I woke up around the middle of the night. I looked at Jake's face. the moonlight helped me see his handsome face. the waves rocked us back and forth. Jake looked so peaceful in his sleep. I remembered the day before. How Jake showed me his dominant side. How he was rough but it felt good. I wondered what would happen when me and Jake got to shore and rejoined civilization. would we stay together? Or would he leave? I kept thinking about this subject. I didn't want Jake to go. I can't believe I'm catching feelings already, I thought to myself. He probably just wants some ass and I just happen to be the only female around at the moment. He is probably a fuck boy. who's to say he won't leave me as soon as we get to shore. I wouldn't doubt he has a girlfriend waiting at home for him. he is extremely handsome. there are prettier girls in the world who are better than me. I wanted to cry.. I scowled at myself for being so selfish. I barely know this man, and I am thinking I have some claim on him, or even think that he could love me. I looked at him as he turned fully towards me and rest his arm over my bare stomach. I really wanted him to be mine. but I need to prepare myself for when he says he doesn't want me. Which meant I had to distance myself from affectionate interactions with him. I moved his arm off of me and got up to get a blanket. I covered him up and I then went to the other side of the raft with my own. I rested my head on my arm. I felt so sad that I am forcing myself to do this. but I know how something like this ends, and it's not pretty. I closed my eyes, ready to sleep away all the negativity. I woke with the sun shining in my eyes. I saw Him looking at me as well with a scowl on his face.