In my dream, Jessica had to fight a beast in the form of a girl in a white room, but the girl in front of me could not be called a beast in any way.
The girl was crying hard in the corner, naked . She looked like she was out of breath and could die by herself at any moment.
Is that girl was me? I ask myself self. Because I know from the dream that everyone had to fight their real self.
And since the dream was kind of true, was that mean that deep down, I was just a scare little girl, it couldn't be, right?
After everything I had been through, That girl could not be me, right? Right?
Please tell me it just a joke. God the girl who looked like me was not me, you definitely sent me into the wrong room.
"Please don't hurt me" the girl's whisper interrupted my thought.
She still in the corned, crying but right now she was kneeling, her hands pressed together in front of her chest.
Exactly the way I did when I beg the boss to stop hitting me.
I am her. That thought hit me real hard. There was no way I could deny that.
"Why?" I said that after a few moments in silence.
The girl looked confused, she didn't understand what I mean.
"Why?"I asked again, louder this time
The girl still kept her mouth shut.
"Why the fuck didn't you attack?" I screamed and tears started to form in my eyes.
"Why the hell did you do nothing? Begging for mercy? Like it ever works."
I might said that to her, but I knew that the word was meant for me.
" You are a coward, no wonder they do whatever they want to you, you deserve everything you got" I roared so loud that my voice begin to crack.
"Stop "she whispered face full of tears.
"Stop? You said that like they listen, have they ever? you acted like you were tough to Jessica and all but you are nothing, you just a toy, slut!"
I said that before I charged at her.
But Second, before I could grab her she stopped crying and smiled at me.
She moved and I hit the wall real hard.
It hurt quite a lot but it woke me up from my madness.
My head cleared up, and the smile made me realize something,
I didn't do anything not because I am weak but because I was waiting.
I wait for the moment to hit back.
It meant that I am not weak and I am not going to endorse any longer.
"Stupid girl, you hate yourself so much for doing nothing. You should give yourself more credit. If you haven't endured for this long, you wouldn't be able to survive."
The girl said that to me before starting to hit me in the face.