* I remember when I was little I was given the nickname of the little monkey because I liked to sneak around. My dad traveled a lot so I couldn't make any real friends. Then the year of my 6 years we ended up settling in Ascheritz the new continent. The people there were nice and their minds were not limited by absurd barriers like religion or skin color. I probably spent the best years of my life there. Having said that nothing is eternal, my mother died the same year and I cried as hard as I could. 4 years later a man came to see us at the ranch. Obviously he was not from the area given his quickdraw, his overpriced suit was proof of that. That day my father was brushing the horses in the stable and I came back from hunting with a hare in hand *.
-Are you Lord Decken? From the Decken house?
* Lord? Who that Lord? I don't remember my father being from some rich family. He is an antique dealer *.
-What do you want from him in Decken? * My father replied *.
* The man whispered things in his ear then my father's face tightened. What was so bad that he started to sweat so much? After that he walked towards me looking a little serious before smiling a little *.
- Looks like our little trip is coming to an end.
- What's wrong daddy? * I asked scared *.
-Nothing, we're just going to return to my native land.
* This is how I arrived in the Duchy. I was only twelve at the time. My father often told me about my mother, how he met her and what he liked about her. So today when I think back to what he did to me * ....
-Raaaaah.
* I punched the bag of sand which came loose and fell to the ground *.
-It was worn out anyway.
* I felt the door open behind me and I turned around in a hurry. I saw a small figure jumped on the other side *.
- Big brother, can I come in?
* I let out a sigh when I saw who it was *.
- Go in there.
* A little red haired guy like mine walked into the room. Robert Decken Junior. He has the same first names as my father and apparently he's my brother from another mother. It was rare that he came to visit me in my training room. I lifted the bag and hung it up again and resumed my training *.
-S... Said, I can ask you a question?
-Keep talking. * I replied jaded *.
-How was it .... The war?
*is he serious ? Whatever a twelve year old kid interested in war is troubling. Having said that, I can see it in his eyes that it has nothing to do with us. He is pure childish curiosity *.
-It was no different from what I imagined.
-Not different?
-It stank of death, the food was disgusting, you had to dig kilometers of trenches to take cover and when it ducked it ran in all directions to hide in a hole.
-It must have been terrible.
-Oh it is. But do you want to know the worst part of all this?
* He nodded his head in a sign of incomprehension. I stared at him with an amused smile *.
- The worst part is that I loved it.
-You have .... Adored? * He wondered *.
- Crawling in the mud, getting shot, getting shot and retaliating, yes I loved it.
* I left him alone to his misunderstanding as I kicked the punching bag again. He must have thought that I'm crazy, but it's a feeling you only understand after you've experienced it *.
-Said ... Big brother?
-Call me Troy, we've been living together for 6 years.
-Y ... Yes. I wanted to know ... You've killed someone before.
* I gave him a puzzled look, but it had obviously intimidated him *.
-You ... You don't have to answer ....
-Yes ... * I replied *. And even a package.
-A ... And you don't mind. I mean they are other humans.
-Not at all. Why should I feel guilty for killing an enemy soldier?
-But....
-On the battlefield, the notion of good or bad is crap. What really matters is you and your brothers. How to get out of this hell with your whole comrades.
* I looked at him and I felt he was terrified by my words. But never mind, he won't be 12 years old all his life *.
-Do you think I'm a murderer?
-N ... no. I think I understand what prompted you to do it. One last question. Did you love to kill?
-The class is over, break now. * I was screaming *
-Sir Yes Sir.
* After that I took a restorative shower before changing. I dressed the simplest in the world. Dark blue shirt and black pants. I decided to go visit the others. It's been 5 days since we last saw each other and I don't know what they're doing. When I left I saw a man in the living room talking to my father *.
-It seems that your son entered the army as a simple soldier. This is very unfortunate.
-What the hell with you McGohen, Trojan is an adult now he does what he wants.
* I went down the steps and he noticed my presence. That said, I had my hands in my pockets and I wasn't paying attention to him *
-Oh, we were just talking about you. What you grew up. * He said holding my shoulders *.
* Normal I am over one meter 80 *.
-A member of a noble family should not stoop to fight in the mud. I myself have a high-ranking son who could help you ....
-I appreciate the help my uncle. * I say, moving his hand away from my shoulder *. But I don't need it. I would climb the ladder myself.
-But ... But .... I don't understand you, why you insist on wanting to stay at the bottom of the well. You won't have to risk your life anymore ....
-If it's my life that scares you, don't worry, I still have many years ahead of me. Promotions should be based on merit and not on the family name.
-Exact. * Replied my father *.
* I felt my uncle confused by my words but I did not care *.
-The motto of our family is do what you want as long as your heart dictates to you in the measure of your morality. And until my heart tells me otherwise I feel good among the mutt.
* After these scathing words I headed for the door *.
-Robert .... You have to reason with him.
- You should know that. You can't reason a Decken. * He laughed *.
* After leaving the mansion I toured the places where I used to hang out with others but nothing they were nowhere. Having said that, I heard funny rumors in the streets. Passers-by were not stopping soldiers who would have been captured in the North for nearly a month and then released. The North ? What kind of army could attack us in the north. The Tarkovicthe would have found a way to get over the clouds or what? *
-Hey ... Hey I'm talking to you.
* I turned around and saw a girl who kept hitting my ears *.
-Samantha?
-Ah finally you are listening to me ....
-What are you doing here ?
-Euuuh I live here of course.
*I looked up and saw a small building a few stories high just above my head*.
-I was helping a friend move so that she was not too far from college.
-You would have to hire movers. Radine goes ....
-I'm doing with the means at hand ok? * She pouted *. By the way, don't you hear from Arianne? I know she helps her dad but it's going to be more of a me than we haven't seen. New Years Eve is fast approaching and we would very much like her to be there.
* Arianne .... Has disappeared? What the hell's been going on since we fucking came home. I shouldn't have isolated myself like that. 5 days goes by too quickly. I was about to leave when Sam held my hand *.
-You're still the same eh. Always in a hurry to run in all directions.
- I have to find Zell and the others.
-And me in all this you thought of me? You just came back from the front, we could take advantage of it, no.
- I don't have time here ....
-You never have time. Troy Der Decken.
*She's right. My social life is a disaster these days. I am no longer a shadow of myself, that said my current life does not displease me but I admit having to make an effort *.
-I get it. * I say hugging her *. As soon as I finish settling my affairs we meet again. I invite you to dinner tonight what do you say?
-C .... Close. Too close.
-Ah sorry ... * I say moving away *.
-I... It's okay let's say tonight 9 pm. Either ... or not late.
* She was red as a tomato and was cute. After that I went to Zell's to find him but he wasn't there, Mell couldn't tell me where he was. Same at Swan, no need to go to Friedich since his house was bordering on haunted there was no one except the housekeeper *.
-But it's not true. * I pouted in my corner *.
* Despite everything, however, there was still a place that I had not searched. A place so obvious that I quickly crossed it off the list as soon as I started my research. Army HQ, I remember when I first came here I asked my dad what it was. He replied that this is the place where the corpses are made. I admit today that makes me laugh. When he told me I was going to have a new mom, I immediately objected. Why take another wife if he loved mom as much as he said *.
-I don't need a new mom ....
* I was far from suspecting that he had also had a child with her. An adulterous child? I remember when we first met he was shy to hide behind his mother as I glared at him. Once we found ourselves alone in our room I took the opportunity to ask him *.
-How .... What's your name?
-Robert ... * He said *. Robert Decken Junior. Robb Der Decken for the presentation.
* How is it possible, with such a name this kid .... After hearing his full name I threw myself on him and kicked him. I had never felt so much hate boiling inside me. If the servants hadn't stopped me who knows how far I would have gone *.
-But .... How dare you do that to your own brother? * Shouted my angry father *.
-He's not my brother. * I screamed *. He never will be.
-TROY .... You are locked up in your room until ...
* I left without even finishing his sentence. I was my father's adulterous child. I know it doesn't make sense since I'm the oldest, but in the eyes of society it was. My life had no fucking meaning * anymore.
-One piece ... Help me please.
* As I came out of my personal introspection I then noticed this handicapped guy sitting next to me. From his jacket I knew immediately that he was a veteran. Without even thinking I gave him half of my wallet. I think he had never seen so much money at one time *.
-Thank you son.
- Where did you serve?
- Marine rifle. Mackenzie 4th Fleet.
* I let out a stunned hiss. This guy dates from the time of the collisions. And we just got out of it barely 20 years ago. How long has he been on the wall *?
-The Ducales Marines are tough guys. I have friends who have joined them.
-And you son you served or that?
-I'm still on duty sir. Elysian Army 15th infantry regiment.
* I got up and greeted him before I left. The army headquarters was a few steps away. Once there I went to the reception. The girl with the round glasses was more like my type *.
-Is it for a visit?
- Staff Sergeant Decken 15th Infantry Regiement.
- You are on leave, sergeant. So you are only entitled to access as a simple civilian.
-Building regulations eh. I guess I'll come back.
-Yes that's it....
-But when is your next day off?
-To do what ?
-I was planning to invite you to eat but if you want we can just go for a walk.
* She looked up at me and frowned. On the other hand, I had a small smirk *.
-Are you dragging me here?
-I'm mostly trying to get you out of your daily boredom.
* She stared at me for a moment to say nothing then lowered her head again, staring at her papers *.
-No thanks.
-Tch you're not nice. I'll be back.
* In the evening, I accompanied Samantha to Shina's. Already because I wanted to eat cheaper but also because I was hoping to meet others. This evening should have been ordinary frankly and yet * ....
-What ... What happened? * Said Samantha *.
* Shina Restaurant went up in smoke .... Literally. I found the young manager in the rubble digging up stuff *.
-Shina .... Shina .... What ....
* She turned to me with a contemptuous gaze. I immediately understood what happened *.
-Shit. * I Screamed throwing my fist *. How can one still be so mentally retarded. Daaaaamn.
-I know you had nothing to do with it, Troy. * She said on the verge of tears *. But ... My dad is in the hospital and these motherfuckers ... These motherfuckers have ...
-I am sorry. * Said Samantha *. I will help you.
-I don't want your pity. * She yelled *.
-It's not pity but common sense. * She replied *.
-A fire here and no newspaper reported on it .... No firefighter came to put it out too. * I say to myself out loud *.
-A guy came in saying it was the fault of those like me. His brother was not among the prisoners from the north. When are they going to figure out? * Will she cry *.
-A name. *I said*. Just give me a name.
-Troy what are you going to do? * Sam asked *.
* Robert asked me if I had my job. For sure I love him but what I love even more is being able to beat this kind of asshole. Our country must change, our mentalities must change *.
-Thank you ... I'll take care of the rest.
*To be continued*
* I learned later that Zell and co had gone to the North station. But it is another story*.