Chapter 15. Lee Hyerin (3)
Splash! Splash!
Lee Hyerin splashed cold water on her face. The cold sensation cooled her down.
She looked in the mirror and slapped her cheeks several times.
'What am I doing?'
Lee Hyerin recalled her singing from earlier.
The distorted face of the sound engineer was enough to tell her that her singing was the worst.
She berated herself for that.
She was just too nervous during the recording. She didn't show it much on her face, but she was really nervous and scared.
She was scared of failing.
It was the same feeling she had felt when she was recording her first song with the other members of Apple mint.
The only difference was that she has too much to lose this time.
She doesn't know what would happen to her daughter if she failed in making a comeback.
That's just added more pressure to her.
Because of all that, she was not able to sing the song with emotions. Her notes and resonance also fell gradually.
In the end, she was just reading out lyrics.
"Get yourself together. You can do it!!"
Lee Hyerin held her head with both of her hands and muttered that like she was reciting a mantra.
She recalled the face of her daughter who was still waiting for her to return home.
That gave her a little strength and she vowed to succeed for her, but her nervousness was still there.
"Ahh, why am I like this?"
Lee Hyerin splashed her face with cold water again and tried to shake off her nervousness.
She left the bathroom after that, but as she got close to the recording studio, she saw someone standing there.
It was Lee Hyun.
"Why are you standing here?"
Lee Hyun looked towards Lee Hyerin when she asked that.
From her slight damp top and glowing face, he was able to perceive that she had splashed water on her face, probably to calm down.
"I wanted to ask something?"
"Ask something?"
Lee Hyerin tilted her head as she wondered what he wanted to talk about, but his next words shocked her.
"Miss Hyerin. Why are you so nervous?"
"I-I am not nervous."
She said, trying to act calm, but the surprise on her face gave her away.
She thought that she had managed to hide her nervousness, but it looks like she was wrong.
"I don't know what you are talking about."
Still, she tried to be nonchalant about it and started walking past Lee Hyun.
But then, at that moment, she heard Lee Hyun's voice.
"If you are not nervous, then why are you making mistakes like a newbie singer? You are not even able to hold a single note."
Her steps came to a halt.
Lee Hyun already knew everything. So, there was no point in acting. Maybe, it was because of that, but her eyes suddenly got teary.
Lee Hyerin quickly lowered her head to hide away the tears, but he was able to hear the sobbing noises.
'It's good that there's no one here.'
He quickly looked around and took a sigh of relief. It would be trouble if someone saw them like this.
Then, he looked at Let Hyerin who had her head lowered. She was trying to clean her tears using her hands.
'She was in more pressure than I had thought.'
Lee Hyun thought and frowned a little.
He didn't know how to deal with this situation. If she was just nervous, then he can just say some encouraging words to her.
But that probably won't work here.
That's why, he quickly pulled Lee Hyerin to a lounge area nearby.
He sat her down and quickly bought a can of coffee from the vending machine. Then, he pushed it to her and said.
"Here, drink it."
"I, I'm fine. I r-really don't need this."
Lee Hyerin said as and raised her head slightly, but her eyes were already reddened and she was sniffling too.
"I already bought it. So, just drink it."
He pushed the can of coffee in her hand and sat down next to her.
As he didn't know what to do in this situation, he just sat there and observed Lee Hyerin from the corner of his eye.
After a second, she opened the can of coffee and started to gulp it down. Maybe because it was bitter, she stuck out her tongue in agony.
"The coffee is bitter. I don't like it."
"Then, should I get you some other drink?"
"No, it's fine."
Lee Hyerin said as she lowered her head. It looked like she had calmed down a little, but her eyes were still red.
'What should I say?'
He pondered but nothing was coming in his brain.
He thought that he could deal with any situation as he got older, but he realised that it was not true.
"I'm actually very scared."
"Ah?"
Suddenly, Lee Hyerin opened her mouth. He was surprised for a second, but he quickly closed his mouth.
Lee Hyerin continued to speak.
"When I got married, I never thought I would return to the entertainment industry. I wished for a happy life with my family and I even thought I was living one, but in the end, it was all a illusion…"
Her tears that had stopped midway again started to flow.
"After I got a divorce, I wondered what I should do. At that time, my daughter told me to become a singer. It was weird, but my daughter was always infatuated with idols and singers. Maybe, because of that, she wanted her mom to become one too..."
Her voice began shaking and the sniffling sounds grew louder. Lee Hyun passed her a tissue and she quickly patted away her tears.
Then, she continued.
"I also thought that I could do it. My daughter was supporting me and I didn't want to disappoint her. Luckily, I got a chance to make a comeback. I practiced hard everyday and even got a song I wanted to sing but…"
"But?"
"... What if I failed my comeback?"
Lee Hyerin took a deep breath before opening her mouth again.
"I myself know that making a comeback when you are over 30 is just nonsense. People want to see those young idols and I'm just an 'aunty'. I can't compete against them."
"Why are you thinking like that? Maybe, your comeback would be successful and you will even get famous…"
"That won't happen!"
Lee Hyun tried to console her, but she cut him off in the middle.
It looked like she immediately regretted her actions as she lowered her head again, and started crying.
In between her crying noises, her words flowed out.
"I-I disappointed my group members once in the past. J-just because of me, they were not able to achieve what they wanted. This time, I would surely disappoint… my daughter."
Lee Hyun could understand her well.
She disappointed the other members of Apple mint in the past. When they were on the peak of their career, she got pregnant.
Maybe, she was still blaming herself for that.
The guilt of disappointing her group was really heavy. She didn't want to disappoint anyone else again, especially her daughter.
That all just added more pressure to her.
'She's pitiful.'
Lee Hyun felt that Lee Hyerin was really pitiful.
She was just a mother who wanted to succeed for her daughter, but she was also scared that she would fail.
He can't help, but pity her.
He wondered what he should say here and after a while, Lee Hyun again opened his mouth.