We are sitting in Julian's office drinking and I don't mean tea. I have 4 fingers of whiskey in my glass just like the other two men here. What the fuck was that? Is all that keeps going in my head. We had a daughter. Oh god, no wonder she hates us both. I lift my glass and down half of it. It's to quite in here way to quite. I put the glass on Julian's desk and just let my head hang down. How could this be?
We had to get Julian when she wouldn't come to us in the mist. Julian is a guide and can get through to people by taking the shape of what the most desire but how do you give back your wife what she wants most when their gone.
"Fuck! This is not how this is supposed to be." I trawl it as I shoot up from the chair to start pacing.
"How long did Lexi carry her?" Voughn asks in a near whisper.
"Almost 5 months. If she had been here I could have helped but she was sent back and couldn't have survived there. Shaw held on for as long as she could but in the end she knew it had to be her to go." Julian tells us.
"What to tou mean it was her choice to go?" I ask not understanding this.
"Shaw, your daughter was fully conscious during the pregnancy. Lexi would talk to her and sing to her but Shaw knew this was not her world and she couldn't survive in it. So she lasted as long as she could for her mother. But in the end she knew she was killing her and took her own life to save her mother's." Julian tells us while tears leave his eyes. He got to know her our daughter and now he's grieving for her loss.
My legs give out and I sit hard in the chair I lift a few minutes ago.
"They talked to each other?" I ask I have to know.
"Yes Vance. The bond you guys had with her transfer to your daughter to keep Lexi alive. If it hadn't she would have been dead years ago. Lexi can't live without being bonded now because she was so young." Again Julian just tells us what we need to know.
But I see where this is heading. When she got back to her world and was in the coma she needed to have an anchor to keep her life force going and subsequently she found Shaw a small child inside her to bond to and also Shaw needed the same thing so the bonded together from the start both being young and not knowing any better. So now we have to get her to trust us to bond to us again because Lexi can't have one bond but she needs two just like we need one for the both of us. Well fuck. This seems impossible.
"How do we get her to let us in again?" Voughn ask Julian.
It seems weird asking another man this but with Julian being our doctor and with his powers he know Lexi now better than we do.
"I have no clue guys. With everything that's happened to her I don't know what to tell you." Julian says with a dumbfounded look on his face.
" But you need to finish the blood bond she's not stable at all. She's never grieved for Shaw or her loss of her parents since they cut her off and stopped having anything to do with her because she was pregnant. I think you need to get her to open up and grieve then work on being her anchor's. I believe that's the first step." With that said Julian knocks back his whole glass of whiskey.
"What do you mean she's not stable?" I ask because it bugging the fuck out of me.
"I didn't want to tell you but Lexi tried to kill herself twice now in last 3 years she wants to be with Shaw. She's been hospitalized for it, I can tell you she's a really good actress. Lexi had them all believing she was getting better and moving on." Julian says this while looking at both of us.
Oh fuck. What have we done by being so competitive? All of this could have been avoided if we just stop to think about her more than just as ours. She was what we needed but did we ever think of what she needed or wanted. Nope not once. Did we ever listen to her when she said she didn't like Trance, nope not at all. And the bitch of it is he still works for us.
I turn to look at my brother and I say,
"I don't know about you but I'm going to kill that SOB when he gets back."
I'm deadly serious.
"Oh I'm with you on that Vance but first Brent will integrate him to find out who's behind that little lying ass snake." Voughn says and he lifts his glass and tosses back the whiskey in it.
Hmmm, Brent hasn't work in awhile and once Julian fills him in on everything that's happened to Lexi he'll have a field day with Trance. I smile to myself as I pick up my glass and down the rest of my whiskey.
"Well let's go brother and finish our blood bond with our wife. We need her stable and she needs us more." I say to Voughn as I hold open the door for him to leave Julian's office.
Once we're back on our wife's room a level of despair comes over me and I know it's coming from her Julian was right she's hasn't let herself grieve for any of it. And now that's lead us to this.
I look over at him and he just nods and with that we walk over to her sleeping form.
This will be easier on her this way. With that thought I hold her head back and open her mouth as Voughn's fangs drop down and he bites into his own arm. Once he lifts his head he quickly places the wound to her open mouth and whispers to her to drink.
It takes a minute but she starts to pull and swallow from him. I sigh in relief, a part of her doesn't hate us we still have a chance.
Once Voughn is done I repeat the process but I add,
"I'm so sorry babygirl that I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most but I'll never let you down like that again. I love you Lexi."
When it's done we grab a couple of chairs and sit and wait for her to wake up again. This time she'll have an anchor to grab on to.