PLEASE READ THIS. Okay, so basically my brain was stupid last chapter. It thought that it was introducing depth to a certain someone, but it kinda just made him sound like a psychotic murderer instead. So I scrapped some things, added some things, and I now believe that the last chapter is much better. So please read the other chapter again! :)
"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand;
They listen with the intent to reply."
(But you should fear the ones who do not need to listen to understand) - Me
-Stephen Covey
The whole world seemed like it had a muffler on it, some kind of weight that made opening one's mouth as hard as ascending to the heavens. Of course, there was no actual 'muffler' that had descended down onto the Earth. It was a simple psychological restriction, forged in the fires of terror and panic. And after being doused in the water of reality, a chain of the psyche was finally completed.
He just had to be very careful; the chains were still relatively brittle. If he loosened up in any way or showed mercy...
They would shatter alongside his plans of revenge.
'That said, I can't be too strict either. You never know how people will react when the stress gets too much for them. They might just decide to do a suicidal charge in the hope of getting me off-guard, damn the consequences. While they have proven to be somewhat resistant to stress in the whole USJ mess, this is an entirely different ballpark. And they're (in-training) heroes on top of it all. You can never be sure what will set off their justice radar. And they're incredibly stubborn-... Aghhh, this is why I don't like hostage situations.'
He felt his quirk flicker on and off once more, and he desperately tried to not showcase his irritation to the world. Just when he was adapting to not having his quirk (you would think it would be pretty easy, having lived over 99% of his life without a quirk, but some things became both a clutch and the norm scarily quick), Aizawa would faze out of consciousness for a few seconds, before locking eyes with him again.
He honestly wished he would just pick one and be done with it, whether that be consciousness or unconscious.
It messed him up to feel the familiar hum of electricity within his body, and then to have it gone in the next. He was tempted to just close his eyes and be done with it all, but he wasn't exactly trained to perceive things without his sight. Sure, his quirk sped up the speed of his thoughts and the overall quality of his brain, but that was only because it was in his brain. He had never been blind or deaf either, so his senses were just as good as a regular person (not good at all).
Thus, if he had to deal with a headache and the inking that something was wrong, then he would deal with it.
(It switched on and off so quickly that it was hard to pinpoint, but something felt... weird when he did have his quirk.)
As much as he would love to further investigate it, he had some antsy teens on his hand.
"...You may talk if you want to. As long as you don't move any closer or make any suspicious movements, I honestly couldn't care less as to what you decide to do," He slightly slid the gun down to a place on her leg, making sure that in the event that he did have to shot that it would be in the spot with the least damage. "Of course, considering you've already gotten your warning, if I have to shot... It will hurt."
The two of them made no move to speak, which was somewhat expected. Just because he said such a thing didn't mean there would be any intermediate takers. But it did serve its purpose to a degree because it had interrupted the tension strained atmosphere. It was unexpected and got them out of the fight or flight state, while still maintaining his control of the situation. Well, hypothetically at least.
It seemed to be more effective than he previously thought, as Todoroki actually began to speak.
"...Why would you want us to talk? That sounds rather illogical coming from you of all people."
Although the last sentence was a could decimals lower, Deku could still hear it. He smiled slightly. It seemed that Todoroki was taking calculated risks now. To see whether he was motivated by rationality (as he had shown so far) or with emotions. If he continued to be rational and kept his word, it was a realistic assumption that Deku wouldn't hurt Urakaka further and keep his promise to release her. If he reacted with violence because of his emotions... Well, it was safe to say that they'd do anything to get her out of his grasp.
That, or he could just be passive-aggressive, but Deku had a rather high expectation in regard to his intelligence.
He wasn't the type to make mistakes and not learn from them.
"You are smarter than what people give you credit for. Rest assured, even if you get snarky with me, I won't harm a single hair on her head. As long as you just wait for my colleague to come, she will be released without any further damage. I don't derive any sort of pleasure from hurting people, after all. Is that enough to assuage your worries?"
"How did you-?!"
"The eyes are the window to the soul. And for all that the mind lies, cheats, and forgets, the soul remains clear and expressive. It's easy to establish a baseline off of that, and use rationality to fill in the rest of the gaps. For instance, right now you are uneasy and are reeling from the lack of control you are feeling. But I'm telling the truth when I say I don't read minds; you've seen my quirk, haven't you? I can't read your every move, but I do know basic psychology. My knowledge can't determine 100% of your feelings but I can determine about 50%."
He lightly paused at the stares he was receiving but continued onward regardless.
"That's usually enough to get a pretty good picture of what the other person is thinking and planning. And while a lack of control can be incredibly intimidating, you have no reason to be afraid of me. As long as you abide by my rules, that is. You've confirmed I'm not primarily motivated by emotions all by yourself, so essentially there's a very very low chance that I'll do anything not in line with my interests. Which is getting out of here. For all that other humans are predictable, I myself am as predictable, if not more. Make of that what you will."
The clearing descended into silence once more, populated by children who were more confused than angry at the present moment. He took the opportunity while they were all occupied with their thoughts to examine Aizawa out of the corner of his eye. He thought that he would have put up more of a fight considering how he reacted at USJ, but he hadn't. And while it was true that will didn't magically resolve injures...
He didn't need to be physically mobile to make an impact. He did have a gun, but it wasn't as if they were invincible. A tool was only as good as its wielder, and he would be the first to admit that he sucked at this particular tool. He could never bring himself to use it after he killed her, and something about guns had him disliking it from the very beginning. It was only because he knew that he would be in regular contact with Eraserhead that he forced himself to procure one. That foresight was coming in handy now.
If only he didn't fail spectacularly with the weapon.
It was fine because he was using it at point-blank range at the present moment, but any farther than that... He ran a risk of hitting the students instead (or more likely, the surrounding plant life...). He couldn't get a very good read on Aizawa, so he would just have to keep his guard up for the time being. He felt a slight shuffling from his hostage, and he immediately came back to reality.
"You-"
"...Don't worry. I'm not going to escape. You just seemed distracted, and I need to ask you a question. It's fine for me to talk, right?"
'This girl... She has me between a rock and a hard place, forcing me to either revoke my earlier words or force punishment regardless.'
He faintly sighed, a quiet sound that even Urakaka almost didn't pick up on.
"Fine, I won't hurt you for a tiny little movement," His eyes shone such a dark shade of red, that the color almost overpowered the contacts he was wearing. "Be warned that my mercy is limited, though. In fact, were it anything more than a shuffle, I wouldn't have bothered with mercy. I hope your question is worth the risk you just took upon yourself."
"...It's worth it. Why... Why are you a villain if it hurts you so much?"
His eyes opened wide as if the statement had hit him like a brick.
"You were hurting when you fired at me, weren't you? I could see it in your eyes. You even apologized so only I could hear when you first took me hostage. If... If you don't like doing these things, then why are you forcing yourself? If you're being forced, then UA can-!"
He sighed, this time loud enough for everyone to clearly pick up on.
"I knew being read like a book was unpleasant, but I didn't expect it to be this bad. Well, I suppose the day had to come eventually," He looked up at the sky, unable to continue eye contact. It really was unpleasant. "But to answer your question... To be honest, I'm not quite sure nowadays. I had a reason in the beginning... But I find myself questioning if all of this is truly worth it. All of the pain, the death."
He continued on just like a floodgate had been opened. He couldn't stop himself now.
(He wasn't sure he wanted to.)
"Sure, what happened to me was a tragedy and all, but does it really justify going this far? Actually, I already know the answer to that question. I'm just... incredibly selfish. Beyond what you could think was possible. Ah, I got off-topic. Sorry about that."
"Izuku-"
He looked away from the sky and back on Earth, only to remember that Bakugo was still there. He had admittedly forgotten about him, seeing as even Todoroki spoke more than him during this whole event. The sight of him planted a seed of frustration back in the soil of his mind. Objectively, he knew it was ridiculous to continue to hang on to this grudge, especially at the cost of other's lives, but it was hard to keep an emotional distance to his problems when it was right. in. front. of. him.
"Well, maybe it's worth it. I can't say until I achieve my 'goal'. But I'll tell you something, Urakaka."
His smile tasted incredibly bitter, even to himself.
"I... can't go back anymore, so it's pointless to even ask."