"Boy, the good old icy water bucket always works."
Res groaned as he stood up and his wet clothes clung to him like tar. "Did you have to do that?"
"Wake you up, you mean? Yes, because today are the finals of the Alchemy Tournament."
Another groan escaped his lips. "I knew there was something I forgot. Wait … I can't … The prince will kill me on the spot."
"Yes, but they will only kill you before and after the tournament and I already have a plan on how to smuggle you in."
"I have decided otherwise, I won't go to the finals, I'd rather relax a little in your lab."
He received a deft whack on the back of his head.
"Stupid boy, delegates from the entire world will be there. Most important of all, the ambassador of the high southerner academies. You want to be great, right?"
"Ahhhhhh, no?"His objection resulted in another whack on the head.
"It is alright to be humble, but you are taking it to another level. Shut up and listen. You will need to impress the ambassadors of the high academies. Her protection will save your life in the long run."
Grumbling, Res agreed and clambered out of bed. When Res heard how Granny wanted to smuggle him in for the first time, he laughed. When she didn't laugh along, cold sweat ran down his back. He redoubled his efforts, but Granny shut down all his objections. The next two hours were filled with fitting the torturous mask and new clothes once again.
By early noon, Res was standing in the same spot, near the participant's entrance. Behind him, the carriage that had brought them here left with a loud cracking of a whip. The only difference this time was the fact that he was alone and his appearance had changed. He wore a traditional wide red dress that showed a decent amount of fake jelly cleavage. There was so much makeup on his mask that it had added four millimeters of thickness to it. His shoes were now delicate slippers and on his necks and ears dangled expensive jewelry. When Jason had seen Res in the mirror, he had laughed for half an hour, and even now, he was cracking one joke after another.
"Bro, cum on, don't be insulted by some harmless gay jokes." Once again, Jason howled in laughter and Res did his best to remain stone-faced.
"You can save your laughter for later. The worst part is about to come."
Jason's laughter redoubled and Res's façade cracked for a moment to reveal his angry snarl underneath. Granny had told him that elite palace guards were checking every competitor. They could sense anyone's cultivation level, so he couldn't just walk in with a new disguise. Only nobles and rich individuals were allowed to watch the finals of the tournament. Granny wanted him to get into another academy, but Res had had enough of school.
Finally, his distraction arrived. Once again announced by two foreriders, the long carriage of the prince came into view. He tried to put on his most convincing and alluring grin and began to wave at the carriage. The horses came to a stop in front of the competitor's entrance. Res cried out while hoping that his feminine voice wouldn't crack.
"My Prince, my prince! Let me join you! I love you!"
All the while he kept his smiling mask in place. As soon as Res began to scream, the prince gave him one smile and then paid him no more heed. Several other court ladies giving him dirty looks emerged out of the carriage. but Res continued his act and followed the prince's entourage. The prince ignored the protesting clerk responsible for registration and entered the arena. Res had wedged himself between two of the prince's sycophants and tried to project an air of infatuation.
The elite royal guards at the entrance looked displeased, but let the group with Res in it pass. As soon as he entered the building, he disentangled from the group and slunk away around a corner. Granny had pounded the layout into his mind and he strode along the premade route. With a sigh of relief, he rounded a corner and entered into an abandoned storage room.
He tore off the dress from his body, only to reveal another layer of clothing underneath. He exited the room in the colosseum's servant dress code and changed his stride to a purposeful one. When a female servant nodded at him, he had to hold back from punching her unconscious out of fear of being found out. Somehow, Granny had managed to find a secret servant's passage into the colosseum.
Res only needed to walk for one more … "Hey, you!"
Res whirled around in shock, but it was too late to save himself. An angry old woman had already grabbed his arm and was dragging him in the opposite direction. "I forgot your name again, but you are the last-minute replacement for Selina, aren't you? You know how to play the drums, right?"
"Bro, shit. You have to agree, else she is going raise some sort of alarm. Please tell me you know how to play drums."
Res began to sweat under the mask, as he definitely couldn't play any instrument. His parents had wanted him to learn the cello, but in his first lesson, the teacher had broken out into tears. Not because of his talent, but because she had never seen anyone so incompetent at music. He cleared his throat and answered in his best female voice.
"Yes."
"Fine, Fine. We are about there."
With that, Res was thrust into a room made out of rows of orderly and ready to march musicians. The old servant pushed him past hundreds of musicians to the front of the entire parade. She attached a drum on a string to his shoulders and thrust a giant drumstick into his hand.
"You already know the drill. The song is 'the march of the glorious'. Start allegro, continue into adagio and when the cadenza begins, add some diminution. Finally, you will execute a decrescendo that ends in a diminuendo."
Res's head swam from all the southerner terminology. The only southerner words he understood were 'Pizza' and 'Pasta', two delicious foodstuffs. Before he could think of an alternative, the stone wall in front of him opened up, to reveal the colosseum beyond. A shove from behind sent him into motion and he marched out into the field. Behind him, the musicians were hissing at him, so he began to bang on the drum in constant intervals. That wasn't the rhythm they expected, so all the musicians broke out into unorganized chaos. The trumpets blasted out random notes while the trombones were trying to stick to some cohesion.
All in all, it was a mess. It degenerated into tooting and vain attempts of individuals to pick up some sort of rhythm. All the while, Res continued banging on his drums like a madman, he even had to admit that he was enjoying himself. After the first serious attempt had failed, he banged on the drum-like it was a piece of meat he had to tenderize. Nobles from surrounding booths laughed and pointed fingers at him.
When he reached the middle of the stadium, he tore off his clothes, wiped his makeup away, and bowed. He could see recognition dawn in several nobles' eyes. When he scanned the booths, he spotted Granny grinning at him from a stand and giving him a thumbs up. He returned the gesture and searched for Xenia and Serafina, but couldn't find them. Res shouted out as loud as he could.
"The fact that the musicians managed to put out music at all with me in the lead deserves applause."
There was general laughter and light applause. He hoped that would be enough to save the old woman from more severe punishment. What made Res a little queasy were the countless elite royal guard that on top of the arena. With nothing to do, he spread out a small tower he had used to wipe his face, closed his eyes, and relaxed.