Daniel woke up to a tech banging on the door, telling him and Rick to get up for breakfast. They used what little time they had to make themselves decent looking and ready for the day. They were paraded down to the cafeteria to eat, patients talking sleepily amongst themselves. Daniel felt a bit off, but dismissed it as nothing. He was on new medication after all, the sudden change was likely putting him out a bit.
Daniel trudged through the morning, that feeling that something wasn't right never leaving him. After his daily meet with Dr. Joseph (he did mention his off feeling) he was allowed some free time, which he spent shut up in his room.
"Hey, stupid," a voice hissed. Daniel looked around, unable to find its source. For the briefest moment it clicked in his mind that his new medication wasn't working before he seemed to lose touch with all of reality.
"A hospital? Really?" another groaned. "So fucked up you need a hospital?"
"Shut up," Daniel replied to thin air.
"You know, when nobody's looking, you could probably take these bedsheets and hang yourself," the first said, both voices chuckling.
"Shut up," Daniel repeated with more force.
"It's been done before here, surprise surprise. Who says you can't do it too?" the first asked.
"You're fucking worthless," the second said forcefully. "Why don't you?"
"Shut up!" Daniel said once again, this time yelling and grabbing fistfuls of his hair. They were getting worse and worse, and Daniel had no way to stop it.
He headed towards the door to find Dr. Joseph, but one of the voices commanded him to stay back, and he couldn't help but to obey.
"What are you living for? Him?" One said forcefully.
Daniel knew "him" meant Jack. Jack had always wanted him to stay alive no matter what, and he'd become the reason the voices hadn't gotten him killed yet without even knowing it. Really, he was the only reason. It wasn't that Daniel had a bad life when his medication was working correctly. It was just that the voices were so awful he had to listen to them. If they told him to kill himself, he had to do just that.
"He'll move on," the other said. "Everyone will. Just kill yourself already."
"Fucking worthless," the first spat.
The taunts and insults wouldn't stop. They kept on and kept on, driving Daniel over the edge.
"Pathetic little crazy fag," one laughed at him.
"Stop!" he screamed.
Just then, Rick walked in, looking extremely concerned at the scene before him. Daniel was crouched on the ground, yelling at voices that weren't there and grabbing his hair.
"Daniel, are you okay?" he asked, knowing the answer was an obvious no.
Daniel kept on yelling at the voices, not even aware of Rick's presence. Rick backed off slowly, still extremely concerned. He left, returning a moment later with Dr. Joseph.
"Make it stop, make it stop," Daniel sobbed. This was by far the worst of his episodes.
Dr. Joseph was quick to try to calm Daniel down, which eventually worked. Daniel told him quietly, "They're still there."
Dr. Joseph led him to his office as he dug through his notes, trying to find Daniel's old prescription. He left to retrieve it, returning a moment later with a pill.
"Here you go. It's not the best for you, but it'll have to do for now. I take it the new pills don't work at all?"
Daniel nodded. Dr. Joseph sat down and looked him over for a moment. "I can try to find you something else. Would you like to tell me about your episode?"
"It was my worst episode," Daniel commented. "They're never that bad. It was voices, like usual. Telling me I was worthless, telling me different ways I could get away with killing myself in here. Like tying bedsheets together and hanging myself from the light in the group therapy room. They kept telling me I should kill myself, over and over, and that I wouldn't be missed. They were louder than normal too."
Dr. Joseph noted everything Daniel was saying, a look of extreme concern on his face.
Daniel talked about his episode a bit more, comparing it to other times, and rating exactly how bad it was on a scale of one to twenty. He gave it an eighteen.
Daniel was sent back outside and a tech was ordered to keep watch of him for the rest of the day to make sure he was okay.
Daniel was fine now, but he still couldn't forget about what the voices told him. Would Jack get over him? Would his parents? What about his new friends, would they care? He didn't know the answer, and it was killing him.
He also wondered if he could possibly get away with using the bedsheets to hang himself. That was simply more of a curiosity thing though, rather than a thinking about doing it kind of thing.
Daniel wasn't in the best mood for the rest of the day for understandable reasons. Rick was sympathetic of Daniel, and tried to be extra careful and nice to him. Daniel appreciated it, but didn't really need it. He was fine.
The rest of the time in between lunch and his episode was dull, and he was extremely quiet during the group therapies. He kept looking at the hanging light though, wondering why it was made like that. If nobody was looking, it would be easy for someone to hang themselves. He figured he should mention that to someone.
As Daniel was shuffling down to lunch with all the other patients, the tech (who looked extremely bored) was still following right next to him. A few other people needed to have techs beside them as well, he noted.
He sat down at the table he usually sat at, which his three friends already occupied. The tech sat next to him, eyeing him like a hawk.
This new "guest" made everyone uncomfortable in all honesty, and so the first half of lunch was just silent and awkward. Nobody said anything, and everyone just ate their food, except Daniel. He just sort of picked at it.
"You need to eat," the tech said, causing everyone to jump a little at the sudden break of silence. "You'll lose points."
Daniel paid no mind to her, and continued to hardly eat. She was about to pester him again when CJ spoke up.
"So how've you been?" he asked, finally just pretending like the woman wasn't even there.
"You can see," Daniel joked weakly, nodding towards her.
The guys all laughed a bit at that, except for Rick, who had a look of concern on his face. It wasn't necessarily difficult to have a tech assigned to you here, but it still was never good when one was.
"You'll have to tell me about that later," CJ said before moving on. "I hear a ton of us are getting out at once soon. It's weird, but good if it's true."
Daniel noted a lot of their conversations were about leaving. CJ really didn't like it here, and Daniel felt bad for him. He truly hoped he would leave soon. If he were to be admit his more selfish thoughts, he only wanted CJ to leave when he did because honestly, he really liked having him as a friend. He didn't want to be left alone in here. But really, he was trying to leave those selfish thoughts and think about CJ's happiness, which was outside these walls.
"Yeah, I should be one of them," Phoenix beamed. He didn't like it here either, but he didn't hate it as much as CJ. Daniel didn't reckon anyone did.
"I don't know if I am or not, but it would be nice," Rick added.
"I've been here forever, I should be," CJ rolled his eyes. The tech raised her eyebrows in doubt, but kept silent.
"You know Alexis? She has to be leaving soon. She's completely fine and has been here a month," Phoenix said, always the one to bring up others. Daniel gathered that he was a bit of a gossip.
After a few more therapies and such, Daniel was led down to his final therapy, recreational therapy. It was essentially just watching movies with popcorn, which was pretty nice. Today they were watching The Nightmare Before Christmas, CJ's favorite movie.
CJ and Daniel sat next to each other, Rick and Phoenix a couple of feet in front of them. CJ was smiling widely, and Daniel couldn't not stare. He noticed the way his eyes lit up crinkled in the corners as he stared at the screen, truly content in that.
At some point near the end when Jack and Sally were getting together, CJ subconsciously leaned on Daniel, smiling a little more. Daniel felt butterflies in his stomach and was suddenly far more consumed by the warm fuzzy feeling than the movie. His breathing faltered, and he was trying harder than he should have to not smile himself. He carefully placed an arm around CJ, cautious to not overstep any boundaries or make it weird. He allowed himself to smile, savoring the happy feeling. The lights were flicked back on as the movie ended, and the tech that was with Daniel scolded the two for physical contact, which was a big no no around here. Another couple up front got the same speech, which CJ laughed at. Daniel laughed too, but more because of CJ than the funny situation.
Daniel had to suppress his oddly affectionate feelings, as it was visiting hour. Mostly parents came to see their kids here, but a few people just had friends see them. It wasn't like everyone in here was a teenager anyways.
Today Jack came to see Daniel, sliding into the little chair across from the table Daniel was seated at.
"Hey, Dani!" he beamed, overjoyed to see his friend. "Who's this?"
"I had a really bad- my worst, actually- episode today. I'm fine now, but my psychiatrist told me I'll need her to accompany me for all of today," Daniel answered nonchalantly.
"Worst?" Jack questioned, not interested in the nurse anymore.
Daniel repeated what he told Dr. Joseph, but this time the woman heard him and he thought he noticed her expression turn into one of sympathy, which he paid no mind to.
"Oh, Daniel, that's awful," Jack sighed. "I'm sorry, man. I wish you were out with me."
"I know, me too. But this is supposed to help me get better..."
Jack sighed. "I guess so. Hey, made any new pals?" he teased.
"Actually, yes. Rick- my roommate-, Phoenix, and CJ. They're all really nice, you'd like them. We need to all hang out when we're out."
"Oh, really? I didn't think... you're not the most social person, I'm a little shocked," Jack laughed.
"Yeah, I know. It's easier to make friends here though. We just sort of understand each other, if that makes any sense."
"Yeah, it does a little bit. As surprised as I am, I have to say, I'm really happy you've opened up a little. I hate to see you tied down to one friend," he joked.
Daniel had this sinking feeling that Jack got annoyed by him because he didn't have anyone else, but tried to ignore it and not let it show.
"Yeah," he agreed simply.
The two talked a while longer before Daniel, along with the other patients, were rushed back into the main part of the hospital.
Daniel slept peacefully, putting the worried little thought about Jack out of his mind and drifting off.