What is this feeling? It makes me want to puke, but I'm not sick. My body feels both light and heavy and my hands are trembling. I also feel a bit of sadness, but not completely. I don't understand this feeling, but after a while it disappeared and I was fine.
After the wedding, Meiyi left the Yun family. The brothers stayed for a few days before leaving, but only Hulang didn't leave. Instead he followed me day after day.
In the past, he was always quiet. He doesn't show much expressions and he never says anything more than he needs to. He was always straight to the point and compared to the other siblings, he bullied me the least. It used to be Raiya, but now it was Hulang.
Why was he following me everyday? He has never done anything like this before. Perhaps he's willing to talk to me? Ah, but he doesn't talk much. I sat on the patio outside of my room and started at the garden in front of me. Suddenly he sits next to me and I jumped from shock.
"What are you doing?" He asked.
"..." Ah... How should I answer? Even I don't know what I'm doing.
"I wonder why he's so into you. From what I see, you stay in your room all day or take walks in the hallway. You're boring."
"What's 'into me'?"
"... You're dumb too." he sighed.
These brothers really do love to sigh. It sounds as if they're always troubled.
"I can't do anything." I said.
"Hmm?"
"I've been blind almost my entire life. I can't read or write. I only walk in the hallways because I'm scared of getting lost. I stay in my room, so I don't bother the people around me. There's also a lot of things I don't understand, so I can't do anything."
"Do you want to learn?"
"Isn't it too late? I'm already 18. I can't join the army because I'm weak and I can't get married off into a family because I'm not talented."
"Age doesn't matter and only women can get married off. In this world you can learn anything. I'll teach you. I have time anyway since I was forced to stay here."
"Why? Don't you also hate me?"
"No. I wish to fix my wrong doings. All the things you want to learn I'll teach you in exchange for my own selfishness."
"Selfishness?"
"I don't want to live my life in guilt. I'll be here for 6 months, so I'll teach you everything you need to know to survive in this world."
"..."
I look at Hulang in surprise. He is willing to teach me things I want to know. The Hulang that rarely speaks and hated seeing me is now talking to me and properly looking at me.
"I don't expect you to forgive me. I'm just doing this for myself. I can't fix that brain of yours, but I can at least help you regain your strength."
After saying that, he left for 2 days to get me the proper training gear. When he returned, he started training me. He said I needed to start slow and gain some stamina, so he made me run everyday. I also did some basic exercises like meditation and learned how to control my breathing. It was difficult, but I wanted to keep going. I was finally doing something.
Sometimes he would teach me how to read and write. Reading and writing was a lot easier than gaining stamina. I loved the feel of the brush in my hands and the characters I made with every stroke.
"Your handwriting sucks. Make it more elegant."
"...Elegant?"
"Mmm elegant like Naiwei's writing style. I'll get you an example."
Hulang runs out of my room and two minutes later he returns with a piece of paper as he spreads it open to show me.
"Like this. He's light on the brush and applies pressure when needed."
I look at the elegant strokes, but I couldn't help reading it as well.
"He spreads her legs open and slowly bends down to tak-" I read aloud.
"That fool!" Hulang grabs the sheet of paper and scrunched it up before lighting it on fire. "I'll bring you a better example next time."
"Okay."
In 3 months I gained more stamina and my health was improving. I also learned how to read and write, but not very well because there were too many words and phrases I didn't know. Hulang told me to memorize more words before I continued to read and write.
"Now that you have more stamina. I'll teach you some defense moves. Everything I teach you is for your own benefit. Don't forget, even if your opponent is stronger than you, they will always have a weak spot. It's okay to play dirty when your life is in danger. Aim for the eyes. If you can't then attack the groin area."
"Why the groin area?"
"Do you want to experience it?"
"Ha~?" as I stood there, Hulang kneed my groin area and I fell down in pain and cried.
"Remember that feeling. All men's weakness is there." He said as her holds out his hand to help me up.
With teary eyes and my face flushed by the heat and pain, I grabbed his hand as he stared at me.
"Mmm. I can see why he was caught. It's quite enticing. Innocent and appealing. Just his type. Mine as well. Too bad you're a man."
"What?"
"Nothing. You're too unguarded. You need to be cautious with your surroundings and you need to read your opponent before he reads you."
For the next 3 months, Hulang taught me how to defend and protect myself. I could feel my body get stronger day by day. I was also able to read books and write on paper although I wasn't very good.
"I'm going back. Remember to keep training."
"Thank you Hulang."
"Don't thank me. Didn't I say I was doing this for my own selfishnes? I really can't fix that brain of yours."
Embarrassed by his reply I couldn't look him in the eyes and my face blushed. I really don't care if it was because of his selfishnes. I was just happy that he spent time teaching me.
"Innocent and appealing. Should I have a taste?"
Hulang walks up to me and pulls my chin up as he bends down to kiss me. I tightly shut my eyes as he slips his tongue into my mouth and pulls the back of my head up to him. He was tall, almost as tall as Raiya, but his build was more slender. Our tongues intertwined for a long time. He sucked my tongue and lightly nibbled on it. My voice would occasionally let out muffled noises as I struggled to breathe. Just as I was about to black out he pulls us apart and said,
"I still prefer women."
And then he walked off on his way back to the army.