My name is Jen, he was Zen.

The night we were engaged, he sat beside me and leaned on my shoulder with a sensation of sweet liquor. He hugged me tight and threw himself back on those times I can't remember when.

"I miss spending our time together with no one except for the beautiful sunset and sunrise.

I miss dancing with you with no music.

I miss listening to ocean's musical waves with you, with you Jen" he spoke with an unwell voice.

I hugged him tighter than he could give "Baby, we never did those" I said and kissed his forehead "You're just drunk, let's go inside" I added.

Everyday was valued.

Every second was sweet.

And everyday was loved.

One day while I was on my way to somewhere, a stranger popped in front of me. She was covered with sweats, she wore a frightened makeup and her contact lenses was made of tears "A-Are you Jen? Fiancée of Zen?" Breathless she asked.

The time was so quick, I couldn't even grasp every single scenario.

She took me in a place where tears are everywhere, where everyone's tongue was marked with "Be strong Jen, I'm sorry for your loss". Yes, we're here.. in the hospital.

I went closely to my love's lifeless body.

My heart broke into pieces but his face seemed to be wrapped with happiness.

"You told me to spend the rest of your life with me" I caressed him.

"I'm sorry" the stranger woman said while she was mourning. "He saved me from a car accident"

He saved her but I never felt any anger toward her.

Not even a single madness.

My mother in law tapped my back and whispered "That woman is Zen's ex-girlfriend. Her name is also Jen" she informed me while staring at the woman I called 'stranger'

It was her...

Zen's best woman...

Zen's best memory...

It was Jen, not me...

I drew near her, I took off my engagement ring and put it on her "He loves you" I bravely said while fighting with the hardest pain I've ever encountered.

My heart was broke into pieces,

My tears are endless,

I was entrenched with sadness,

And I can never get out of these.

After all it was not me,

Before me there was she,

And it's not I who deserve his "Will you marry me?"

I'm still thankful.

For once in my life I've experienced the most amazing days with the man who could never be with me 'till the end.

For once in my life, I've experienced being loved though I don't know if it was real.

Criptica_G