Chapter 1 – Mao Miaomiao
'Damn system! Why is it so hard to kill an MC!?'
Ding
'But you barely taught me anything! I did most of the work!'
<'Wait! I need some hints! How do I kill Xie Tian!?'>
A toned young swordsman with a black katana was kneeling, panting in exhaustion while bickering with the system in his mind. He spat several mouthfuls of blood as he clenched his chest, where the broken rib cage had punctured his lung.
Brown dust blew across the barren wasteland, making it hard for the black katana cultivator to breathe. Red soil dirtied his white robes, arms, and face, but the unyielding eyes of the young man focused on his opponent.
Moonlight from the full moon shone down upon him and his opponent. On the surface of this sub-dimensional plane under the dark sky, two men aimed to kill each other.
10 Meters before the young muscular swordsman with a system, another handsome cultivator stood with a flame saber. He was not in good shape as he was bleeding from all the deep cuts on his arms, legs, and chest. Yet, the opponent of the black katana samurai didn't seem to feel any pain.
"XU MIAO, DIE!!"
The wounded swordsman yelled and charged at the white robe cultivator.
The latter snapped to his senses. He bellowed back, "SCREW YOU, XIE TIAN!!"
Xu Miao, the samurai cultivator, dashed forward and circulated all his yang essence into his black katana. The cursed weapon laughed in a high-pitched voice and released white flame, the demonic flame.
Xie Tian, the protagonist, also injected all his yang essence into his flame saber. He slashed down, planning to cleave Xu Miao in half.
The crimson flame from Xie Tian's saber and the white flame from Xu Miao's katana collided, creating another explosion, engulfing both of them.
Yet, they pressed forward.
"RETURN TO ZERO!!"
Xie Tian activated his trump card.
He could reverse space and time!
"THAT GOLDEN EXPERIENCE KNOCK-OFF AGAIN!? NOT A CHANCE, KILLER QUEEN!!"
.
.
.
= Several Months Earlier =
A muscular man in his 60s was sitting in front of a computer, staring at the bright monitor, reading the details of the new PC MMORPG game. His amputated right leg subconsciously jerked at the recurring phantom pain. Yet, the guy ignored the pain and continued reading the form.
Mao Miaomiao sighed and closed his eyes. He glanced at a framed picture on his PC desk, which was his picture when he won a UFC belt for the first time.
Decades had passed since that glorious day. But for Mao Miaomiao, that event felt like yesterday. Unfortunately, he was too old to compete, and his right leg was no longer with him.
"Haiz. I wish I could still fight," Mao Miaomiao lamented.
"Uncle Cat Meow-Meow, have you registered yet? Stop reading those webnovels and register already! The closed beta will begin tomorrow, so you should hurry! We won't be able to play together if you don't sign up for the closed-beta!"
Miaomiao was sharing his house with his younger brother's family. It was a three-story single house with six bedrooms, which was too large for him to live alone. Of course, he bought this house when he was still an MMA fighter in the UFC.
As Miaomiao was being sentimental, his 12-year-old nephew yelled from another room. The brat was being disrespectful, calling Mao Miaomiao as Cat Meow-Meow.
"I'm filling in the form, Greg!"
"Hurry up! You won't be able to join if the quota is filled!"
"I know, I know."
Miaomiao returned his focus to the monitor. He typed his details into the registration form of the new PC MMORPG game.
Then, he pressed the [Next] button to proceed.
The screen changed. Another website opened up with a questionnaire in it, instead of the regular registration form.
Normally, any gamer would have closed this popup site and gone back to the registration page. However, Mao Miaomiao was a curious old man. He read the questions and answered them anyway without caring whether the site contained a virus or not.
If you can reincarnate or transmigrate into the world of a cultivation novel, would you prefer to be a protagonist, an antagonist, a side character, or a mob character?
"Heroes suck. Their lives are miserable throughout the story. They usually win in the end, but I don't like the hardship that they have to go through. Hell, some of them are downright mass-murderers! I prefer living a slow-life with moderate struggles. A side-character will do."
Why did you choose a side-character?
"As I said, heroes suck dick! Side characters are more carefree!"
What kind of side-character do you want to be?
"A neutral one! I have no F to give to MCs or villains!"
Aren't you afraid of being killed by protagonists or antagonists?
"Screw you! I was once a UFC champion! I can ground-and-pound those Kang-Fools that can only do flashy moves to oblivion!"
The questionnaire was entertaining and interesting. Miaomiao had fun answering each question with trolling answers.
But after a while, the open questions turned into a multiple-choice question.
If you were to be transmigrated as a side-character in a cultivation world, which skill, item, or cheats would you prefer to have with you?
A hundred choices and a time limit appeared. Mao Miaomiao only had a minute to answer this question.
He was frustrated that he couldn't read through all the selectable answers since the time limit was too short, "Damn, you freaking stupid questionnaire providers! You're supposed to give me unlimited time to decide!"
Although Mao Miaomiao complained, his eyes skimmed through the answers with determination as if he was answering the TOEIC official test.
'A smartphone with cheat apps? Too materialistic. What if someone steals it from me? Not interested.'
'Max level with a million status points? Boring. What if I sleep-walk and destroy the goddamn world by accident? What if I run into someone stronger than me? I couldn't raise my level anymore, right?'
'Necromancy? I don't want to play with corpses and skeletons. Too depressing!'
'Taming Arts? Too reliant on subordinates! If I can't find or tame a strong beast, won't I be shitty forever?'
'Save and Load feature? Not gonna lie, it's tempting. But my gaming experience taught me the hard way that it can also have its problems. I often overwrote my save files and screwed up royally in the late game, which was irreversible. Then, I had to start a new game or load a save file with 200 hours less playtime. I don't want to mess up like that again since there is only one file slot for the save. Regrettably, I can't pick this.'
30 Seconds remaining!
"Ugh!"
The pressure was real. Miaomiao panicked, and it influenced his decision making.
Still, he was an experienced fighter who had faced many worse crises. He paced his breath and concentrated.
'I had read a bunch of wuxia novels during my free time. If I could answer it freely, I would have answered "I don't need any special skill. I just won't mess with the MC or villains." instead of picking skills to survive.'
Since they gave Miaomiao multiple choices, he read the answer choices carefully.
Demonic Yin Yang System – This cultivation assistance system can help you increase your cultivation strength by copulating with cultivators of the opposite sex. Furthermore, it contains a built-in shop system that you can buy various goodies with your essence.
That was a brief description of one of the choices that caught Miaomiao's attention.
Among all the items and perks, the dual-cultivation choice seemed the most attractive since nobody hated sex. Even though it sounded evil, Miaomiao couldn't help but imagine himself doing it with many women and getting stronger in the process.
Ten seconds remaining.
'Ah, screw this. There's a time limit and I can only pick one. If I were to live my next life in a cultivation world, I should go with something that I can enjoy. This stupid thing, [Demonic Yin Yang System], will do.'
Miaomiao picked the choice and moved on to the next question. However, he didn't remember anything after he had pressed the [Next] button.
…
"Uncle Cat Meow Meow, are you done!?"
The 12-year-old boy slammed the door open to look for his uncle, but he found no one. He tilted his head in confusion.
"Who is uncle cat meow meow?"
He forgot about Mao Miaomiao's existence. He didn't even know why he came to this room in the first place.
The boy didn't notice the webpage that the monitor was showing. He closed the door and ran to his dad.
"Dad, since when do we have an empty room on the third floor?"
…
You have been chosen, Mao Miaomiao.
Demonic Yin Yang System has been uploaded to the host.
Quest System has been uploaded.
System Shop has been uploaded.
Searching for a compatible cultivation world.
Warning, multiple protagonists have been detected.
Evaluating the host.
Adjusting the system difficulty to match the world's difficulty.
The adjustment has been completed. The difficulty setting has been set to [Progressive: Hard].
Good Luck, Mao Miaomiao. Your every action will be watched.
Entertain us, mortal!
The monitor and the PC turned off by itself. The history, registry files, and all records about Mao Miaomiao were erased automatically. Even the framed picture on his table faded away.
No one remembered him, including his brother. It was as if he had never even existed in this world.