The dress drags behind me as I walk slowly with a heavy heart towards the garden.
Must I feel this way when he does not feel the same towards me? If he should take a concubine, could he not speak to me about it? I am not only a queen, but his wife.
This is the very garden he made the promise to be a good husband. He should have told me I was excluded. Remembering our childhood seems like a joke now. After becoming an adult, he completely ignored everything dealing about me. Do I not have emotions?
I slump towards the ground after finally reaching my destination.
My tears start to flow undeniably. Yet, I still try to keep it in.
Hic. Hic. Hic.
"You asshole. Why do you show such shameless behavior in front of me and all those people? I'm your wife for goodness sakes. Never have I looked at another man all these years." I strain the last sentence out of my throat, "Just why am I not good enough for you?"
Yet, deep in my heart. I had expected this sooner or later.
I stay still on the ground from the occasional hics. Awaiting the summer air to bring its warmth with it. So that I may gain peace from it.
I wipe away my shedded tears after some time. How unladylike was this. What if someone had seen me?
My fears were brought to life. A rustling sound could be heard from behind the large pillars. "Who is there?" I ask, getting up quickly. Hoping it was an animal instead.
The person emerged from the shadows. When they were in view, you could see their tall domineering structure. At this point, one could tell he was a male. I looked at his face, my breath caught on hold. Was there such a man beautiful as him? The moonlight caused him to look illuminating. His blue eyes set like a deep void. Was there not such a word to describe it? Yet, I didn't idle long on it. Instead, I diverted my attention from his enchanting eyes and looked away.
"Sir, how long have you been there?"
He stares at me emotionlessly. After a while, he speaks, "Long enough to hear everything."
My face turns beat red.
"I would be grateful if you kept it a secret."
He tilts his head, putting weight on the pillar close to him. "And why should I do that?"
"Well- well, it would be nice of you. But, if you do not wish. I can not stop you. Good day sir," I say. Turning towards the path I came from.
"Little rabbit, are you running away so soon?"
I stop in my tracks. "If you have heard everything. Then you must know I am married. Not to mention I'm Queen Victoria."
"What good does it do to know?"
I widened my eyes, astonished with his shameless behavior. "Sir, would you want your head cut off?"
His chest deeply rumbles. "Do you not wish to know mine?"
"I do not, now if you'll excuse me. Someone might be looking for me"
I turn away from him once more.
"The person you are crying for. He does not deserve those tears," the man spoke from behind as I left the garden.
My walk back was the same as the beginning. I walked with a heavy heart. Do I not know? What a shameless man. It is a pity he was born with a face so beautiful like his.