Daniya's POV
"I have no idea why you are here with me right now." She said softly, not looking up from her book. I knew why she didn't look up at me, she hated when anyone saw her vulnerable, and I respected that even if hiding her emotions was something I didn't like.
"You know why." I replied equally softly, taking a sip of my coffee and finding that it was indeed a bit more bearable than before.
It was as if both of us had come to an unspoken agreement of not letting our voice pierce this fragile little bubble we had created.
"I wish you'd stayed back there. You gave up looking for your internships for me." She got silent but I could read the unspoken words between us-
'I don't like that I am the reason that you stopped, I don't like that I am being a burden for you.'
Putting down my cup of coffee I turned towards her, closing her book and forcing her to look at me "Sometimes, I really ask myself why I befriended a dumb idiot like you"
Her thick dark eyebrows were scrunched in a confused frown which only worked to reinforce what I was saying, but I decided to ignore it and focus on working on lightening the heaviness that had settled around us.
Rummaging I'm the pockets of my favourite floral dress, I fished out my tickets and flashed them in front of her face, making her instinctively move back.
As her dark eyes continued to look at me quizzically, I sat up straighter in my seat "I'm on this seat here, because I bought the tickets for it. Because I wanted a break from knocking at the doors of offices and waiting anxiously for their replies. I'm giving myself a holiday, it's something normal people do when they need a change of scenery."
Before she could interrupt, I hurriedly continued "And honestly Haru it's amazing how delusional you are, did you honestly think I'd leave everything just for you? That's extremely self centred even for you." that made her shut her mouth and look at me with an eyebrow raised "I came here because of selfish reasons."
"It's still foolish, and-" she took a deep breath looking out at the dark sky through the window "and I feel guilty that I'm being an inconvenience to you and auntie Ayesha."
Gauhar was never good at hiding her emotions, they always showed themselves through her eyes, betraying how she felt even if she acted as if nothing bothered her. But now her eyes were blank, as if there was a void that was eating her up from within and that made me feel unsettled.
"Firstly, it was not my idea to accompany you guys. It was mom's and you know how excited she gets about travelling so believe me when I tell you, it's absolutely no inconvenience for her. If anything she is going to enjoy this as an all expenses paid trip to a foreign country."
That brought a smile to her face easing the heaviness in my chest a bit "yeah that's exactly what she'd said."
"Of course, who'd know my mom better than me?" I smiled back at her, trying to make my voice as strong as I could I continued "and secondly" I gritted my teeth, "What kind of friend did you peg me for? How can I leave you alone when I was aware that you needed me?"
"I did not NEED you per say, I mean I could survive on my own pretty-" she began but quickly stopped when she noticed the way I was glaring at her.
I was secretly a bit impressed with myself for accomplishing this fest but I couldn't let it show because I had the role of the stern friend to accomplish.
Turning away she looked down at the book in her lap, I wanted to wrap my around her and comfort her but the arms rests between our seats prevented any movement so I settled my placing my hand on her shoulder "how can you think for even a second that I will allow you to go back to that place alone? Especially when you've been with me unflinchingly when I needed you, even when those kids at school isolated and tortured you for being with me."
"That was nothing Dani, both you and I know that, ignoring those little gits was easier than blinking."
"Would you stop downplaying yourself and listen to me for a second? If you open your mouth again I swear I'm going to gag you with my handkerchief and ensure you listen to what I have to say."
She bit her lip, slowly looking up at me. Narrowing my eyes at her, I crossed my arms across my chest and continued, "I know you Gauhar, I know that you won't take care of yourself, I know you always downplay your sacrifices and I also know that you need someone to ensure that you always look as stylish as possible."
At that she opened her mouth to interrupt but quickly closed it when she saw my hand moving towards my pocket "And since there is nobody who can ensure you take care of all of those things better than me, it's imperative that I be there with you."
That managed to bring some life into her eyes as she snorted incredulously "Dani, both you and I know that my style is impeccable"
I rolled my eyes grinning at her "Well yes, if you're going for the understated casual elegance, it's clearly boring and you pull it off only because you're pretty. But even you would agree that without me you would only stick to those basic blacks whites and browns, you need me for that little pop of colour my love."
She shook her head smiling.
Taking her hand in mine, I looked at her with all the warmth that I held within me "Sometimes you should let yourself be taken care of Haru." Winking at her, I added "You can't look like an old woman on vacation, I forbid it. My aim for this journey is to make you wear at least one outfit with neon sparkles."
The look of absolute horror that my words induced on her face made me laugh. Rolling her dark eyes at my mirth she looked at me seriously "You seem to forget why I'm going there Dani" she shook her head at me fondly, lightly squeezing my hand "but yes, no matter how dumb you are, I still love you."
My lips curved up at her words "that's what I'm supposed to tell you, but of course you do, it's difficult not to love someone as amazing as me. I love you" tugging her hand I added "too" purposely emphasising the too and earning myself a glare from her.
Since the age of fourteen, Gauhar and I had a rule between us. She despised it when someone added too to their I love you's and it was established between us that it was forbidden for use between us unless we were not being sincere. I didn't know why she was so picky about it because she never explained it to me, not for lack of trying on my part. But I respected her wishes.
"Alright, Alright! I love you mooore Haru." I extended the O as I grinned mischievously at her, grabbing her arm with both my hands I looked up into her eyes "Are you happy now?"
A reluctant smile found its way to her face. Since it was difficult to hug her, the cramped airline seats restricting any kind of movement, I settled on squeezing her hand. Really, aeroplanes really needed a makeover. They had to make seats spacious enough to hug. I guess that's what I'm going to do next, submit a petition for an increase in seat space in aeroplanes.
Following Gauhar's gaze, I looked out of the window. All I could discern was the hazy light of the moon. The fluffy clouds make even the moon appear obscure. As silence settled around us I wondered what was going in her head as her onyx eyes stayed unfocused looking at something near yet far away.
Maybe it was the notion of change that scared her, or maybe it was going back and seeing that things hadn't changed at all. It was fascinating how things constantly changed around us, the seasons, the months, the days, even the people. Sometimes we hope, even look forward to things changing in our life like the difficult circumstances we are staying in and sometimes we wish, yearn even, for certain people in our life to stay. We want things to remain the way they are. But that can never happen, things change and will always continue changing.
We humans were strange indeed. We got bored of things when they turned monotonous; we desperately yearned for change. Still, the notion of change scares us, terrifies us even. The idea of uncertainty surrounding change was the reason we were scared of it. Maybe it comforted us to know what's going to happen, so that we could be prepared.
All our feelings were a contradiction. It was amusing how we seemed to always want things that had the highest potential to break us.