When I exited the lobby I had all but broke my neck running to my damn car, I couldn't even remember where I had parked. If it wasn't for my windshield wipers coming on at high speed I still wouldn't have noticed it. They screeched across the dry ass window because for some reason that raggedy ass car I had paid 3000 for was rigged to where if u blew the horn the wipers would come on.
Mr. Shonda had done me the biggest favor of my life all because the jail was over capacitated and a storm was forming in another parish, they had needed as much room as possible. Of all the shit I had done the bitch had the nerve to tell me I had a warrant from Arlington for absconding a mental facility, and since I was under the Mental Health Act, the police were supposed to detain me until they were contacted. Also the driver of the van Twan had driven to get me in had a warrant for his arrest, Lucito Hernandez. I could have kissed that confused bitch. I pictured her with a strap on hanging and lipstick on her lips. I thanked her genuinely and she said, "Hazel, don't forget I did u a favor. U know what time I get off." I ran like hell and got the fuck out of Louisiana.
She was trippin.
My health was not up to par, of course I eventually abandoned all meds. I was on a mission and needed what I thought was a clear head. I had no self discipline when off of the psych pills and would react on every notion. If the thought had said drive into a brick wall, I would definitely intend to do so on impulse. I hadn't had a seizure so I tried to remain stress free, and it was impossible, but what had she meant Twan wasn't safe? I worried constantly and Nikki would talk, I could not absorb her words, I was focused on my babies, even Ryella, and their father. I loved him so much and I wished I had never met him, I suffered and could not think rationally. I knew I needed the meds. I just had to talk to Twan so I created another facebook account. He didn't accept friend requests from unfamiliar people and I did not remember his phone number. The messages I left only went to his other inbox. I was dying inside, he needed to at least know about the babies. One day I went to his page and his account had been deactivated, or he had me blocked. I wanted to go on a rampage. I needed to stay calm, besides Nikki was having company, I did not want to disrespect her home with an episode but I would soon explode. I sat down and rolled a blunt. How could I lose the people I loved? All at once! Who had cursed me? I needed someone, anyone! I smoked and walked to my car, I was going to find Redd, back in Louisiana. I just needed him to hold me, I knew he was sorry. We could start over! If I was making a mistake I prayed God would stop me in my tracks. I was being punished for betraying him, how could I expect loyalty if I wasn't solid? I had gotten everything I deserved I concluded.
I put my foot on the brake, my car in reverse and began to back out of the driveway, my phone rang and then I heard the crash. A car had run into another vehicle head on as I prepared to back out. I blew the horn for Nikki to come out but the wipers just came on. A bitch jumped from behind the airbag with a helmet on and the smallest gun I had ever seen, and walked to the Tahoe she had collided with. "Yea bitch ass nigga, u over here in the hood, u need yo dick sucked huh? I followed yo dumb ass! U wanted her to wear the red MuMu? Well Ima suck ya dick today, get the fuck out."
The nigga was unresponsive. "Gabe, don't play with me, open the muthafuckin door! GABE!"
I was ducked down but I heard Nikki screaming, just when u think u about to lose it here comes another bitch.
Nikki ran outside in a red MuMu, "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!?"
"Oh, that's the ugly bitch?"
Both front ends were smashed and the passenger door of the truck opened as the bitch walked to her trunk and pulled out an iron bat. Nikki ran inside, "Gone on Mena, Ima call the police!"
"How the fuck u know my name!"
She reached for the door Nikki had quickly locked it. The nigga from the passenger side was dialing 911, she left the door, got in her car and drove sideways down the street. Dude gave them her plates, "I can't believe this bitch done hit my truck !"he said, "Gabe u payin for this shit!"
"She gone?"
"NIGGA! GET THE FUCK OUT MY TRUCK!"
Nikki was peeking out of the raggedy blinds.
I slowly got out, and hadn't known how I would get out of the driveway. Mahogany, Nikki's cat came running across the street, she opened the door to let her in and quickly closed it back with her scary ass. "Bro! I don't know why she trippin!"
Shit, I did.
"Call the tow truck, I'll pay for everything," the nigga said. "Don't tell Nikki this yo truck fool. Ion want no child support!"
The games nigga's played.
Christy had called simultaneous to the wreck, I could not call back of course. I went inside after waiting on Nikki to unlock 50/11 locks. We needed to talk. The niggas soon knocked, she had taken off the Mumu. "Im sorry u had to see that Boo," the driver said, unharmed and kissed Nikki. The homeboy looked so familiar, I hadn't known where I had known him from. I needed to know, everybody was suspect for whatever reason. I waited for Christy to call back, I would tell her I was coming to see her. I needed to know how to add minutes and couldn't talk until I had. I hoped she could call back. The police came, and then the tow truck. The nigga on the passenger side needed a ride and said nobody was coming that far to get him, he offered to pay me to take him home, I hesitated but agreed. I needed to go to the gas station first. He handed me 25 dollars, I counted out more to fill up as I walked inside Quik Trip. With my head down I ran into someone as they were coming out, it was TOBIAS? I hadn't known how to react, he squeezed my shoulder and snatched me to the side questioning me like we were fucking. He was squeezing the wrong shoulder. "Damn, U just don't care?" He was asking. How had he figured I didn't care? He had been in line to pay for his gas and had turned around to see what pump he was on and saw me getting out of the car on pump 14, also saw the nigga, Meek getting out of the passenger side to pump the gas for me. Why was he even at that gas station?
"U can't leave three kids on my fucking brother! Those babies need their mama, u are childish as fuck!" Was he scolding me?
"Everything good?" Meek asked as he approached Tobias reaching toward his waist. Who was that nigga?
I tried to make light of the situation, but three babies?
"I don't have his number!"
"Bullshit, U laid up with this nigga? Say potna, she got three babies she don't take care of, this ain't what u want!"
"And u were going to kill Lamont!"
"Bitch what the fuck u talkin about!"
"Ima let u two have it, I'll catch a ride. Let me get that quarter back."
I was about to hand him the money. "Nigga she ain't gotta give u shit!"
Tobias was really outta line, "U out here fuckin these niggas and they want the money back? Christy said u was a low class hoe." I gave Meek the 25 dollars.
WAIT WHAT?
I just turned around and went to my car and drove away. I went back to Nikki's house, and beat on the door. She soon came from the bedroom half naked and let me in. "That was quick," she said. I was thinking the same thing. I even considered joining them but she just wasn't what it do. I sat on the couch and thought shit could not get any worse, how the fuck had Twan had the twins? Tobias had said babies. I was losing it. I knew I could find out where Tobias lived again, easily and drive there. I had just been too stubborn, but when Ryella pushed me away I snapped. I had initially been willing to forgive Twan and Ryella was the reason I left. I had cried for her day in and day out but she pushed me away? Hadn't she known the consequences? My phone soon rang and Christy had called back, I watched the caller ID. It rang and rang and then finally I answered. I accepted a 60 second call. I didn't know if I could even trust that bitch, I thought back to our first encounter she had said she needed me to work for her but hadn't even worked since Tobias. I only fucked with her to begin with because of her promises. Something wasn't right about that bitch, at all.
She said she would call back and to follow the prompts. I had talked to Redd before while incarcerated but he always had minutes on the phone he would leave at home, where he was always arrested. As a matter of fact where was it?
She soon called back and I told her of my recent encounter with Tobias. She said he was mad, she had stopped calling home. Also she said he wasn't who he appeared to be. All I could think about was what Tobias had said she said about me, so I asked the bitch. She admitted it but said she used me as an example of being an upgrade and she was proud of her own influence and accomplishments. Unh Hunh
I told her I would soon return, she had court the next day June 25th. She prayed they would reduce her bond, but hadn't counted on it. I was so confused and it seemed like trouble came from all angles.
Nikki came from her room, sat in the broken recliner and lit a Newport, as the smell invaded my nose, I reached for her pack and ended the call with Christy. What I could send to her was limited but I promised I would send the shit she asked for if she didn't get out. The impression Tobias had of me hurt me deep, I showered and cried. That wasn't true about me! I wanted to hate the day I was born, and I wanted to kill everyone responsible. Nikki could tell I wasn't in the mood to talk and had asked what had happened with Meek, I just told her it was a long story and he had caught a ride, I assumed. It was a lot she hadn't known about me and I hadn't wanted her to know. All she needed to know was I loved my children.
I got dressed and drove toward Carrollton, a for sale sign was in Tobias' yard when I arrived. I didn't care if Twan's bitch was inside, I squeezed the thumb latch and entered the home. It was filthy. Noone was downstairs and Tobias' car was gone. I could hear Ryella's gibberish upstairs but no one else. I climbed the stairs and pushed open the door, she sat on the floor throwing milk from her bottle, I reached for her, she tried to give me the bottle. I could see a stack of newborn Pampers and onesies clean and dirty, a crib and a lot of other things in the filthy room that would be for newborns. Where was Twan? I picked Ryella up and walked down the hallway, I heard the shower. I knocked on the door, "Who the fuck is it," he said.
I opened the door ready to stomp a mudhole in whatever bitch he was bathing, I knew that muthafucka. I had had enough of his disrespectful ass!
To my surprise, both of my babies sat on the floor in their carseats, he sat on the toilet naked. They watched him contently.
I looked at them they looked like turtles.
"I'm trying to shape his head." I closed the door to the funky ass bathroom in disbelief and sat against the wall and bawled! Ryella laughed and played in my hair. I grabbed her and held her tight, she fought and screamed. Payback Heffa. I just wanted to know if Twan loved me! I meant, not what he was capable of saying but capable of doing! I was so beat up, inside and out. I had left and I was so sorry! I wanted them back.
"She whoopin' yo ass! Get her for me Calliope," he yelled.
I was not about to play with him, I got my baby, got in my car and left. Now he just had two babies.