Robbin's POV
Breakfast with the Nightwalkers is very...uncomfortable to say the least. After they arrived at the Westerlie kingdom yesterday, my family has gone out of our way to make sure they enjoy their stay here. After all, we'll all be family soon.
I barely looked up from my meal to engage in the political conversation my brother and Gus were having. I couldn't bring myself to, especially with Xander staring at me from across the table. His sight and touch were enough to make me uneasy, and not for the reason he thinks.
We both knew that the mark he gave me was deflecting any harsh words, the be spoken at least. But the ones that stayed in my mind would surely land me in another cooling cell.
Dammit, I can't take it anymore. This is my home. My kingdom. How can I let myself be intimidated by an outsider? It sends all the wrong messages of me as a ruler.
I lift my head to tell him to fuck off, but once our eyes connected, all I could do was stare. The way his eyes burned into mine, it was unexplainable. The way it made my body feel...it was the same as yesterday. His presence, his touch, it affects me.
"Did you want me to do it again?"
His question suddenly rang through my mind. I didn't know the answer to that, and I still don't. I've never experienced anything intimate before. But the way he touched me, along with the lustful look in his eyes...Maybe it was affecting me so much because it was my first time. Maybe.
I shook off the thoughts and brought my head back down. I need to get over this. I don't like the person I've turned into. The old me wouldn't back down from someone, mate, or not.
I inwardly agree with myself. The old me wouldn't and neither will the current me. I suck in a calming breath and raise my head once more, but don't look at him. Instead, I keep eating. At least now I don't look like a coward in my own home.
"Robbie?"
My thoughts paused and my gaze turned to Phineas who was trying to get my attention.
"What did you say, Fin?"
He gave me a playful eye roll at the nickname. Fin was his nickname as a child, but he made us stop calling him that when his 'lady friends' came to visit him.
"I was just wondering what your plans were once you guys return to the Northerner kingdom."
I looked back at Xander. Honestly, I didn't know what the plan was. I understood the luna situation. Every pack needs one, but to be their queen? That was never the role I was meant to play in life. It was never one that I wanted.
Fortunately, Xander managed to answer before me.
"At the moment, her coronation is being planned back home," he doesn't even look up from his plate as he spoke. At least he's not staring at me. "The date is set one month after we return home, but you will go through some training."
"Training? For what exactly?"
"Everything. You don't know the responsibilities of being a luna, and don't get me started on ruling a kingdom."
"Are you serious? The luna role, I understand, but I am a princess, you know. What makes you think I'm incompetent?"
"A princess does not rule a country." His gaze finally returns to me. "You are to be the queen. And besides, you've been imprisoned for a century, remember?"
"I don't need a refresher course."
"It's not up for discussion."
Breakfast ended on that note, and I couldn't be happier. I get up and head for the dragon pit. Maybe the Westerlie wind would help me think, and considering everything that's happened, I going to be deep in my thoughts.
But I guess it'll happen later because when I tried to leave the dining hall, Xander grabbed my arm and pulled me back to him.
"What do you want now?"
"We need to discuss something."
"What? Did you not say enough yesterday? Or are you going to lick me again?"
A devilish smirk slides onto his face. "Well by the way you reacted, it seems you'd only want me to do it again."
Traitorous body. I couldn't help the way my body felt under his touch, the stroke of his tongue made me silently begging for more. But the worst part is I wasn't sure what caused that reaction. Was it what I wanted or the mark's doing?
I was hoping to sort out my thoughts with a long, long fly with Phoebion, but I guess it'll be now.
"Xander, my involuntary bodily reaction has nothing to do with this. Now, tell me what you want."
His smirk turns into a glare.
"Please, Robbin."
He said my name. That might've been the first time I heard him say it. I closed my eyes for a split second. I don't know how to handle romantic partners. But that shouldn't be a problem, I suppose. He's my mate. Even though I know what happens during the mating process, I won't allow him to become intimate with me.
"This is that last time, Xander." I turn and lead him to the courtyard since it was in the direction of the dragon pit. What could he want this time? I can only pray to the gods this conversation doesn't end with another lick to the neck. I'm not sure I can control myself if I let it happen again.
We reach the courtyard and I turn to the guards in the area, waving them away. When I faced Xander, his eyes instantly connected to mine, and I felt myself growing self-aware.
No. I told myself. "Say what you want." I maintained a calm voice but irritated composure.
He takes steady strides towards me, but I don't move. He'll no longer intimidate me in my kingdom.
"That. that's what I need to talk to you about."
"What?"
"Your attitude. Speak to however you like in private, but while we're in public, be it here or in the Northerner kingdom, you'll have to speak to me with respect."
There was a harshness in his voice, the kind an alpha would use to command his pack members. Was that what I was to him? I may not approve of this bond, but he won't treat his mate like this.
"How dare you speak to me with that tone! I am not one of your mutts to boss around. You know well who I am now. It's not me who needs to learn to respect, it's you."
My voice came out just as harsh as his, only there was more emotion in mine. Whenever Xander speaks, it's always in an unattached tone, with no way to figure out what he's feeling.
"I am your Alpha first, and you'll show me respect. So get rid of your attitude and submit." He stretched the last word to get his point across.
"Have you forgotten our conversation back in the Northerner kingdom? I can't submit to you. It's not in my nature. And even if I could, I wouldn't. I'm not as submissive as your other women."
I couldn't help the hate that laced in my voice. But the worst part was that the anger wasn't directed towards him. It was for sage. But why? I never cared for his affairs with her or any other women for that matter.
"Sage was just a distraction. We only used her for sex."
How could he say something so vulgar? "That's disgusting. How can you use someone so easily?"
"We used each other. It was just sex, Robbin. That's all she was to me."
"Then you can keep fucking her when we get back home. Bond or no bond, I'll never let you touch me again. You disgust me. I should just reject you and accept the war that's to come. Anything would be better than a life with you."
If the look on his face wasn't clear enough, I'd say he was pretty mad. That's an understatement. I could've sworn there was steam seeping through his ears.
"You will do no such thing." he pushed the words through his teeth. Xander moved closer to me and grabbed both of my arms. The mark is proof enough. You will never belong to anyone but me."
"The mark is nothing but physical proof. An emotional one is needed for the mating process to be completed. And as of now and for the foreseeable future, the only emotion I'll ever feel for you is hate." And with that, I left. I couldn't stand being there with him anymore.
Finally. I managed to shut him up. But was it the right thing to do? The entire time I yelled at him, my body ached. The mating mark allows me to feel Xander's pain. He is an alpha, however. He could've manipulated his emotions, but why? What would he get out of it?
Maybe my words truly did hurt him. But I don't care. He took everything from me. My home, my family...my freedom, the one I've waited a century for. And he knew that! He knew everything I was leaving behind, all so I can rule a country with him.
I start making my way out of the courtyard, but couldn't bring myself to leave. The pain continued to travel through my body and found its way to my head, causing a familiar throbbing pain. I let out a sigh and turned back to Xander.
He didn't move at all. The only noticeable change from him was the expression on his face. He was...sad?
I sighed and walked back towards him. Rejection for dragons isn't a thing we care of. There is no love lost. Dragons only mate. There are no emotions involved. But for werewolves, it rips them apart from the inside. Maybe that's why I didn't care. I do carry dragon blood, after all.
"Xander I'm not going to reject you. War isn't what I or anyone wants."
"I was never going to accept it. You can have whatever thoughts you want about me. It isn't going to change anything." His face returned to its cold and distant state.
"I'm trying to apologize to you. Xander, dragons don't care about mating, and I forgot how much werewolves do."
"Don't flatter yourself. If I had a choice, you'd be the last as my mate." His eyes narrowed as he spoke down on me. "I only need you to say because we need a Luna and queen, so don't go thinking it's because I want you."
"Good, because the feeling is mutual."
There were still things to be discussed, but they can wait for another day. Xander spared me one more cold glance and walked past me, but it was my turn to stop him.
I grabbed his hand and moved so I was facing him. "Come with me."
"No." It was a single word but was scorched with hate.
"Please. You need to see something."
When he didn't reject my request again, I led him out of the courtyard and into the dragon pit. I turned to see his face and it was as I imagined. Scared.
Who wouldn't be? There were at least 20 full grown dragons resting in the field. He stopped in his tracks, granting another look from me.
"What's wrong?"
"Why did you bring me here?"
"I want you to meet someone." I almost had to drag him through the pit while I searched for Phoebion.
Once we were a few yards away from her, she sensed my presence and awoke from her nap.
Phoebion noticed Xander standing next to me and let out a loud growl. I assume she sensed the disapproval I had for him and saw him as a threat.
"Woah girl. It's okay." I patted her nose and tried to soothe her. "He's a friend."
She looked at him and moved her face towards him.
"She's not going to eat me, is she?"
"Only if I want her to. She wants you to touch her nose."
Xander looks at me with a worried expression, then back at phoebion. He steadily stretched out his hand and placed it on her nose. Phoebion let out a few loud breaths, her eyes narrowing at him. After a few moments, she finally pressed against his hand, acknowledging his being.
I removed his hand and gave Phoebion a nod to lower her wing. It was time Xander knew what I meant when I said dragons and werewolves are different.
"What are you doing? I'm not getting on that thing."
I tried dragging him toward her wing but he didn't budge. " please, Xander. You need to see something." I gave him a soft look, perhaps the softest one I've ever given him. But in all honesty, my facial expressions around him consisted of hard glances hate and a dash of vengeance.
Xander looked at me once more, then proceeded to climb up the lowered wing and settled at the base her neck. I followed after and sat in front of him. After attaching the harness around our waists, I commanded Phoebion to take off.
She lets out a roar and I felt Xander circle his arms around my waist. Phoebion flapped her wings and took off into the sky. We made it a few hundred feet in the air before Xander's chest was moving quickly against my back.
I turned my head as saw him hyperventilating. "Xander, you need to calm down," I yelled through the forceful winds.
Once I got Phoebion to steady herself and glide through the sky, I wrapped one hand around one of his that was holding me and leaned back into him. I knew that physical touch can help your mate calm down when in a fearful state.
It seems to be working because I felt the pulse on his wrist and the hyperventilating began to slow down. I turned my head and saw his eyes were closed.
"Open your eyes, Xander. You need to see this."
Slowly, his eyes began to open and widen at the sight. I smiled at his reaction. seeing the world from this point of view can be very breathtaking.
His chin rested on my shoulder and pulled me closer to him, but in a more gentle way. After he was a bit more comfortable, I removed both of his hands.
"Wait, don't." his voice came out almost shaky. I couldn't help but chuckle. I've never seen him so...vulnerable.
I gripped both of his hands tightly and stretched them out to our sides. He didn't protest, but I could sense the fear in him. I needed him to trust me on this. Xander needs to know what it feels like to be a dragon.
We flew in silence for a while as I guided Phoebion to the Drakon Bay. Once I found a spot by the sea, I landed Phoebion and unhooked our harness. We got off and walked through the field that led to the bay.
"What did you think?" I couldn't help but ask.
"It was, I don't know what to say. I've never felt anything like that."
"Did you not enjoy it?"
"I think I did," He said moving closer to me. "It felt like I was flying. It felt," he pause so I decided to finish for him.
"Like you're free."
A smile found it's way on my face and contagiously spread to his.
"I'm glad you feel this way. Now, do you understand?"
"Understand what?" his gaze turned to the bay of water that was in front of us.
"What it's like to be a dragon. Loong before the Drakon dynasty, some people carried dragon blood but misused their power. They forced dragons to burn cities to the ground. They chained them up and abused them. Over time, they grew smaller in captivity. It wasn't until my ancestors destroyed their way of life and gave dragons a new purpose. Not to destroy, but to serve under good pretenses. We don't enslave or abuse their power. Yet, a dragon is still a dragon. They can't submit to us, only understand our way of life."
Xander didn't speak, but he did show a new emotion on his face, one that I couldn't read. With his silence, I took that moment to speak again.
"Chaining a dragon is the worst thing you can do. It rids us of the one thing we crave the most, our freedom. To fly in the sky is what we live for."
"I'm so sorry, Robbin. You didn't deserve what I did you." the unreadable emotion turned to one of sadness and regret. Good. He should feel guilty for what he did.
"It took a piece of me when you chained me up, especially after my imprisonment. If we're going to rule a country together, you can never do that again. Promise me, Xander."
Xander looked at me almost somberly. "I promise."
"Good. now we can..we can..we..-"I couldn't stop my body from hitting the ground. My eyes felt too heavy to open and my senses dulled to the point where only numbness covered my body.
What's happening to me?