I once had a friend
That when I told to others
They immediately say
'Gurl you better marry him
That's a keeper if I ever saw one'
But that's not how this story begins
And that's not how this story ends
I met him in the fifth grade
Even though I was still so shy
He was the class clown type
And we became buddies quickly
Everyone loved to hang out with him
And he was always trying to make
Every person he could, to laugh
'Is he the type you would
Bring home to meet your mother?'
Well fancy that, it was the other way round
She helped out at my school every day
Better than any other PTSA mom did
And better yet, she was glad I had made a friend
One that was willing to seek me out of my shyness
But as the young ones we were
We didn't stay in touch after leaving
There were hugs and laughter on that day
My mom even took a picture of us
A memento of our friendship, our goodbye
We were too young to talk long distance
So I told my friend I'd miss him, and walked away
Made some new friends that didn't mind I was shy
One in particular had a light that shined so bright
She convinced me to stand on the stage with her
Not once, but twice, and even dance in the front
It was fun while it lasted, but once again they left
I still search for that girl to this very day...
Middle school came and went
High school had the surprise of my life
Because who else did I end up meeting
Than the guy that I befriended in fifth grade
We were once again in the same class
He was still the same, a face full of laughter
And I hadn't changed much either
Still a bunch of shyness and nerves
I must confess that I grew a little jealous
Of the table that drew his attention
He spent his time divided during lessons
Either with me, a quiet ambience of happiness
Or a group of 5 that was raucous with jokes and games
Keeping him as entertained as he kept them
I was sad, but happy that he was having fun
He introduced me to one of them later
And she joined our little atmosphere often
At first I was too shy and indeed a bit envious
But she grew on me, and we became friends too
After that happened, they saw no point
In sitting away from the group
Since they just grabbed me and pulled me along
That year was one of my happiest so far
Everyday I spent with the guy I thought
I would likely never see again
And our friendship was just as tight
No, even better than it originally was
He even helped me foster new relationships
So that when he was sick, I would never sit alone
It was kinda funny how he would only
Do his work when he was paired up with me
But I thought it was cute, just proof of my skill
I managed to get us completely done in record time
So that he could play around without being scolded
When I wasn't laughing alongside, I simply read
As a child I was often target for bullying
I was over weight, soft spoken and shy
An easy mark for someone who was angry
It even got to the point where a group of guys
Followed me around between classes and at lunch
Just to talk smack about me and egg each other on
I stood up for myself, but a girls' voice did nothing
I'm not sure if my friend ever really noticed
But he started walking me to my classes
He would come meet me at the classroom
And help me walk through the crowded corridor
His height making a noticable pathway
I never got smushed against the wall or floor
Whenever he escorted me to the next class
It was more time spent with my friend
Gradually able to feel safety by his side
The hate died down, but curiously enough
Coos and giggles arose in their stead
Couldn't quite make sense of what it was
Until they were relayed back to me by friends
Who had been passing by said occurrences
My school mates fancied us a couple
Everytime they saw us together
Whether that be us sharing food at lunch
Or him helping to carry my books just because
When we waited on each other after school
To walk to the bus lot before hugging goodbye
Or got paired for group assignments
A girl and a guy walking in the hall
Stopped us once, asking the big question
"Are you guys together? You look cute together"
We were both silent, just staring at them for a bit
To them we looked like a picture perfect movie in real life
The star quarter back and the nerdy girl
I'm pretty sure I blushed from the surprise of it
I had no idea how to answer that
Without sounding like I had a crush on him
It was best to leave it to him to explain
Getting it together first, he responded for us
"Nah, we've just been friends since grade school"
They made non-committal sounds, play pouting in disappointment
I had no idea how to say he was like a brother, so I left it be
He soon transferred schools, to one my cousins attended
I had planned on following him the next semester
Happy coincidence since that was my plan
Before he even told me he was going
What were the chances my bestie and I would stay together?!
But the new school year had other ideas for us
I was stuck at the first school, and he was drifting away
I officially lost him, towards the end of the year
When I grew too impatient with the way things stood
Circumstance had it that he was still unruly
The class clown, loved by everyone
But there was no 'me' there to help him focus on work
Too wrapped up in making them laugh that
He was beginning to forget about us, the ones left behind
Once upon a time, I had a crush on him
At least that's what I had thought it was
In reality, I was jealous that I was losing
My best friend, my big brother, to a girl
Who was too insecure and controlling for him
To have friends that were girls, my friend obliged for her
I was sad, but it was only temporary, right?
After that it was just the random thoughts
Of what we used to be, when we hung out
And my unhappiness with how things ended
I didn't even see that what I was going to do
Would be the final rift that threw us off sync
Like a child I believed that confessing would make him mine
That he would choose me because we were so close before
The response was simultaneous
His girlfriend was 'right' and he cut ties with me
Not sure what I expected to happen
It wasn't like he was magically going to transfer back
We would still have been unable to meet
I guess I was just banking on the attention
He would direct my way, so we could chat again
Wishful thinking though, he was taken and I knew it
That was my fault, for rushing things
Burning our bridge due to my impatience
So deciding to try giving him space
I graduated alone, waiting for him to move first
They say to let something go and see if it returns
No need to worry, if it didn't, it was never yours to begin with
It hurts, to know that he really never did
I reached out here and there over the years
Those stupid pass it on games, random pokes
Most of the time he didn't see them, nor respond
But sometimes he would wave back...
The pain of loosing my amigo, my hermano
Rose in intensity the longer this went on
My hopes crushed everytime I read our conversation history
I was distraught so one-sidedly, he wasn't even there often
Sending him one last message, I waited weeks for his reply
Leaving me on read, for my out of the blue goodbye
Was the last blow I could take and keep me together
He had nothing to say when I told him I missed our friendship
Or that I was waiting for him to accept me again
And ignored my meager hopes to meet when we both became famous
I knew he was set on becoming a football player
That it was his dream, and that it was reachable
I always admired the fact that someone else around me
Had a goal and worked towards their dream too
Now no longer a constant thought, but it still is a goal of mine
Hope you're doing well, and I still plan
To meet you in the future, Skyscraper my lost friend