Chapter XXXIII: A Crossroads
(Daphne P.O.V)
Since meeting Harry, Daphne had experienced her fair share of insanity within the castle. She'd been looked down upon, teased, harassed, but never before had she been looked at with such veneration. It had almost made her feel sick to her stomach the way people would approach her, asking for her to tell Harry they believed him the whole time, desperate to try to get back into his good graces. The truth of the matter was Harry didn't care, and the way he'd simply stare blankly at the white walls of the hospital room, she was worried if the boy still cared about anything anymore.
When Harry had first awoken, he'd told Dumbledore, Moody, Sirius everything that had happened. He'd told them about how Voldemort had used the imperious curse on Barty Crouch Senior, how it was his mother's writing of his name that was inputted into the goblet, how Karkaroff was loyal to Voldemort, though his mysterious absence from the castle had made that painfully clear… Finally, he told them how it had been her very father that had revived the Dark Lord. She'd wanted to throw up when she heard the news, Father, she whispered in her mind, Why?
Those thoughts were put on the backburner, however, as she approached the hospital wing. Harry was finally set to be able to leave after what had felt like years of confinement to his bed, and Daphne was feebly hoping the news would have made her boyfriend happier. Yet, to her great disappointment, Harry hadn't been looking any better, his arms and forehead still wrapped in white bandages lined with pain-relief ointment, his eyes hollow as they gazed numbly through her.
Hopelessly, she forced a smile to her face as she walked towards Harry, sitting in the wooden stool Sirius had occupied day and night until hearing that Harry's status had stabilized. "Hey Flyboy," She whispered, "Did you hear the news?" Harry didn't say a word, not even motioning as he continued to stare far into the distance, "You're finally going to be able to leave the hospital today, the train is leaving tomorrow morning too so you'll have time to pack. I can- I can send Dobby to help you if you want-"
Harry's eyes sank at the mention of another house-elf and instantly Daphne had felt her heart in her throat, "Sorry, I shouldn't have mentioned it." Harry remained silent, his eyes dull as she removed an apple from her book bag, drawing her wand to act as a knife. "End of Year exams went well for all of us, at least, everyone thinks they did okay. Things have been crazy lately around the castle, but I'm sure that Michael and Neville will be up to see you later. I'd understand if you'd want to talk to them instead of me." She motioned the apple towards Harry's limp hands, "But please Harry, you need to at least eat something."
She gazed on helplessly, watching as a glossy substance appeared in the corner of Harry's eyes, quiet tears rolling down his cheeks without warning. "I'm sorry," Daphne whispered, "I want to help you, I want to do something to stop the pain you're feeling, but I'm not good at these kinds of things. Please, Harry, tell me what I can do, I can't take seeing you like this."
"I'm sorry," Harry whispered the first words in days finally leaving his mouth, "I tried, I tried my best but I couldn't stop him." Harry's fingers clutched his bed sheets tightly, his fingers curling under the tremendous strain as he whimpered, "I failed, Cedric and Kreacher are dead because I failed."
Daphne's hand moved forward, but stopped on its own, her body trembling as her eyes locked with Harry's watery orbs. What do I say? She thought frantically, What can I say? She didn't have a chance to even formulate a sentence, however, before a girl called out, her own voice shaking, her French accent apparent as she called out, "Harry?"
Daphne turned facing the former French Champion, her own eyes red. She must have been crying recently too, Daphne thought as Fleur approached slowly, "Sorry," She whispered, "I- I didn't mean to interrupt." Daphne waved out the French Girl's worry, in all honesty, Daphne was glad a distraction had arrived as Fleur approached Harry's bedside, "How are you?" She asked weakly, though everyone in the castle answered relatively the same way.
Harry simply shrugged, his eyes meeting Fleur as she whispered, "They're calling me the Triwizard Champion, I've been awarded the Cup and the prize money but," Daphne watched as Fleur rubbed her hands nervously, "If it wasn't for you Harry, I'd have been dead, I don't deserve the title or the prize. You're welcome to it if you want."
"Donate the money to St. Mungos," Harry whispered, "Burn the cup. I don't want to see it." Fleur nodded without resistance to either idea as he once more turned to face her, "Thank you, for everything."
"I should be the one that's thanking you," Fleur said with a weak smile, "The Beauxbatons' Carriage is leaving tonight back home. I wasn't sure if you were going to be able to attend-," The funeral, Daphne finished the sentence in her head as Fleur swallowed her words, "I just want to make sure I told you thank you and goodbye. If you ever need anything, Harry, I owe you my life."
"When is it?" Harry whispered faintly, "Cedric's funeral."
Daphne had wanted protest against Harry going, not wanting her boyfriend to relive the memories, but judging by his partial catatonic state, she assumed he already was. She sighed as she whispered back, "It's tonight, on the pitch, after dinner." Harry nodded his attention focusing on the ground before Daphne whispered, "Come on, let's get you out of bed, its almost time for dinner anyway." Harry neither nodded nor protested as she motioned to Fleur to help lift Harry, The Boy-Who-Lived using the two girls as crutches as he rose to his feet for the first time in days.
"How's your balance?" Daphne whispered, "Can you stand?" Harry nodded slowly as Fleur slowly crawled out from underneath his arms, and feeling no excess weight against her, Daphne too unloaded herself from Harry, her hand now sliding to take his, and much to her relief Harry hadn't shaken it off.
The three had left the hospital wing and Daphne couldn't help but notice the way those in the hallways would stare as they descended towards the Great Hall. "Why do they all look at me like that?" Harry muttered, watching as every person he had made contact with looked down or simply moved out of the way."
"They saw you make the Dark Lord bleed, even Dumbledore could only fight him to a standstill," Fleur whispered, "The picture of you straddled over the Dark Lord fracturing his pitiful excuse of a nose with your punch is all over the newspapers. The public, they're hailing you like some kind of god." Fleur glanced around watching as Harry's presence simply made the sea of people part, "Those that looked down on you have been asking all of your friends to help get back on your good side, they think it's their best bet for protection."
Daphne watched a glimpse of frustration, the first emotion Harry had expressed after the Third Task flashed to his face momentarily before he whispered, "A god would have been able to save Kreacher and Cedric."
Harry, Daphne thought weakly as the boy took the lead, the doors to the Great Hall now in view. Yet, unlike the normal display of the hall, this time, the lights were dim and the banners that hung above the tables were colored black in mourning. She watched her boyfriend, hoping the sight of his friends now standing at their tables would fill him with joy, but Harry hadn't even seemed to acknowledge their existence, dropping her hand and heading towards the table. Her eyes had locked with Astoria, her sister's normally bright eyes dropping at Harry's less than enthusiastic return. Go easy on him, Daphne mouthed towards her sister who nodded in understanding, but part of Daphne was frightened that the boy was now broken beyond repair. This wasn't like what happened to Blaise, for the first time in his life, she knew Harry was facing the fact that he'd allowed a friend to die.
(Harry P.O.V)
A god, Harry scoffed at the nonsense, his eyes reflecting off his empty plate. None of them would think that if they saw what really happened. He looked down at his fist, the cuts and bruises were healed, but the vibration of his impact with Voldemort's face was ever-present. All that work, Harry cursed, All that training, and all I could land was one hit.
"You don't understand just how minuscule your power is compared to mine," The Dark Lord's words echoed through Harry's mind, forcing him to relive the moment in which the light had left Cedric's eyes. "The weak don't get to choose how they die." Harry clutched his head, his fingers digging deep into his scalp. He wanted to scream, he wanted to throw the damn table across the room. But he couldn't, he was the focus of everyone's attention, he was feeling suffocated, but he could do nothing. For as sheep-like as the wizarding world was, he knew that they needed a hero. One thing was for sure though, Harry wasn't feeling like one.
His body jolted at the touch of another hand, his wand out before he could even turn, his green eyes centering on the fear that had built-in Astoria's kaleidoscopic pools as Harry held his wand to her throat. His blood had begun to race through his body, his breathing becoming sporadic as Astoria whispered, "Harry? What are you doing?"
The sound of the laughing Death Eaters rang through his skull before his focus began to clear, "Astoria," He whispered weakly, dropping his wand to the ground, his hands trembling, "Sorry, I'm sorry."
The shorter girl reached forward, grabbing his arm holding him tightly as with a confident voice, masking the shock, she whispered, "It's okay. We're all okay. We're safe here Harry. It's just that-," The break forced Harry to look around noticing how the hall had emptied, "You were in a trance, I figure I shouldn't have broken you from it before everyone was gone. But, they're walking down to the pitch, are you ready to go?"
Numbly Harry nodded, his eyes catching the quickest glimpse of Daphne, Michael, and Neville all waiting at the door, their expressions all equally blank as he followed the younger Gryffindor to the door. Their small procession had ventured to the pitch in silence, the falling rain reminding him of the frightening graveyard as slowly they'd begun to weave through the crowd, people parting at Harry's approach. Though Harry was focused solely on the boy's body that rested peacefully in the mahogany casket, a Hufflepuff flag covering his unmoving frame.
He looked like he saw sleeping, his steel-grey eyes shut, his face no longer curled from the pain of Bellatrix's curse. But he wasn't sleeping, Cedric Diggory, a man who Harry deeply admired was dead, and though he knew better than to blame himself, he couldn't rid the guilt and anger that grew in his chest. His throat had grown hot as Dumbledore took the stand, to his right Amos Diggory and his wife, the two looking barely able to stand, to his left, Professor Sprout, the plump woman looking completely dejected.
"Students, Faculty, and Friends, thank you all for joining me today for the celebration of the life of one of Hogwarts' best, sixth-year prefect, Cedric Diggory." Harry watched as the students bowed their head at the boy's name, some whispering prayers, others remaining silent, though Harry did nothing, simply looking through Dumbledore, his eyes never leaving Cedric's sight. "The third task concluded, as we all know, with a really terrible loss. Cedric Diggory was; as you all know… exceptionally hard-working...infinitely fair-minded… and most importantly a fierce, fierce friend."
Harry swallowed hard, "So much so, that he sacrificed his life, a gift so precious, for the chance that two others may live." Dumbledore's voice hardened as he spoke, "We all saw with our eyes that Cedric Diggory was murdered, in cold blood by the likes of Lord Voldemort and his Death Eaters. Now the pain that we all feel at this dreadful loss reminds me; reminds us, that while we may come from different places and speak in different tongues our hearts beat as one."
Harry scoffed at the notion, the faces that surrounded him once taking great glee in the mocking of he and Cedric. Harry turned, his shoulder brushing against Astoria as the crowd grew silent watching as he began his walk towards the castle door, stopped only by the young Gryffindor's arm wrapped around his wrist. "You should stay," She whispered softly.
"Why?" Harry barked out, "To watch as people lie about the memories and respect they held Cedric in? To watch as people cry tears over a man who they disrespect? A man who saved my life. A man that I failed to save."
"There was no way you could have known what was going to happen, you can't blame yourself for his death, you can't blame yourself for either of their deaths," Astoria pushed back forcefully, the weight of a thousand eyes falling upon the two of them, "This wasn't your fault, you-,"
"That's the point!" Harry roared, the fury inside him exploding, "I trained so hard! I did everything I could! They both still died!" The courage that had once filled Astoria's face vanished as Harry looked down into his little sister's eyes, "Why the hell do you think knowing it wasn't my fault would make me feel any better?"
Harry brushed the young girl's hand off being met by a wall of Neville and Michael the two looking at Harry in agony, "You shouldn't be alone right now," Michael whispered offering out his hand but Harry didn't reach, Michael now at the receiving end of one of Harry's glares.
"You're bleeding," Neville whispered motioning towards Harry's bandaged arm, a wound reopening in Harry's fury.
"I'm going to give you an order, not as a friend, but as the leader of the Order," Harry whispered to the two Fourth Year boys, "Get out of my way." Harry hadn't waited a moment longer as he pushed himself between Michael and Neville, watching as the crowds parted for him once more, his sight focused upon the castle's wall.
Harry had felt like he was moving in a daze, though his legs carried him exactly to where he wanted to be, the emptiness of the castle making his journey much faster. Within moments he found himself within an isolated room, no bigger than a crawl space. Harry raced into the corner, throwing his head back and screaming, the anger in his chest finally releasing as he slammed his fist against the floor furiously, his once clean white bandages now dripping red. He stopped for a moment, the pain barely registering as he placed his head to the ground, his arms hugging his waist a feeling of nausea looming over him. Though it clearly wasn't the only thing as to Harry's surprise, a shadow had formed around him, the caster looking down on him.
He felt shocked before looking up, finding the electric blue-eyed Auror standing over him, the room expanding to adjust for his size. Harry didn't even have to ask a question as Moody whispered, "I figured this is the kind of room you'd have wanted. We're a lot alike after all." Harry looked up in confusion at the elderly Auror, his moldy coat dripping from the rain, "After my first mission, things hadn't gone the way I'd hoped. I lost two team members that day, it was the first time since my parents that I'd seen people I cared for die in front of me."
Harry gazed on at the grizzled Auror, "Wish I had one of these myself back then, the Ministry didn't really believe in psych evaluations for their Aurors during my time, not that their much better now, but back when I was a rookie, mourning a loss was a sign of weakness. Didn't stop me from wanting to scream and cry as I watched my comrades get buried." The older wizard reached out his hand, Harry taking it carefully, quickly being pulled to his feet, "The good news is that it gets easier over time, that I can promise. The bad news is, like it or not, the elf and the Diggory boy aren't going to be the only casualties moving forward. That's the nature of war."
"I'm not sure that I want to fight one anymore," Harry muttered out, unable to look his mentor in the eyes.
"And what good would that do?" Moody barked, "If that's how you feel you might as well pull your cock out and piss on Cedric's body, maybe take a shit on the elf while you're at it." Harry flinched at the crudeness of the Auror's statement, the man's grip on his shoulder growing tighter. "I understand how you feel boy, you lost your confidence that you could overcome any obstacle, you lost your belief in your own strength, and now you lost a man you admired. You've lost so many things." Harry felt as if he couldn't breathe at the barrage of words Moody had started, "As you are now, you're a worthless excuse of a wizard, so consumed by dark clouds of regret, fear, and guilt that you can't even see the light at the end of this seemingly infinite tunnel."
"It's hard boy, to learn that you aren't as indestructible as you might believe, but you have to defeat those feelings!" Moody shouted, "You can't simply count everything that is lost. What's lost is lost, it's never going to come back! Instead, you need to focus on what you still have!"
You're such a pain, Potter, Michael's voice rang teasingly in his head. Do you really think I can be a great wizard? The sight of Neville's smile filled his mind. Stop playing with my hair Flyboy, Daphne chuckled, I'm trying to focus here. You've gotta teach me that spell, you just have too! Astoria's eager tone flooding his heart. You're going to be an Uncle soon Harry! The feeling of Sirius' letter almost manifesting in his hands, "I still have my friends," Harry whispered, "I still have my family."
"That's right," Moody called out the weight on Harry's shoulder shifting as Moody continued, "And the Dark Lord wants to take each and every single one of them away from you! So tell me, boy! Are you going to allow that to happen?!"
"No," Harry whispered, strength returning to his voice, "No matter the cost, I will become stronger. I will protect everyone."
Silence fell over the room as a confident smirk rose to Moody's face, "That's what I wanted to hear. Looks like the Dark Lord didn't take your spine at least. I'll have someone collect your things. Get yourself in order and say your goodbyes to your friends, you won't be riding back with them."
"What?" Harry asked, his brow furrowed, "Why not?"
The man dug through his pocket pulling out a letter that read: From Sirius, with the Black Family Crest sealed on it, something Harry knew only active members of the House of Black could cast. He took the letter from the Auror, his eyes quickly scanning his Godfather's words.
Moody,
These last few days have made the truth painfully clear to me, and the rise of Voldemort only solidifies the facts. I'm not capable of training my Godson, my love for him won't allow me to fight with an intent to kill. It pains me to admit, but I see now that Harry needs a rigorous training routine and I am not fit to administer it. I know that time is running out, but I beg you, please ensure my Godson is strong enough to win, ensure that my Godson will survive.
-Black
Harry looked down at the note, his finger creasing the paper before Moody called out, "I have three months to make you strong and figure out what the hell is happening in that head of yours. With classes and this Triwizard Tournament going on, I wasn't quite able to train you the way I had wished. But now, you're all mine, boy." Harry watched as the Auror turned, opening the door back into the deserted hall, "The next time you enter these halls," The Auror said with a smirk, "I'll have made a man out of you."
"We leave right after the train departs," Moody hissed, "Be there on time or there will be hell to pay. From this moment on boy, you are more than just my student, you're my disciple, and I expect greatness from you."
Harry stood his eyes focused on the back of Moody's head as with a triumphant roar, he called out, "Yes, Sir!"
(Daphne P.O.V)
Daphne had awoken at the crack of dawn exhausted, she had gone to bed late with she, Michael, and Neville scouring the entire castle for Harry, yet finding nothing. The anger that had erupted from Harry as he left the ceremony had put her in a panic, and she feared that the boy had gone off and done something stupid. She had called upon Dobby, asking for the elf to once more retrieve the Marauder's Map, but the elf had reported back saying that Harry's bed and cabinets had been completely cleaned out.
She'd begun to feel nauseous, pacing around her dormitory before exhaustion had finally caught up to her, Tracey telling her that she had been responsible for dragging the sleeping Daphne to her bed. Harry, she muttered softly in her mind, Where are you? Silently she rose from her bed, heading towards the showers to prepare for the long day of travel ahead of her, already making arrangements for Astoria to leave with Damyan as soon as they arrived at Platform 9 ¾. She had felt disgusted to say it, but she had become more trusting of strangers than her own father in regards to Astoria's safety and at the very least, the boy had been trying to help.
Her eyes fell upon the Bulgarian Boy's book on Blood Curses, her chest tightening at the idea that Astoria still had a chance. She'd been hoping to read the book in peace following the Triwizard Tournament, but the events that had taken place were far from peaceful. She sighed, tucking the book into her over-the-shoulder bag, slinging it over her white blouse before rubbing out her jeans. I'll find him on the train, she said determinedly, Even if I have to check every compartment on that damn train I will find him.
The cool summer breeze struck her face as she walked towards the Hogsmeade Station, the carriages just arriving at the small village. She scanned the town feverishly, looking for any semblance of those emerald green eyes, both Tracey and Blaise and equal high alert. Yet as they stepped atop the wooden floorboards of the Hogsmeade Station Platform, Harry was nowhere to be found. Though standing across from them she found the huddle of Michael, Neville, Hermione, and Astoria all doing the same, shouting his name out into the crowd.
She rushed towards the group, Astoria sending her a quick smile before Michael asked, "Any luck finding him?" Daphne shook her head solemnly as Michael sighed, "Damn it, I got up early to search the grounds too, no sign of him. You don't think something happened to him, do you?"
"Knowing Harry," Tracey stated, "I can't exactly say it's an impossibility." Daphne scowled at her friend before she meekly whispered, "Sorry, but it's the truth you know? The boy's just a magnet for trouble."
"She's not wrong about that," His voice called out as Daphne turned facing the boy, the scar on his forehead forfeiting his identity with ease. She raced towards him, tackling him with a hug as she whispered her concerns, chastising him for worrying her. "Sorry," Harry whispered, "I didn't mean to worry you all, I just- I needed a moment to think."
"Think about what?" Daphne whispered her voice growing with concern at Harry's ominous tone.
"I'm not going to go back with you guys," Harry replied, "I wish I could, but I can't. We all have the same destination, but the path I have to follow, it's different from all of you. At least for the summer, this is where we split ways."
"Split ways?" Michael called out, "What the hell does that mean? And what do you mean you have to follow a different path? Stop being so cryptic Potter, we're in this together, remember?"
"I know that," Harry said with a calm nod, "Which is why I came to talk to you. You should dedicate as much of the summer as you can to training. With him back, war is now just on the horizon, and trust me when I say this, none of you are ready." Michael swallowed hard as Daphne stepped closer towards her boyfriend, "The way we all are now, if we come face to face with Voldemort again, we'll all die. That's not me fearmongering either, all of us need to put ourselves through hell if we even want a chance at victory."
"I get that we have to train," Neville replied, "But… why does that mean you can't train with us?"
"Because he'll be training with me, Longbottom," Moody barked out, the Auror somehow manifesting himself behind Harry in a blink of an eye, "Exclusively." The Auror pushed forward, and Daphne shivered as his eye fell upon her, "But like the boy was saying, that doesn't mean any of you should shirk on your training."
"Of the lot of you," Moody snarled, "After the boy here, Corner is the strongest, followed closely behind by Longbottom. The rest of you have pitifully low magical presences in comparison. Those two may not be able to hold out for long," Moody growled pointing towards both Michael and Neville, "But at least they wouldn't be a liability in a fight. The same cannot be said for the rest of you."
The sound of the train's whistle blew through the platform as Daphne locked eyes with her boyfriend, a gentle smile on his face as he reached out, his palm cupping her cheeks, "I wish I could spend my summer going to observatories with you again this year, but I don't have any more time to waste." Daphne smiled remembering their first date in the muggle world as Harry continued, "I just came back to say goodbye, and to give you this."
Harry pulled her hand out, opening it as she felt something metallic slip into her palm. She waited as Harry removed his hand before catching a glimpse of the object. It was a thinly chained necklace, the center of which being pure emerald which matched his eyes perfectly. "It's an emergency charm, I asked Sirius to send it to me last night, Moody and I worked on the enchantments all night. But basically," Harry said raising his wrist, a watch-like band on his right wrist, "Call my name into the gem and I'll come. It's a reverse Portkey of sorts, but it's only got a one time use."
She looked down softly at the necklace, her fingers rolling the emerald between her spaces as she felt Harry place his hand on her chin, "You mean more than you know to me, Princess, please keep that on at all times. I can't- I can't lose you, no matter what I can't lose you."
"What are we, chopped liver?" Michael called out sarcastically before Tracey slammed his head down with her fist.
"Shut up they're having a moment." The Auburn Hair growled as a gentle smile rose to both Daphne and Harry's lips.
"I'll miss you," Daphne whispered back as Harry lunged forward catching her lips with his, his hand pulling her frame closer to his chest, forcing the release of a gentle moan."
"I'll miss you too," Harry whispered back, the two pulling apart as Harry put forth his best smile, "Stay safe and train hard!" Daphne watched as her boyfriend's smile grew even larger, "I promise you, the next time we meet, I'll be strong enough to protect all of you!"
"We're in this together Rook," Michael called out extending his fist, "No matter what."
Harry nodded, bumping the blue-haired boy's fist, "Yeah Chipper, no matter what." Daphne watched as her boyfriend smiled, that beautifully infamous lopsided grin, taking her hand into his once more, "Go," He whispered, "You don't want to miss your train."
"I'll see you at the wedding," Daphne said, "You better not make me go stag."
"And miss seeing you in a beautiful dress," Harry said with a chuckle, "Not a chance."
She smiled nodding as she turned from Harry, though the boy's body had begun to feel like it was some kind of gravitational force. She'd wanted to stay with him, to train with him, but as hard as it was to admit, Harry was right. He was the chosen one, the prophecy had made that clear, he was destined to walk a different path. But even if that was the case, that didn't mean she couldn't be there to support him.
The gravitational pull broke as she entered the Hogwarts Expressing turning to see that Harry had never taken his eyes off her, her heart pounding with joy as she looked down for a moment at her wrist. She pushed the markings towards the window, earning her a smile as Harry lifted his matching ones to meet hers. "You're not the only one who's going to grow this summer, next time you see me, I'll be able to heal any of your injuries, I promise."
The loud whistle of the train blared once more as Daphne whispered, her eyes watching the boy's winning smile, "Stay safe, Harry," Her heart thundered in her chest as she felt the train begin to move, "I love you, Flyboy."
Book 2 End!