This little girl, she seems to know a lot even though she purposely tried to avoid getting involved at the begining. No, it can not be called that, she did not knowingly tried to avoid it, but more like she was looking some peace of mind.
If I were in her shoes... Would I do the same? I am not so sure.
Putting that hypothetical idea aside, I find it odd how much those people insist on involving her but without her knowledge. They seek something from her... but it does not look like they want the person herself. Hmmm, if they are after a particular object and she unknowingly were to leave it in her bedroom, then they would've already taken such a thing. So what they want should not be there. Meaning that she could be carrying it with her? I don't think it is as simple as that. This is such a mess.
Unaware of my internal struggles, she kept talking.
"After the trying so hard to find the book but coming empty handed, I decided to stop looking. So many travels like that would put them on guard and they might try something against me. My situation is not that good in the manor and they may use that.
Since I was born I was allowed to wander around on my own, I did not pay attention why things were like that. I was happy because I could go around as I liked while mom worked, not everyone was nice to us but they did not treat us poorly. That was until mom died... I was really sad, I was all by myself. No one wanted to get involved with me after that happened. Well, not more than they had to, I could still get food and my bedroom remained the same so I guess I was lucky. But then I started to find people talking bad things about me behind my back.
That made even sadder, when mom died, no one cared. They just came one day and told me that. I did not want to believe at the beginning, I thought that maybe they were just being mean. But mom never came back so I had to accept it. To be honest they sometimes told me that mom abandoned me... but mom really loved me, so that was a lie. It had to be... if that was a lie, then she dying... had to be the true"
While she started to talk about her mother, she tightened her tiny fist like she was holding back something. But that did not help as her eyes started to water until... the dam broke and she started crying. Honestly, she should not hold back. I wish to continue hearing what she was talking about, but I can't just ignore this.
"The-"
"Wait, let's stop right here"
As I say that I tried to check my pockets for a handkerchief... which I found another one besides the snacks filled one. I don't recall having more than once, but then I seem to remember having my clothes washed from the people here. I wonder why they added a handkerchief to my stuff. I should question that later now I have something more important to do.
"Why? I hav-"
"You can tell me about it later"
As I said that, I use the handkerchief to gently wipe her tears.
While I do that I can not help but to remember back then. When I did the same to her. She was slightly younger that this girl. But she was crying the same way, she was rather stubborn and did not want to admit it.
"What are you doing?"
Even though she said that, she did not try to stop me and just let me wipe her tears.
"I'm wiping your tears, I just don't want you to cry. It may look a little weird, since we hardly know each other. But you remind me of someone. I guess I acted on impulse"
She heard what I said but did not comment on it. I wonder if I went to far... I am still a stranger so maybe she lets me do it because she is afraid? Now that I give it some thought, I am being quite reckless. Just because I was reminded of her at that time does not mean I can just start treating this child the same way.
Regardless my inner thoughts, she waited until I finished before she spoke again. In a really low tone of voice she said.
"Thank you..."
Since I was still close to her I could hear it clearly. I guess she did not mind it, glad to hear that then.
"Listen, I know you may not believe this, and words from a stranger might be meanless. But I don't think your mother abandoned you. I do not know anything about her, but just the way you talked about her I can tell you cherished her a lot. And I am sure she cherished back just as much. I am not sure what happened, but I am certain that it is not like those people told you"
My reason is not really pure, since I am just projecting her on this child. But I can not deny that I also want to help her aside from that. I am such a busybody.
I am actually quite curious about her mother now, she mentioned about how she could wander around while her mother played but did not tell me what kind of work. There was also the problem of the hostility of the servants... I felt slightly bad for them when I heard how they were fired, but now that I hear what kind of people were they in front of Noir, well, let's say that I think they deserved something worse. I guess that it's good I don't get to decide their fate.
Ah ah, while I was thinking that I noticed that her eyes were watering again. Did I say something bad? I don't think what I said was that bad? Could it be that I was insensitive since I talked about her mother without knowing her at all? Ah, I guess that was bad idea.
"Do you really believe that...?"
"Eh?"
"Is what you said... what you really think?"
Yikes... One wrong word and she may crying pretty badly. Did I really screw up?
"Tell me..."
Looking at her face right now, I don't think I could talk my way out this with lies. Let's resign myself to whatever happens.
So I turn to answer her.
"I really believe that, look I know that I never met her. But I don't think that with the way you talk about her, she would just disappear without saying anything. As for whether she really died or not. I can not answer that. I will not give you a false hope. I am sorry if that came as harsh or rude. But I don't want to lie to you. You have heard enough of that"
This is truly what I think... I don't really what to lie. But maybe lying would less harsh for her. Still, I think she had enough of that.
I awaited for her to cry but it did not happen. She seemed lost in thought before she used her own hands to wipe her tears.
"I want to believe you... So I will believe you. What you said, I hope that you don't forget about it"
She said this with a resolute look on her face. Well, I could take her more seriously if she had wiped her face correctly. It's a mess. Well, I understand that she was serious about what she said so that's it.
I can't help but feel that I won't be able to avoid her now that I said that.
Her mother, huh. From what Noir said, she used to work here some time ago. Her relationship with most employees was pretty bad as described by Noir, but they at least held themselves back when she was present. After her 'death' or 'disappearence' those people stopped holding back, I wonder if the ones that got along with the mother and daughter duo kept acting that way. No use thinking, I should just ask about it. Another point I noticed was the lack of her father, she did not mention him in any way. Which takes us to a couple of possibilities, he either died early or he abandoned the mother, I shouldn't forget the possibility that he just like the mother... 'went away'. Whatever the case, it surely happened when Noir was too young since she can't recall it. Well, it could also be that she just don't want to talk about it.
She finally calmed down her emotions after giving her a moment to rest. I wish to ask a few things but so far what she has said had plenty of useful information so I should wait for her to finish telling me what she wants. Although I should ask first if she is up to it, if she is not feeling good enough to talk then there is no need to push herself. We could talk later after all.
"Do you want to continue? Aren't you tired? We can talk at some other time"
I said which she replied.
"I don't feel like talking now...
I guess recalling that was harsh for her. Well, she already said a lot, I am not in hurry for now.
"It's fine, then go and rest. You have helped me a lot already. You now need to take care of yourself"
"Are you sure? Yo-"
"I said it's fine. Now go and rest"
"But..."
What troublesome child, she said she did not feel like talking and now she insist to continue.
"No buts, just go"
I said that and stood up, lightly patted her head and just went downstairs.
Although... I did not think about it very well, I wanted to go to my bedroom. But since the stairs were closer and I wanted to flee fast I just went down. I really can not just go back, she is still there. I said all that and tried to act cool leaving like that... going back will be lame. I should try to not do that again. Anyways, I should take a look around the manor. I am not found of talking to the other people of the manor but I wish to look for that library that Noir mentioned and maybe I could find some interesting information on one the rooms 'they' might use.Also the library has the problem that I won't be able to enter without a key so I should at least know where to use the key if I found it.
*******************************************
Well, looking seemed easy enough. I just wandered around the manor, and as expected most rooms were locked. But thanks to subtly (I hope) asking about it, I could learn what those rooms were about it. Not like I got the answer I wanted to, most of them were from the Kingwood's family personal use. They were not accesible for us, the guests. Although I did heard about a good number of facilities outside the manor that we as guest could use freely. While that would've been nice if I had come here to play around, in my current situation was rather useless information... not like I could tell that to the employees that kindly explained such a thing to me. I mostly spend my time searching on the lower floors of the manor, and pretty much left me with a small part of the lower floor and the whole upper floors.
My search came to a stop on the same area as the library, meaning... the first floor. There was this rather different door, which of course was locked. The design of this door in particular was much more detailed than the others in a great deal, I did find in fact the lock to be rather old looking with an unique shape so this might be it. Then I tried to look for it but not strange symbol came in sight. That made me a bit disappointed but quickly recovered. I was expecting to find that thing carved here since it seemed different from the other doors but I might've been to naive to think I would find more objects like that so easily. After that, I just went to another place with more maids to ask about that door. So many questions would put some people on guard but I don't think that it would change that many things since they already should have an eye on me. The answer I obtained from the maids was rather ambiguous since they did not know about what was behind it, but the had heard that not many people could enter and they needed a rather special old looking key with a weird shape. That proved to be rather useful info, maybe too much. I could understand them having some knowledge about the door since it is rather unique, and people would get curious about it... but they seem to know quite a bit for simple workers. I should probably ask other people just confirm whether that info is common knowledge or not, right now being cautious is not a bad idea. Still I need to check behind the door to confirm if this is truly the place I am looking for.
*******************************************
I spend a while trying to subtly ask people about that door, but most answers were quite similar in content. Although I shouldn't get confident and lower my guard, I can help but wonder if I overreacted when I heard what those maids said.
With that off the list I am now left without much to do at the moment. So I began to think back at what Noir told me. In particular, the part about how them got the key is what I am interested. Noir said they should not have one but they suddenly got it... That means they got it from somewhere, or someone. Considering who was the owner of the manor at that time or around that time since he had already died, I can be certain that the owner had a key to the library. I really doubt he would have a room in the manor that he wouldn't be able to access, unless he himself did not want to enter... in case of personal rooms it should be like that, but that library would surely a place he could not do something like that. Then, that leaves him as one of the carries of the key. Now, things get tricky from here, since I don't know how many of those there are, I need to figure out the before I start suspecting other people of owning or carrying one. The number should not be that high, and currently there should be one in the hands of them.... I can not be certain if that is the same one as the former owner of the manor. I can not help but suspect that they used the timing when everyone were busy dealing with the death of the late Mr. Kingwood to steal his key. Noir tired of all that situation did actively try avoid the rest of the stuff that happened back then so she wouldn't know... it really sounds like that could've happened. But I can not throw aways the possibility of someone giving them a key.
Argh, how troublesome... talking about people who would know more about what happened back then. I think there are at least a few people I've met that would know. I can assume that the old man Leonard who is also a Kingwood would surely have an idea and maybe... he also has a key, and from the way he talked about certain people, I doubt he would lend a hand to them. So I can assume he still has his key? If he had one to be begin with anyways.
If we continue this train of thoughts, then that Miss named Alice should be knowledgeable on the subject as well, since she is also aiming to be the head of the family... then I doubt she would not be well informed about anything that has happened in the manor. Hmm, the key is a different subject though, I think she has a high change of owning one since from what I can tell that 'library' has some pretty interesting information regarding this family.
The next person I thought of... It's the head of security in this manor. It would make sense of him being aware of all the stuff that happens here since his jobs probably requires him to be present when a problem arises. If he is trust worthy enough in the eyes of head of family then he would probably carry a key too.
As for the last person that for sure has the knowledge and the key is the current head of the family... in name only apparently. That does not change the fact that he probably knows more than most people here. Well, that is only what I think, I can not rule out the fact that any of the people I mentioned before know more than they let other people believe.
This is quite the headache, I am sure how to approach any of them without making them feel suspicious of me... although I seem to recall certain thing a I was told just this morning that could help me approach one them. Well, that just mean I can approach him but it would be only in relation to help him finding the person who got into my bedroom last night. Security reasons or not, I might heard something interesting if I cooperate to his proposal. I guess I really did not have a choice but to accept what he told me huh.