"AHHHHHHHHHH!"
Kakyoin jerks awake and almost chokes on his own breath. His eyes dart around anxiously, his whole body shakes, and his thoughts run a million miles an hour. Icy fear flows through his veins, but he's partially used to that feeling by now.
W-What?! A-Again?! Where am I?!
He's on a couch, in a house not his own. His breath hitches in his throat and he shuts his eyes tightly. He forces himself to take some deep breaths. After a few minutes of breathing, he opens his eyes again.
Right. My apartment's getting repaired, so Polnareff said that I could crash at his place for a few days. Don't be weak.
Sighing, Kakyoin grabs the blanket and pulls it back onto himself. His coral-red hair flops into his face, but he ignores it and lays down on his back. His vision blurs and starts to fade, but sleep doesn't come. It doesn't even taunt him, it's just not there. He can't fall back asleep. He sighs and focuses on his breathing. Memories of previous terrible nightmares dimly float across his mind, vying for his attention, but he attempts to ignore them and focus on his breathing, just as literally every Internet search he made said to do. He tries to relax his body and mind, but it isn't exactly working. He swears under his breath and tries again.
Fifteen minutes pass.
Then thirty minutes.
Then forty-five minutes.
Then an hour.
Kakyoin tries and tries and tries, but it doesn't work. After a little bit, he just gives up. He just lays on his side and waits, either for sleep or dawn. Eventually, sleep drags him into its comforting embrace, and its soothing cold flows through his body like a sugary-sweet cool drink on a hot day. A shame that this sweetness won't last...
"N-No...no no no...no...NO...! N-No! P-Please no...p-please...! N-No! NO!"
Polnareff's eyes snap open, and he listens more closely to the muffled mumble-screaming coming from...somewhere. He clenches his fists.
Is that Kakyoin?! What happened?!
Polnareff kicks off his blankets and throws open his door. He runs down the stairs, too focused on figuring out why his best friend is screaming at 3 am to stay quiet. Silver Chariot opens its door and glares at its user tiredly, strangely silent without its constantly clanking armor.
"...tag...tag tag...?" It asks.
Polnareff shakes his head 'no' and clenches his fists.
"No, it's okay. Go back to sleep."
The Stand nods and shuts its door, and Polnareff tip-toes over to the couch where Kakyoin is sleeping. His entire body is stiff as a board, and tears intermittently roll down his cheeks. He's still mumble-screaming.
"N-No...no, no, not again! No...please no...no...no...NO...!"
Polnareff taps his friend's shoulder.
"Kakyoin! Kakyoin, wake up!"
Kakyoin thrashes around in his sleep, as if he's trying to run away or fight back against something. Out of nowhere, he shoots up.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Polnareff grabs his shoulder and squeezes it in a futile attempt to be reassuring.
"Kakyoin!"
After about ten seconds, Polnareff slaps Kakyoin in the face. He stops screaming and looks at him, expression shifting from terrified to confused, as if he's never seen him before. His eyes look absolutely exhausted. His breaths are rushed and uneven, scratching his throat. He tries to form a coherent word, but he can't. All that comes out of his mouth is a choked sob. That expression of terror creeps back onto his face, bit by bit. He coughs a bit and lays back down. His breathing is still really messed up.
"Pol...na...reff...?" Kakyoin forces out. Polnareff nods. He looks like he's trying not to cry.
"I'm right here, okay?"
Kakyoin coughs again and nods in understanding.
"What happened? I heard you screaming."
Kakyoin starts to choke up. Polnareff squeezes his shoulder again. He can feel the rigid, metal-like tension in his body, the sweat soaking through his sleeve. He curses under his breath.
Whatever it was, it really shook him up. Damn it.
"Take a breath, okay?" Polnareff whispers, his eyes filling with tears. Kakyoin attempts to regulate his breathing, and after a little bit, he manages to get it under control.
"It was just a nightmare..." Kakyoin mutters, while pushing Polnareff's hand off his shoulder, "I'm alright."
This has been happening for a while anyway. I can deal with it. I tried to find what caused it the first couple times, but I couldn't find anything. Maybe I just need some stress relief.
He pushes his hair out of his face and rubs his temples tiredly. Polnareff sits down on the couch.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Kakyoin shakes his head 'no'.
"No, I'm alright."
Kakyoin tries to hide it, but Polnareff can hear the slight hesitation in his voice, can see the slight tremors in his hands. He sighs.
"Try to go back to sleep, okay? If you need anything, I'm right upstairs."
"Okay, Polnareff."
With that, Polnareff walks away, back to his room, and Kakyoin lays down once again. He's still shaking...
"Ugh, shut the fuck up."
Polnareff crosses his arms and glares at the ground, uncharacteristically angry. Joseph isn't fazed. Jotaro pulls his hat down in annoyance.
"So I've been meaning to ask, how's that artistic redheaded blade-of-grass sweetheart of yours?" Joseph says with a smirk. Jotaro facepalms and growls softly. Polnareff drops his arms, his jaw clenched in disproportionate frustration. Joseph's smirk drops. Polnareff's most likely reaction to such a question would have been insulted and embarrassed, maybe just embarrassed, and joking or cockily commenting back. Instead, he just seems...weirdly angry, like he's trying to use anger to mask some other feeling or something. No pride. No cocky remarks or mood-lightening jokes. Not even his normal anger. Polnareff turns away from the other two.
"One. Don't call him that. Two. We're not like that. Three. He's fine, thanks for asking," he hisses. Joseph puts his hands on his hips.
"What's up with you today?"
"I'm fine," he mumbles.
Jotaro shakes his head at the ground. Joseph crosses his arms and rolls his eyes.
"No, you're clearly not. What's going on?"
Polnareff jerks his head up, his expression twisted with some sort of rage...or pain.
"I SAID I'M FINE!" He snaps. Joseph flinches at his raised voice. Polnareff scoffs and turns on his heel. He walks away stiffly. Jotaro looks at his grandfather, his sharp blue eyes betraying frustration and concern that he refuses to show on his stone-cold face.
"You damn idiot," he mutters, and then walks after his friend.
"Polnareff, what's going on?"
Polnareff clutches his arms to his chest and looks down at the ground. Jotaro can't tell if he's ignoring his question, or if he just didn't hear him.
"Polnareff?"
Polnareff turns to him, then turns back. Jotaro could swear that he saw tears in his eyes.
"Go away," Polnareff mutters. Jotaro can feel something trying to crack through his mask of calm. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.
Calm.
Jotaro doesn't move. Polnareff sighs. He turns and walks away, but Jotaro grabs his shoulder. Polnareff flinches and knocks his hand away.
"D-Don't touch me!"
He's really not acting like himself, but there doesn't seem to be any signs of a Stand power. What happened? I mean, he's normally pretty emotional, but this is just...strange. No prideful comments, no jokes, nothing. It's like he's empty. Empty of everything but anger...and pain.
"Polnareff, what happened? You're not acting like yourself."
Polnareff opens his mouth to say something, but instead, he just shakes his head at the ground and turns away. Jotaro sidesteps and stands in front of him.
"Polnareff."
Jotaro pulls his hat down and lowers his voice.
"He's not 'fine', is he."
Polnareff snaps his head up.
"I...I don't know who you're talking about."
"Kakyoin," Jotaro responds simply. Polnareff looks down and laughs sadly.
"You're good at this. No, he's not. Come on."
Polnareff gestures for Jotaro to follow him, and then starts walking in the direction of his house. Jotaro follows, his hands in his pockets, his expression slightly grim.
"Kakyoin?" Polnareff calls as soon as he and Jotaro walk in the door. They hear something clatter on the floor.
"GAH?! Oh, h-hello Polnareff! I'm on the couch!"
Polnareff looks at Jotaro apologetically. Jotaro just shakes his head at the ground and follows him to the couch. Kakyoin's sitting there, reaching over for the book he dropped, a bowl of untouched cherries at his side. As soon as he notices Jotaro, he flinches and drops the book again.
"J-Jotaro?! W-Why are you here?" Kakyoin splutters. Jotaro pulls his hat down and looks at the ground. Hierophant Green is sleeping under the couch, its long tube-like tail wrapped around itself protectively.
"What's it doing?" Jotaro asks. Kakyoin sighs.
"It didn't get a lot of sleep last night."
"I meant it being under the couch."
Kakyoin fidgets with his hair, braiding and unbraiding the longer piece on his left side, almost unconsciously.
"It hates wide-open spaces. It feels vulnerable in places like that."
"Hm."
Jotaro looks around a bit, then notices Kakyoin's bowl of cherries. They're shiny and untouched, but they've clearly been there for a bit. He crosses his arms, still refusing to express his concern.
"Aren't cherries your favorite?"
Kakyoin looks down at his book, his eyes lightly skimming the words. He looks...sad.
"I'm not hungry," he mutters. Polnareff clenches his fist.
"Kakyoin, you have to eat something. It's 3 pm, you've been up since 7 am or so, and you haven't eaten anything today. It's not safe. There's no way that feels okay."
"...I'm fine, Polnareff."
"No, you're not!"
Jotaro turns to Polnareff, slightly surprised by his raised voice. Tears sparkle in Polnareff's eyes like millions of tiny diamonds, reflecting light every which way. One flows down his face. Then another. Then another. Pretty soon, they all start rushing down like a waterfall through a broken dam. Polnareff doesn't scream. He doesn't say anything. He just stands there, crying silently.
"K-Kakyoin...please eat something. I...I need to go," Polnareff mutters through his tears. He turns and runs. His footsteps echo up the stairs, and then a door shuts. If he listens closely, Jotaro can hear sobbing. He turns to Kakyoin.
"Look, idiot. You're not fooling anyone. What happened to you, and what happened to him?"
"He's just being emotional, like always," Kakyoin says with a tone of fake ice. Jotaro glares at him. Kakyoin picks up one of his cherries, but hesitates. He sighs, shakes his head, and puts it back. Jotaro pulls down his hat.
Gotcha.
"Kakyoin."
Kakyoin looks up.
"Yes, Jotaro?"
"You never waste perfectly good cherries. What. Happened."
Kakyoin sighs and clenches his fist.
"Tsk...I'll be totally honest here, Jotaro. I was weak. And I hate it."
Jotaro raises his eyebrows puzzledly.
"Weak?"
"I was scared out of my mind, Jotaro. I'm only telling you this because I can't deal with it alone. But that's weak. I hate bowing down to anyone or anything. But I did anyway."
Jotaro pulls down his hat.
"Scared? What happened? What scared you? Not much can actually scare you."
Kakyoin shakes his head.
"Nevermind. Just go away. I need to be alone right now."
Jotaro crosses his arms and stays right where he is.
"Jotaro, I told you to leave. Leave. I don't want to have to hurt you."
Jotaro still doesn't move. Kakyoin grits his teeth. He's angry, but also scared...and sad. The anger overpowers it though. He doesn't need Jotaro's pity.
"Jotaro. Leave. Now. I don't want or need your damn pity."
Jotaro looks at him, confused.
"Pity?"
Tears well up in Kakyoin's angry eyes, shining like his favorite emerald. He wipes them stubbornly.
"Tsk. That's the only reason you're here, right? 'Cause I'm too damn pathetic?"
"Kakyoin, what the hell are you talking about?"
"That stupid-ass thing was right, and I hate it. I'm so sick of this bullshit..." Kakyoin growls under his breath. Jotaro looks at him, the concern starting to show on his face. Kakyoin looks up and clears his throat.
"I'm fine. Now go away."
Jotaro looks him up and down, and realizes that there's no winning here. He has another friend who he can help. He might seem like an asshole with a heart of frozen stone, but he's actually a really caring person who hates seeing his friends in pain. So he turns on his heel and walks away. Kakyoin curses himself with every word and phrase he can think of.
You weak, pathetic bastard. Can't even deal with a little bit of fear and sadness.
Kakyoin grabs his book. He spares one more look at Jotaro before he opens it and pretends to read. Tears stain the annotated margins, their dark forms betraying his 'weakness'. He hears clunking, and when he turns his head to the side, Hierophant Green is sitting in the couch right next to him. It looks at him. It never truly has an expression, but Kakyoin can always read its 'expression'.
What's wrong?
Kakyoin scoffs softly. He gets up and walks out Polnareff's back door. He slides to the ground on the deck, his hair in his face, his knees tucked into his chest. The air is so tense that it could be cut with a knife. He tries to keep his composure, but he can't. He starts crying again, staring at the horizon. Tears roll down his face. The longer piece of his hair blows in the gentle wind. He hears Hierophant Green come out and lean on the wall beside him.
"Splash?"
Kakyoin keeps staring at the horizon. Hierophant Green slaps his head.
"Splash? Splash splash splash."
Kakyoin shakes his head.
"No, Hierophant Green. I don't feel like myself right now," he mutters. His Stand slides to the ground next to him. Kakyoin doesn't even react.
"Splash...splash splash splash...splash..." it mutters, crying lime-green tears. Kakyoin shakes his head again.
"No, it's not your fault," he promises, trying to pin a calm tone on his shaky, emotional voice. But anyone could recognize that he failed pretty miserably.
The Stand shakes for a little bit, and then it turns its body to Kakyoin. It's still crying. It grabs its user in a tight hug, like it thinks that he'll disappear. Kakyoin is a bit surprised, but hugs back. After a little bit, he pulls away. He gently wipes the tears from his face with the back of his hand, then does the same for his Stand. His usually iron-hard expression softens.
"T-Thank you..." he mutters, "I'm feeling better."
He gets up. Hierophant Green follows him inside.
"Splash splash?"
"Not perfect, no. I need a bit of time, okay?"
"Splash...splash splash splash, splash?"
Kakyoin smiles.
"Yes. Thank you."