I have no home.
A cat without a home is a stray cat.
Yin Zi says that I could stay on Luòyīng Mountain, here, where all the monster and animals would honor me as their king.
I don't know what a king is, but I had nowhere else to go, so I stayed.
[The first 100 years]
Cats naturally have really bad memories, so I decided to forget owner, and cast away all the unpleasant memories, and everyday, I would play around in the mountains. Riding the tiger, beating stupid
black bear, making fun of birds, and catching and hunting mice…..
From time to time, monsters and devils would come to challenge me or ask to marry me them, I obediently agree to their request, and then sent them flying or beaten frequently. Yin Zi says I'm becoming more and more bloodthirsty, increasingly more brutal, and quickly reaching the standards for a wildcat...
What's wrong with being a wild cat? I shook my head dismissively, trying to continue digging with my claws, so that the now dead weasel devil that challenged me will be buried and not stink.
After Yin Zi sees me clean up the battleground, he jumps down from very high, and cheerfully says, "Profit, profit, this weasel is our next door neighbor Yanshan Mountain's boss, now that he's dead, his collection of treasures will be owned by us! My lovely gems ah~"
"Meow woo~" I went around in circles seeing Yin Zi happy, I could not help but follow, "Yay profit, profit, my lovely fish ah~"
Yin Zi suddenly froze, his joyful face collapsed, "Boss, the treasure is not fish….."
"Is it roast chicken then?"
"No….."
"Then I will sleep." Hearing that there was nothing to eat, I immediately lost interest in Yanshan Mountain and went back to the cave to get some sleep.
"You can't!" Yin Zi rushed in front of me and stopped in my way, "Boss…..there are many little monsters and devils, if you don't go, I won't be able to handle all of them….."
"Don't wanna go." I willfully raise my head, my cat ears sticking straight up, to show that I had no interest, then secretly watched him.
After having spent a period of time together, Yin Zi naturally understood what I meant, he gritted his teeth and extended three fingers and said, "I'll give you three braised sea bass!"
I looked up at the sky and yawned, not saying anything.
"Five!" Yin Zi added.
I look at the grass, counting ants, I still did not speak.
"Ten…..I won't add anymore! I'm not good at fishing!" Yin Zi said anxiously, appearing with an unfavorable expression.
"I want to eat it tonight," I nodded in satisfaction and said, "Let's go."
Yin Zi transforms into a crow, and spreads open his wings, "Come on, but you are not allowed to bite me again."
I happily jump up and rub my head on the soft feathers of his neck, thinking about the hearty victory today. Although the person who makes me meals everyday is Yin Zi, one can only find sea bass very far away, I have traveled thousands of miles to date, but I have not memorize the way to the sea bass and have wasted a lot of time. I have to rely on Yin Zi every time, but that lazy guy won't make it for me to eat, so I have to resort to these methods to get him to give me fish. In total, by the use of force, I have managed to obtain 12 fish, but this time, I get a whopping 10 fish. I shall ask flower demon to make me dried fish this time and save it.
Counting the number fish on one hand, and wiping my drool with the other, we have finally arrived at Yanshan.
My 3 punches and 5 claws gets rid of the little demons in our way, Yin Zi rushed towards the weasel devil's lair, looking at the pile of shiny gems with eyes like stars. Touching this and that, and looking at this and that, and finally grabbing a large white bag, filling it with gold, silver, jewelry, vases and etc. Yin Zi throws me the bag that was now the size of a person, and we place it on his back.
I was outraged, "I am a cat, not a draft horse!"
"Fine, fine, fine, next I will bring horse demon Rome to help me carry."
I disregarded what he said and simply took a bite out of his wings…..
"Ahhhhhhhh!!" Yin Zi's pitiful scream pierces through the heavens.
[The second 100 years]
Less and less monsters came to fight with me, and even less came to propose.
The days became more and more boring, so I went and bullied all the mountain animals, causing them to run away when they see me.
Yin Zi seriously condemned me, he says this is not good, if you scare away all the animals, who will work for you? Who will smooth your hair? Who will catch fish for you to eat?
He said many many truths, but I did not understand, he finally got mad and scolded, "If you continue to do this, I will not give you any fish!"
I understood this sentence, with gloomy hanging ears, I swore not to bully the mountain animals, so I decided to go bully the ones outside of the mountain.
The following days were spent learning the culture, something beginning of a cat, this good…..behind is...uhh…..I don't remember the words that come next…..
He taught me about how the sound of one's voice can have a very hypnotic effect, that any demon or animal, as long as they listen to you for half a stick of incense time, they will fall asleep immediately. In the near future, when I have troubles sleeping, I would frequently come and ask him to hypnotize me, but seeing me so frequently, he often hides in his own secret room admiring and appreciating his piles of gems.
So I started to think that gems are really fun, and when I expressed interest in it and wanted to see his pile, Yin Zi refused to let into his secret room, but, that does not mean I can not sneak into it...
The lock on the door was easily broken, the room was filled with gold, silver, and precious stones of varying colours very pretty to look at, but they were not fun at all.
I take a few gems the size of a longyan*, and beat these marbles to the ground for a long time, but I don't how and where the fun is in these marble, what does Yin Zi even like about these marbles…..
*[TN]: Longyan is a grape sized fruit.
Perhaps it tastes good?
A weird idea came to mind, I immediately placed the most beautiful red gem into my mouth, licked it, and without hesitation, I bit into it.
The gem broke into pieces, the red shards scattered onto the ground and Yin Zi entered with his eyes wide.
His pupils enlarged, staring blankly at the scene, unable to speak for a long time, I feel as if I had done something terrible, and quickly, I sneaked out of the door, before he got mad.
Right when I exited through the door, I heard him roar, "Hua Miao Miao!! You stupid cat!! That was my only ice crystal ruby, ahhhhh!!"
His earth-shattering roar caused the hairs on my back to all stand up, I wandered for three days, not daring to return.
Loitering outside for so long made me hungry, so hungry that I can't stand anymore, so I quietly slipped back in, but Yin Zi's fire still hasn't been cooled yet.
He refused to cook, refused to work, refused to speak to me, everyday just sadly staring at the ruby shards, silently weeping. His pale little face looks like a daughter-in-law bullied everyday by the evil mother-in-law at home...
It made me feel a little guilty…..
Although I'm guilty, I did not apologize, because my pride as a cat does not allow me to apologize to a bird!
But…..Yin Zi looks really sad…..
After thinking it over, I look for whatever I can I find to eat, and then carrying a few pieces of dried fish, I left Luòyīng Mountain and began wandering.
I do not know how much time has passed, I climbed the sky-high Mount Everest, and then into the Turpan Depression, and traveled many miles through the Antarctic ice sheets, defeating countless demons as well as humans that wanted to bully me, and finally arriving at a crystal clear stream, to find a pebble.
The smooth and delicate pebble, contained shallow indents, and several colours like a lovely Calico cat, so incredibly beautiful, this is certainly the most beautiful stone!
I excitedly rushed back to Luòyīng Mountain, after getting lost countless times, I painstakingly return and go to Yin Zi, and proudly show him the pebble, with a curled tail I said, "I picked it up by the roadside, it's pretty right?"
Yin Zi wasn't as joyful as I imagined him to be, he held the pebble and said, "Stupid cat, you didn't come back for six months, over half of our territory has been taken!!!"
"Then we can beat them and take it back," I casually said, "It's easy."
"That's not what I meant….." Yin Zi's tears started to fall.
I was scared, so I quickly use my clothes to wipe his tears, but more and more tears fell that I couldn't wipe anymore, so I leaned over and licked away the tears on his cheek.
However, I did not expect Yin Zi to grab my ear, and loudly scolded me, "Stupid cat! How many times have I told you! You need to quickly change these bad habits! Your licking will cause a lot of unnecessary misunderstanding!"
"Ow, it hurts!" I kept calling, and hurriedly pushed him away, his sluggish body flies towards a large nearby tree.
I discontently twitched my aching ear, giving him an angry look.
Yin Zi bowed his head and gently said,
"Thanks."
I looked at him with surprise and finally understood a principal.
This crow likes getting beaten…..