-one can promise actions,but not feelings,for the latter are involuntary.He who promises to love forever or hate forever or be forever faithful to someone is promising something that is not in his power- 'Nietzsche'
In the serenade of the black, the stars are a choir,they are lights that sing in infinite patterns. Sometimes eyes need music, and the darker the night the sweeter the song.
'wish I don't wake up and sleep for eternity '.Exams start tomorrow 'if I want to live quietly I have to ace it 'But in the ten hours I've been in bed I must have woken up six times. Not for that long each time, but enough to break my sleep into un-refreshing chunks. With every disturbance there is a new nightmare.I couldn't answer the questions,I panicked because of anxiety,I didn't finish the test.....By the time it was six o'clock my eyes were already wide open ,my heart throbbing 'sighs ....Let's finish it '.
The school hallway must have been designed my a manic depressive, either that or someone obsessed by grey emphasizing today's vibes.
When my eyes flitted to the small window to the examination room they left again just as quickly. 'How was an ordinary door so hard to look at? It made no sense'In there was a desk, a paper, a pencil. In six hours the test would end. I choked down the rising bile and consciously flexed my hand, feeling at last the pain of my nails digging into my palm. When the school bell punctured the near silence i almost bit my tongue in two. I rose, oblivious to the bleach tinctured air and rested my fingers on the cool metal of the door handle. 'Finally i can breath'.Making my way to the hallway I found my two friends waiting for me ,obviously exhausted.
"-How was the exams ?will you get top of our school?"
"-Fine I guess and it's the last time you ask me about the results "
"-Don't worry I am sure that we all did well"
"-Hope so"
"-If we are going to solve the madness of the world, we can start by respecting the human brain as an organic computer that works best with logic, emotion, creativity and self driven passion,though we have the capacity for random access memory, it is a poor way to educate and the reason our schools damage our innate genius capacities."
"-here we go again if you used your I.Q in the right things you would always rank in the top"
"-What???"
"-why don't you start a politician career?"
"-Really does it suit me ?"
"-of course Marry"
"-What are you planning to do after"
"-Sleep isn't obvious?!"
"-Me who wanted to eat before going home , please Lilith "
"-Definitely no plus my mom goes home early I have to be there before "
"-An you?"
"-Sorry I promised to pick my little brother from sports later"
"-I will never forgive you for letting me down sobs..."
"-Come on don't be childish you will get over it"
"-This Sunday it's the exams end party, if you guys miss it we will end this friendship!"
"-ok!!!!Then see you laterz "
Standing by the kitchen's door I stared at my mom's figure.Happy , anxious, angry,excessively emotional.My mom was always overwhelmed by her feelings treating us depending on her moods.However she chose her children over her wellbeing 'i respect her for that '
"-hi sweetie you're home"
"-you have came earlier than I thought "
"- well you know your father and his criticisms so I need to get things done perfectly ."
"-Why are you going somewhere "
"-We have to visit your grandmother she isn't felling good these days ,So this weekend you will stay alone with your brothers I can count on you to look after them"
"-Ok as you wish mum " 'inside I was feeling a mental breakdown '
"-Between how was the exams"
"-As always "
"- Excellent that's my girl don't you live a life like mine"
Being alone now I enjoyed the silence while listening to the birds melodious song 'I want to go away somewhere far away from problems,worries,sadness.Can'i just disappear?i envy those who died and are now lying in there grave '.Suddenly my brother bursted into the room searching for something.
"-Privacy or politeness does it tell you something?"
"-Want to get beaten up don't you dare talk to me at that tone"
"-What are you looking for maybe i can find it?"
"-The calculator "
"-you can borrow mine I don't need this days"
"-nice thanks "
"-sights..."
Click;;;;
"-What now???"
"-Dad wants to see you "
"-Why?"
"-How do I know?"
Going down stairs to the living room there was my father sitting.
"-Have you called me ?"
"-yes sit I want to talk to you"
"-what's the matter"
"-About your friends don't you think that you are hanging out way too much?"
"-if that's what you think I will no longer go out with them"
"-plus there is that guy who is with you and your friends a lot lately "
"-You mean Ruka?"
"-I don't care about his name I'm warning you there is no friendship between different sexs so it's the last time I see you together otherwise "
"-I have understood. is it all?"
"-You can regain your room "
"-Thank you father"
The next day as I was told i looked after the house and didn't wander anywhere at least that what I was planning to do but:
"-please, please he wouldn't know "
"-No!! Marry .Do you want me to get into trouble?"
"-I will make sure that your father won't notice"
"-how is that"
"-Everything has a solution,don't you think so Anna"
"-Marry is right you were closed at yourself long enough you should accompany us"
"-Nearby"
"-yessss!!!!"
.30 min later.
"-can one of you tell me why we are at that café"
"-We have to support Ruka a.n.d there we have the most handsome man in the world and this guy."
"-This guy has a name young lady"
"-who apparently believes that it's the nineteen century "
"-you are quite disrespectful "
"-Calm down you two and Ruka do something about it"
"-let them be An it's the first time Yael and a human click on well"
"-A human?????"
"-Ah!!!...we are all humans aren't we...."
'This idiot how can he call himself an angel '
Chatting casually,I let them be and went to order drinks,working meticulously in his own world Ramiel 's eyes looked more beautiful than ever 'wait ,stop it '
"-one iced americano and two vanilla lattes "
"-Coming"
Waiting for my order I watched every movement of his
"-Are you planning to stand here until you get your latte"
"-Does it matter?"
"-No you are the client after all "
"-About yesterday?"
"-What day?"
"The ghost story remember?"
"-mhm?"
"-Don't play dumb!"
"-hahaha.....Sorry it's just too funny to play with you ,what about it?"
"-I'm sorry....I didn't mean what I have said "
"-Finally and I was thinking when will I get my apology "
"-I didn't know you were that sly?"
"-And you that funny?"
"-Whatever"
"The world is unfair but this is how thing is little girl don't be too sad over what happened"
"-Emotionless?"
"-that's the answer"
There again he made that expression 'like a porcelain vase about to broke into pieces.'
'Why do I fell that way ?'
......
Blood stained the white floors ,all that was left of the blood that had once flowed thick and scarlet in his veins was clasped in her callused fingers warping him in her arms .the blood poured out as if in slow motion. It came as a red fountain to spread over the already wet mud, every projection showing the struggling of his heart .Death wasn't predictable.The hooded vale of death had hung over the world for a long time, always threatening. But how can that happen to an immortal living at heaven,she couldn't understand .The tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down her face. She felt the muscles of her chin trembling like a small child and She looked toward the window, as if the light could soothe her. Hearing her own sounds, like a distressed child, raw from the inside. It takes something out of her she didn't know What?.That's the way it is for the survivors.It's like a theft of the spirit, an injury no other person can see.Why?Why?Why?Why??????????!!!!!!!
"-Nothing last forever Vivian especially if it's forbidden "
"-Hmm,where is god?"
"....."
"-Punishment .ha!"