What was the feeling when she was between hurting the one she cared for all her life, and extracting vengeance upon the deaths of her loved ones?
She would bet that no one would dare to find out. No one would swim into the sea of fires and get frozen in ice, and jumped off a cliff with no rope, and drown in the water—over and over again. That was how she felt right now. That was how painful it was as if her life, too, was slowly dying.
No one would understand how she was feeling as of this moment. No one would want to know her thoughts, her dreams, her wishes, and her agonies. She had everything that any creature would envy of. But whatever she had, whatever she would do, nothing's still the same. A queen with a broken soul, alone, and almost forgotten, she held her composure and never let it down. That was all she had. Pride. Pity for herself. Lost. And the heavy crown upon her head, flickering with those empty gems, she never liked to whimper but she did.
In this non solace place of hers, she sat down on her throne carved with Atlantean symbols and various gems. This was just a ridiculous chair for her, a long time ago. Supremacy had nothing to do with her. She resolutely believed that Ayden was the rightful successor. Nevertheless, when he decided to choose another course, his twin brother, Kinos who loved to rule over Atlantis, and who was supposed to be the next crowned King, took over.
Not her.
Everything changed when Kinos held Ayden and Fate captive and decided to execute them after he proclaimed that Ayden was the one who murdered their father. They searched him for years and she hid the truth that she still had connections with Ayden.
That one unforgettable day, she heaved a sigh whenever she remembered those instances. Kinos turned to stone; Ayden ran away with Fate and chose that woman over her; their mother died due to depression; and she began to wear these invisible chains all over her body. Yes, she hated Ayden's selfishness but she still loved him. And for that, she hated him even more.
For she was utterly alone in this world.
"Well done, your Highness."
She inclined her head at the sound of a heavily Atlantean voice to find Adolfo, the Commanding General, who was slowly approaching the throne. Adolfo was Kinos' only trusted friend and the only one who helped her with these politics, peace and order, and every single problem that she had as a queen.
Without his help, she would be worthless.
"If you're talking about my brother, I don't think I am." She said simply, which made him literally deflate before her eyes. "After all, Ayden is the only one I have."
And she would be after his death.
Same with Kinos, this man's hatred for Ayden was too much as well. He was the one who warned everyone about the death of Kinos who was being killed by Fate, and who fought Ayden before they got away from Atlantis. She could tell by Adolfo's face that he didn't like what she just said, and that was fine with her.
Frowning, he didn't comment at her words until he gently held her right hand and pressed his lips against her skin. She almost shivered with his touch that she pulled her hand instantly.
"You won't be alone any longer…" His deep translucent blue eyes met hers.
Minerva almost forgot about him in her life… about their upcoming wedding. This man happened to be her future husband. It was not hers to decide, but it was for the best of the whole kingdom. They needed a strong leader and she was too vulnerable and had no experience with these matters. She needed him to rule this place.
But—
All she could offer to him was a kingdom and a queen.
Nothing more.
Not even her heart. And her soul.
"You will eventually learn to love me, Minerva." He spoke between clenched teeth, "We will have kids of our own and you will never be alone with me. If only you'll give me a chance to love you completely. If only you will open your heart and love me, too." He took a deep breath before he spoke again, "I don't want to be just your need. I want to be your wants… your desires."
Could he?
"Please leave."
Adolfo narrowed his gaze and if she didn't know better, she'd swear that he was puzzled and in pained with her words. But what was more excruciating is when Adolfo would figure out and read her thoughts, felt her wants, and would notice that he wasn't in there.
Minerva let out a tired breath. "I want to be alone," she uttered without even looking back at him.
Her love was left behind on that seashore where Edmund lived—away from here.
Forever.
*********
"You're insane!" Ivan scowled upon hearing Edmund's stupid idea, or probably the most stupid idea that he ever heard of. "You can't find Atlantis! No one can't! Even the gods are forbidden! Have you ever heard several expeditions and just vanished into thin air? Those are not just rumors! For god's sake, Doctor."
But this man didn't even bother to listen with his rants. He was so sure about this. So damn sure that it almost gave him a slight of pride to his idiotic bravery.
He was walking back and forth while Edmund was preparing for his ride.
"I'm going down there," he said as he made sure that everything was ready, "And I will be the first one who will find that damn city and save Ayden on time."
Ivan rolled his eyes, "Yeah. Like what? Like giving them lectures with histories and stuffs?"
Still, the doctor didn't listen.
Love – such a feeling that he never understood of. His mother sacrificed her own life for her dad, same as what Ayden did to Fate, and what Xien did, too, for Jana. And this time, a mortal like him was willing to take a great risk for her—no doubt.
It was not only for Ayden's life… but for his love.
The Atlantean queen.