MILLIONS OF QUESTIONS ― and a lingering feeling of unease from the previous encounter I've had with that strange man wouldn't let me sleep . i found it was harder to close my eyes , and lay in silence to ignore them for the voice in my head would simply grow clearer as if a monster that feeds on quiet .
and thusly , out of habit my feet had shifted out of the bed ― heading towards the tranquility of the gardens that that served previous queens that resided in the crystal palace .
one would say it was just as quiet , but I differ . the quiet in the gardens wasn't empty ― it was simply rid of any unnecessary noise . there were still millions of sounds suspended in the air if one closed their eyes and just listened .
there was the quiet humming of air , the crunch of fresh grass beneath her feet , and the ever bubbling noise of the water in the small pond dancing in accordance of the rustle of the weeping willow which stood bent over just above .
emily was right , i did have a bias for these places .
standing , i simply listen ; all my questions gone almost instantly . my mind slowly emptying itself , letting the cool brains ease out the worries that lived within .
" penelope ? " a voice . there goes the quiet i was looking for ― i cannot help but muse , bitterly . sighing audibly , i turn to the expected face of duke eckart standing with a trademark stern look on his face .
" father , what brings you here ? " i honestly do not wish to know ; some inner part of my mind wishes for him to take a hint of my expected courtesy , and just leave . but other part wishes to know too , why was he here ?
" the guest chambers have a view of the garden , i saw you coming out so i came to escort you . " ah .. of course you did .
it wasn't new for him to play the doting father ― and most of the time he is sincere ; but it annoys me to think why he does it .
" I'm thankful . " but i don't need it . of course , i don't say that . a gracious woman ought to accept her father's generosity . so instead i let him join me on my stroll .
for most of the part it is silent . neither of us utter a single word ― quiet hanging its ugly head between us in the most awkward way possible . for what would i talk about ? there was no one to put a show of genial conversation in front of , right now , and thus i had nothing to talk about either .
" you have matured a lot , in these months . " he starts , almost causing me to sigh once again . sure he will now praise how well i 'behaved' in the ball , in front of so many people .
" your magical force administration ― the education policies were very well handled . you've done well , sweetling . I'm proud of you . " he adds with a faint grin ― the outlines of which i can see even in the dim light .
something about his earnest smile makes my chest leap ― and for a moment i find myself unable to speak , an unknown weight on my vocal cords .
i regulate my expression into a sweet smile , one that is too practiced . parroted words come out of my mouth which make the duke's smile falter , a look of embarrassment dispersed across his face .
" you are far too kind , thank you , father . "
how does it feel ? ; I want to ask . how does it feel to be alienated ? to be cast away from someone you considered close to you ? hurts , does it not ?
I know it does . all too well .
" i understand , that you feel resentful towards me , penelope . you have every right to ― but please , don't treat me like a stranger ― " the desperation in his words almost makes me falter , but my promise to him remains standing .
i will not forget until my filial affection comes out of genuine love for my father , not as a survival instinct .
" what are you talking about , father ? i would never dare do that ― " i reply , voice honeyed it even makes me feel sick .
" what would people think if the mother of obelian empire was estranged from her own father ? ― you mustn't let such worries cloud your mind . " my hands loop around his arm , hugging it close like any beloved daughter would .
" its not good for your health . come , lets head back so you can get some sleep – shall we ? "