calm, cool, and casual, this lapse functionality has my head spinning; which is totally not helping me at the moment.
I finally break eye contact to mumble bye, as open my car door to make a quick get away. I pull away from the parking lot pretty sure I left Dane right where he stood.
"What the heck was that," I literally spit out to myself, shaking the last remaining fog from my head. I adjust my playlist to help clear my head and order my thoughts.
How did Dane go from burning holes of hatred into me last Sunday, to now planning on meeting for lunch in two days? He was so kind and attentive during the walk. It's hard to believe that he could even look at me like he did last week. Am I even sure that he is the same person?
Of course, he is! Those tattoos are a dead giveaway. Stop, doubting yourself, Summer.
Those tattoos... and those arms... the way he looked in those jeans. My brain flits to every physical detail it can bring up. I never really thought I had a "type" before, before seeing him. Dane, is definitely what I like though. Tall, he must be 6'2"-6'3", dark cropped hair, dark steely eyes that can warm to a light blue when he smiles. I do love a good jeans and t-shirt for myself and he definitely wore those well. And his five o'clock shadow would make anyone weak in the knees.
I smile to myself and put the back of my hand to myself. Could I actually, potentially, be interested in a guy? It's been so long since someone has caught my attention. There have been guys that I thought were attractive, but I don't know, they were just lacking something. This click, something that registers on a special wavelength for me.
Knowing that I will never be able to focus on the To-Do list that I set for myself today, I head in the direction of my favorite surf spot. I brought my boards and wetsuit on the off chance that I would have the urge to paddle out.
It's probably not the best idea to paddle out by myself as often as I do, but I don't care. If I waited for someone to surf with me on a regular basis I would never paddle out. It's Santa Cruz, so there's almost always someone out at the main breaks no matter what. Plus, I have met so many people while waiting for the next set to come. It's been a great place for me to find friends outside school.
The ocean also has always been one of those places that can help clear my head. The rush, clarity, and mental acuity I have when riding a wave is unlike any other moment in time. The focus at the task at hand needed to enjoy a great wave is all part of the experience.
Not to mention the time between sets, where I can close my eyes, breathe in deep, and feel my body and mind connect to the world around me. The world seems like such a simpler place when out in the ocean. I love the feel of my board beneath me as it moves to the dance of the ocean. That feeling sometimes will stay with me even after I paddle back in and I can feel the ocean in my soul pushing out and pulling back in, it's divine.
I pull over to park. I walk over to scout the waves and all looks good. It's November, so there's not as many people who paddle out as there are during the Summer time. Still a good amount of people though. Looks like a good time.
I walk back to the car, quickly change, and pull my board off the roof rack. I quickly rub some coconut smelling wax on my board and then pad out to the water. Hand over hand, I paddle myself out into the line up.
Not five minutes go by and a catch cute wave to warm me up. All thoughts of Dane escape and I am able to lose myself in the process. The wait, the search for the next set, the position adjustments so I'm in the perfect place to paddle to catch the wave. It's the quick get up and the looking down the line. It's the movement of my legs, torso, back, and arms to create the up and down on the wave. All of it is intoxicating, medicating, and totally grounding.
I even spark a few conversations with a few people who are unfamiliar to me. Two guys are from Spain, Jon and Ander. They came out all the way to California to have their own surf road trip. Santa Cruz was one place they planned to stop for a day or two.
I also see Chase and Sara, who I frequently see out at this spot. They are a nice couple that if I ever see them I make a point to talk to them because they are just good people. I always mean to get their phone numbers when we paddle back in together, but I'm always lost in their infectious ora that it slips my mind.
Hours have slipped by and I begin to feel hungry. I should paddle in, grab some lunch, go back to my room and actually begin my day. Alright next wave I catch I'm just going to ride it in.
Luckily, it doesn't take long and I'm walking back to the car within ten minutes. Man I got lucky because I have said that before and I was watching and waiting for another thirty minutes. The universe and the earth were good to me today. I caught several waves and they seemed to just keep coming.
After pulling off my wetsuit and quickly showering off the sea, salt, and sand, I'm feeling refreshed and ready to take on that To-Do list.
Back at my dorm, I'm pulling out my books, notebooks, and laptop from my backpack to begin tackling this week's homework. I settle in at my desk and begin to dive in to my community leadership textbook to analyze this week's reading.
I'm interrupted when my phone buzzes with a text. I check the time and it's already four. It's Dane. Man works fast, but he's let good amount of time pass. I decide to let some time pass before I text him back, don't want to see too eager.
After reaching the end of the chapter and completing the reading for a second class, I pick up my phone to read the message.
Dane: Hey! It's Dane. I was wondering the name of the place you were talking about for lunch? Sounded cool and wanted to look it up.
Smooth, I say to myself, rolling my eyes with a smirk. Boys... or should I say men. After making sure that I have let and adequate amount of time pass by since receiving the text, I type out the message.
Me: Hey Dane. It's called the Ingalls Street Commons. There's a bunch of breweries and cafes. You are bound to find something you like there. Everything really good.
I put the phone down and return to my studies. Still a little early for dinner, I can probably get through the reading for one more class before I grab some dinner. Not a few minutes later though, my phone buzzes again. I know it's Dane and smile to myself. He can wait, for now. I'll text him back during dinner.
The hour flies by and I'm able to get through the reading. I grab my phone and my keys and head out the door for dinner. After chatting with a few other residents, I find a table to myself. Once sitting with my dinner and taking a few bites, I pick up my phone and check my message and reply back.
Dane: Looks great! Excited for Tuesday. Would you like me to pick you up or would you like me to meet you there?
Me: I can meet you there. You don't need to come all the way up to campus.
Dane: I don't mind. But sounds good. :-)
Me: It's all good. Next time you can pick me up.
Before I even realize what I had typed out I already pressed send. Next time, I think to myself. How will I know there will be a next time?
My phone buzzes again, indicating another message.
Dane: Next time it is. ;)
I groan to myself and bury my head in my hands. What have I signed myself up for? I literally just met this guy, agreed to lunch, and now tripped into another date. I never get myself into these situations.
It will be fine, I reassure myself. He seemed fine during our walk today. In fact, he was more than fine! I allow myself to actually feel excited about meeting up with a guy for the first time, in what feels like ever.
I think back to our conversation. To what was said and what wasn't. Of course, I always think I talked too much and gave away too much information. He did dodge some of my questions. Not really dodge, but gave vague answers. I wonder what's his story?
Then it's like my mind is a record player and needle finally found its groove. He asked me if I could see him. What the hell does that mean? Why would he ask that? Nobody asks that... ever! My brows crease in concern, as the first hesitant thoughts about Tuesday's lunch date creeps into my mind.
I quickly relax my face into a smile as my roommate Holly slides her tray onto the table and takes up a seat across from me.