"And also, it's just a friendly date." I added. He was slightly startled and lost his grin. His looks were different compared earlier. He immediately sighed and nodded.
" Yeah, it really is a friendly date."
Our ordered lomi were already served. We talk about each other while eating. He shared some details about himself.
He's a Scorpio, same as mine. He is an only child so at an early age he was helping his family. I wish I have that attitude too. That I can do things even though it's not my passion. I no longer want to be forced into something I do not like.
" I want to be an Engineer yet my dad wants me to manage our company." He said. " I almost finish my studies. Two more years and I can feel freedom."
He laughed slightly.
"You're accelerated?" I asked.
He nodded and then drank some water. Wow. He's really amazing. He's still 19 yet he almost finished his studies.
"I want to pursue Nursing." I said.
"Good for you." He answered me with a smile.
"Yeah," I laughed heartily. "My family is okay with it but they also want me to manage our business."
"So, what do you feel about that?"
"I can feel the leash chained on my neck."
I took a deep breath. I don't think I can share these things to him. I can't.
"Sometimes, the things we wanted to have can't be achieved. It needed risk for you to know if it's worth it or not. You need to fight for it. "
I stopped and momentarily stunned. Fight? I don't know. Maybe. I never tried to fight for it but I escaped. I did not make a way to get that. I have responsibilities in our family. I escaped those responsibilities. I became selfish and chose the freedom I wanted.
I do not want to be strangled because of the responsibility that my parents have given me. I did not see their destination. They are just preparing me for the future. It was really for me, after all.
So maybe dad, mom, brother, and sister were just busy. All of them. They did this for our family.
"Yeah, you're right, James." I smiled at him as I met his gaze. He have those blue eyes that I made me stares at those. He have those chills that when you look at those blue eyes, you'll fall for his trap. A hole that will made you drown from those gaze.
"Trust your parents as they know the best for they're children." He winked that made me laugh. He have those charms that will make you trapped.
"Thank you."
He smiled and reached for my hand. He brought it close to his lips before kissing the upper part of it. I was shocked by what he did.
"J-james."
"I want to see those smiles again…" he said before lowering my hand. "If only I can still see it again."
"What do you mean?"
I was suddenly nervous at what he said. He just shook his head and smiled at me. I met his stares at me that give some feels that I can't determine.
"Nothing. Just some lines that I got from a movie. " he smirked after.
I just nodded. I haven't heard of that in any movie yet. I just shrugged it off. He also paid and then we thought of going around.
"We'll wait until 9 PM. We'll go home after that." I just nodded again while the sight was in front.
We watched the Fountain Show together. It was cool as it made many colors and different exhibitions. We were pretty close there so some parts of our clothes got wet. While laughing, we left when it finished.
"It was fun." I heard my companion said while laughing as we got into his car.
"We are also wet!" I nodded at the same time while laughing.
He started the car. We reached our hotel rooms while still laughing. Fortunately, the people we passed did not care, but they looked at us as if we're going crazy because of how we were and how funny ou look was.
"Thanks for tonight, James. I enjoyed it. " I answered when I am in front of my room.
"I hope this is not the last."
I did not answer and just smiled at him. Maybe, we'll have this again.
"Good night James."
"You too. Sweet dreams. "
I turned around. I was about to turn the lock when he called me. I looked at him again. He stared at me seriously for no apparent reason.
"I like you."
I was stunned as if I had been taken to the stand and I only gave him a stare. I could feel the fast beats of my heart because of what he said. His stares were intense now compare earlier as his lips were form into a thin line. I even saw its adam's apple move.
Why am I suddenly nervous?
"… To be my best friend." he added.
I sighed, not sure if relieved or what. I looked at him again then to his blue eyes. He's very handsome. I still didn't lose my nervousness. He's pertaining to something I can't determine. I smiled to give him an assurance.
"I can't accept that, not now, but I'm sure we're friends."
Suddenly the intensity of his gaze disappeared, they were replaced by shock and his mouth fell open. I think he was stunned for a few seconds and just looked at my behavior before looking away.
"Hm, sure," he said and smiled as he turned to me. "Take a rest, Jane."
"Okay, good night, again." I laughed before entering my room.. I stopped looking at him and immediately closed the door. I suddenly leaned against the door and only then did I feel the rapid throbbing of the inside part on my chest. I need to calm down.
He's very... unexpected.
I took a half bath first before climbing into bed. I think I'm just hallucinating. It was like a dream. Never in my entire life did I expect something like this to happen. I didn't expect that a new friend will give me this feeling. This feeling that being wanted. That I'm also important.
I feel important to my family, but James is different. He's giving me various feelings that I can't feel to my friend nor my family.
He's very different.
But I can't accept his 'best friend' offer. I don't know. I could not understand myself why that was my decision.
I'm also confused.
Maybe I'm not ready to have that label and just stay as 'friends'. Something's telling me that I will stick to that label, as friends and not as something that more than that.
Or maybe, because I'm not sure if I can still trust other people again. My friends, who I trusted the most, were my best friends. The people who I've shared my secrets were also the people who betrayed me.
I'm scared that he will do the same too. Though I know he doesn't, but I'm not sure. The trust issues I have before didn't leave me eventhough I started to have some friends such as Chelsea and Cheska. They're also one of the people I kept.
That's why I will stick to the 'friends' thingy.
I just sighed with that. Maybe, when the right time comes, I will give the assurance that he's also important to me because he is my friend. I hope I can share my reasons to him.
My phone tinged beside me means that I have a message. I picked it up and saw James' name.
: Thank you for tonight, Jane. I owe you a lot. Good night. <3
I just smiled and replied to him, a 'Good night' too. I put my phone down on the bedside table before going to bed. This is a very good night indeed.