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And so, the current flows by notTowfu
 Anime » Kimetsu no Yaiba/鬼滅の刃 Rated: T, English, Romance & Hurt/Comfort, [Shinobu K., OC], Words: 67k+, Favs: 106, Follows: 129, Published: Mar 10 Updated: Dec 197Chapter 2
You accompany Shinobu back to Butterfly Mansion on foot, the residence situated somewhere in her personal territory. When you left headquarters with the help of various Kakushi, you had braced yourself for things to turn awkward, but to your utmost surprise, Shinobu proves herself to be fantastic company.
In addition to her astounding wealth of medical knowledge, the Insect Pillar is an adept conversationalist. Years of experience from holding conversations with complete strangers has shaped you into a person capable of sustaining a spoken connection even with the most difficult of customers, and with a naturally charismatic Shinobu, your words come easily as water flowing down a mountaintop.
Your nervousness at talking to a Pillar, idols from farfetched tales and rumours, fades into the back of your mind.
The only wrinkle thus far is when you mentioned how this will be your first visit to Butterfly Mansion. It was an anxiety inducing thing to be the target of Shinobu's strange, disbelieving look. Her smile feels cutting, like it were shaving off a layer of your skin. It thankfully returns to normal when you explain how you'd never experienced any life threatening injuries that could not be treated at a Wisteria House.
"Sometimes I forget," Shinobu says after listening to you. "That by nature of my territory being so close to headquarters, it's near impossible for slayers to find my residence by themselves. It's always the Kakushi who bring them to me. But to have not been to my mansion before this… you must be more skilled than your rank implies!"
"I wish that were the case," you say when you notice Shinobu reappraising you with her sideways glance. "The compliments should be allotted to whoever arranges my missions. No matter how strong a person is, luck played a large part in letting me get this far."
You aren't paying lip service or trying to downplay your efforts, but even you're amazed at how long you have managed to survive. You've known far stronger people who go on missions and never come back.
"That should be a good thing," Shinobu replies, "Though I notice you don't sound happy about it?"
"The thing about luck is that you won't know when it chooses to abandon you. We can try to prolong it, but nature has a way of righting itself. And this is likely an unpopular opinion, but…" There is an agreeing look on Shinobu's face from all you've said. You consider your next words for some time, thinking if you should test the waters.
"But?" Her eyes gleam and her neutral expression slightly cracks to reveal her curiosity.
You both will be working together for an undetermined amount of time. It would be good to see if there are any lines you should not cross. You go for it. "But there should be no shame in abandoning fights you can't win. I'm not saying one should abandon innocents to demons, but rather than throwing yourself into a reckless fight that ends in death, surviving to see the dawn of a new day means one less victim for the demons."
You almost immediately regret it when the words leave your mouth, but your own curiosity at how Shinobu will react is too much to ignore. You and several others are an infamous topic among the more zealous corps members, and you suspect it might have to do with your demon hunting methods.
You never ran when there were people to be protected, but if you think you can't handle a demon, either due to difficult terrain or unfavourable conditions, you will always bid a swift retreat. You would always catch and slay the demon in the end, but according to a Slayer who'd once worked with you on a joint mission–
'What kind of Slayer shows his back to a demon?!'
Shinobu does not speak for a long while, and it not until the figure of the mansion enters your vision that you start to grow antsy. Perhaps you were wrong and bringing up such a controversial topic has tanked her opinion of you completely.
That thought steals the breath from your lungs. Oh god… you've just preached about the sanctity of life to a Pillar who has rescued more than a lifetime's worth of demon victims and slayers over the course of her entire career.
"It should be obvious why that opinion is unpopular, Tsuchinoto-san," Shinobu finally answers in a voice neither too heavy nor light. "Anyone who becomes a slayer wishes to kill demons even at the cost of their own life. Granted, not everyone will hold the same conviction, but most of us probably do."
You turn to look at her. The absence of her smile is haunting and it sends a chill crawling up your back. The feeling of having treaded a tiger's tail doesn't disperse even when her expression reverts back to her usual, smiling one. "However, it is not my place to judge. Your life is ultimately in your hands, and your way of thinking, though disagreeable, doesn't break any of the Corp's rules."
You suppress the sigh of relief. "I see."
Shinobu's smile gentles slightly at your stiff reply. "And while certain Pillars would seek to dissuade you of that way of thinking, I'm not one of them." She puts a hand on the gates of the Butterfly Mansion and pushes it open. "We have arrived. The estate is not big enough to get lost in, but it'll be better if I gave you a tour before letting you run off on your own. Would you like to see your room or take a look at the place you'll be working in, first?"
You've pushed enough for today, so you settle for replying obediently, "I'll let you choose, Shinobu-san. I'm fine with either."
Shinobu takes you to her laboratory. It is large, the size reminding you of the main hall of a martial art or kenjutsu institution. Situated at the back of the mansion, the room is cool and packed wall to wall with bookshelves, chests and tables brimming with neat piles of loose paper.
All the information and plans Shinobu shows you is taken from an average looking chest of no particular note. You don't find it strange, placing important items in gaudy and overtly fancy trunks tends to work against their owners if robbers come knocking. Not that it will be a problem considering who lives here, but it's better not to tempt fate.
The information you need to look through is contained in bound notebooks thicker than an engorged bicep. There are a great many of them and by the time Shinobu brings out everything of importance, the notebooks form an awe inspiring tower jutting toward the lamp dangling from the ceiling.
A quick flip reveals their page count to tread the territory of ancient texts, making you unduly excited by the prospect of reading them. Unlike their musty exteriors, you suspect their written contents will be anything but outdated and boorish. You confirm this when you pick up a random notebook and start reading. Your head grows dizzy as you skim over the meticulously collated information, the script inside so unerringly neat it is almost as if the words were printed onto the parchment using wooden block stamps.
You vaguely hear Shinobu say something and the muted thud of a door as she leaves the room. When she doesn't come back, you assume she has left to attend to other, more important matters and plant yourself in a nearby chair to start reading.
The random notebook you grabbed turns out to be a collection of research notes on how the decline of herbs in an area can be used to identify if the surrounding populations have become a demon's hunting ground. It has no right to be as interesting as it is, but your voracious appetite for information and general love of reading sees you completely compelled.
The next time you look up, it is due to a hard shake to your shoulder that jolts you out of concentration. You blink the swirling black words from your eyes, placing the notebook face down on your lap. By the time you stop seeing double, you realize you've been staring at the Insect Pillars face for some time.
"I hope you don't find the organization's efforts lacking," Shinobu says, amusement plain on her face.
"That's definitely not the case. I've only looked through one," you hold up the notebook. "And it's been enlightening to say the least. The amount of detail in it is… mind blowing." You've read and researched enough on your own to tell how uncanny it is for a topic to be written this clearly and succinctly, and a niggle of self-doubt sprouts in your chest. "You mentioned to Oyakata-sama that you needed advice on transporting medical supplies, correct? I'm not sure how much help I can be, seeing as I'm primarily a grain merchant. I dabble in other types of goods on the side, but never before in medicine."
You've only looked through a single notebook, but considering the lengthy history of the Demon Slayer Corps and how vastly the organization has spread throughout Japan, you think every possible thing that can go wrong would already be accounted for with an uncanny level of foresight based on past experiences.
"Oh, you don't have to worry," Shinobu says. "Everything I brought out are simply primers to let you understand the various practices and businesses under the Ubuyashiki family. Oyakata-sama and I actually have a specific request that is hopefully, attuned to your strengths."
She goes back to rifle through the unlocked chest and takes out a sheath of paper bundled together with a fraying string. The largest moth-bitten document in the pile is spread over the knee-high table near the door, and she beckons you over to have a look. You make your way over in three strides, maintaining a respectable distance from her before you bend over to read it.
"This is a map?" You wrack your brains as to why she chooses to show you such a thing. After a solid minute of contemplation, your eyes skimming over the names of the various prefectures and regions, marked Pillar territories, the realization hits you head on. "I see… so my role in both operations is to ascertain if the transport routes that have been planned out are reliable."
"Your primary task, yes." Shinobu passes you a strange looking contraption you identify as a fountain pen. You gape at it for a few seconds. The Corps is certainly bleeding wealth, allowing common rank and file rabble like you to use this kind of exotic item. "Your second objective would be to mark down other, more efficient routes that you know of. It's purely optional, but accomplishing it would be immensely helpful. Depending on the information you give, we can make improvements to our current plans."
You can do that. You can do more than that, having uncovered and used non-traditional ways of travel to every city and village over the years. Transporting grain is similar to transporting other types of goods in that you'd always pick the safest, most cost-efficient path to reach your destination. The anxiety in your chest is dispelled, replaced with confidence. You grip the fountain pen and turn to her, nodding.
"I should be able to help greatly with both tasks."
"That's reassuring! I look forward to what you can accomplish when you start first thing tomorrow."
Your brows slant into a frown. "Why not immediately?"
It takes a second of Shinobu scrutinizing you to realize your mistake. Oh. No. You want to curl up and die. Where has your usual diplomatic skills gone to? You're already treading on thin ice after upsetting her earlier, and you've gone and done it again. The rules of the Demon Slayer Corps may be scant, but they are indomitable. You've witnessed what can happen to Slayers who defy the orders of those above them.
Shinobu lifts a hand to her mouth and titters. "While I'm glad to see you're eager to get down to business, it's already long past the time for dinner. I don't particularly want the reputation of a slave-driver, you realize? I would be upset if people started to despise me because of it."
You glance out of the window in surprise. How did you not notice the sky had already gone dark? "Pardon my rudeness, Shinobu-san. I didn't realize it was already this late." Evidently, you're more affected by your new job placement than you first noticed. You've not slipped up on simple etiquette or manners for a long time. "I'll accept any punishment you'll give for making you miss your meal."
Shinobu waves your apology away. "This is barely a matter worth fussing over. As long as we're working towards the same goals, no one can fault you for speaking your mind. Transparency and honesty are extremely important to me. Don't forget what I told you this morning, dear."
You try not to put too much worth into the term of endearment she uses. When she'd brought you to tour the estate, you'd observed the way she mingled with the occupants here. You were surprised to find out she treats kakushi, servants and slayers exactly alike. There is no bias in her words, no distinction in her attitudes. From what you hear, it is rare for a Pillar to act this way.
One method you caught on easily enough is how she breaks down the boundaries between her and others using affectionate language. There are many ways to open a person's heart, and this is the perfect method for a person such as Shinobu. With her charisma and genteel personality, it already makes it hard not to be charmed. People don't stand a chance when she actively goes out of her way to do it.
You now understand why she has such a expansive legion of admirers. It is simply inevitable, and with her being the only female pillar, her status within the Corps and everyone's hearts must be similar to how they view deities. Revered and untouchable.
"I appreciate the reminder. I will do as you suggest, then." You quickly fold the map and help Shinobu put it away. The notebooks are left where they are while the map, sensitive information it is, gets locked away with a beetle-shaped padlock. Not wasting anymore time, Shinobu then ushers you out of the laboratory and down the hallway.
It takes a fair bit of walking before you reach the main hallway connected to the mansion's entrance. Shinobu stops in front of a slatted wooden door, sliding it open to reveal an adequately sized dining hall fit for ten to fifteen people. The main dining table is a long and formal looking antique fenced by two smaller ones on its left and right.
You enter the room behind Shinobu. She goes ahead to seat herself at the head of the main dining table, which leaves you standing awkwardly near the door. You recognize the faces seated at the main table from your tour this afternoon. They are the girls under Shinobu's tutelage and from their attitude towards her, you can tell the group is tight knit with bonds identical to those of a real family.
"Shinobu-sama," The twin tailed girl you recall as Aoi says. "We almost thought you wouldn't be eating with us tonight." A quick glance around shows you the faces of hungry children. Their attention revolves between you and the food in front of them and though comical, you feel a stab of guilt at being the one to place them in that position.
You drop into a kneel. "It was due to my inefficiency. I apologize for forcing you all to wait."
"T-There's no need for that!" Aoi's mortification stops you from bowing. You look up to see her staring straight at you, quite obviously conflicted by your deference. She's around the same age as when you first joined the Corps, slight baby fat yet to fade from her cheeks. "We're the ones who wanted to wait to eat with Shinobu-sama. And we were already expecting a short delay, anyway."
"Tsuchinoto-san, have you already forgotten what I told you?"
You flush in embarrassment at her scolding tone. "My apologies."
When you're back on your feet and sheepishly taking a second look around for a place to sit, you finally notice three pairs of eyes gazing wondrously at you. The butterfly girls, Sumi, Kiyo and Naho, don't seem too perturbed by your presence, unlike the other Aoi and the other girl sitting blankly beside Shinobu… what was her name, again? Kanao? You're not the sort of person to force someone to acknowledge your presence, so you take her purposeful ignoring of you in stride.
Back to the three butterfly girls, you suppose their receptiveness to your sudden intrusion has been tempered by working at the Butterfly Mansion. They seem to be considerably younger as well, which might have something to do with it. Children tend to indulge in curiosity rather than be wary.
You meet their gazes head on. You feel the embarrassed pinch of your lips melt into a genuine smile and give them an acknowledging nod. The three girls break away to exchange looks. Then suddenly–
"You can sit beside us!" they call out in unison.
Shinobu pins you with amused smirk that makes you duck your head. When you slide into the offered seat beside Kiyo, the girl with two pink butterfly clips, Shinobu brings her hands together in a clap.
"I'm grateful everyone waited on us. All of you must be starving, so don't hold back and eat your fill," she says, smiling indulgently. The emotion behind this smile is softer than the ones directed at you, spilling over with pure, unadulterated affection.
Before you dig into your meal, you turn to Kiyo and the other two girls. They pause their chatter, giving you time to say, "Thank you for letting me sit here."
They beam happily at your words, and it is Kiyo who says, "You're welcome, Tsuchinoto-san!"
The rest of the dinner passes without fanfare. You don't speak, merely soak up the chatter between the everyone at the table. Shinobu doesn't participate much, but when she does contribute, all the girls stop to listen intently. It is easy to grasp Shinobu's position in their hearts.
Occasionally, even the blank faced girl Kanao will chime in with her own opinions. It is strange, but she seems to flips some sort of coin before she speaks. You file that information away, though you doubt you'd bring it up with the Insect Pillar. Whatever the girl's reasons, they are none of your business.
Though you don't contribute, you find the company pleasant. It has been a long time since you've eaten in such an intimate setting, surrounded by people with no ulterior motives or harboured grudges. An added bonus is that the food is a hundred times better than the roadside fare you're used to. You've scarfed down everything on your tray before everyone else has made a dent in theirs.
Chicken with breadcrumbs, the meat tender and springy. Dishes of fresh vegetables steeped in sauce. A bowl of lukewarm miso, sprinkled with green onions and a generous offering of rice. This isn't a meal, it's a feast.
You're nursing your fourth cup of tea, your stomach basking in utter contentment, when something pulls on the corner of your haori sleeve. You look down to see Kiyo tugging it, but when you look up with a question on your lips, it is Sumi who grabs your attention. Her butterfly winged hairbands catch the light and glimmer blue as she leans over Kiyo, her chopsticks extended in your direction.
"Tsuchinoto-san," she says in a lowered voice. The piece of fishcake between her chopsticks dances a cheerful little jig. "Take this. Thank you for helping Shinobu nee-san!"
The open expression she wears practically radiates joy, and beside her, Kiyo looks equally delighted. You see the other butterfly girl, Naho, peeking at you in a similarly excited manner.
Your hands curl into fists. If anything happens to these children, you will kill everything that dares hurt them, and then yourself.
You thank her and take the offered treat. You're chewing on the fishcake just as carrots are deposited in your bowl. A faint, pleading whisper rings out, "Tsuchinoto-san, Tsuchinoto-san. Naho can't finish her veggies. Can you help?"
Your recall a time when you had done the same for someone else. Your heart twists uncomfortably, but you reply with a confident, "Of course."
This enjoyable dinner has to come to an end eventually. Aoi, who you find out is the one responsible for tonight's meal, comes around to clear everyone's trays. When she collects yours and gets to the three girls, you see her squint at their suspiciously empty trays.
Standing between Naho and Sumi, Aoi questions, "You three finished everything? Even the vegetables?"
She receives a chorus of "Yes, Aoi!" and turns to direct her suspicious stare onto you. Her forehead lightly creases when you don't react, nothing impeccable at all about how you're carrying yourself. You did not become a successful merchant without being able to handle pressure.
"The food was delicious, Kanzaki-san," you say. "The meat was exceptionally tender. I've been to restaurants which charge high prices for something that delectable. What did you use to marinate it?"
"…Kanzaki is too formal," Aoi replies. "And I'm younger than you, so you don't really need to use a honorific."
"Then, Aoi." You nod. "The sauce you used for the meat. Do you think you could tell me what you used?"
"Nothing special that can't be bought at the market." Aoi looks thoughtful. Good, you've distracted her. "I'll write down what I used and pass it to you next time. If you aren't used to cooking, I think it's doable even for beginners."
When Aoi leaves with a pile of tray gathered in her arms, you catch the eyes of your fellow conspirators and grin. When the three girls run off, following on the heels of Kanao, you decide it's time to retire to your temporary accommodations. The room Shinobu allotted you is fairly close to the private lab. Maybe you can whisk one of those notebooks back for a quick read before bed.
Thinking this, you push your chair aside to stand.
"You shouldn't spoil them too much," Shinobu says.
Your hand gripping the chair goes stiff. With an aching slowness, you turn to face the Insect Pillar. Despite her casual smile, chills inexplicably run down your spine.
"I shall overlook it tonight, but keep in mind how your actions affect them in the long term. I won't be happy if I'm forced to discipline them." Shinobu's eyes are glacial. If you didn't know she'd mastered the breath of the insect, you'd assume she'd control over the ice element.
It takes all of your strength to not swallow. "…I understand," you say. Though you are struck by the urge to escape the dining hall this instant, Shinobu looks as if she has more to say. You will your feet to stay in place and wait, albeit tensed, for her to gather her words. What she says next is not what you expect.
"You mentioned this afternoon there should be no shame in abandoning fights one cannot win." You answer her with a nod. Her stare turns distant. Her lips form a flat line you'd normally assume as distaste, only in this case, the negativity she harbours doesn't seem to be directed at you. "But if a person is forced into a fight that ends in their death, even if the enemy is defeated… will it still be counted as their loss?"
"This enemy," you ask. "Is it a demon?"
Shinobu nods gravely. "Based on what you said, then even if this person gives up their life to kill the demon, victory still goes to Kibutsuji and his ilk. Most people would hate this outcome with every fibre of their being."
"That's the main reason this opinion is unpopular, yes." The few Slayers you told your opinion to had flown into a rage. You don't blame them.
"I don't understand." Unlike the others, Shinobu sounds genuinely curious at why you continue to defend this viewpoint. "If death ends in our loss, then doesn't it mean humans destined to lose? Thinking like this breeds hopelessness."
"The problem is that people assume the victory of a human is the same as a demon's." This is a thought you've always held, and since Shinobu has asked for clarification of her own volition, there is no reason for you to mince your words. "When a slayer goes up against them and survives, even if they live out the rest of their lives without encountering another demon again, it won't change the fact that they've won."
Shinobu waits patiently as you pause to deliberate on your next words. "On the other hand," you continue, "A demon is only victorious if they kill the slayer out for their blood, but so long as they continue to live, even if one slayer dies, more will inevitably come seeking revenge. And unless the Demon Slayer Corps ceases to exist..." You meet her eyes and for first time since arriving at the mansion, let your lips stretch into a wide grin.
Shinobu's laugh rings sweetly throughout the dining hall. "Then there will always be slayers, humans, to oppose them." Her elbows on the table, she gently rests her chin atop her steepled fingers. "I see. So that's what you mean when you say you want slayers to live."
"It's quite a long winded explanation," you say. "But with this, I hope I've cleared up any misconceptions you might have."
"Your way of thinking isn't wrong." Her expression turns teasing. "Though I suggest you change the way you word your opinion. If you'd said what you intended from the start, I have a feeling that opinion would gain popularity fairly easily."
You cough into your fist. "I… will take your words into consideration."
"That is all I wished to say. Please have a good rest. I look forward to seeing you at breakfast tomorrow."
You leave the room with a sluggish bow, amazed at how the conversation had played out. You never thought Shinobu would rehash the topic, not when she obviously disagreed when you first brought it up.
When you settle into the futon that night, you recall her surprised expression with some satisfaction. You think with a flash of irony how Shinobu is the first person to discover the true meaning of your intent, when she was supposed to be one who would adamantly refuse to listen.
Rewritten/replaced on: 1/11/20
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