ZhouHan and the elder spoke elsewhere as I wasn't allowed to hear the rest. They just told me to enhance my core and walked off, so I head towards the hunting grounds and sat in the same spot meditating. Hours later I opened my eyes hoping my sight would turn back to normal, but it didn't. When will I be able to see normally again?
In the corner of my eyes, I could see a gray aura hiding up in the trees quite far away. Was it Raiya? But why would he be watching me? I've also noticed that the palace is quite empty. I haven't seen anyone around since I got here. I sighed bored out of my mind. I should just focus on enhancing my core, but I don't even know if it's working.
Suddenly the gray aura that was far away, was standing right in front of me. He surprised me almost making me jump.
"Yes?" I questioned, but he didn't answer. Instead he sat next to me and meditated as well. I could see some sort of energy encircling around his core located in his heart filling up his entire body and then outside of it as well. It was like a vast whirlpool.
I suddenly felt motivated to keep enhancing, but the size of my spiritual energy intake was considerably smaller than his. I concentrated for a long time until the figure sitting next to me fell over into my lap. His breathing was stable and deep. Did he fall alseep? I held back a chuckle. I've never seen Raiya sleep before, sadly I couldn't see properly right now.
As he laid on me, I just focused on enhancing my core, but he kept tossing and turning. I gently pat his head and he holds onto my waist. I wondered what he was dreaming about to make him toss and turn this much. It wasn't until several minutes later that he suddenly woke up pushing me over along with him. His aura spiked up as if it was shocked and then he ran off.
Since it was getting late, so I turned in for the night. The following day, he followed me from afar and everyday after that as well. Whenever I went to enhance my core, he would sit next to me and fall alseep in my lap. Then one night he came into my room and slept next to me as he hugged me. The feeling of him embracing me made me feel warm and safe.
The next morning he woke up startled and knocked over several things as he quickly left the room. I couldn't help, but laugh. After that night, he kept his distance. Then several days later he came into my room again. This time he sat at the edge of bed and kissed my hand before placing a kiss on my forehead. Then he left and kept his distance again.
I still don't understand him. He has all sorts of sides to him. Sometimes he's mean and sometimes he's nice to me.
After weeks of enhancing my core, I was finally able to see properly again. However, the only difference was that I was still able to see auras. Raiya also stopped following me around.
The palace was pretty peaceful. ZhouHan said that everyone was busy preparing for the dead army, so they were located elsewhere. Even I didn't see him much. Even so, wouldn't there at least be a servant or a couple people here and there? Isn't it a bit too empty?
Since no one was here, I decided to take a little stroll through corridors and courtyards. The palace was really such a beautiful place. Plum blossom trees located near every wall. Small ponds with spotted fishes (koi fishes). Everything was vast and grand. There were vibrant colors everywhere and it was so full of life.
After walking for a bit longer I stopped to rest in an area with a bunch of plum blossom trees lined in rows and columns. As I walked into the field of trees I heard music. It sounded like a flute and some other instrument I've never heard of before, but it was similar to a drum. The only difference was that the sound lasted shorter with many different pitches (zither).
I don't know what it was, but listening to other people play with their instrument made me want to dance. There was no one around anyway, so I danced. Mimicking those same moves I once saw a long time ago. My body was light and it felt as though the breeze moved along with me.
In the middle of dancing I took off my shoes and followed the beat. I didn't know what it was, but dancing made me feel so alive like I had nothing to worry about. Suddenly, someone shouted out,
"Who's there?!"
I stopped dancing and grabbed my shoes as I ran off. It'd be embarrassing if anyone saw me dancing. Afterall, men don't really dance. The person chased me and yelled for me to stop running, but I didn't. However, I wasn't a very fast runner and I was getting tired.
Suddenly, someone pulls me behind a wall covering my mouth as the person chasing me runs passed by us.
"What are you doing here?" The person holding me ask as he removes his hand off my mouth.
"I was just looking around. I'm sorry if I trespassed into an area I wasn't supposed to be in." I replied.
I turned around to look who he was and it was Raiya. His brows pinched and his glare was cold. My body trembled in fear and I couldn't look him in the eyes. Instead, I looked down and noticed that his aura was a dark red.
I thought his aura was gray. If it wasn't him that looked after me those past several weeks, then who was it? My body trembled even more at the thought of someone else other than Raiya touching me.
I was quite the fool thinking that Raiya would embrace me so gently. Right now he's furious. Of course, he would be really mad knowing that someone like me was here in a palace. Afterall, I don't belong here.
"I-I'll leave." I said as I turned around to walk back. I could feel my eyes tear up and his cold gaze piercing through me. Why do I always give myself false hope? There's no way Raiya would ever take care of me or look at me the same way I look at him. If he knew, he'd probably be disgusted with me.
After reaching ZhouHan's quarters I buried myself under the blanket. I wish I was numb to this kind of pain as well. My body trembles non stop and my chest and stomach felt like something was crushing my organs. How do I make this go away? When will it stop? This suffocating feeling.
I crouched in bed the entire night weeping until I fell alseep. That night I had nightmares of the time when he had hated me to the point of wanting to kill me and I wondered, If he had just ended my life there I wouldn't have to experience this. I just want someone to need me or want me in their life.
As if answering my plea, a shadow appears late in the night holding me down with a dagger against my neck as he covered my mouth.
"Good evening golden egg." said the man. "If you shout, I'll kill everyone here."
I nodded my head and he let go of me. I sat up on the edge of the bed and noticed his mask when the moonlight shined upon him. It was the Raven that I had last encountered. I am really unlucky today.
"I'll make this quick. If you quietly come with me, I won't take any lives today." the Raven said coldly.
"Do you need me?" I ask as his eyes narrowed.
"I do. I especially need your eyes."
"Will you gouge them out?"
"If you come with me willingly, I probably wouldn't have to." he tilted his head and crossed his arms.
"Can I leave behind a letter? I won't mention you, just a farewell."
The Raven gestured that he allowed it and so I wrote a letter to ZhouHan. The Raven watched me as I wrote my letter.
"Will they even be able to read that?" he asked.
I couldn't help, but laugh a little as I looked down on my poorly written letter.
"I just recently learned how to read and write." I said as I folded the piece of paper and set it on the table. "I don't have much belongings just what's on me."
After that, the Raven carried me over his shoulder and took me away. I smiled painfully as tears fell from my eyes. With this, Raiya doesn't have to worry about unexpectedly seeing me again. I also won't ever see him again. This unbearable pain that won't fade away, I hope it dies along with me.