The final days of summer soon came, sending plenty of students around the country into a frenzy as they tried to finish up the homework they had put off all break. Considering the mood she had been in, one would've thought Chiyo would be among those unfortunate crowds, but thanks to her decision to simply stay home, the gal just ended up doing the homework to kill time. However, having it done did little to lift her spirits.
"Haaah…"
"Chi, if ya sigh one more time like that, I'm gonna throw ya outta here."
Chitose, having returned from her vacation, had truly reached the end of her rope with Chiyo. Coming back and seeing absolutely nothing had changed, she had gone on another lecture about how Chiyo just needed to suck it up and take responsibility. Alas, those words fell on deaf ears, as Chiyo ended up just shrugging and mumbling.
Ever since Chitose had found out what was going on, she had thought it would be best to let the two girls work things out themselves. After all, it was their problem to solve, so forcing them to do something about it could easily just make things worse. But, with the ways things were going, Chitose was starting to change her mind.
"Don't you two sit next to each other in class?" Chitose had asked. "What're ya gonna do if ya haven't talked by then? There's no way you can just sit in silence." In response, all Chiyo had done was make a bothered face before marching back to her room. "She's just pouting at this point," Chitose thought. "That's pretty rare. Haven't seen her do that since she was little. Although, it was cute back then. Now it's just annoying."
".....haah…"
"Alright, that's it!" Chitose exclaimed, standing up immediately. Chiyo looked up at her, startled. "G-God, is it that big of a deal if I sigh?!" "It is when it's a bunch of times a day!" Chitose shot back. "Now c'mon!" Reaching down, Chitose put an iron grip on Chiyo's arm. "Ow!" the gal cried. "That hurts, big sis!" "So does my head from listening to you moaning every day!" Chitose yelled. "I'm tired of it, so we're going to Mi-chan's place! You two are gonna sit in that damn apartment and talk it out like actual human beings instead of depressin' lumps, and ya ain't leavin' until it's all cleared up!"
"But-"
"No buts! Today! Now, Chi!" Giving no room to debate, Chitose used all her strength to drag the unwilling gal out to the car. Once she was inside, it seemed she had no plans of trying to make a grand escape, so Chitose relaxed a little after clicking her own seatbelt in place. "Chi, if ya actually give a damn about this girl, then it shouldn't have to come to this." "I do give a damn!" Chiyo exclaimed. "Then act like it," Chitose said sternly. "Love ain't just about sunshine and roses, y'know? Shit like this happens, and it's up to at least one of ya to do somethin' about it. If neither person moves, then… well, I really doubt you could call that love."
Chiyo glared at Chitose for a moment, but soon her gaze dropped. "Like I'd know… it's not like I've ever been in love before…" "Everybody has to go through their crash course," Chitose said more gently. "And if anybody says they crossed the finish line without a dent, they're a liar. The course is full of twists and turns and obstacles that'll put ya through hell sometimes. But, if ya stick with it, you can come out of it all with somethin' pretty nice at the end."
It felt like advice Chiyo needed to hear more than she wanted to hear, but she still listened all the same. The gal took in her sister's words, trying to fit them to her own situation. Although, she still felt hesitant. Everything Chitose was saying was true, and yet…
The question was, could Chiyo find the words? "Will I be able to get through to Mi-chan?" she wondered aloud as the car headed down the road. "Just give it a shot, Chi," Chitose said. "It's better than moping around, ain't it?" Yet another thing that was true, and as Chitose drove, Chiyo thought about everything that had happened between herself and Michi.
It was a lot. Too much to reflect on in the span of a short car ride. But as Chiyo did so, she began feeling that fire she once felt before. It was the one that kept her going, its fuel often being the short, blonde girl with a penchant for not being honest when she should be. Even if she didn't know it, Chiyo knew that Michi was often the reason she felt motivated to charge ahead. Looking back, her life had been so aimless until she met Michi. Now, her world practically revolved around her.
Knowing that, Chiyo sighed to herself. "What have I been doing this whole time?" she wondered. "No matter what's happened, there's no way I can just stay away from Mi-chan. If something's my fault, I just need to keep apologizing until she accepts it. Why did it take so long for me to understand that?"
Perhaps in the grand scheme of things, it hadn't been all that long, but to Chiyo, each of those days had felt like a week, making the weeks, months and the months even longer still. Quietly, miserably, she had sat in the dark, blaming herself and wishing she hadn't made such a blunder. But now, as she was being forced to act, she was regaining something she had been losing.
Chiyo clenched her fists tight in her lap as they neared the apartment complex. The aged, faded white of the building nearly faded into the background against the cloudy skies. Putting the car in park, Chitose got out and looked up. "Looks like it might rain," she commented. Chiyo, having gotten out as well, was staring up at the spot where Michi's apartment was. "It's rained enough," she said quietly. Hearing that, Chitose turned to her, a small smile on her lips. "Now you're startin' to sound like your old self."
Walking up to the right floor and number together, Chitose was the one who knocked. It was a few moments before Michi came to answer the door, but when she did, she seemed to tense up at the sight of Chitose. "H-Hello," she said nervously, like she was expecting something bad. "Hey there," Chitose said with a small wave. "I brought ya somethin'."
Reaching to the side of the doorframe, Chitose pulled Chiyo over. "Here. A present from me to you." Michi only stared, looking a little wide-eyed as Chiyo stood in front of her. "H-Hey, Mi-chan," the gal said awkwardly. "So like, um… we should talk, yeah?" "......" Michi was silent, unsure of how to respond.
Of course, a part of her wanted to talk to Chiyo, but she had no idea what to say. When she opened her mouth, what words would come out? Would it be another lie? Would it be something more honest? Or, more frighteningly yet, would it be the feelings that resided deep in her heart, the ones that she absolutely never wanted to speak aloud?
Michi remained frozen, tense as she stared at the Wakabayashi sisters. "Hey, Mi-chan," Chitose said suddenly. "Listen, what's happenin' here ain't a choice, ya got that? I'm not suggesting you two talk it out. I'm demandin' it. So let my lil' sis in and talk. While you two do that, I'm gonna stand right outside this door and make sure neither of ya run away."
Opening her mouth to protest, Michi was about to speak when Chitose put a hand up. "Stop. I know what you're gonna say, or somethin' like it." She dropped her hand, wearing a serious expression. "I'm not sayin' you two need to bare your souls to each other. I know feelings are… complicated, to say the least. But it's pretty damn obvious to anyone with eyes that you two are pretty close. If you wanna keep that, then make it happen."
Then, Chitose leaned down, making sure she was next to Michi's ear and that Chiyo couldn't hear. "Chi needs ya, Mi-chan. And, well, I get the feeling you need her." Standing back up straight again, Chitose gave a shove to Chiyo's back, sending her straight toward Michi. The gal managed to stop a mere inch away from the girl, but before she could turn and protest, Chitose looked away, making it clear the conversation was over.
Awkwardly, Chiyo looked at Michi. The girl looked up at her, a similar amount of uncertainty riddling her face. However, unlike Chiyo, Michi was able to get past her initial feelings, soon taking a deep breath in and then letting it out. "Let's get this over with," she muttered, heading back inside the apartment. "Sure…" Chiyo replied, following after her.
Once inside, Michi took a seat on the couch, and Chiyo sat next to her. "This… is about as uncomfortable as I thought it'd be…" Chiyo thought. "What should I even say to start? 'I'm sorry' would probably be good, but maybe Mi-chan doesn't want to hear that? Ugh, I have no idea…" Sneaking glances at Michi, the gal wondered if she was having the same difficulties. "What is it that Mi-chan wants to say? Does she want to yell at me for what I did? Or does she want to tell me that we shouldn't be friends anymore?"
However, to Chiyo's surprise, it wasn't anything like that. Beating the gal to the punch, Michi spoke. Her words came out soft, but slightly shaky, as if she was afraid of the implications that each word could possibly hold. But as each one slipped past her lips, Chiyo's surprise grew more and more. They were only a few words, but they rang loudly in Chiyo's ears.
"Hey, Chiyo… what are we?"
What are we? It was the simplest of questions, yet it felt as though it had the most complicated of answers. "W-What…?" Chiyo uttered. "Mi-chan, whaddya mean?" The girl, having been staring ahead, turned to face Chiyo. "You know what I mean, Chiyo," she said in that same quiet tone. "I've spent weeks thinking about it. Thinking about what happened with Ikehara-san, thinking about our… relationship… Thinking about you and what… you mean to me. Finally, after all of that, that question was the one thing that came to mind that I haven't been able to figure out for myself."
"So how would you define our relationship? Because I don't know anymore… I'm not sure… I know anything anymore…" Michi fell silent, leaving Chiyo to figure out what to say. "Mi-chan, I…" she began, but she wasn't sure where to go with that. There was the option of confessing, but the atmosphere felt so heavy that the lovely words of a confession would just sound cheap and hollow in the moment. "Forget telling her how I feel," the gal thought. "I have to figure out what our relationship dynamic even is right now."
"What do you… think we should be?" Chiyo asked tentatively, but Michi just shook her head. "I don't know…" she muttered. Seeing that, Chiyo wondered if that was really Michi's answer. "Does she really not know? Or is she only saying that because she actually does know?" Moving closer, Chiyo reached up to cup Michi's face. "Mi-chan, do you-"
"Stop!" Michi shouted, smacking Chiyo's hand away. "Ah…" Chiyo let out. "Right…" It was important to address what their relationship was now, but before that, they still both needed to talk about that awful kiss that had caused all of this. Judging by Michi's reaction, it was clear to Chiyo that there were still some major aftereffects in play.
Although, instead of looking angry, Michi just looked hurt. "Sorry…" she mumbled. "I didn't mean to hit you like that…" "No, it's fine…" Chiyo said back. "I get it." Again, an uncomfortable silence came over them. Desperate to move things forward, Chiyo was the first to speak again.
"Mi-chan," she began. "I'm so, so sorry for what I did. I should've asked you about what I should do, or at least taken your feelings into consideration more. I just… I really wanted to help Haru-chi and Kana-chan… no matter what, I guess…"
Michi was quiet, but after several long moments, she spoke. "...I know how you are, Chiyo. I know you like to help your friends… but… Just once, why couldn't you be selfish?" Michi turned, looking directly into Chiyo's eyes. "I wish… I wish you would've thought about me more, back then, instead of Endo-san and Kana-chan…"
"But now, because you sacrificed our relationship for the sake of theirs, I have no idea what to do now." "Sacrificed our relationship?" Chiyo repeated. "I-Isn't that a little dramatic?" "Is it?" Michi asked with a glare. "Because that's how it feels to me. Or were you just so desperate to kiss someone that Ikehara-san sounded like a good option?" "Whoa, hey, what's with the attack?" Chiyo asked, feeling like she was on the defensive. "It's true I haven't kissed anybody on the lips in a while, but I'm not that much of a slut! If I'm going to kiss anybody of course it'd be-"
Chiyo stopped herself, but it was too late. "It'd be who, Chiyo?" Michi asked. Her face still showed a frown, but there was something more in it too, like she was hoping she knew what the answer was. "C-C'mon…" Chiyo said weakly. "Don't make me say it…" "Why not?" Michi pressed. "Why can't you say it?" "Because, it… you… ugh…" Chiyo sputtered.
"It's me, isn't it?" Michi asked point-blank. "If it is, you could just prove it right now and kiss me." "W-What?!" Chiyo exclaimed. "M-Mi-chan, do you have any idea what you're saying right now?" "All I'm doing is asking a question and making a suggestion," Michi said in an effort to justify her own words. Chiyo stared at her, stunned, but soon, she just averted her eyes. "...Even if it is you, I can't…" "Why not?" Michi asked again. "Because you're… different…" Chiyo said, barely audible.
"So you can kiss Ikehara-san, but not me?" Michi asked. "No, that's not what I meant!" Chiyo cried. "It's not because of who's who! I mean, it is, but like… ugh, I'm getting all confused!" "Well that makes two of us…" Michi grumbled.
"...Hey, Mi-chan," Chiyo said. "What's it gonna take to get us to move past all this? I feel like I have to ask, since like, I'm the one responsible, y'know?" "...I don't know…" Michi muttered. "I wish I could just forget about you and never have to deal with you again… but… the thought alone of doing that practically rips my heart in two. No matter what happens, I've become certain that I need you in my life, Chiyo. I'm… miserable without you. So we need to figure out how to move on, together."
"You… need me?" Chiyo uttered, wide-eyed. "D-Don't make me say it again, stupid…" Michi said back. "But just because I'm saying that now, doesn't mean things are back to the way they were." "Right…" Chiyo said, coming back down to reality. "I guess only time will be able to fix this…"
Suddenly, Chiyo felt herself get pushed down, landing on her back on the couch. "Oof! H-Hey, Mi-chan, what the… hell?" Once she realized what was happening, Chiyo fell silent. Staring upwards, she saw Michi hanging above her. "M-Mi-chan?" the gal said uncertainly. "W-What're ya doin'?"
"Maybe it's true that time heals all wounds," Michi said. "But I don't want to wait. I want you to make me forget all about this." "H-How?" Chiyo asked. "Isn't it obvious?" Michi said. Then, she began to lean down, closer and closer, until her lips were about to touch Chiyo's.
"M-Mi-chan, wai-, hang on, stop, stop, stop!" the gal shouted, managing to slip her hands in between her face and Michi's at the last moment. "We… can't… not like this…" "...After everything you've done to me, this is where the line is?" Michi asked coldly. "I'm sorry, but… this isn't right, Mi-chan," Chiyo said. "I spent years fighting my problems with shit like what you're doing now. Trust me, it doesn't work, and if you try to press on anyways, all that's gonna come of it is a stupid amount of regret and self-loathing."
Finally, Michi got off Chiyo and sat back down calmly on the couch. "I thought maybe I'd try your way, but I guess it's not really your way anymore, is it?" "You're the one that made that change happen, Mi-chan," Chiyo pointed out. "And I'm grateful for that." Michi groaned. "Ugh, just what the hell was I trying to do?" In response, Chiyo giggled. "I guess being the aggressive one isn't your forte."
Unfortunately, the brief good mood achieved died out quickly, leaving both girls wondering what to do next. While the gal was playing it cool on the outside, inside she was a wreck. "W-Was Mi-chan seriously about to kiss me?! Like, for real, for real?! How?! Why?! Since when had we progressed this far?!" And next to her, Michi wasn't as confused, but even she didn't quite understand why she tried that approach. "'Try your way?' Why would I even say something like that? Getting on top of her like that was bad enough, but then I tried to cover it up by bringing up Chiyo's past behavior? God, what is going on with me right now?"
In an effort to bring things back on track, Michi circled back to her original question. "So, what are we, Chiyo?" "I guess… we can just say friends…" Chiyo said quietly, though she sounded a bit bitter to say it. "Friends…" Michi repeated, the word tasting bad in her mouth. "For now," Chiyo suddenly added, causing Michi to look up at her, startled. "What do you…?"
Chiyo looked at her, giving a small smile. "Until we both feel like things are back to normal." "Back to normal…" Michi said. "Do we even have a normal?" "Maybe we do, maybe we don't. But for now, let's just work on our friendship, and we'll let time take care of the rest. Even though it totes sucks to wait." "...Okay," Michi agreed, giving a slight nod.
"Well, I guess I should probably go now," Chiyo said, standing up. "Go?" Michi asked, sounding sad. Chiyo froze from hearing that tone. "Mi-chan, c'mon…" "Sorry… you're right…" Michi said. "We both should probably have some alone time right now…"
Reaching out, Chiyo brought her hand to Michi's face. "Can I?" she asked softly. To answer her, Michi simply closed her eyes, allowing Chiyo to place her hand on the girl's cheek. "I promise, one day…" But even in the quiet of the apartment, Michi couldn't make out the rest of what Chiyo said. However, she also didn't ask. She kept her eyes shut, listening as the gal walked away and opened the door, then closed it behind her.
*****
"If you're out here, that better mean things are taken care of," Chitose said sternly. "Yeah, they are," Chiyo said. "Although, I'm pretty sure our relationship's gonna be kinda weird for a while…" "After what happened, I don't know how it couldn't be," Chitose said, but then she clapped her hands. "Alright, mission accomplished, I guess. Let's go home."
Getting back in the car, Chiyo stared back up at Michi's apartment. She couldn't help but replay the conversation in her head. While several questions had been answered, several more had popped up to take their places. Then there was the biggest one of all. "I wonder… what our future is gonna look like from now on?"
*****
In the quiet of the apartment, Michi remained slumped on the couch. "...I think I'm still just as confused about our relationship as I was before…" she muttered. Her mind went back to only a few minutes ago when Chiyo had spoken to her softly. "I couldn't hear the rest of what she was saying… It kind of feels like she spoke that softly on purpose, like she didn't actually want me to hear…"
That in its own way was frustrating too, causing Michi to sigh. "Why do things always have to be so complicated between us…" she thought. Although, perhaps not everything was complicated. Michi had been mad at Chiyo for what she did with Katsumi, but after having a talk, it was like those feelings didn't even matter anymore. That wasn't to say Michi was entirely unbothered, but it was as if the gal's presence had been enough to overwrite most of her anger.
Still, there was still the issue of some rebuilding being necessary. "Normal…" Michi repeated once more. "But what does that even mean? And how will we know when we're there? What if… we never know…"
With many questions abounding, all Michi could do was work on her own feelings as she waited for time to pass.
*****
The second term at Iwanai Municipal High School was officially underway as summer break came to an end. Naturally, it was met with the numerous groans of students and teachers alike, though the amount was far less among the third-year students. That mostly had to do with the fact that there were far fewer of them than the other years. With more and more attendance quotas being met each day and entrance exams drawing ever closer, the classrooms for third-years were getting quite empty.
But, among those still attending was Chiyo. With hair up and clothes worn the way she wanted them, her appearance fit like usual. Her face, however, was the exact opposite. Having failed to get much sleep over the last several nights thanks to her constant thinking about Michi, the bags under her eyes were visibly showing, and she had a noticeable lack of energy.
"Yo girl, you look like a zombie," Jasmine commented upon seeing her walk into the classroom. "Yeah, thanks… " Chiyo grumbled. Her mood wasn't great, but when she saw Michi, it changed quite a bit. It didn't quite go into full-energy mode, but there was more oomph to her movements and words.
"Mornin' Mi-chan!" Chiyo said, doing her best to muster up enthusiasm. "...Good morning," Michi said back. It was a normal exchange between them, and yet… it wasn't quite right. The forced energy from Chiyo. The uncertainty in Michi's response. The conversation dying right after their greeting. All of it was evidence of the current awkwardness between them. Perhaps the average person wouldn't have noticed, but for those who witnessed the two girls' interactions on a near-daily basis, it was an odd sight to see. Each one almost wished to voice their concern, but they all agreed to hold back. This was Chiyo and Michi's problem, and as demonstrated by the gal herself, no good would come of trying to force things when they probably shouldn't.
Class went on as usual, and when lunch came around, the big group that usually went up to the roof did just that. However, sitting in their circle certainly made Chiyo and Michi's awkwardness more obvious. Not only were they sitting farther apart from each other, there were also practically no flirtatious interactions between the two. While it may have annoyed some to see them like that, not seeing it at all was an even more bizarre sight.
"Hey, what's up with Chiyo and Mi-chan?" Itsuki asked in a whisper to Jasmine. "I'd explain it, but like, I don't think you'd get it," the gal said back. "I'm not that stupid!" Itsuki whisper-yelled. "Even I can tell something's going on!" "Good job. A star for you," Jasmine said back, unimpressed. "Mmngh… Such a mean big sister…" Itsuki pouted. "I don't recall ever accepting that role in the first place," Jasmine said.
"What're you two whisperin' about?" Chiyo asked. Immediately, Itsuki opened her mouth to ask the questions she had, but Jasmine slapped her hand right over it. "Nothing. Don't worry 'bout it." "That's suspicious, Jas-chin," Chiyo said, narrowing her eyes. "Whatcha hidin'?" "If I was hiding something, do ya really think I'd tell ya?" Jasmine reasoned. "And really, all I'm doin' is sparing us from Itsuki-chan's idiocy." "MMM, MMM, MMM!" Itsuki cried in muffled sounds. "Well, whatevs, I guess," Chiyo said with a shrug, deciding that was a good enough excuse.
The rest of lunch passed with some more conversation, though Chiyo and Michi speaking directly to each other was sparse. When lunch ended, they packed up and walked back together, but it definitely wasn't as intimate as it had been in the past. While nearly everybody in the group understood what was going on, it didn't really make it any less of a strange sight.
Unfortunately, as time went on, not much changed between them. Several weeks went by, and while they managed some amount of a friendship, it was hard to say if the two girls were really trying to achieve anything else beyond that. Unlike before, where it was like they were one step away from a relationship, now Chiyo and Michi seemed like they had reverted back to the "feeling each other out" stage.
To those aware, it caused worry in some, but others just shrugged, figuring that was just how it goes. Considering they were nearing the end of high school, it almost seemed natural that a relationship that never quite made sense in the first place would fall apart as their time together neared. However, despite that, it was also easy to believe in and hope that Chiyo and Michi would figure it out, as there was something comforting about seeing two people so different get along so well.
*****
The final days of summer soon gave way to the cooler days of fall, and with that, the time to do autumn-related things had come. The crisp, cool air breezed through the town, further reinforcing the changing of seasons. Being as far north as they were, wearing long sleeves and perhaps a scarf had already become regular attire for some.
"Haaah," Chiyo sighed, staring out the window of the cafe as she watched the slowly changing leaves rustle in the wind. "Would ya stop sighing like that? I'm gonna like, catch your depression or something," Jasmine complained, sitting across from her. Currently, the two gals were sitting in a booth at Cafe Mori, the late afternoon hours leading into the upcoming dinner rush.
"I can't help it," Chiyo whined. "This is the perfect time of year to start doing coupley stuff, and instead, I'm stuck in some weird, ambiguous relationship limbo!" "And who's fault do you think that is?" Jasmine said bluntly. "Ugh…" Chiyo groaned. "I know that it's mine, but we're trying to move past that! There's gotta be somethin' me and Mi-chan can do together to help mend some fences!"
"Y'know, if you're looking for advice on couple activities, then maybe you should be asking Haru-chi or Kana-chan," Jasmine said. "Huh? Jas-chin, you've been in like, a thousand relationships, right?" Chiyo asked, earning herself a kick to the shin. "Ow!" "It wasn't a thousand, idiot," Jasmine said, annoyed. "And besides, just because I did stuff like that doesn't mean I committed it to memory. Honestly, most of what I remember from my relationships was how the sex was." "That's awful, Jas-chin…" Chiyo said. "Like you're one to talk," the other gal shot back.
"Well putting that aside," Chiyo said. "I don't really wanna ask them…" "Why not?" Jasmine asked. "I… kinda wanna figure it out myself…" Chiyo mumbled. "If you say so," Jasmine said with a shrug. "I guess they're busy today anyways. Didn't Haru-chi say something at lunch today about goin' to a show or something?" "Kana-chan was taking her to a special performance somewhere in town," Chiyo clarified. "Not sure what it was about though…"
"Maybe you can take Fukuhara-san to something like that?" Jasmine suggested, but Chiyo shook her head. "No way," the gal said. "First off, I'd be the one who'd end up bored, and that's no good. Second, I don't think Mi-chan's the kinda girl to go to stuff like that." "Is Kana-chan?" Jasmine asked. "It sounded like she had a reason for going. Something about cooking stuff, I think," Chiyo said.
The gal flopped down on the table, arms splayed out ahead of her. "This is so unfair…" she grumbled. "Kana-chan and Haru-chi get to go out and do fun stuff while I'm stuck guessing. Even you have Mayu-chan, Jas-chin." "I-I wouldn't say I have her or anythin'..." the other gal sputtered, then cleared her throat. "Look, instead of complaining to me about it, why don't ya actually make an effort to figure somethin' out? It's not like sittin' here is doin' ya any good."
"...But what can I even do?" Chiyo mumbled. "No matter what I try, she'll-" But before Chiyo could finish her sentence, Jasmine chopped her on the head. "Enough of the pity party, girl. Just do something." At that time, Sara came over too, catching some of their conversation. "If you're lookin' for somethin' to do, it is just about harvest time," she said. "Why don't ya go pick some fruit and veggies?"
For a moment, Chiyo just stared at the woman. After another few seconds, the idea seemed to sink in, as Chiyo immediately sat up. "That's it!" she exclaimed. "It's the perfect opportunity too! It's not like me and Mi-chan gotta be right next to each other the whole time, so it's a good way for us to start closing that distance again." "Glad I could help," Sara said with a smile before walking away to another table.
"Hey, Jas-chin, I'm gonna-" "Yeah, yeah," Jasmine said with a wave. "Go do what ya gotta do." "Thanks Jas-chin!" Chiyo said, quickly dashing for the door. "...Ah, damn it," Jasmine said as the other gal left. "She totally just stuck me with her side of the bill… She's definitely buying next time."
*****
When Michi had heard frantic knocking at her door, she had rushed toward it, expecting something bad. However, when she not only saw Chiyo on the other side, but she also suggested they go pick fruit, she was stunned into silence for a moment. "...You want to do what?" Michi eventually said. "Fruit picking!" Chiyo repeated excitedly. "Doesn't that sound fun, Mi-chan?" "Not really," Michi answered simply. "Who wants to stand out in a field all day picking things off trees and bushes?" "It's not like it's gotta be all day. We could just go for a couple of hours," Chiyo said, trying to make her case. "That still sounds like something I don't want to do," Michi said back.
"Oh…" Chiyo said, sounding disappointed. "It's just, I thought… maybe it'd be good for us… since we're still trying to like, figure out how to navigate our friendship and stuff…" Hearing that, Michi could only look away. "And how would… picking fruit help with that?" "I thought it would help with our distance problem…" Chiyo explained. "It's better than going to see a movie or going out to a store or something, isn't it?"
Michi was inclined to agree. Any activity that involved Chiyo was bound to feel awkward, and if said activity was one that they needed to be near each other all the time, the awkwardness would only get worse. When put that way, going out into a large field and doing a task that could be done independently was the most ideal. This way, they could still technically spend time together without having to interact much. For as awkward as things had become between the two of them, Michi still wanted to be able to spend time with Chiyo.
"...Alright," she agreed. "When should we go?" "How about this weekend?" Chiyo suggested. "Works for me," Michi said. "You know, you could've just called me to ask me about this. You didn't need to come here." "Ah," Chiyo let out. "Yeah, I guess you're right. My legs just sorta carried me here, y'know? Like, I thought of the idea, and then before I knew it, I was rushing over here."
Michi could feel her face heat up as she heard Chiyo's feelings through her words. Immediately, all of the mixed feelings Michi had yet to sort out rushed up to the surface, making her even more aware of Chiyo. "Ugh…" she groaned internally. "Why does everything have to be so complicated when it comes to her?" For every feeling that told her to joyously leap at the opportunity to spend time together, there was another one that told her she should keep her distance. While perhaps one side outweighed the other, it didn't change the fact that a battle still raged, one that may only be resolved with the passage of time after all. It pained Michi to admit such a thing, especially when she wished time itself could move faster, though of course, it would not.
"Mi-chan, you alright? Ya look a lil' pale," Chiyo said, getting a little closer. "I-I'm fine," Michi said, trying to cover for herself. "Let's just plan for Saturday, okay?" "Alright…" Chiyo said, still sounding concerned. "To be honest, I really don't know where to go to pick fruit." "I suppose we'll both have to look into it, because I don't know either," Michi said.
After another minute of working out the transportation issues, Chiyo decided to leave. As she did, she turned back toward Michi and smiled. "I'm… looking forward to Saturday." "...Right…" was all Michi could manage to say back. Then the gal turned away and left, leaving a troubled Michi behind.
"Will this really be okay?" she wondered. "We've hardly spent any time alone together ever since that incident… But it's not like we've never been alone together… But now it feels so different… haaah… Seriously, why did things have to turn out this way…"
*****
By the time Saturday came around, Michi's heart was still a tangled web of emotions. Really, there was little she could do about it other than move forward, but it certainly made her current situation more uncomfortable than she would've liked. Riding in the car her driver would use, it felt like there was tension going so many ways it was impossible to relax.
For Michi, it was her unsorted feelings and how to act with Chiyo now. For the gal seated next to her, it was mostly the same, though most likely some guilt was still mixed in there too. And then there was the driver himself, who constantly found the need to report back to Michi's parents about the happenings in her life that he witnessed. The last thing Michi wanted was a call from either her mother or father asking her about what was going on between her and Chiyo.
Taking a glance at Chiyo, she saw the gal was just staring out the window. However, as if she had a sixth sense, she turned just as Michi began to stare. Their eyes met, but Michi quickly looked away, unable to hold Chiyo's gaze. Her heart raced as her complex emotions welled up once more, and Michi's face contorted, almost as if she was in pain.
"...Mi-chan," Chiyo suddenly said, getting the girl's attention. "If this is too hard for you… we can do this some other time." Realizing Chiyo had still been watching her, Michi began to feel embarrassed. "It's not too hard," she said quickly. "I just… don't know how to act right now…"
Chiyo was quiet for a moment. "...If that's the case…" she said softly. "Then what if we held hands?" "And how is that supposed to help?" Michi asked, skeptical. "Well, it'll at least like, calm your nerves… and mine too…" Chiyo said even softer.
"She's nervous too…" Michi thought. Perhaps it was obvious now that it had been said out loud, but Michi hadn't been thinking about that at all. "Of course this isn't easy for Chiyo either. And it's not like I've been doing her any favors by being so insistent on trying to figure out what we're doing…" A small amount of guilt began to rise in MIchi. Was she right to just say no and remain steadfast on wanting to have some distance due to their uncertainties? Or, was it better to take Chiyo's hand and see what would happen?
Before she could give it much more thought, she found her left hand lifting up and turning over, preparing to welcome another hand into itself. Seeing that, Chiyo did her best to hide her surprise at Michi's agreement and simply slid her hand into place. Gently, their fingers interlocked and their palms connected, creating warmth that wasn't there before.
Inside, Michi's heart leapt, but unlike only moments before, it felt so clear. It was just a reaction of happiness, nothing more, to feel Chiyo's hand in hers. Though the moment was brief, Michi still enjoyed it, smiling slightly as she got a short second of peace.
Chiyo, sitting next to her, noticed Michi's expression, but she said nothing. She didn't want to say anything, out of fear that even a tiny mention of what was happening would be enough to destroy this small amount of progress they had just made. "All that matters is that Mi-chan is letting me do this much," Chiyo told herself.
The drive to the place they were going to wasn't long, but for the rest of the way, the two girls held hands, each of them getting something out of it that helped them breathe a little easier.
*****
"Now, you're gonna wanna be careful when ya pick these, because they can be delicate," a lady explained. Dressed in a forest green t-shirt and navy blue overalls, she looked every bit the type of woman you'd expected to find at a fruit patch. Her brown hair was also tied up in a bun, and she appeared to be somewhere in her 40s. When Chiyo and Michi had arrived, they had pulled up to a small, but pleasant looking building that was decorated to appear very nature-y. A few others had been inside waiting, and it was only a few minutes after that that the woman currently before them showed up and began guiding them.
The property itself was huge, housing all sorts of fruits and vegetables. For this group in particular though, they would be picking apples, pears and grapes if they wanted. At the moment, the fruit being described as delicate was the grapes, as the lady was bent down to demonstrate. "Ya wanna just grab 'em gently, then give a lil' tug. They'll pop off and you can put 'em in the buckets ya got. Just make sure ya keep anything ya pick separate. Shouldn't be too hard since apples, pears and grapes all look pretty different."
Her explanations were fairly cut and dry, but she spoke in a kind tone. With such easy directions to follow, everyone in the group was in good spirits. Even Michi seemed a little excited. She glanced down at the bucket in her hands, smiling.
"Ready to go?" Chiyo asked. "H-Huh?" Michi let out. Chiyo pointed out toward the fields of trees and bushes. "Everybody else is already picking. We better hurry if we wanna get the good ones." "I don't know if that really matters," Michi said, but she started following along after Chiyo as the gal headed straight for one of the apple trees.
"Wow…" Chiyo said in awe as she looked up. "Look at how red those are Mi-chan!" "Are they supposed to be that red?" Michi asked. "Yeah, they're apples," Chiyo said matter-of-factly. "You do know that not every apple is red, right?" Michi asked in a more lecturing tone. "Of course I know that!" Chiyo exclaimed. "Geez, even little kids know that much! They're green ones, red ones, and yellow ones!" "Good job," Michi said, reaching up to pat Chiyo's head. However, she froze.
"Ah…" she let out. Immediately, her hand dropped as she realized she had gotten caught up in the flow. Michi was also about to get caught up in thinking when she noticed Chiyo pouting. "Uhm…?" was all she could manage. "Mrngh…" the gal grumbled. "I got the damn question right, so like, give me my head pat!" "U-Uh, okay…" Michi said, somewhat surprised to see Chiyo demanding one. Reaching up (and needing to stand on her tiptoes a bit), she placed her hand on top of Chiyo's head and rubbed it a few times.
"H-How's this?" Michi asked. "Bliss," the gal said with a smile. "W-We should get back to picking fruits," Michi said, trying to ignore all of her feelings. "Booo," the gal whined. "What do you mean, boo? This was your idea!" Michi yelled. "Yeah, but like, headpats are way better than manual labor." "I'm not going to just stand her and pat your head all day!" Michi shouted. Her loud voice happened to draw the attention of someone nearby, giving her an odd look. Catching it, Michi blushed out of embarrassment.
"Ugh! You cause me nothing but trouble!" Michi huffed as she marched up toward the apple tree. She raised her hand, but unfortunately, it turned out that she was far too short to pick them while standing on the ground. "Mmnnnngh…!" she groaned, but no matter how much she stretched, there was no reaching the apples.
"Pfft!" Chiyo snorted. "M-Mi-chan, ya want *snrt*... ya want some help?" "Shut up Chiyo!" Michi fired back as she kept trying to reach. "Well like, I guess you're *pffft* a-almost… there…" the gal said, desperately trying not to burst out laughing.
Of course, Michi couldn't get even a single apple. Spotting one nearby, Chiyo walked over and grabbed it, plucking it off the branch. "This looks like a good one," she thought, then shouted, "Hey, Mi-chan!" "What do you want, Chiyo? Can't you see I'm…mnngh! busy?" "Look," Chiyo said, walking back over to the girl. Holding out her hand, she presented a perfectly red apple to Michi. "Just for you."
"This feels like it's being given to me out of pity," Michi pouted. "I don't want it." "C'mon, just take it," Chiyo insisted. "Or did you wanna try a bite? Here, say ahhh." Michi stared, suddenly unsure of how to proceed. Perhaps before, something like this would've been almost normal being the two of them. But now… "Um…" Michi let out. That was enough for Chiyo to realize her mistake. "Oh… right… Yeah, I guess that would be a little much now, huh? Haha, sorry about that…"
Though she said that, the look on Chiyo's face pained Michi's heart. "...I-I never said I didn't want it," she mumbled. "Eh?" the gal let out, then quickly scrambled to bring the apple back up. "T-Then here." Having the fruit right in front of her mouth, Michi opened and brought her teeth down on it. It took a little bit of force, but she managed to get a whole bite.
"How is it?" Chiyo asked. "It's good…" Michi said after swallowing. "You can tell they're grown right." "Can you? Lemme see," Chiyo said, bringing the apple up to her own mouth. Then she took a bite… in the exact same spot as Michi. "Mm, yeah, that is pretty good," she said with a teasing glance pointed toward Michi. Immediately, the girl's face turned as red as the fruit surrounding her. "Y-You-! That was on purpose!" "Hm? What was?" Chiyo said in a teasing tone. "I need ya to be more specific."
But, instead of speaking more, Michi did something Chiyo didn't expect. She snatched the apple out of the gal's hand, then proceeded to take another bite overlapping the first two. "I-I can do it too, you know…" she said, looking shy and flustered. It took everything in Chiyo's power to not blurt out the words cute or adorable. Although, thanks to that, it made the gal realize how smoothly things were going.
Just like Michi, she had thought that this trip would ultimately just be an awkward experience for both of them. And yet, they were getting along perfectly fine other than a hiccup here or there. "Maybe… all this natural interaction is helping to overwrite Michi's bad feelings… or something like that," Chiyo thought. "I hope that's the case. Because if it is, then all I gotta do is keep doing things like this with her, and then…"
She didn't want to allow herself to get too optimistic, so Chiyo stopped her train of thought there. Instead, she simply continued picking apples, and then pears. Thanks to her struggles, Michi ended up getting a stepstool to use so she could reach the branches. It wouldn't have been so bad for her if it wasn't for the fact that there was a child nearby also using one. Unable to endure that embarrassment for long, Michi soon ended up going over to the grapes, which were much more accessible.
By the time they finished, Chiyo and Michi had quite the haul of fruit. Due to business rules, they weren't allowed to take all of it with them, but they could take some. "This is probably better anyways," Michi said as they walked away, each of them holding a small, lidded container filled with fruit. "There's no way I would've been able to eat all of that before it started going bad." "Yeah, same here," Chiyo said. "Big sis isn't really big on fruit either, so it would've just been up to me."
Reaching the car they had called (Michi refused to have her driver wait, so she had sent him away), the two of them got in. Once Chiyo gave the driver the address, he began going the direction he needed to, and the two girls in the back sat quietly as he drove along.
The first stop was Michi's apartment, but Chiyo ended up getting out as well. "Huh? Why are you following me?" Michi asked. "I just thought I'd walk," the gal said as she sent the car on its way. However, Michi wasn't buying that excuse. "What's the real reason?" she asked. Chiyo was smiling, but it soon fell as her unease showed.
"M-Mi-chan…" she said nervously. "Um, did you… did ya have fun today?" "...I guess so," Michi said. She had also noticed earlier how well they had been getting along, but just like Chiyo, she had said nothing due to fear. "Do you think…" the gal began. "That we're getting closer again?"
That was the question neither of them wanted to ask. In particular, Michi really hadn't wanted to hear it from Chiyo, because the only answer she could offer was, "...I don't know." Honestly, it felt like it was a step in the right direction, but Michi also felt like she had been swept up in the moment. When left alone to her thoughts, would she still feel like they had made any progress? Or would that feeling vanish, leaving her with nothing but the doubts and uncertainties she fostered about her future with Chiyo?
"Hey, Mi-chan," Chiyo said, bringing Michi back to reality. "Thanks for agreeing to do this with me." "...Sure…" was all Michi could manage to say. Just as it had begun so awkwardly, so too did it end, with Chiyo giving a small wave and Michi returning it before the gal started to walk off. Soon enough, she was out of sight, leaving Michi to climb the stairs up to her apartment alone.
Once she was inside, she set the fruit down on the kitchen countertop, then promptly flopped down on her couch. "...I don't know if I'm more or less confused now…" she muttered into the cushion. "Haah… Why are feelings so… stupidly hard…?"
End of Chapter Twenty-Six.
Author's Note: Apologies for the long delay. I've been somewhat busy and also procrastinating… Also, so readers know, there are only four chapters left. I know that seems fast pacing-wise, but I'll explain everything in the afterword for this volume.
-Saturnalia Blackrose