Chapter 10 - The Northern Star
Bella's father had been overjoyed about her engagement to Kingsley, her mother less so. Kingsley Shacklebolt was terribly close to being a blood traitor, but he was too powerful a wizard, too well connected, and of course, he was the last heir to one of the Sacred-Twenty Eight lines.
If she wanted to marry a pureblood of wealth and status, her parents would not stop her.
Kingsley own family was gone, but he had someone else in mind to 'approve' their engagement.
"No."
"She's my best friend, Bells."
"No, she betrayed us."
"She fell in love."
"No."
Kingsley cupped her face in his large hands, "You miss her, it is a wound on your heart that bleeds anew every day. Do you truly care what other people think of you enough to never see her again."
"I will be cast out of the family."
"You will be a Shacklebolt, and I never stopped being Andromeda's friend. Bella, you haven't even met her baby, she's three years old now."
Bella's heart hurt, "Kingsley…"
"Bells. She will be at the wedding. She will be a part of my life. And you can either go apologize to her now, or let her steal your thunder at the wedding."
She gritted her teeth, it went against everything she had been raised to be to forgive, and to ask for forgiveness?
But she wanted to see her again, she wanted to run with Andromeda when she left, mudblood or no.
If Kingsley was her rock, her Earth grounding her, Andromeda was her north star.
So she took Kingsley proffered hand and decided to do what she had been longing to do for years.
She followed her stars.
Andromeda Tonks was not particularly rejoiceful at being a housewife. But Nymphadora was starting to get older now which meant more outings. It was a bit sad that she had to spell her daughter's features into brown hair, pale skin, and tawny eyes. But it was worth it in the long wrong.
Rain or shine, Andromeda would take her daughter to the seashore. They would play in the sand, play tag with the waves, and when no one was looking, Andromeda would stretch her magic shifting the waves and the winds.
She loved her life, her daughter, her husband, even if living in the muggle world sometimes felt suffocating, even if not seeing her sisters, not knowing if they were okay, killed a part of her.
So it was briefest moments of relief, of adoration, that she opened her door to see Bella hesitating on her stoop.
"Mama! Is Papa home early!?" Nymphadora called, running into the back of Andromeda's legs.
Andromeda pulled her wand, and stepped in front of her daughter, in the process knocking her over.
She went down with a soft omf on her butt, but she didn't cry. No, the only times her daughter ever let out a sound of pain was when something landed on her. The poor girl spent most of her days falling over her own feet. Everything in the house, every lamp and bookshelf was spelled with a sticking charm for a good reason.
"I will kill you," Andromeda said in a low voice to her sister.
Bella didn't look the least bit perturbed by her threat, though she did look nervous about speaking.
Surprisingly, it was Kingsley who defused the situation, coming up behind Bella and wrapping an arm around her waist. "We come in peace."
Andromeda stared at them, then saw the ring on her sister's finger. But she waited for Bella to speak before she lowered her wand.
Seeming to know that, Bella said, "I'm sorry, alright. I hate the choice you made but you're still mine."
As apologies went, that sucked. "If you raise a finger, a wand, or spell at my daughter, my husband, or any of the muggles I will end you."
Bella rolled her eyes, "Fine."
Sheathing her wand, Andromeda turned and picked up her daughter, who had been waiting impatiently with arms crossed, pouting at being ignored.
"Bella this is my daughter Nymphadora, Nymphadora, this is your Aunt Bellatrix."
Nymphadora looked at the near identical copy of her mother and easily replicated her features and held out her arms, "Aunt Bellati!"
Bella held out her arms for the child, smiling, she hadn't thought she liked children but if they were all as cute as her niece and Peverell's son, she might reconsider. "That's what Teddy called me, Bellati."
"Who's Teddy?" Nymphadora asked, as Andromeda reluctantly passed over her daughter, again reaching for her wand.
"He's the son of a professor at Hogwarts, he's your age and guess what else?"
"What?" the girl asked, eyes bright.
"He's a metamorphmagus just like you," Bella said, tapping the tip of her nose playfully.
Andromeda's heart skipped. She felt like she had just fallen down a rabbit hole. One, her sister was her being kind to her daughter but she had just confirmed a dream of her three-year-old daughter had a few weeks ago.
"He's my friend!" Nymphadora twisted to see her, "Teddy's my friend, Mama!"
Bella grinned, not understanding the significance of what had just happened. "I'm sure the professor would like you to be friends with his son. He's a very good wizard. He saved me from an attack when we first met."
"You were attacked?" Andromeda asked, drawn from her thoughts, fury raising at anyone who would dare hurt one of her sisters.
"I-" her voice broke, and very-un-Bella-like she looked ashamed, "I made some mistakes."
Andromeda couldn't stand the hurt on her face, and pulled her sister into her arms. She might have been older but Bella had always been Andromeda's to tend. Bella seemed to slump in her arms, Nymphadora hugging her aunt tight between them. The little girl said warmly, "It's okay, Aunt Bellati, everyone makes mistakes, we still love you."
Bella buried her face in her sister's neck, and only the feel of wet droplets, let Andromeda know she was crying.
She echoed her daughter's words, "It's okay, you're safe, Bella, you're safe now."
Kingsley smiled at her over Bella's shoulder and mouthed the words, "Thank you."
Andromeda mouthed back, "You crazy fucker."
He grinned, his smile dazzling and ruining his stoic demeanour as only love could.
Andromeda decided he was doomed, but feeling her sister crying in her arms, she felt hope, hope that there was someone there who could be loved and love in turn.
Harry stopped trying to make eye contact with the beautiful Ms. Black. After reviewing on his actions, later on, he felt a bit bad about how harsh he had been. But he would not apologize. He had been used by everyone who had ever seemed to think well of him, well, except for Hermione and Sirius. But the others…
Fame was not all it was cracked up to be. Even Ginny…
Hell, maybe he had been fooling himself, maybe he had always been the Boy-Who-Lived to her. He would never forget the words she had thrown in his face when he had said he was taking Teddy and leaving the wizarding world.
She hadn't understood that his son had become the most important thing in the world to him. Nor had she understood what finding Andromeda's lifeless body had done to him.
You've seen bodies before, and what was she to you? She was Bellatrix Lestrange's sister.
Andromeda had been Harry's second chance, his start to independence and having a future and a family beyond the war he had been born to. She had needed him as much as Teddy had. And that need, not born of fear but kinship, had been everything to him, everything.
Finding her gone, finding her dead when he let himself believe that the dying seasons were over, had broken something vital inside of him.
He had failed her, and it was something he would never forgive himself for.
She had been so afraid, he should have done more, asked more questions, gone after the Dark Lord who had murdered her and his parents. She had come to him, married him, trusted him to take care of her, even when she had her brother who would have welcomed her with open arms.
Naomi and he should have had long and happy future together.
Harry shook himself, and if wasn't for Teddy asleep in the bed he would have punched something.
The damn memories, the memories that were and weren't his slipped in, overwriting his past in ways he could not have foreseen.
Henry had been a librarian, with no friends, and an inventor of spells.
Harry had been a child soldier, smouched of his friend's bookish ways, and had only dabbled inventing spells.
They seemed to have the same power level, the same looks, the same toxic relationship with their foster families. But they weren't the same person. And yet, Harry remembered reading books he had never touched before, and he missed Hermione hardly at all. As for his spell work…
He had been good at wandless magic before time travelling. Now? Now, he didn't even know when he was using magic, he just did.
Dumbledore was starting to take closer notice of him, all the other professors were really.
He sighed and went back to grading papers. Whatever or whoever was doing this to him, would find him eventually, it always did.
He looked at his small son, spread eagle in the center of the bed under a mass of blankets. Harry would let the entire world burn before he let it fall on Teddy.
This brought his thoughts back to Narcissa, the taste and feel of her lips on his. Between the two, he would always choose Teddy. If she approached him again, he needed to make that clear. He wouldn't risk bringing someone into Teddy's life who didn't want to be a part of both their lives. Harry couldn't afford to give his heart to someone who didn't plan on staying.
He just didn't have enough heart left to be broken again.
"What do you mean, you went to go see Andromeda?" Narcissa asked, pissed, but probably not for the reasons Bella thought.
"I went to go see Andromeda, Kingsley insisted."
"Shacklebolt? What does he have to do with anything?"
"We are getting married."
"You're what?" Narcissa asked, her voice sharp.
Bella sighed, "Kingsley and I are getting married." She flashed her ring, which Narcissa kicked herself for missing.
"And you told Andromeda before you told me," she stated coldly.
Bella nodded warily.
"Does Father know? I know you weren't foolish enough to tell Mother."
"They both know I'm getting married to Kingsley, neither knows that I went to see Andromeda and Nymphadora."
Nymphadora. Narcissa felt a flash of guilt spark through her. How awful was it that she had never even met her own niece?
"How did you and Kingsley even get back together?"
"The day I went to the Aurors about the Dark Lord," she began before stating bluntly, "I fucked him in his office."
Narcissa felt as if some cosmic joke had just played on her. Bella finds true love and she, Narcissa, gets turned down the first time she tries giving herself away. She took in a sharp breath, hadn't she just been wishing that Andromeda was back in her life a few days ago? Feeling reckless, she marched out of her apartment at Hogwarts.
Bella skipped to catch up, her dark hair flowing behind her. Bella was nuts, but she was beautiful, and Shacklebolt was one of the only wizards she knew of strong enough to take care of her.
Rell probably could have handled her too. For a moment she saw red at the very idea of Bella and Rell. He was hers, and though she had no right to feel that possessive, she had never wanted anything as much as she wanted to be a part of his life.
He had taken one shot at her heart and aimed true. Maybe she was being young and foolish, but she had never met anyone like him. Never met a man who valued family the way she did.
She knew of no other man who would respond to her wish to become a housewife and say not 'I support that' but 'I want that too.'
She was wealthy enough for the both of them if he wanted to give up teaching, though by all accounts he was a brilliant teacher. But she- She was fantasising, and she had blown her chance with Rell.
Taking Bella's hand she began to drag her from the room.
"Cissy? Where are we going?"
"Andromeda, if you can go see her, so can I. And what Mother doesn't know won't hurt us."
In a handful of minutes, Bella apparated them to Andromeda's home. Fuelled by a cold fury she struck the door harder than she needed to.
But when Andromeda opened the door, she froze, it had been so long, even longer since all three of them had been together. Narcissa launched herself into her arms, and Andromeda held her tight.
Narcissa didn't cry but her heart felt like it was in a vice.
Bella came up behind her, and they hugged like used to when they had been so young. So young that they hadn't known a world outside the bubble their family had existed in.
Lily had never liked a professor as much as she liked Professor Rell. He could be a little crazy sometimes, like dropping boulders on their head, teaching first years to cast seventh years spells, or having James Fricken Potter teach them a spell.
James, to his credit, had managed a decent presentation though the Slytherin side, and she herself, was glad when Professor Rell furthered the explanation. It wasn't a completely humiliating experience, nothing anyone would gossip about. Quite the opposite, James Potter had done something spectacularly unremarkable.
But today, Lily finally got the gumption up to ask him her questions after class.
Of course, as she waiting for the class to file out, Sev giving her a small smile as he left, Hagrid, the half-giant came in with Teddy's son skipping at his side, chatting animatedly.
It seemed to be that only with Hagrid did the boy acted his age. All her mom's friends' babies were much -louder than Teddy.
Professor Rell greeted his son with a hug and the half-giant with an open and brilliant smile.
In that instant, he reminded Lily unnervingly of James Potter, so much so that she almost disliked him a bit for it.
But that was just her survival instinct kicking in, anything Potter was meant to be avoided.
"Ms. Evans," the professor called as Hagrid waved goodbye, ruffling the little boy's hair before he left.
"Ah, hi, professor, I was, I had some questions," she got out, wondering why Teddy always sat out of their class. According to the seventh years Teddy sat through their classes even when the professor had them practising stunners.
He apparently was a joy to have in class. The girls who weren't enchanted by the handsome and powerful professor, were won over by the little boy. Even the boys in the class wouldn't deny how cute Teddy Peverell was, and as she watched him grab a picture book, Lily found herself asking, "Can he really read?"
Professor Rell smiled, "Some of the books I read on repeat he remembers, but those books are a little high level for a three year old."
"I can read!" Teddy protested.
He smiled at his son but didn't argue with him.
Lily smiled too and then she asked the question she wanted to ask since the first class, "Is DADA just like a charms class, but you know for defence."
Professor Rell smiled and sat back on his desk, "Yes and no."
She cocked her head, "How do you mean yes and how no?"
"Well, certainly, many of DADA spells are charms, shield charms, Patronus charm, and disarming charms. However, hexes, counter-curses, and curses, are, at least in part, the Dark Arts."
Her eyes went wide, "But-"
He shook his heads, "There is a reason this class is titled Defense Against the Dark Arts, rather than just defense class. Most DADA spells are simply standards Dark Art spells, spells with predictable outcomes, spells whose greatest function is defence or undoing a Dark Arts spell. But Ms. Evans, what I want you to keep in mind is that a spell, any spell, should be judged on its means, its intention, and its use. All magic can be dangerous, accidents do happen."
"But the Dark Arts are-"
"In their majority intended to do harm at a great cost, but not all."
"But-"
He smiled, "What is the stinging jinx intended to do?"
"Cause pain, but that's nothing like the unforgivable!"
He nodded, "Ms. Evans, I believe you have the correct judgement to answer you own questions about what is and isn't dark arts and under what circumstances."
She pressed her lips together but couldn't argue, so she asked another question, "Does it help to know what kind of spell each DADA spell is?"
"Of course, why do you think I assign homework?"
She blushed, "Right, um, thanks. Bye Professor Rell, bye Teddy."
"Have a good afternoon, Ms. Evans," echoed by Teddy's, "Bye Evanses!"
She left feeling as if she had just had her questions answered with questions, and the strangest sense that she knew Professor Rell from before Hogwarts.
"Spill," Andromeda ordered after dinner.
Nymphadora and Bellatrix were chatting animatedly in the living room, Ted Tonks smiling at them both as he read the Healer's Journal in a plush chair.
Narcissa looked up from where she was putting away the dishes, having to do it without magic as she didn't know yet where the correct places for the dishes were. She sighed, "How do you always know? It's been years."
"You aren't that hard to read if you know what to look for. So what is wrong?"
Narcissa sighed again, "I screwed up, with a wizard."
Andromeda made a face, "Malfoy wasn't good enough for you. Pretty yes, but good? He was completely undeserving."
"No, not Malfoy, Rell, Henry Peverell. He is the DADA professor at Hogwarts."
Andromeda turned off the water and turned to lean against the counter, "And why isn't this boy eating out of your hands?"
Narcissa flushed, "Man, not boy. He, he has son, Nymphadora's age actually."
Andromeda's eyebrows shot up, "Teddy, right? He's a metamorphmagus too."
She raised her pale brows in response, "How-?"
"Aside from making it into the Prophet, Bella mentioned Peverell saving her. So I'm assuming he's a wizard worth his wand?"
Narcissa let out a long breath, "And then some. Dromeda, he's everything- everything I ever told myself I wanted."
"Soo?" Andromeda drawled, "What did you do?"
"I -er, I," she took in a steadying breath, "I offered him sex and he all but threw me out."
Andromeda was silent for a long moment.
And Narcissa snapped, "Bella tried that and she's getting married."
"Kingsley," Andromeda said, her voice gentle, "doesn't have a son. Was Peverell married?"
She nodded, "He's a widower. His wife was Naomi Lupin."
"Do you want a one night stand with him, or a fling for the season?"
"No!" she exclaimed, then lowered her voice, "no, I want to try for something lasting."
"Then try, ask him out on a date. Go out with him, if you like his son, take the boy with you. Children aren't always great for romance, but if he turned you down for a physical relation than perhaps that's not the kind romance he wants, not immediately anyway. You need to get to know him, and his son, and they need to get to know you."
"I don't just want to be friends."
"No, but if you want something lasting, you will have to base your relationship on more than mutual attraction."
"How do you know it is mutual?"
Andromeda gave her a look, "Unless he's gay, it is mutual. And if it wasn't mutual you wouldn't be interested. You like being admired, can you honestly tell me he hasn't admired you? Shown you with a glance that he sees you?"
Narcissa blushed. Rell had shown her that with his lips, with the reverent way he put his hands on her, however… "He turned me down."
"He has a son, Narcissa. Being protective of his son's well being, his emotional wellness, is not something you fault him on."
Narcissa rubbed her cheek, hating the heat she found there, "I messed up."
Andromeda took her hands in hers, "If it was meant to be then you haven't messed up. The very act of reaching out to him again shows him that you care, that you want to try."
She hugged her older sister for a second time that evening, "I missed you, so very much."
Andromeda held her back, "I missed you too, more than you will ever know."
Narcissa doubted that, unlike Andromeda, Narcissa and Bella needed her, needed their Northern Star to guide them.