Once I stepped through the portal, I saw Gina waiting for me. She was a bit battered and bruised but otherwise okay. She was a little sad about the state of the Millennium Cheetah, but I had just the thing to make her feel better.
"Come on Gina, I want to show you something," I say as I take her to our new portal room, and see her eyes light up at the sight of the mash of magic and technology attached to our house. It looked and even seemed to work like the description in the catalogue. "This is how we will travel from one world to another for the most part, however it is random. If you find a way to get rid of the randomization or just build your own, we should be able to choose to travel to a world close to the last one we visited."
I place my hand on the DHD that controls everything and I see Gina intensely studying everything in an attempt to understand and improve. When the selection comes up Gina lets out a supersonic squee. "Ohmygodyousaidwe'dgobutnowwe'regoingtoSTARWARS!! Han, Luke, Laia, HYPERDRIVES! Choosing to stay with you was the best decision I made in forever!"
Star Wars the Original Trilogy, not a high magic world like I was hoping for as I believed that was still the best way to deal with the Reapers, but if we can awaken the force in the Mass Effect universe it would be a start. I wonder what I could do to turn Vader to the Grey side, or maybe the porn side considering the way the universe will eventually go.
So, first order of business would be to get a hyperdrive so Gina could reverse engineer it, and send the plans to the Mass Effect universe. They will be the biggest weapon against the Reapers. Not only will they open up a tech tree that doesn't revolve around element zero but they are faster than any Mass Effect engine, meaning that hit and run tactics would become a viable option.
Second order is to get the Rebels weapons with infinite ammo. Not quite as nice as a blaster for penetrating power, but great when you are trying to arm the unwashed and untrained masses. The key here is trade. After the Empire falls, the New Republic will need to establish new trade routes, new technology to generate income, and what better way to unite all the space nobles than an exclusive trade route to a new galaxy. It would be like if only one European country had access to the entire American continent. Hopefully this will help prop up the good guys well enough that the third trilogy never happens.
Still, it was probably best if I start calming Gina down so we could actually go. Well after I tease her a bit. "You know I could almost feel offended here. I give you food that would make five-star chefs cry, mind numbing orgasms, and I don't think I've ever seen you as excited about doing something with me as you are about going to a galaxy far, far away."
"For the love of Lucas, it's Star Wars. I don't know about those other Gina's but this one wrote a quarter of the Wookiepedia pages and memorized the rest. My dream wedding includes lightsabers. While other girls dreamed of being rescued from a tower, I dreamed of being rescued and then kicking ass on the Death Star. I can recite every line in the first six movies. I was made for this day."
"Remind me to find a way to let you watch the Mandalorian TV show," I said in a voice that was as casual as I could make it. I still wasn't prepared for her to use the talents I had given her to replicate anime physics and teleport right in front of my face.
"They made a TV show about the Mandalorians, the badass bounty hunters, and my mom's favorite race on your world?" asked Gina with the most intense stare I ever saw on a human being.
"Yeah, it's only been two seasons but they've been good ones, if not quite as mind blowing amazing as some of the hype would lead you to believe" I say with a nod. "I don't think Mass Effect would still have records of it after so long but we should eventually come across a world that has it, maybe even the complete series we can binge as a reward after saving a couple of galaxies."
"I consider this a completely proportional reward. Priceless other world Star War TV shows are priceless."
Together we fully opened the portal and stepped from our nice and comfortable home to a hive of scum and villainy, and covered merchant stalls. I quickly change my shroud to fit in with the local dress sense, but I also got a few quick glances doing so. In all honesty this wasn't the most ideal place for our portal to be considering I wanted to establish a trade hub, but it was also best if we met the party at the Cantina. That is if we could find it.
"I don't suppose you know where we are Ms. Wookiepedia?" I ask with a bit of hope. I only knew it as the Cantina, but logically speaking there would be more than one in a town this size.
"It looks like we're where Straight Street starts to curve into Corporations Road," said Gina and I could swear she could start naming the local buildings. "The shortest route would be the back allies that way, but we'd be slowed down because we'd get mugged at lease once while the main roads mean we'd probably only get mugged once at most."
I simply stop, stare, and say in complete truthfulness, "The fact that you know that off the top of your head really prefects the sexy nerd girl image."
"Good, because I want to be sexy here, for you. Like I said, this universe is the location of my dream wedding. I feel that what happened with the whole mental bond we have going through the shroud is kind of like marriage especially as I can feel you don't consider me a simple sex slave. Still, I'd like to be married, for real here someday."
"Not in Mos Eisley. I can agree to a future wedding in this universe, but maybe we can do it on the site of an ancient Jedi temple or something," I said, not really worried about getting married. I already knew we'd be together for centuries at least, and she wouldn't mind if I slept with other women in a harem I would eventually make. Next to that the commitment of a marriage wasn't bad at all. "Now lead the way to the Cantina so we don't miss our ride."
"Chalmun's Spaceport Cantina, not to be confused with the Methane Fix Cantina," Gina said as she confidently began to walk forward. I decided to let her have her moment, she really did deserve it. Having a fellow geek really was helpful in navigating the omniverse. Maybe I should recruit Rias from DxD next?
It was harder to dismiss the idea outright. She's a geeky weebo redhead who has a bust to rival Gina post super soldier perk. While it's true she isn't as smart or proactive as some, no one is perfect. Heck even Gina has an aversion to doing laundry and picking up after herself. Still, Rias would be miserable without her peerage, and I'd doubt I'd get enough points to buy all of them even if I captured and sold the Death Star.
It only took fifteen minutes of walking before we reached Chalmun's, as Gina insists it be called. Walking inside was like walking into a smelly sauna with so many beings cramped into one area on a planet where you could make a living farming moisture, so few of them bathed regularly. Still, it had a live band playing the unique space jazz I had heard as a child so it wasn't all bad.
The plot Gods must have smiled on us because we didn't even have to wait five minutes before Obi-Wan and Luke entered. I started to walk over to them only for Kenobi to spear me with a look that let me know that the General who fought in the Clone Wars wasn't completely worn away by living low for nineteen years. With little more than a glance he measured me, decided I wasn't overtly hostile, and decided he could take me if things turned sour. I couldn't help but agree with that final assessment, at least until I learn how to use Biotics and the Force combined.
"Can we talk for a moment Ben?" I asked, making sure to use his civilian name to show I didn't want to draw attention to him.
"You know this guy Ben?" asked Luke as he eyed me, picking up on the tension both I and Obi-Wan were trying to hide from him and the room in general. The Force is strong with this one indeed.
"No, however sometimes a stranger is simply a friend you have yet to meet, as the Force is telling me is the case at this time. Now if my new friend would please tell me his name?"
"Steven," I say even as I scan the room. "Let's find a place close to the Wookie, he remembers your old teacher well enough that you can use it to convince him and his partner to take you where you need to go for a small down payment."
"Very well," said Obi-Wan as Luke decided to be a typical teen and wander off on his own to show his independence. I signaled and Gina followed after him to keep him from getting into too much trouble.
Once we were seated, I began to speak. "Let me start by saying that you should use the Force to see if I'm telling the truth if you can. What I'm about to say is unbelievable unless you have proof or a power that lets you discern the truth."
"To my senses you and your companion are completely new to the Force. Not simply quickly matured like a clone may be, but it's as if every atom, your very souls have been touched by the Force for a scant few moments, something I would have thought to be unbelievable before I walked through the doors."
"That makes it easier. You see, I cross universes as easily as you cross worlds in this Galaxy. I know of your mission and what you will find. It's also what lets me know that what little good there is left in Vader can be ignited by the same thing the Emperor used to make him fall, family. So tell me, is the chance of Anakin being redeemed to a Grey Jedi or a Light Sith enough payment for me and my girl to hitch a ride with you?"
Obi-Wan's face closed down, showing no expression. "As a younger man such an offer would have been enough to tempt me to the Dark Side. I have struggled with this question for almost twenty years. Before I believe you or dismiss you, why do you think Anakin can still be redeemed?"
"If we hadn't come here then in the final confrontation Anakin saves Luke from the Emperor at the cost of his own life. This allows him to find inner peace and become one with the force. I'm offering a second path. The universe I'm from has no Jedi, no Sith to pull the Force one way or another. I believe there a man can walk a path that is neither truly light or dark to forge something new."
"A final act of redemption, and to be one with the Force is a fitting fate for a Jedi. If anything, I should toss you and your companion out of this Cantina and let the Force guide my steps. Yet it's telling me there is one last important piece of information you hold that can change my mind."
I nod my head. "The Emperor doesn't stay dead. He had clone facilities set up so that if he ever got killed or died, he would project himself into a new body. If you, Yoda, and Anakin die Luke will never become knowledgeable enough to truly defeat him. At best he will lead from the shadows, creating the First Order to replace his Empire, at worse he becomes a villain who never dies and eventually corrupts Luke."
"And you believe that me staying alive will advert this? I've never had the strength of a Skywalker."
"We need knowledge not strength alone. This isn't the first time the Sith have destroyed the Jedi. There are ruins out in the galaxy, knowledge lost to even the Jedi you remember, and my girl is an archeologist willing to dig up any hidden secrets. I believe that knowledge is what will help Anakin, and Luke defeat the Emperor together. On my world the story that involves rescuing the princess and Alderaan is called a New Hope, and that is what I want to offer all of you."
"I think that is enough to allow you to join our trip to Alderaan," said Obi-Wan as he moved to speak with Chewbacca. A part of me worried what those few moments of conversation would cost us in the future, but there really wasn't a way around it. I knew this was a gamble, that there wouldn't be a one step to redemption like in the movies. He would have to work for years to change who he is, even if he simply went to another universe away from all the expectations he is under here. Still, his abilities in a galactic scale fight couldn't be denied, and those were what was needed in the Mass Effect universe.
The events soon played out mostly like in the movie. Gina is the one that stepped in for Luke so there wasn't an arm on the ground, just an alien with a couple broken bones. Han was hired, and when we left the droids were gone. These events continued until we walked close to where my portal was on the way to Docking Bay 94 where Obi-Wan said, "I think Luke and Gina can sell the speeder, as I believe Gina will most likely get a better price than an old man like myself. As for Steven and I, I feel it's time that I was shown some proof of your claims."
I simply nodded and directed him towards and then through my portal, keeping a special eye out for Grindan, the long nose snitch. I didn't see him, but that probably didn't mean much with a professional like him. So I bit the bullet of my paranoia and stepped through with a grumpy old Jedi that could kick my ass.
The moment we entered the portal room Obi-Wan went pale and fell to his knees. It only took a moment for me to figure out why. Even if the Force existed in the pocket dimension of Sweet Home it wouldn't be as vast and all encompassing as the Force a Jedi or even Sith was used to connecting with. For someone as strong as Obi-Wan it probably felt like he had his eyes ripped out and hot wax poured into his ears.
I quickly changed the portal to the Mass Effect universe and dragged him through. Of course, I had forgotten in my panic that I had left that particular universe at a rather chaotic time. The Citidel tower was crawling with C-Sec agents, all of whom were turians, all of whom were not happy to have a couple of humans messing up their crime scene.
"Oh fuck me sideways," I complain even as I make a dome around myself and Obi-Wan using my shroud so all of the security officers can see the blazing blue Tron lines without knowing they signify computers. However, considering the fact that they instantly opened fire maybe they did know what it stood for.
"That was a unique experience, one I don't look forward to repeating," rasped Obi-Wan as color began to come back into his face. "They don't seem to like you very much."
"They probably blame me for the omnicidal space squid that attacked this place a few hours ago. They're right to do so, they just don't know that I moved the timeline up by about 30 years. They aren't invincible though. Vader is strong enough he could probably crush one of these himself, and seeing that should rally the rest of the galaxy around him, letting him be a grey hero this time around in a universe with a balanced Force. Unless you're about to crush all my dreams and tell me this universe is full of the Dark Side or something."
"No, the Force is neutral in this universe, truly neutral. While I overcame my own personal struggles with the Dark Side long ago, there has always been this pull, a constant pressure to let me know what direction not to take that is now absent. If I had to describe the force here, I'd say it isn't Light or Dark, it simply is."
"I figured that was the case, but waned to get conformation first. It seems simple to an outsider at first, Light good, Dark bad. However, when you dig into the legends of past Force users it becomes apparent that the Jedi became too cold, too disconnected in their efforts to become pure. They could no longer truly be the peoples' protectors and guides because they lost the ability to relate to those who aren't Jedi. Anakin was always passionate with a big heart, and I'm gambling on him being able to start an order of Force users once he lets go of his unjustified anger."
"And you think simply giving him Luke will do this?"
"Luke, Leia, and Padmé. I can bring her back, let them be together again. My hope is that this will be enough to bring him back from pure darkness. Now can we go back to the desert planet before we miss our ship? We can talk about this more on the trip."
"Very well," said Obi-Wan and I took us back to my home and then immediately back to Mos Eisley.
We quickly made our way to Docking Bay 94, avoiding a squad of troopers as we did so. Luke, Gina, and the droids were already there. The Luke seemed to be stuck between the hormonal nineteen-year-old following the sexy girl, and being slightly frightened by her amazonian physique and geeking out. Han on the other hand was trying to hit on Gina and failing hilariously.
"Ben!" said Luke with a wave over to us. "Boy did you ever make the right call having Gina sell the speeder, she got twice as much as I think I would have."
"That merchant should just be happy my sister isn't here, I'm not nearly as good at bargaining as she is," said Gina with a smile as she came over and gave me a quick hug and kiss.
"Hey Buddy, you hold onto this one you hear me? Any woman who knows how great the Falcon is on site is worth keeping around," said Han and I could hear a bit of frustration in his voice. "Now that we're all here maybe we can all take off. I was under the impression that all of us were under a tight schedule."
"Sounds good to me," I say to him as I begin to walk up to the ship before turning to Gina. "I take it you took care of the spy?"
"His communicator may have been accidently, maliciously, destroyed as a warning not to talk about us."
The flight out was much less daring than the one in the movie, but much more preferable in my mind. In a matter of minutes, we had left atmosphere and sped into the black of space. The moment we jumped to hyperspace Gina went back to scanning the ship with her glasses, and I had a feeling the next Millennium Cheetah would be an exact replica down to the dice in the cockpit.
"I believe it is time for us to continue our talk," said Obi-Wan, his face made of stone. "How exactly do you plan to bring Padmé Amidala back from the dead?"
"The company I work for has granted me some abilities, one of them is to summon women from a list, a list she is on. They are quantum clones so I won't be ripping her soul from the Force if I bring her back. Also I won't lie to you, you'd be able to tell anyway, they are supposed to be sex slaves for whoever summons them, but they don't have to be. If I summon her, but don't bind her she will be free to be with her family."
"The last time she saw Vader, he almost killed her. Are you sure she would even want to be with him after something like that? Also, how can you know she and the twins will be able to keep him from falling into old patterns in that new universe you showed me? One act of good, even if it does involve self-sacrifice does not truly redeem a person. How long would he have kept striving to better himself if he had lived?"
"I don't know," I admitted even as I saw a way my plans would go up in flames. "I'm not all knowing, I just know more about events and people than most. You have pointed out that yes, this could blow up in my face. Still, isn't it worth the risks? That other universe needs someone to rally behind, and he would have the right combination mystery, power and charisma to be that person. Wrap it up as a place where his family would be safe from anyone who would want revenge on Vader and we have a combination that will urge him to fight to become a better man."
"I will not stand by and watch as Padmé is used for this against her will. If you truly have this power then use it to bring her back, and let her decide her fate. Now if you will excuse me, I wish to train Luke while we have time to do so."
I watched him go and realized he was right, before I took another step or made another decision, I needed to summon Padmé and see if she was willing to be reunited with Anakin again. So, I found an out of the way alcove and spent two points to summon her.
The woman that appeared was a shell of a human. Oh, she was beautiful and physically healthy but there was nothing in her eyes. It was then that I remembered how she died, by simply giving up on life. If she was still at the same point in her depression then I would have waisted two points as her will not to see an evil version of her husband would overcome her will to live.
"My name is Steven, and I'm the one that summoned you. I have a plan to redeem Anakin that involves him saving a galaxy in another universe, but I need your help. You were right, there is still good in him, but I need your help to bring it out. Right now, he is a monster, but it's because he thinks he's truly alone. As far as he knows Obi-Wan betrayed him and he killed you by accident. So yes, part of this is your fault, for giving up on him, on your children, and on life all together. If you truly believe there is good in him then you need to fight for him."
"How dare you," hissed Padmé. "I know how much he has been suffering, and what he has done. You never truly understood the Force, did you? From the moment that I took my first breath in front of you it has been giving me visions of what I experienced after death. I was never able to move on from my sorrow, but I clung to Anakin at his best. I was always there, at our wedding, waiting for the man I married to come to me, but it was always Vader that arrived with the stench of fresh kills hanging around him."
"What about your children? Your son is on this ship, and your daughter is being tortured by a father who would burn the galaxy to the ground then see any harm come to his flesh and blood. That doesn't even count the galaxy full of being he can save if we get him onto the path of redemption," I say as I continue to push as I see a spark in her eyes. Sometimes those who are passive are weak, I know I was in my last life, but that doesn't mean it applies to everyone. Padmé has always had a strength in her convictions and desire to help others that few see, but she is still human and even the best of us can have moments of weakness. The thing that makes the strong, strong, is that they can push through their weakness, lift a little more than they could yesterday, know a bit more, heal their heart a bit more. I've always considered Padmé to be strong, so it's time to see if she is strong enough.
I continue to push, hoping to change that spark into a wildfire. "We both know he fell because of the manipulations of an old man on the Dark Side, and the people on the Light Side forcing him to be something he isn't. I want to take you and your family somewhere Obi-Wan considers truly neutral in the Force, no Light, no Dark, just you and Anakin being who you were meant to be with your family. However, for this to work I need you to help me convince him that this is the correct path to take."
"Very well," said Padmé, and her eyes weren't broken any longer, but didn't have the same strength as the Queen that took on the Trade Federation to free her world. "When will I meet him again?"
"In less than an hour. Today the Empire will destroy Alderaan just to showcase its new weapon. This is when they fully step over the line and incite most of the galaxy to rebel. We're on our way to rescue your daughter and hopefully capture the weapon that is capable of destroying worlds."
"And Anakin is a part of this?" asked Padmé as a tear rolled down her cheek.
"He doesn't care. You gave up on everything in your way and he gave up on everything in his. He doesn't hate Alderaan, but he is completely apathetic about everyone and everything. The only way he can access the Force at all is through his own self-hatred and the physical torture he has his suit inflict on himself."
"You must be a very desperate man to risk so much on two very broken people. I would like to see my son if he is indeed on this ship."
"I can do that, but just to let you know I have no idea how to tell him that you're his mom. I mean you're just eight years older than him, and now you're fifteen years younger than Anakin."
"Then it would be best to meet them as Padmé, if you can manage to do so."
"No," said a new voice and we both turned to see Gina coming out of a crawlspace a determined look in her eyes. "You aren't just Padmé, you're his mom. Moms are important, and for nineteen years he's been wondering why he doesn't have one. A part of him feels like it's his fault you weren't around, even if he knows in his head that it isn't. He just lost his aunt and uncle, and if Steven's plan fails, he'll lose Obi-Wan. I could only see my mother for one day a year for most of my formative years. People said that I shut down during that time, became colder, and that was with a father and little sister to help me. Trust me, Luke will need family for this."
I took her hand in mine and sent love and reassurance through our link even as Padmé looked unsure of her actions. I had always thought that the trauma of all but losing her mother and grandfather to the same incident was deeper than Fred showed in his book, but this sounded a bit more than I could handle on my own. Maybe I could get a mind healer Waifu… I mean send Gina to therapy so she could talk to a professional about this.
Finally, Padmé seemed to come to a decision, though I would never know what it was because at that moment the alcove filled with beeps and whistles that I was able to understand.
"It's you!" shouted R2D2 as he rocked back and forth in joy. "How is it you? Did you get cloned? Ah, who cares, you're you and your back!"
"It's good to see you as well R2," said Padmé. "I'm surprised you recognized me after all this time."
"You understand him?" I asked even as Gina was visibly trying to hold back a squee of joy.
"It's easy enough to see R2 is excited, but I don't know anyone who understand droid binary."
"Honey, you give me mind blowing orgasms and a raging lady boner ever time I look at you, but right now the techno-shroud is the best thing you've given me," said Gina as she all but teleported to R2 to have a conversation with him.
With Padmé looking confused I took pity on her and had the shroud create a tentacle from my back in the typical grey with blue Tron lines color as I explained things. "This acts as a bridge between organic and machines for me and Gina. Think of it as having the ultimate slicer at your beck and call. Do you need information on a network? Just think about what you need and it will find it in moments. Is the information on a different network? It can subsume machines until it finds where the information is stored. It's why I'm confidant that we can take over the space station we're going to. I figure fifteen minutes and it's going to be all mine."
"The galaxy has truly changed for the stranger in my absence," said Padmé as she walked down the corridor that R2 had come down.
"Sorry, that's mostly me," I said as we rounded a corner to see Luke training against the ball with the helmet on and blast shield down. Looking at Obi-Wan it looked as if he had seen a ghost, a reasonable reaction all things considered.
Han on the other hand let his eyes rake up and down the former queen before he said, "Who's the stow away? She'd nice enough that I can take my payment in the form of a kiss if she's going to the same destination you are."
"I'd rather kiss the Wookie," Padmé said in a frosty tone to let Solo know just how far out of his league he was.
"She's also married, and her husband would be rather displeased to hear that you tried to seduce her," said Obi-Wan as the color returned to his face. I was actually kind of worried about him, I don't think living being are supposed to be that pale. "I take it you have agreed to the plan?"
"Such as it is. If there is a chance of bringing him back, I need to take it."
"I'd make a sarcastic comment about how much I love the amount of faith you have in my plan but even I know this is a gamble. He's either going to believe that you are Padmé, and you are in every way that counts, or he will be thrown into a frothing rage that we cloned the love of his life. If he chooses option number two, I'm going to take the Death Star and the Flacon directly to the new universe. Obi-Wan it will be up to you to make sure he doesn't get us until after Leia is rescued and I've completely taken over the Death Star."
"Woah, back it up. No one said anything about a Death Star, and while I don't know what it is it sure doesn't sound nice," grumbled Han.
"You'll see. Are we going to arrive at 0200?" I ask.
"0205 actually. I told them my ship is fast, just not quite that fast. To be honest with names like Death Star I'm considering blowing this entire thing off. Money doesn't mean much if you are too dead to spend it."
I hold back a sigh. Han deciding we're too hot would be exactly what we didn't need right now. We still needed to get onto the Death Star if any of my plans were going to work. "Would it help if I said there was a right beautiful princess on board that can offer you a nice bonus?"
Just as I opened my mouth to straighten things out an alert sounded through the common area. "Looks like we're coming up on Alderaan. One princess rescue and reward coming up," said Han as he made his way to the cockpit and Luke took off his helmet.
"I meant more money!" I called after him, even as I saw Luke stare at Padmé. Please just be confused over the new person and not have another teenage crush. While I wouldn't really be able to blame him for admiring his female relatives, I really didn't want the name Skywalker to equate to space Lannister. "Jaba is the guy to hook you up with that kind of women, not me!"
"Do I know you?" Luke asked Padmé, his voice filled with something I couldn't quite place.
"That is a long, and very strange story. However, we should be focusing at the task at hand and save Princess Leia from Vader," said Obi-Wan right before the ship began to bounce around.
"What's gong on?" asked Luke as he entered the cockpit.
"If you see any Tie fighters try and convince Han to follow them, they will lead us to the Death Star," I say to Obi-Wan and hope that the five minutes difference wouldn't cause too much trouble.
"I should see this," said Padmé as she made her way to the cockpit as well, leaving me and Gina.
"You aren't leaving as well?" I ask as I take a seat.
"Millions, maybe billions of people died. It feels wrong to get that scene for my scrap book," Gina says as she sits in my lap.
For an instant a thought flashed through my mind of opening my clothing at the crotch and fucking Gina until we had to hide in the smuggling area. The sensations had become so familiar that for an instant I could swear I felt her mons kiss the bottom of my shaft as I bottomed out in her, and the way her inner walls would try to pull me in deeper when she climaxed.
I saw in Gina's eyes that she noticed the physical effect of my little daydream, and from the gleam in her eye and the slight perverted grin on her face she wouldn't mind acting it out. I'll admit to being tempted, very much so. While Mind Defense allowed me to act calmly under pressure it didn't completely eliminate stress, and sex with Gina had quickly become my favorite form of stress relief. Still, I shook my head. Things were going to go too quickly to indulge.
Soon enough we were shoved into the smuggler holds, a truly uncomfortable experience with three more adults than in cannon. As soon as we got out, I started to lay down the plan, even as I change my shroud into Stormtrooper armor.
"Obi-Wan we need you to be on Vader duty. Lure him back here so we can see if Padmé can bring him closer to the Light than Lawful Evil. Gina will be on the tractor beam in case I fail. I'm going to take over the Death Star using the shroud. It shouldn't take too long, then I will open the way for Han, Luke, and Chewbacca to run the fake prisoner scam to bust out the Princess."
"Who put you in charge?" asked Han with more than a bit of sarcasm in his voice.
"I was put in charge by the plan, as in I have one. If anyone else has one I'd be happy to listen to it and debate it for the five minutes we have before the Stormtroopers come back to do an in-depth scan. This plays to everyone's strength as I know it, but if I'm missing something let me know."
"My plan has you disable the tractor beam and we all get the kriff out of here," said Han. "We're on the station that just blew up a planet, one way or another this is a bad place to be."
"Ordinarily I would agree with your pragmatism, but the Princess must be rescued. She is influential enough that you will get rewards that go beyond money if you wish them," countered Obi-Wan in the all-knowing voice he had.
"To hell with it all," groaned Han but everyone could see the seed of temptation Obi-Wan had planted take root. "Okay fine, I'm in, but if you die, I get to say I told you so."
"Fair enough," I say with a nod. "Now find somewhere you can shoot the incoming Stormtroopers. Me and Gina will provide a distraction by posing as a couple of them while you take them out. That is, if it's okay with you."
"If you want to put yourself in front of a bunch of guns, be my guest. I just have trouble when people volunteer me for the firing squad."
I actually smile at that, but it wouldn't be seen from behind my fake Stormtrooper armor. "You're traveling with an honorable Wookie warrior, a Jedi Master, a kid that had the heart of a hero, and a former queen that would throw away an entire political deal to save one life. You have a lot of people that would actually volunteer before you were dragged in front of a lot of blasters. Also, if everything goes right, you should only have to fire a blaster after you get the princess from her cell. I'm counting on you having enough of a survival instinct to shoot stormtroopers in the back when needed."
This seemed to appease him enough to shut up, or maybe it was those survival instincts telling him that danger was closing in. Either way we spent another two to three minutes in silence until a couple of technicians came up the ramp.
"Hey, what are you two doing here?" asked one of the technicians.
"Waiting for you," I reply, right before me and Gina put them in choke holds. At times like this I was grateful that Mind Defense let me stay calm under pressure. Humans usually need to be trained for this level of fighting, both mentally and physically, but I can learn the physical stuff as long as I keep fighting and don't die and Mind Defense lets me survive under the stress of combat without freaking out.
Soon they are both out and moved to the side, and then Han called the two stormtroopers guarding the ship up to help out. This time I'm a bit more ruthless and snap the necks of the troopers. If we had just shot them with blasters the burn marks on the armor would have told anyone who looked at Han and Luke that some form of combat happened.
"On to step two," I mutter as Han and Luke put on the armor, and soon enough we were making our way to the control room. With my shroud we didn't need to pretend to have a faulty communicator, I simply pushed the technomancy creation into the controls on the outer side of the door and it instantly opened. Chewbacca proved that fans were right to love him as he kicked ass in hand to hand. Unlike in the movie the Wookie took out the entire room before we had a chance to do anything taking one guy out with one punch and then leaping across the room to knock out the second. The entire fight was over in less than five seconds without a shot fired.
"And that ladies and gentlemen is why you don't mess with a Wookie," said Han, and you could hear the smile in his voice.
"You will get no argument from me," said Obi-Wan even as I began to use the shroud to infiltrate the computers. "The Wookies have always been stalwart allies and brave warriors during the times of the Republic and especially so during the Clone Wars."
Chewie growled in agreement that his species are badass compared to us hairless pink things. At least that's what I got out of it, as I didn't include the universal translator in my stormtrooper armor.
"Okay everyone, now it's time for the hard part," I say even as I bring up the blueprints of the Death Star on the monitor. "Gina, this is the closest place you can shut down power to the tractor beam. Han, Chewbacca, Luke, the princess is located on level five, detention block AA-23. She's scheduled to be executed, but luckily for us the people in charge decided to be stupidly evil and make a production out of it so we have half an hour before they send someone to kill her. I'm inserting a message about a captured Wookie being taken to that detention block AA-20. Close enough to let you walk right up to the cell of the princess but far enough away that it won't raise any red flags. She's also just watched her home planet get blown up after the most intense torture session you can imagine. Forgive her if she's a bit snippy. Finally, Obi-Wan gets to act as Vader bait."
"You know, the more I think about this the more I have to question why we want Darth Vader to come to us instead of running far, far away from him," said Han.
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I agree with him," said Luke with a voice that held more than a bit of anger. "I know that he's Obi-Wan's old apprentice, but he killed my father."
"Because I'm his wife, and there is still good in him," said Padmé, even as he got a look like his dick and balls had attempted to hide out in his stomach for fear of retribution of past thoughts. "I know that he has done great evil, but if we can take him from this path, it would be a great blow to the Empire, and if Steven is to be believed then he is also needed far away to do some good."
"I'm not going to expect him to instantly become a saint or anything, but I think this will work. If it doesn't, I still have some backup plans," I try to explain in a way that wouldn't make me seem crazy. "If we can get Vader on our side, fantastic, if not hopefully it won't be the end of the galaxy."
"Well so long as I get paid, I'll go along with your crazy plans, but this princess better be really nice looking," said Han as he put the cuffs on Chewy. He was already looking better and a part of me admired how he was willing to get back onto the metaphorical horse, but still.
"How many times do I need to tell you I was talking about money before it sinks into that thick skull of yours?" I ask even as I look forward to Leia tearing verbal strips from the rogues hide.
"At least one more," he responded with his insufferable smirk.
With those parting words, everyone went their separate ways as I stayed with the droids to monitor them and take over the Death Star from the inside out.
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May 30, 2021Report
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