On the following Wednesday morning, Chiyo came over as planned. Having done this routine often enough now, Michi made sure to at least be awake and dressed by the time Chiyo showed up. As always, she got a cheery, "Mornin' Mi-chan!" which ran very opposite to Michi's mood that early in the day. Giving her usual "mm," back, Michi let the gal in.
While Michi continued to get ready, Chiyo went to work in the kitchen. It was her turn to make both of their lunches, and while she was at it, she figured she'd make breakfast too. That could be considered a lot for the average person, but Chiyo was actually pretty quick in the kitchen. It also helped that she felt extra motivated because she was cooking for Michi.
"Hey, Mi-chan," Chiyo called. "Ya want anything specific?" "...No, just make whatever," Michi eventually answered. Turning her attention back to the ingredients she had gathered in front of her, Chiyo thought for a moment before deciding. "Alright, that's what I'll go with," she said to no one. "Oh, and I think I'll make some rolled eggs too, with plenty of sugar. I know she loves those."
Through her cooking experiences with Michi, Chiyo had been getting to know all kinds of preferences that the girl had. For instance, she liked her rolled eggs really sweet, but she liked sour grapes over plain ones. They were just little details, but each one she learned made Chiyo really happy.
And, it wasn't as if the effort to learn more was one-sided either. Michi wanted to know more about Chiyo too, but… she found it to be somewhat awkward to just ask questions about the gal. "It's times like these that I wish I could be a little more honest…" Michi sighed internally as she finished tying her hair. "Maybe today I'll manage to ask her something…"
By the time Michi got out of the bathroom, she found that Chiyo had already finished making breakfast and was finishing up on their lunch boxes. "That was fast," Michi commented. "Well, we had some leftovers, so I used that, and then made a couple of new things," Chiyo said. However, Michi couldn't help but notice the gal's phrasing. "We…" she muttered back to herself. "She makes it sound like we live together or something…" But just the thought of that threatened to send Michi's mind into a tailspin, so she quickly put it in the back of her mind and went to sit down at the table.
Chiyo joined her soon after, and they both served up their plates of sausage and scrambled eggs, along with a small bowl of oatmeal. The two girls then gave their thanks, but as Michi went to take her first bite, she stopped. Looking across the table, she saw Chiyo as she was bringing a spoonful of oatmeal to her mouth. She blew on it lightly a few times, then used her free hand to brush back a lock of hair hanging loose by her mouth. Taking a bite, Chiyo seemed pleased by the taste, then happened to look up.
"Like something ya see, Mi-chan?" she said, noticing the girl staring at her. "Y-Yeah right," Michi said back, sounding a bit flustered. "I was just making sure you wouldn't burn yourself." "Oh yeah?" Chiyo said, her voice light. When Michi looked back at her face, she saw Chiyo had a gentle smile aimed right at her. Immediately, the heat in her cheeks rose, and Michi had to look away again.
Oddly enough, it was at that moment that a question came to Michi's mind. Eager to be able to change the subject, she asked it without a second thought.
"Have you ever thought about stopping being a gyaru?"
The question was so abrupt that it actually made both of them freeze. "Wait, what did I just ask?" Michi thought as she realized what had just happened. For a moment, she thought about taking it back, but then she decided not to. "I'm actually kind of curious what she'll say…"
"Stop being a gyaru, huh?" Chiyo repeated back. The way she said it made Michi wonder if it was something she had ever considered. "And if she has," Michi thought. "Then why?" Somehow, it seemed like asking this one question was opening a floodgate of curiosity for Michi.
"Y'know, ya should've seen the look on my parents' faces when I first came out of the bathroom with my hair dyed," Chiyo said. "It was like they had been frozen in ice or something." She laughed as she recalled the memory. "My big sis was pretty surprised too, but she just ended up shrugging it off." "Chitose really didn't care?" Michi asked. "Not really," Chiyo said.
Hearing about her hair suddenly made Michi think of another question. "Wait, then what color did your hair used to be?" "Hmm?" Chiyo hummed. "Ya wanna know?" "Not if you're going to make some game out of it," Michi said, slightly annoyed by Chiyo's tone. "Aw, c'mon, don't be like that Mi-chan. Just take a guess." "...Alright," Michi said. "Was it black?" For a moment, Chiyo's eyes went wide, but then she switched to a very pleased smile. "Yep," she said. "It was totes black, just like Haru-chi's."
"That's hard to imagine," Michi said. After all, she had only known Chiyo as a gal with gold and auburn hair. Picturing having something as plain as black hair was certainly a challenge. "I might have a pic. Hold on," Chiyo said, searching through her phone. "Oh, here's one! This was actually right before I dyed my hair. I wanted a before and after."
Hopping over to Michi's side of the table, Chiyo showed the girl her phone screen. Sure enough, there was a girl with straight black hair in the picture, but it looked nothing like Chiyo. "No dye, no earrings, no make-up…" Michi muttered as she made a list of differences. "Pretty crazy transformation, right?" Chiyo said with a grin.
"But why did you become a gyaru in the first place?" Michi asked, but as soon as she did, she wished she hadn't. Immediately, the smile from Chiyo's face morphed into a less believable one. "Ah…" she let out as she made her way back to her seat. After she sat down, it seemed like she couldn't look Michi in the eyes.
"I guess you could say… it wasn't for the best reasons…" Chiyo finally answered. That response though was enough for Michi. "It probably has to do with her past…" she thought. "But if that's the case…" Looking straight ahead, Michi called out to the gal across from her. "Chiyo, if looking like that reminds you of bad times then-"
"It doesn't," Chiyo said, cutting Michi off. She took a moment to compose herself, but when she faced Michi again, she seemed to be more like her usual self. "It's true that my appearance mostly resulted from the girls I hung out with, but it's not like it was against my will. Even if bad times are with it, there were good times too. Besides, I've really come to enjoy all of this stuff. The makeup, the accessories, the clothes. It's fun." Chiyo appeared to be telling the truth as far as Michi could tell. "Well, I guess if she's having fun, it's alright…" she thought.
"But, to answer your first question," Chiyo said, getting Michi's attention. "When I first moved up here, I thought about it." "...Really?" Michi said, somewhat surprised. Chiyo nodded. "Yup. I mean, this is far from Tokyo, y'know? In big cities, I might catch someone's eye, but they'll probably just keep walkin'. Here in Iwanai, it was like I became a local celebrity. I got stopped all the time by people to ask me all sorts of things." "Like if you were available?" Michi asked, sounding a little bitter. "Yeah," Chiyo admitted. "And at the time, well…" "I know," Michi said, not wanting to hear the rest of what Chiyo was implying.
It was quiet for a moment until Michi pressed the conversation forward. "If that was the case, then why stay like that?" "It was def a lot of attention," Chiyo said. "But it wasn't all bad either. A lot of older folks would give me free stuff, and every now and then someone would want me to model for them." "You've lived quite a life here already, I see," Michi commented, causing Chiyo to let out a small laugh. "Yeah, guess I have."
Another moment of silence fell between them before Chiyo was the next one to speak. "Hey, Mi-chan. Do you… want me to stop?"
If Michi had been asked this question a year ago, it would've been a resounding yes. Even six months ago, she probably wouldn't have minded. But now… Michi could only shyly look away as she spoke.
"No… I like… this way better…"
"Then I'll stay this way for as long as you want, Mi-chan."
"J-Just eat before the food gets cold!"
The two of them continued to eat breakfast, making light conversation as they did until it was finally time to go.
*****
Peace is an interesting notion. To countries, it can mean simply not being at war. To companies, it can mean smooth business operations. But to an individual, the variation of how one defines peace varies so widely. For some, it's all about good finances. For others, it's about finding a sort of inner peace. And for others still, peace can be found in the people around them.
Michi wasn't the kind of person to actively be looking for something like peace. If it was anything, perhaps calling it stagnation would be most accurate. That is, until recently. With the release of her desire to keep things the same, Michi was almost forced to look for her own peace in order to deal with the changes around her. But not having been one to look for such a thing, the question was, where could she find it?
This wasn't something that took up a lot of space in her mind, or even kept her attention. It was just there, a desire to find a refuge that she could take solace in. While she wasn't actively searching for it, it was on this morning that Michi realized she had already found it.
Chiyo was talking about something she had seen on the internet, and as Michi listened, she found herself taking everything in. The sights of the few others walking nearby. The sounds of the birds as they chirped here and there, along with the gentle rustling of leaves as a light breeze blew through. The sun, its heat bearing down, but far from overly so as it slowly came to warm the days.
Then there was the gal next to her. Her voice was loud, but it felt comforting to Michi's ears. Her looks stood out far more than anyone else's, but while Michi would insist it was obnoxious, she would actually hate it if Chiyo didn't look the way she did. The scent of her perfume, somewhere between strawberry and citrus, both seemed to excite and calm Michi.
Her golden and auburn hair.
Her brilliantly blue eyes.
Her glittering accessories.
Her smile.
Her laugh.
…her.
"My peace… is Chiyo…"
"...what?"
Immediately, Michi realized she had said her conclusion out loud. Looking over, she saw Chiyo had stopped dead in her tracks, an expression of shock on her face. "W-What… does that mean, Mi-chan?" she asked, her voice shaking.
Michi's natural reaction was to deny she said anything, but as she opened her mouth to do that, she stopped. "Why bother hiding it… when it's true?" she thought. So instead of making excuses or trying to pretend she hadn't said anything, Michi took a deep breath before finally looking Chiyo in the eye.
"I've been thinking about it," Michi said. "If I'm going to accept change, then I need something to calm my mind when things are hard. And… that's you, Chiyo."
Chiyo's hands quickly covered her face. "Y-You shouldn't… say things like that to me, Mi-chan," she said, her voice muffled. "Who knows how I'll interpret that…" "Huh? Aren't you the one who said I should be more honest?" Michi asked. "And why are you covering your face?" "N-No reason," Chiyo sputtered. "Oh, this is ridiculous," Michi huffed. Then she walked over and grabbed Chiyo's arms. "Why are you acting like some embarrassed-"
Thanks to the suddenness of her actions, Michi was able to overpower Chiyo. However, when she did, she saw Chiyo's face was a brilliant shade of red, and tears had formed at the corners of her eyes. "M-Mi-chan…" Chiyo whimpered. "D-Don't look…"
"Ah… s-sorry…" Michi said, letting Chiyo go and turning around. She didn't know how else to react to seeing that expression. "What's with that look? Does what I said really embarrass her that much?" she wondered. "I guess it would be a little embarrassing if someone said that to me, but shouldn't it just make you happy? Isn't what I said a compliment more than anything?"
"Mi-chan," Chiyo called. Hearing her name, Michi turned back around. It seemed like Chiyo had calmed down a little, though she still seemed flustered. "Can I… hug you?" she asked timidly. Being asked for something so intimate, it was now Michi's turn to feel embarrassed. Naturally, a part of her wanted to say no, but in the end, she simply went with, "...do whatever you want…"
Chiyo didn't waste a single second, lunging in and wrapping Michi up. Because of the height difference, Michi's face ended up buried in the gal's chest. While a small part of the girl admitted it was soft, a larger part just didn't want to be smothered. "C-Chiyo!" Michi cried. "Too tight!"
But, before Chiyo let up, she made sure to let out some of the words of her heart. "I'll be whatever you want me to be for you, Mi-chan," she said softly. "Your peace, your constant, your pillar… I want to be everything for you… Anything you need… let me be the one…"
Then Chiyo let Michi go. "C'mon, we should probably get to school. If we take any longer, we might end up being late." The gal then began to walk ahead, not realizing what she was leaving behind.
While Michi had been protesting, she had noticed that Chiyo had started talking. She didn't catch every word, but she did catch one part. Feeling her cheeks get hot, all Michi could think about were the words she had just heard. "'I want to be everything for you…' 'let me be the one…' …What the hell does that even mean…?"
*****
The rest of the morning proceeded as it had for the last several weeks. Katsumi kept bothering Kanako, Haruna and Chiyo kept getting in her way, and the rest of the class simply watched on. At first, quite a few people had been concerned with Katsumi's behavior, but at this point, it had all become so regular that most people didn't think about it that much anymore.
However, Michi was not one of those people. She watched closely, though it probably wasn't for the same reasons as anybody else might. Michi kept her eyes on Chiyo, making sure she didn't do anything with Katsumi. "I know she wouldn't, but…" she thought. "There's just something about Chiyo being near that girl that makes me feel… uneasy…"
And, while Michi felt that way, she couldn't help but also notice Kanako. The girl was just sitting in her seat, a look of complete disinterest on her face as Katsumi kept trying to get her attention. "I guess their relationship has changed too…" she thought. But as she continued to look over at the group, another question came to mind. "I wonder… if Kana-chan has been feeling anxious ever since Ikehara-san came around…"
Katsumi was a direct threat to Kanako's relationship with Haruna. Even if Michi didn't approve of Kanako's relationship, she could still understand the anxiety one might get if someone else showed up and started causing trouble. "Then again, Kana-chan's always had a strong belief in love. Maybe it hasn't actually bothered her that much…" Giving that some thought, Michi let out a small sigh. "I wish… I was a little more like her…"
*****
When lunchtime came around, Michi grabbed her things and turned to Chiyo. "To the roof, right?" she asked. Unfortunately, Chiyo shook her head. "Sorry, Mi-chan," the gal said. "I've got something I've gotta do." "Huh? What?" Michi asked. Chiyo sighed. "Apparently I have to talk to a teacher about my career slip. Something about writing 'musician' isn't good enough." "Oh," Michi said. "Then maybe you should play them a song to change their mind." "Haha, yeah, maybe I should!" Chiyo laughed. "But yeah, that's why we can't eat together today. Sorry Mi-chan."
"It's fine. It's not like I've never eaten by myself before."
"You could eat with Kana-chan and Haru-chi."
"That… might be too awkward… for me to handle alone…"
"Ah, right…"
The mood between them got a little weird, so in an effort to fix it, Chiyo leaned down to Michi. "I'll try to be quick, okay? Then maybe we can have a little time together." "D-Don't say it like that…" Michi said in a huff. With that, Chiyo left, and soon after, Michi followed suit, though she went a different direction.
When it came to choosing a spot to eat, there weren't a lot of good options. The roof was always popular, and of course the cafeteria was packed every day. One's own classroom was decent, but if you were eating alone, you drew a lot of attention. That left places like staircases and hallways, but using one of those spots meant you might be in the way of other people. So, after sifting through all of her options, Michi landed on a dead-end hall with a window at the end. It was a little out of the way, though if she stayed long enough, she'd see people coming around to use the rooms nearby.
Sitting under the window, Michi began eating. "Rolled eggs!" she exclaimed without meaning to as she opened her lunch. Picking one up in her excitement, she took a bite. "And they're really sweet too. Geez, Chiyo really can cook, can't she?" Although, as soon as those words left her mouth, Michi noticed how she was acting. Immediately, she got red in the face. "If Chiyo heard me say any of that, I'd never hear the end of it…" she mumbled to herself.
Michi continued eating, and about halfway through lunch she heard someone coming. "I didn't think anybody would come by at this time," she thought. "Great. This is going to be awkward…" She began to brace for questions about why she was eating where she was, but instead, the person coming stopped right in front of her.
"Fukuhara-san?" a lower voice said. Blinking a couple times, Michi realized it was Jasmine. "Hiraoka-san?" she said. "What are you doing here?" "Shouldn't that like, be my question?" Jasmine asked, but then she shrugged. "I was just lookin' for Itsuki-chan. She ran off to get something but hasn't come back." "Right, she does that sometimes. It usually just means she got distracted," Michi said.
Silence formed between the two of them, and Michi found herself wishing a random stranger had appeared instead. "This is so awkward…" she thought. "I never talk to Hiraoka-san. I just don't know how to handle her. Sure, she and Chiyo are both gyarus, but she's… different somehow. It's like a different vibe than Chiyo's…" Honestly, Michi just wanted Jasmine to move on, but to her great surprise, the other gal took a seat right next to her.
"Um…" Michi let out. "Did you… need something from me, Hiraoka-san?" However, instead of answering, Jasmine just stared, her drooping eyes feeling like they were piercing Michi. "So why ya eatin' alone, Fukuhara-san?" Jasmine suddenly asked. "Oh, uh, Chiyo had something to do, so…" Michi answered. "I see," Jasmine said simply, giving way to silence once more.
"Ugh!" Michi groaned internally. "Just leave already! Why did she even sit down? We don't have anything to talk about, do we?"
"Hey," Jasmine said. "So, I was wonderin'. Do you still like, hate Haru-chi's relationship with Kana-chan?" Now it was Michi's turn to stare, though her gaze soon shifted back to looking straight ahead. It was another sudden question, but not one that was unfamiliar to Michi. "I'm not sure… if hate is the right word anymore…" Michi said quietly. "But I can't say I approve." "Even though you and Chiyo aren't so different?"
Michi froze at Jasmine's question. "W-What's… that supposed to m-mean…?" she managed to ask. Jasmine sighed. "I'm not gonna spell it out for you Fukuhara-san. If I did, you'd probably never learn, not to mention I'd probably never hear the end of it from Chiyo. But… I'm sure you know the saying, 'the pot calling the kettle black,' right?"
To be honest, Michi had never made the comparison. "Is my relationship similar to Kana-chan's?" Michi wondered. "No way. She's in… love… with Endo-san. They're a couple, whether I like it or not. How could Chiyo and I be similar at all? We're just friends."
Just friends. Those words triggered Michi's memory, causing her to recall the day she spoke with Chiyo to repair their relationship. She had said something quite similar to Chiyo then, too, and the gal's reaction had been less than what Michi had been expecting. It was as if calling Chiyo a friend was something painful to hear. "But why?" Michi wondered. "We are friends… we… are…"
Or… were they?
Teasing. The back and forth. Growing closer. Vulnerability. Quiet times. Everything in between all of that, and now the current mornings Michi shared with Chiyo. Was that really… friendship, and friendship alone? Michi's friendship with Kanako hadn't been nearly that close, let alone with Mayu or Itsuki. So then what did that make them? Friends was the only word coming to mind, but it felt like the more Michi thought about it, the less it fit.
While she thought, Jasmine kept staring at her, until eventually, she got up, then offered a hand to Michi. "C'mon," she said. "...And where do you plan on taking me?" Michi asked warily. "To my bedroom, to ravish you," Jasmine teased, which got her a frown from Michi. "C'mon, you don't really think I'd do that, do you? Besides, you're not my type." Though it shouldn't have bothered her, Michi found herself to be a little irritated to hear someone's disinterest in her put so bluntly. "Oh yeah? And who is your type then? Anybody but me?" she shot back. "Nah," Jasmine said with a smirk. "I think… I've got a thing for the calm, studious types." If Michi gave that some thought, she probably could've figured out who Jasmine was talking about, but she decided it wasn't worth her time and moved on.
"So? Where are we going?" she asked again. "I just wanna show ya somethin'." Jasmine said. Then she started walking away, and out of curiosity, Michi followed. After only a turn or two, she guessed that they were heading toward the roof. "But why there? I think the only people I'd know up there are Kana-chan and Endo-san."
Sure enough, when they reached the roof, Michi saw the two girls pleasantly enjoying each other's company. She and Jasmine were watching them through a crack in the door, though Michi wondered why. "What are we doing, Hiraoka-san?" she asked. "I want ya to take a real good look at those two," Jasmine whispered. "And what am I supposed to be looking for?" Michi asked. "Just look," Jasmine insisted. Michi was a little annoyed by the non-answers, but she tried anyway. She stared and stared, but she found nothing.
"Honestly, what's even the point of this?" Michi asked. "All Kana-chan and Endo-san are doing is talking. But, I guess they do seem to be having fun… and Kana-chan… looks pretty happy…ah…." Whether or not this was what Jasmine wanted Michi to see, Michi didn't know, but she did learn one thing. "She's happy," she thought. "Kana-chan… is happy…"
It wasn't quite acceptance. Nor was it a huge revelation. It was simply an understanding that had taken Michi far too long to reach. Kanako, a girl she once called her best friend, was happy in her relationship with this other girl. When it came down to it, that was a good thing, because that was what people always wanted for those they cared about. To be happy.
Unable to look any longer, Michi pulled away from the door. Seeing that, Jasmine did so as well, shutting the door in front of her. "...What was the point of that?" Michi eventually muttered as she tried to deal with the flurry of emotions welling up inside her.. "I don't know," Jasmine said. "Maybe a certain gal has rubbed off on me too much and I've gotten to be a lil' nosy. But… I also think you know what the point was."
"Now it's my turn to ask a question. Tell me somethin', Fukuhara-san. Just how long are you gonna torture yourself and Chiyo?"
Michi was silent, but whether that was by choice or because she didn't know how to answer, Jasmine wasn't sure. Then, Michi leaned up against the wall along the landing of the stairs, but she kept her eyes glued to the ground. "I don't know what you mean…" she said, barely audible. Hearing that, Jasmine shrugged. "Well, if ya don't, ya don't. Guess I'll see ya around, Fukuhara-san." And with that, Jasmine left.
Michi stayed in the same position she was in. Something about what Jasmine had said had triggered the smaller part of Michi that usually didn't get to have its voice heard. But, thanks to the gal's words, it was that voice that slipped out from Michi's lips.
"I'm such a liar," she muttered. "Of course I know what she means…"
End of Chapter Twelve.