After the dinner, the three (yes, though very much forgotten, the third wheel Trey was still there!) took a long walk following Aris's usual route. The route passed by the cemetery, the jail, two orphanages, two nursing homes, and three hospitals, including a mental hospital.
Aris had made it a habit to take a walk at the end of each day to use up the remaining soothing power left in him for the benefit of those who needed it the most. And Noah, who very much liked this habit of Aris, had decided to keep it.
Since Levi had previously expressed his desire to join Noah on his 'charitable activities', Noah had invited him to go together. However, knowing that taking a walk through the neighborhood probably wasn't something Levi considered fun, Noah paid special attention to keep him in good spirits throughout the walk. He was very thoughtful, trying to keep Levi both entertained and comfortable.
In Levi's opinion, he needn't have bothered. When he wasn't stressing about a surprise boner, Levi found Noah's presence both very comfortable and very enjoyable. Even if the little one just stayed silent - that would be a comfortable silence. Levi found it pleasurable enough to just watch him, he could watch him forever and still never get bored.
However, Levi very much enjoyed seeing the little guy trying his best to show him max attention and care. Really made his heart feel like it was being tickled by a feather (❤). So, he kept his thoughts to himself.
However, after passing their third hospital, Levi was getting worried. "…isn't it tiring?"
They had been walking for a long time, wouldn't the little guy's delicate little legs get tired? And wouldn't those cute little feet start blistering?? And what about power overuse?? Not only had they been walking for a long time, but the little guy had also been using his soothing at high output almost non-stop over a large area for over an hour!
Levi had expected Noah to laugh it off and say it's nothing. Tell him that he had nothing to worry about. Or even say that he was used to it. But Noah's response took him by surprise.
Noah indeed laughed carefreely, but what he said left Levi shaken: "Of course it is tiring. But isn't that exactly how it's supposed to be? If one doesn't get tired after a day of work, it means that they didn't work hard enough!" Noah's eyes were curved into crescents as he spoke honest words with a casual tone as if they were something completely mundane and ordinary, "This is the good type of tired. The satisfying kind that is proof that you did your best."
Levi fell silent; however, his heart and mind were anything but quiet. There was this nearly overwhelming feeling welling up in his chest that he had no idea what to do with. He just wanted to press Noah into his chest and wrap his arms around him. Hug him, pet him, hug him some more, and finally, it would be the best if he could… not let him out of his arms at all for the rest of eternity. ○|￣|_
Levi wanted to pamper the little guy to the sky but at the same time, had no idea how to do it.
Levi was a loner wolf who had never been pampered nor pampered someone before. He wasn't used to expressing one's feelings, nor intimacy in general. The closest he had ever been to taking care of someone, was to feed their cat.
Even if his heart was ready to burst from the sugary sweetness, he had no idea how to act upon it. As an awkwardly silent guy, he didn't even know how to express himself out loud. And even the actions that he preferred using to communicate over words seemed to not be good enough this time around. Every single thing that came to mind seemed like it would be inappropriate to do.
He wanted to give everything to this little one, but what he could give, Noah already had. And what he didn't have, wasn't Levi's place to give.
The feeling of helplessness was overwhelming. Like thousands of ants gnawing at his bones and crawling under his skin. Maddening, yet though it was nearly impossible to bear, what other choice was there but to bear it?
In the end, after agonizing over it for a long while, Levi could only settle with caressing Noah's hair with trembling fingers. Fighting every fiber of his being to restrain the urge to bury the little one in his arms.
Like a happy little kitten getting praised by its owner, the little guy squinted his eyes in pleasure. And despite the sweetness the sight left in Levi's mouth, what he felt even more acutely was the excruciating ache in his chest. Like someone was clutching at his heart and mercilessly squeezing it. Like there was something inside that wanted to explode but could find no place to vent.
And then…
…he felt the little guy, who was already tired from overuse of his soothing, use the last vestiges of his power on Levi himself, to soothe the ache in his heart.
As the overpowering suffocation inside of him faded away bit by bit, Levi's eyes grew moist. Yet, all he could do was to powerlessly bite his lower lip, hoping that the physical pain would distract his mind from the internal turmoil.
And like that, their date, and the day itself came to its end.
***
Remember that gay test question which asked whether Levi had "same-sex sexual fantasies or dreams"? Yes, that same one he had confidently shot down with a resounding 'No!' the day before?
How to put this… well… Levi could no longer answer with the same confident denial… or, to be precise, couldn't deny it at all… ○|￣|_
Apparently, he had been so tormented the day before that at night, he had a very erotic dream that left his briefs very wet and sticky. Unfortunately, the dream didn't last long because Levi was very regretfully and very abruptly awoken by the damp feeling in his crotch area.
(ﾉಥ__ಥ)ﾉ ┻━┻
In fact, Levi couldn't remember the details of this short fantasy much, but he sure as hell remembered that whatever it was that he had been doing in the dream, as evidenced by the state of his briefs, was not appropriate in the slightest! And that the person who he had been doing those highly inappropriate things to was, without a shadow of a doubt, Aris.
Levi stood mortified under the running shower for an indeterminate amount of time. If he didn't have the benefits of modern technology, the warm water would have long run out, leaving him cold and shivering, and he wouldn't have even noticed.
'…That… can't be!'
He had scrolled through so many gay porn videos and gotten no reaction!
Then, the answer to his problem must lie with Aris, right? It's not that Levi is gay, straight, or whatever, it's just this one person he has a reaction to?
To test out his theory, Levi went through his browsing history back to that gay porn site and started to seriously watch the most popular video. The two handsome actors were popular porn stars, but he felt not a sliver of interest while watching them copulate.
Levi took it a step further, closed his eyes, and imagined himself as the one on top, doing the man on the bottom.
Hell no!!! A bad kind of shudder went through Levi's body. He wasn't disgusted with two men having sex, but getting intimate with a random stranger from a porn video made him want to puke. In his mental fantasy, Levi exchanged the handsome man with a beautiful woman, but his instinctual reaction was the same.
…alright, so it would seem gender and appearance weren't the main factors here?
Next, Levi exchanged the random beautiful woman with the image of his fiancé. The results were encouraging. He didn't want to straight out kick her out of bed, and there was no shudder of disgust.
But there was also no desire to do the unspeakable things to her…
Levi opened his eyes, looked again at the two, spirited men on the screen, and then he closed his eyes to perform his last test. He imagined himself on top, like one of the two men in the video, but the man squirming and panting under him was replaced with the wet-eyed and flushed Aris.
…
As expected…
…He only got rock hard for the little guy…
But why? Sure, the little guy was the cutest thing ever, but bunnies and kittens were cute too, and he didn't want to fuck them!
Suddenly he couldn't help but recall Fynn's words from yesterday: "You should really learn how to keep your emotions in check. Don't develop the feelings you shouldn't be having."
Could it be…?!
Could it be that all these sugary and fluffy things he was feeling in his heart aren't feelings one would have for a cute younger brother, but actually… actually…
Fuck! Had he fallen for his own little brother-in-law?!? Fallen hard in under 24 hours?!? 😱
It sounded absurd, ridiculous, something that should definitely be incorrect! Yet, as he listened to his loud heartbeat, Levi realized that his heart had no resistance to the idea. On the contrary, the more he thought about it, the more right it felt.
As he recalled those overwhelming emotions that kept strangling him yesterday, the tightness in his chest loosened as if he had suddenly been liberated from a constraint, as if the heavy weight that had been pressing him down all along had disappeared. A noose around his neck that suddenly snapped, setting him loose.
Every fiber of his being was resoundingly telling him that this wasn't something that could be kept bottled up deep down. These feelings, these very real and very potent feelings, could not be ignored or repressed.
And he had been very wrong to even try.
***
So, what did Levi do after waking up at 5 in the morning and being unable to fall asleep again after having a very satisfying wet dream about his little brother-in-law? Avoid the other like the plague, as any normal person?
No, of course not! After a long shower, he showed up in front of Cordia manor at 7 in the morning.
Cordia city lord who just got up and hasn't even finished brushing his teeth before a wild son-in-law appeared at his door: QAQ