(Alïa's pov)
_________
I was still in his arms looking at his eyes, he had eyes as open and honest as any child, a warmth and safety. In that moment I found my home, my place to find company when the cold winds blew. But what I didn't know was people change,feelings change,things change. From that day onwards I would meet him everyday in the park and play with him. Building a castle,playing with balls and enjoying each other's presence. One day,however he wasn't there. I was 14 years old by now,it has been exactly 9 years since we started meeting each other. On a normal summer day,the warmth of the summer left a fortnight ago but it is only today for the first time since last winter that I can feel the frigid concrete through the soles of my shoes. The air flows through the fabric of my clothes just like it did in the summer and early fall, but now I can't help but notice it. I turn to smile at Henry but he isn't there. My heart skips, then pounds. Where is he?
That's how I lost all my trust in humanity after that day I was not myself. In fact my father locked me up in my room and made me home schooled. I never had any other friend,neither did I want to have one. I was too broken inside, as any other day I was sitting in my room crying,sobbing. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around my shins; if I could just curl up into a ball, I wouldn't have to face real life, I'd be protected from everything around me.
But I'd still have to live with myself, with the wretched memories swirling around in my head. My eyes, already red and puffy from crying, squeezed shut to push more tears out. I let my head fall down to my knees, and I pulled my legs closer to me.
No matter what I did, there was no where I could hide from the thoughts in my head. I missed him so much,he was my best friend.
In fact I was in love with him. His deep soothing voice is what I crave for and his warmth is what I covet. When he smiled at me it seemed as if the whole world is mine. When we exchanged looks it felt as if everything has paused and belonged right in its place. He was mesmerising, he had oceanic eyes. These feeling I had for him are stronger than just admiration, but I hated him for what he did to me, and it spread throughout my entire system, shutting down all other feelings for him.
I will never forgive you, Henry.